If you're good looking, be NICE!

[Dragoo]

Is calling a girl a lard a*s and saying that they have a beetle juice head ****y and Funny??? If it isn't what would you call it?

 

[Duffdog]

Is calling a girl a lard a*s and saying that they have a beetle juice head ****y and Funny??? If it isn't what would you call it?

I would just call it dumb. It doesn't seem funny or cool or anything, just seems like you are covering your own insecurities by making fun of a girl. I think that real c+F starts with the female saying something modest and you coming back with something unexpected. Just going up to a girl and saying something negative without anything from her is just stupid. Here is a good example of me being ****y naturally:

hb "wow, your really good at bowling, you're starting to make me look bad"
d "I make all girls look bad"
hb "pfft...whatever (smile)"

 

[Dragoo]

I would just call it dumb. It doesn't seem funny or cool or anything, just seems like you...

It isn't me bruh.

 

[Duffdog]

It isn't me bruh.

I didnt mean you personally, I meant whomever I was hearing doing something like that. One of the faults of written communication.

 

[DonGorgon]

All this BS about acting ****y and trying to be Mr. Too Cool, etc.

If you're good looking, it isn't necessary, trust me. It'll make you come off as an ass, and most girls will just think you're not interested in them. Being nice has gotten more panties thrown at me than acting ****y.

The last couple of weeks I decided to try something, different... being nice.

There was this cute girl I made eye contact with at work. I struck up a conversation with her in the elevator. Instead of negging, teasing, etc, I just asked her if she was ready for winter with a smile (we just had a big snowfall) she smiled and said "man summer went by so quick". I replied "Yeah we should book a flight to Hawaii". She laughed. Her floor came and I said "Take it easy we'll see ya around".

The next day she sat at my table in the breakroom and we just talked. Toward the end of the conversation I said "Hey what's your number, let's hang out sometime". She gave me her number and seem flattered. Had 2 great dates so far.

I thought okay, it's one girl.

Then I really tested it. Yesterday at the mall I saw this really cute HB9 looking at clothes. She was holding up this cute little dress. I walked up next to her, grabbed a dress and held it to my body. I said "You think this is my color?" She busted out laughing. I was like "Yeeah, I think it'd look better on you... Actually I just came over here to get your number... did it work?" She read off her number and said "I guess it did" with a smile on her face. Called her today and set up a date.

The advice on this site is geared more towards nerds who don't know what they're doing. It trys to put them on a pedestal and make them feel like the prize. Which is good, and probably gives them confidence. But to the good looking guys, it's unnecessary.

You don't need to be overly confident or ****y. Make HER the prize. Most women will be flattered that a good looking guy is hitting on them.

Don't listen to these people that tell you it'll come off as needy. It's a crock of sh!t.

Use your looks to your advantage.

VERY SMOOTH APPROACHES... BUT I CAN TELL THAT THOSE WOMEN FOUND YOU ATTRACTIVE ENOUGH TO BE OPEN WITH YOU... When a woman finds you attractive almost any old approach will work cause she is open to you.. Women are more judgmental of your approach when they find you unattractive...

 

[Asteconn]

Is this confusing "nice" with "respectful"?

 

[DonJuan11]

Average lookin girls get approached more than hot girls, as most dudes don't even think they have a shot with the hot chicks (out of my league syndrome), so these average (at best) looking chicks have inflated egos.

I don't think so.

Hot girls are the girls all the guys want to have sex with and to be seen with, and to have as girlfriends. The average girl, any guy can get because he doesn't care about the results. If she shoots him down, the next one is right there waiting for him. I guarantee you would respond more often and more favorably if a hot girl called / texted / emailed you than a average looking one. Don't tell us otherwise or that you are "above" all that, because you'd be lying if you did.

When a hot girl phones me, I respond in 2 seconds. When an average one does, I respond in 2 weeks, if I feel like it.

 

[sprint]

This thread is very good. After trying the C&F a lot I've decided it kinda makes you seem like more of a jerk than anything, especially if you use it too much. So recently I've scaled it back a great deal, only throwing it in when necessary or when I know she'll laugh, and I get better results.

But the problem is the word "nice". You shouldn't be mean to girl and if she thinks you are then you're doing it wrong. If you use too much C&F she'll think you're never serious and also kinda arrogant. If you are too "nice" she think you're a wimp. You have to find a medium where you're just nice enough, just funny enough, and confident (not ****y).

But I'm curious what do you guys think is "nice"? Don't exaggerate. maybe just some real examples.

IMO nice is when a guy pretty much does what he is told, never ever says anything mean to a girl, doesn't speak his mind, doesn't act confident, etc.

 

[Darth]

IMO nice is when a guy pretty much does what he is told, never ever says anything mean to a girl, doesn't speak his mind, doesn't act confident, etc.

Right. That's the BAD kind of nice.

The good kind of nice IMO involves smiling a lot, being interested in her personally, trying to make her feel more comfortable if she is nervous, etc.

BUT using a lot of qualifying questions, and if she says something really stupid, teasing her about it.

But for good-looking guys, I would go so far as to say, never use negs. Or at least very rarely. Because even if they have confidence, it can really hurt their feelings coming from you. I've done it. I regret it.

Unless a girl has given reason for you to believe she has a inflated ego, in which case go for it.

But IMO, for us good-looking guys, sometimes having the right attitude is all it takes.

Women are not attracted by arrogance, they are attracted to c&f but when a good looking nice guy tries to be ****y he comes off as arrogant and she feels she is out of his league. Most girls have low self steam and when you're good looking and you neg em it is different than a average looking guy neggin an hb 9 trying to bring her down to his level. I got all high into the ****y persona that i turned away every girl i went out with.

Bingo.

 

[dadmonson]

Can somebody post a video clip of a guy(either from a movie or in real life) acting ****y and funny with a girl.

Because when I think of ****y and funny I also think of corniness.

 

[Alphamale1821]

trpl post

 

[Alphamale1821]

dbl post

 

[everywomanshero]

What we're finding out here is that there is no one way to end up with a woman on your ****. Women are people and people react differently to different things and have different desires, experiences, etc. Even so, there are still some general principles that tend to put most people off or turn their heads, so the site can still be useful.

Even as a guy, I am starting to find that I can no longer be attracted to just any woman, regardless of how good looking she might be. THere are some things that come out of a woman's mouth that just put me off so much that I can't be attracted to her. For instance, I really am put off by people who are holy roler types. It doesn't have to be biblical either, it can be riding any political high horse. Honestly, I couldn't stand to be around one of those women to sleep with them. Im already limited more by time and energy than by choices. The point of this ramble? If you're good looking you're already kind of in for consideration, which the OP already said, but that you can still fvck things up by being obnoxious or seeming like a pedaphile-type and she can do the same with any guy who isn't desperate which is why women tend to be a little fake at first.

Here's a video to watch

 

[Hot Alpha Female]

I think looks on a guy are definitely an advantage. That depends on how good looking you are. You can probably get away with more things ... but your time is limited.

However if all you are doing is relying on your looks and have nothing else to offer, then some average ****y funny guy who knows what he is doing, is going to come along and steal that woman.

 

[slaog]

IMO nice is when a guy pretty much does what he is told, never ever says anything mean to a girl, doesn't speak his mind, doesn't act confident, etc.

Thats 'AFC nice' but it's not truely being nice.


Being nice comes from within. That means when you are nice you are coming from a place of high self esteem. Try faking it (like an AFC does) and you'll easily be found out because you're not being congruent.


When you are not truely nice and you are acting nice it means you are looking for something off somebody. Usually looking for them to like you.


Check out the Give Freely thread where I spoke about this.

 

[snowdog]

I think looks on a guy are definitely an advantage.

Yea, maybe. But without game it's nothing. Nothing. I have been told many times by many people I am a very handsome dude. Girls sometimes approach ME to start a conversation, and I can tell they base it on my looks. Yet a whole lot of guys out there who have got game without the looks, do much better then me in the girls department.

I'm not being a crybaby here, but it frustrates the sh*t out of me sometimes.

I'm doing better and better though, as you can see in my journal

 

[f283000]

Yea, maybe. But without game it's nothing. Nothing. I have been told many times by many people I am a very handsome dude. Girls sometimes approach ME to start a conversation, and I can tell they base it on my looks. Yet a whole lot of guys out there who have got game without the looks, do much better then me in the girls department.

I'm not being a crybaby here, but it frustrates the sh*t out of me sometimes.

I'm doing better and better though, as you can see in my journal

I had the same problem and there is a simple explanation. Yes when you are good looking you get more smiles, they start conversations sometimes instead of the other way around etc etc. The problem is that you being good looking won't change the way females are made, YOU STILL HAVE TO LEAD THEM, YOU STILL HAVE TO MAKE THE MOVE! YOU STILL HAVE TO ASK THEM OUT THEY WONT DO IT!

You getting smiles and having them talk to you is them giving you a green light pretty much. Even so they still expect you to be a man and ask them out, lead them, make your move etc. This is a fact that doesn't change whether you are ugly, average or good looking, women won't take the lead you have to do it!

That was the biggest mistake i was making with women. Getting smiles from random girls at campus and everywhere i went, getting looks, but not doing to well in actually getting lots of dates. Then i realized that i am getting green lights but i am not acting on it.

If you are good looking like you say you are there is only 1 thing you need to do, GET YOURSELF OUT THERE! talk to them, ask them out if you get signals. You will end up with plenty of dates you won't be turned down often. Just get yourself out there don't concentrate on 1 or just getting a gf, if you get signals ask for numbers (you won't get turned down often) start calling them, then ask for dates simple as that. You'll do well trust me.

The thing is though that being good looking will get you lots of numbers and dates if you show confidence and act on the signals you get, but you still need game to seduce them and achieve your goals. The advantage you have is that they want to be seduced by you and gave you signals for you to approach them. Whether you seduce them or f____ up is up to you.

 

[cloneofstenyhoyer]

this post made my day. it should be put in the DJ bible - for those of us who are over-gaming or negging unnecessarily.

 

[MetalFortress]

Well here's the deal with ME. I don't mean to brag but, I'm almost model-looking (I've got the rugged '70s NFL-player look, long hair). Restaurants always seat me or my party at the window so people walking by will see an attraction in addition to food. Happened for the zillionth time yesterday. They should PAY me to sit next to their window, to draw customers in.

Now, I will have waitresses (with a nose-ring, heart-shaped tatoo below her ear, etc.) really give me overt cues of interest besides her job as a waitress. I've had waitresses push other waitresses out of the way so that she could serve ME. When I Know that a woman is That interested, I just behave as if they're disturbing me, or "I'm not interested." I don't give them a reason. It's just that, the tatoo, the hook-nose, whatever is bothering me, and I could never see her as long-term material. Plus, maybe she has a fat ass or something stubby.

I'm REAL picky with girls because I get shown interest all the time. It sucks.

Uncle Rico Dynamite???

 

[snowdog]

I had the same problem and there is a simple explanation. Yes when you are good looking you get more smiles, they start conversations sometimes instead of the other way around etc etc. The problem is that you being good looking won't change the way females are made, YOU STILL HAVE TO LEAD THEM, YOU STILL HAVE TO MAKE THE MOVE! YOU STILL HAVE TO ASK THEM OUT THEY WONT DO IT!

You getting smiles and having them talk to you is them giving you a green light pretty much. Even so they still expect you to be a man and ask them out, lead them, make your move etc. This is a fact that doesn't change whether you are ugly, average or good looking, women won't take the lead you have to do it!

That was the biggest mistake i was making with women. Getting smiles from random girls at campus and everywhere i went, getting looks, but not doing to well in actually getting lots of dates. Then i realized that i am getting green lights but i am not acting on it.

If you are good looking like you say you are there is only 1 thing you need to do, GET YOURSELF OUT THERE! talk to them, ask them out if you get signals. You will end up with plenty of dates you won't be turned down often. Just get yourself out there don't concentrate on 1 or just getting a gf, if you get signals ask for numbers (you won't get turned down often) start calling them, then ask for dates simple as that. You'll do well trust me.

The thing is though that being good looking will get you lots of numbers and dates if you show confidence and act on the signals you get, but you still need game to seduce them and achieve your goals. The advantage you have is that they want to be seduced by you and gave you signals for you to approach them. Whether you seduce them or f____ up is up to you.

Great post man.