if you are getting Low Interest or have been LJBF'ed, this is for you

[christz]

this is to backbreaker, true as that may be you were truley never outta her mind. Always there in some type of way even if it was just on the surface. Your true depth came out when you changed yourself. given.

BUT it wasn't just that though. see in a situation like that knowing somebody for so long.. (what? 7 years?) it was never "to late" to change because there was already "some type" of connection. There was never really any "wrong" you could to do lower her probably mid range intrest level.

however when a girl truley writes you off, there's no changeing her mind. there's no attraction no sexual tension no "what if's" and defenitly no intrest level. So even after the changes are made to your personality, physiqe and all that. That girl is already gone, moved on to something better.

this girl kept you around because in her mind there was always some type of hope.. you were never wrote off. regaurdless of how much you ignored her or whatever or how much time it took you to change.

when attraction is present the long term seduction takes place. this long term seduction has been written on somewhere in the board. maybe even in the bible. it takes time sometimes a long time. But that's why you have other girls on deck.

 

[TheOnE111]

wow bro out of everything ive read in this site. This wuz very inspirational to me. Thnx man.

 

[backbreaker]

this is to backbreaker, true as that may be you were truley never outta her mind. Always there in some type of way even if it was just on the surface. Your true depth came out when you changed yourself. given.

BUT it wasn't just that though. see in a situation like that knowing somebody for so long.. (what? 7 years?) it was never "to late" to change because there was already "some type" of connection. There was never really any "wrong" you could to do lower her probably mid range intrest level.

however when a girl truley writes you off, there's no changeing her mind. there's no attraction no sexual tension no "what if's" and defenitly no intrest level. So even after the changes are made to your personality, physiqe and all that. That girl is already gone, moved on to something better.

this girl kept you around because in her mind there was always some type of hope.. you were never wrote off. regaurdless of how much you ignored her or whatever or how much time it took you to change.

when attraction is present the long term seduction takes place. this long term seduction has been written on somewhere in the board. maybe even in the bible. it takes time sometimes a long time. But that's why you have other girls on deck.

she kept me around because I would do anything she asked. This girl literarly ahd her pick of the litter in little rock. any guy she wanted she could have. I considered myself "lucky" to be her friend int he first place, and we were really friends. I met her when i was 12, we actually started to KNOW each other when I was 17.. so I've known her now for yes 7 years.

she kept me around because I was always "of use".i had money. she needed something she only had to make one phone call. and my dumb ass prided myself, even after finding this site on "always being there for her". times on a saturday I would go shopping at an expensive store, she would call me and ask could she tag along (We both love to shop), and she would see something I knew she wanted, I'd tell her to grab it. not realizing I was digging myself into a deeper hole everyday. The time her mom's business needed a corp sponger for their newspaper and I not only did it, but I gave them 5 free computers to boot to give a way... actually we got some extra business so we broke about even but that wasn't my intent, my intent was to get ass.

and it was the cat string theory at it's best. because I actually knew what was hidden under the wrapper like most guys, I should have known better. the girl is a nutcase. She has low self esteem. she is as shallow as a puddle. She's easy to talk to but very deceptive. she has the mental makeup of a 17 year old (now). no car, lives with her parents, not even her own damn cell phone. But when she went out guys would break their neck looking at her and she gobbled it all up.

it was when I actually took a site back and realized ... this girl isn't' that damn great of a girl, she's just good looking.. that she was all over me.

funny enough.. she won't admit it, but she's engaged now (she can't even tell me straight up) and if I told her to move out here with me she would be here tomorrow. now that I can have her I want nothing to do with her.


also, I used to date her best friend.. it was how I met her. Her original excuse for not dating me was that her friend would get mad. but her friend hated me so much she used to go to schools she wasn't even in and spread false rumors about me. she had a vendetta against me for what reason I don't know. I can fvck her too if i wanted now. actually, as hot as my old oneitis is, i would probably fvck this girl before her. she's more fun.

 

[christz]

To backbreaker

I have a girl in which I been best friends with for about 4 years now, we truly are friends as well. to make a long story short she cheated on her now ex fiancé with me 4 years ago, where we first met each other. it was an easy lay.. that was a red flag that I chose to ignore. This girl as well has very low self esteem probably because of how she was when she was young. Fat and unattractive. needless to say she bloomed into a knockout. and the attention she got made her into a fake AW. She was the oppisite of the "ugly duckling syndrom"

time went on and things faltered and we had a fallout.. that was about a year and a half into the relationship/friendship whatever you want to call it. needless to say I stopped talking to her for almost 2 years. which brings it up to present date.

the thing that brought me back was I found out she was engaged to be married by the guy she cheated on with me, they were on and off for hmm 6 years. she cheated on him dozens of times. each time with a different guy. the girl had bad news written all over her. but I saw through the who*re and know the person she really is. lots of love to give but is extremely picky on who to give it to.

we hung out for the first time in 2 years, and I saw no ring.. a week later I asked when's the wedding and why haven't I been invited. needless to say she broke it off with him, gave back the ring and booted him out of her house. now we're locked in a sorta limbo of "talking" but not really. its a complicated situation. She's free to do what she wants because we're not together.

See this girl loves control, she loves feminine men because when she yells at them they submit to her will. a little sex goes a long way with the men she meets. me however will get right back at her, and not play into stupid little games. I balance her so to speak since she's a spitting image of who I am.

I've put her in the LJBF category but she won't have anything of it.. so really I just talk to other women while always talking to her from time to time. we're closer than we've ever been currently and I only see it getting better. since now she's totally into talking sexual with me, and she's a lot more receptive when I hold her, Kino her touch her etc.. But my perception could be wrong. she's going on vacation with a FB of her's and my only words to it were see you when you get back and be safe. she threw out all the other words such as I'll miss you, txt me while I'm gone I'll have my phone. etc..

none of that will happen, see I feel real men don't need to say goodbye just the knowledge that she'll come back and things will continue on course. is enough for me that and she's not my only plate spinning. So really the fear of losing her is never really apparent I value her companionship more than I do her pus*y

 

[backbreaker]

why would you even value your the companionship of someone that low class?
even my old oneitis.. problems as she had.. she wasn't THAT bad. The only reason we stopped talking wasn't because of her.. I just realized I wasn't getting any and moved on. and she cared enough to let me go.. about her boyfriend at least, definatly not me.

Us becoming friends wasa more by defalt. it never was my intention, she knew it, and i knew it. over the countless hours we spent on the phone, I got to know her, she got to know me.

you hav eto be picky who you let in your life, friend and GF wise. I have no qualms about this girl being my FRIEND, but the fact is I can't control what little man thinks..and little man sees her in a skirt and he riases to the moment. I am attracted to her. Very much so. But I don't want her in my life. I don't long for her. but if the opportunity presented itself again I probably would have sex with her. that's me being honest with myself and therefor staying out of a sticky situation

 

[R19]

Has anyone had successful experience to share where they proceed to interact with the woman and confirm whether the low interest is due to the woman being on a cold streak, circumstances, timing, etc.? Their efforts caused a re-framing of the relationship more to progress on their terms. They withdrew in some sense, held ground in others, and focused on building attraction and doing all the right things to achieve the results they where looking for. They spent this time and energy because they felt that she was worth it and that they, themselves wanted it as opposed to moving on. I understand that this may not be aligned with the true ways of a DJ...

Women possess varying degrees of skill and savvy just as men do. It is possible that some throw out the LJBF as a reflex reaction or do other things that they later regret. If they regret what has happened, they may attempt to set things up to 'correct things' in the future.

I am a rookie to this forum, but the sense I have gotten from reading many posts of all sorts is a view that men can range in skill/attraction/etc. from 0-10 and women are usually up in the 7-10 range. That is, men can fcuk up at all times and do, whereas women are always on point and resolute with their actions and decisions...

Thanks

 

[Sir_Turtle]

Women range in skill and worth just as men do. However the only women you'll hear about on this forum are the 6-10 rated women, the ones below that don't really need much effort to get.. even for an AFC, those women are happy just to get any guy, forget what he's like.

Most of the women the guys on this site have trouble with are the women with high social value being chased by other guys. Those women generally know how to attract multiple guys' attention and manipulate them into giving her the validation that she wants, which most of the time doesn't include giving anything back to the guy.

SO most of the posts you'll see are about dealing with girls that are decently skilled in meeting the sexual and validation needs she has.

 

[R19]

I am a rookie to this forum, but the sense I have gotten from reading many posts of all sorts is a view that men can range in skill/attraction/etc. from 0-10 and women are usually up in the 7-10 range. That is, men can fcuk up at all times and do, whereas women are always on point and resolute with their actions and decisions...

To clarify, I was speaking about a range of 0-10 on skill with dealing with those they are interested in, ability to attract, etc. This is a 'score' that fluctuates constantly. The more skilled and true that one is, the higher one would tend to be in this rating. And just with looks, one can rate differently with every other person, depending on several factors.

I understand that women approaching 10 in physical attributes probably trade on the upper end of the 0-10 skill level as well. BUT, they are fully capable of making mistakes... perhaps they are better at hiding it or they get the default benefit of the doubt. Just seems like the bias for most posts is that the woman on the other side of the situation played her cards well most of the time, they have no regrets, etc., whereas the guy always screwed it up.

 

[moneybanks24]

backbreaker, I don't know if youre still here, but the post was very inspiring.
My question is: what material did you study during your self-improvement program (primarily related to seduction)?

thanks

 

[JerryFl08]

Amazing inspiration post, it's true, there is thousandssss of threads like these but with no details just a simple answer, with no real life situations.. I don't really know how to explain but i honestly feel more inspired by your post than by the others that have pretty much the same point. I honestly feel that my life has just changed, my whole mentality has changed just by reading this. I'm just getting off of a oneitis, and i am having somewhat of a hard time, but why am i letting it bother me? It's sad that i even still have her on my mind, don't get me wrong though i would still like to bang her, but revolving my life around her is just pathetic. i need to make my own goals, quit watchin porn and all that crap, and of course i need to focus on my education as i'm about to enter college this fall. This post was just the inspirational that i needed in my life, definately one that i would have to save, and reread whenever i feel to be in a struggle

btw i didn't get to see the picture because it said something about it being unlocatable? but i realize this post was what like around 5 years ago?. but yea i just read this and other people definately have to read this, sure it's long but your already on this forum, might as well waste your time reading this good post compared to all the others out there

 

[Buddha_Mind]

This was a good post and I identified with a lot. A little drama-full at times, but honestly there are some good lessons from all of this text. I like the idea of a 100 day "Goal List".


I myself have a LJBF situation in some ways and I'm interested to see how it'll unfold.

To self-improvement. To not being victims, but in control of ourselves and the aspects of our own lives.

 

[Want2Improve]

So what were all the things on your 100 day list?

 

[Farfetched]

Brilliant thread, best non-bible post I've seen here so far. A question to backbreaker though, just in case you still bother to see this thread:

How is your relationship with the said women today, mainly Kim? I read somewhere that you are married, just wondering to whom?