CoolProgram99 said:
I don't know if it was bad to confess my feelings, since I have been the first one to have approached her in her life,
Well you confessing your feelings to her WAS BAD. I can't think of ONE thread here on the forum in all my year and a half of being here where a guy confessed his feelings to a girl,and it turned out good.
Not
one.
I'm not saying that it's all over with,only that that's something you shouldn't have done...
even though she confessed hers first.
When she confessed her feelings to you,instead of confessing them back,you should have just asked her out. I mean if a girl tells me she likes me and has feelings for me,that's the best time to ask her out.
You shouldn't have to wonder how she feels or if she'll say yes or not because she just got finished telling you she wanted you.
CoolProgram99 said:
so she hasn't got any wuss treat nor is chased by men. However, I know I could have just keep quiet to keep the mistery, but I don't think it was all bad.
I don't like this. I understand what you're saying here. You're saying that since this girl is relatively new to the dating scene,that she's too ignorant or naive to know if a guy is giving her wussy behavior or not.
And I suppose that gives you a sense of satisfaction. You think,"Well,if I were to act AFC with her,she wouldn't know it's bad since she's never been pursued by a guy before".
You can't do that man. You can't substitue her naiveness to dating in place of you being a MAN. I see the logic in it,but it just doesn't work.
And her "I only feel attracted to you" statement is evidence that you didn't get away with it. Her FEELINGS caught on to what you were trying to pull.
If you're not a MAN with a woman,she'll know it because she'll "feel" that
something is missing,and even though this girl is new to dating,she's still emotional just like every other woman.
That's why she's conflicted. You're trying to use her naiveness to your advantage. You may be able to trick her mind,but not her EMOTIONS,and here's a PROMISE...
Her emotions WILL WIN OUT.
She WILL follow her feelings,you can bet on it.
So you need to stop thinking that it's ok for you to be AFCish with her because she doesn't know any better.
Her mind may not know any better,but her feelings do. That's why she called you and was all nervous,saying,"I don't know",telling you "this is serious",etc.
And I think you were right in what you said in one of your earlier posts. You said that you think she mistakenly used the word "attacted" when she told you that she "only feels attracted to you".
I agree with you on that.
That what I meant when I said that I had never heard a girl say that before.
I read that post over and over again,to me,there could only be two conclusions here...
1)She was lying,or...
2)She was confused about what she was saying.
And I don't think she was lying. If you want to date her,you need to stop playing around hoping you can be AFC and get away with it because she doesn't know any better,and start being a MAN with her.
You know the deal:flirt with her,tease her,tell her you like that way she looks in something,etc. Or to put it another way,be SEXUAL.
Not VULGAR or PROFANE,but sexual/romantic. And you need to HURRY because her emotions have already started alerting her that something's missing with you,and what's missing is the
SEXUALNESS.
That's what she meant when she said,"I only feel attracted to you". She misspoke. She didn't mean "attracted" as in sexual attraction. She mean affection,as in FRIENDS.
There are no shortcuts,you have to be a MAN. Stop thinking you can be an AFC with her because she lacks dating experience.
No sexual innuendos yet, and I really want a healthy relationship without things getting farther than kisses (you know, not ending with sex).
I understand what you're saying here,but you can use innuendos WITHOUT leading to sex. Just use them to generate the attraction.
The attraction is what's missing on her part. That's what she was trying to tell you when she misspoke.
If you keep going the way you're going,you're friendzone bound.