i keep beating myself up.

Packers2010

Master Don Juan
Joined
Oct 21, 2010
Messages
1,174
Reaction score
31
Age
34
Location
The Wild Wigga From the West
lately i haven't been doing well in the game. i haven't got laid u ages and i am started to feel it more and more.

i know i just need to approach more an just trust that it will all work out if i just stick to it. but it's so hard when you only approach like 2 sets in 2 weeks.

take last night for instance, i went out with a bunch of friends. one of the girls who car out was single. so we went to this club and we all danced and stuff, i didn't get let in to the club. i was "apparently too drunk and had to wait 30 mins." when i get in the club and meet up with my friends. she was dancing with on of the guys we came out with, they was pretty much having a full make out sess. i was like cool, ( i didn't care i wasn't much into the her only other from the fact that i'm horny as **** and i need to get laid ASAP. yeah that's where my mind is at right now.)

so we all just kept dancing ( cos thats what you do in a club i guess. lol) then she starts kissing one of her friends girl friends who sh brought out.( which was cool to see.)

later on she started grinding up on me (which like never happens to me so i was like.. yay.. chodes gunna chode huh?) then she like pulled me in close. i'm not sure if she wanted me to kiss her.. but i was totally uncalibrated and said something stupid like.. "what?" because i thought she wanted me to talk to her. so then she realized this and let go of me. witch is to be expected. though i'm pretty sure the main reason why i did that was because:

A) I saw her kissing her guy friend and i though that I shouldn't kiss her becuse it would **** up the " group dynamic"

B) my friend saw what was going on and was trying to tell me to stop it. ( he is a GOOD FRIEND of mine. not some guy who wound amog me. plus me knew the guy who was kissing her. so i think he was setting up for him even though he didn't take her home in the end lol)

c) i'm just tottally didn't expect it to happen and i was uncalibrated. ( i know it is this 95% though A and B had slight bearings on it too. )


to you guys that probably nothing. but to me it was a pretty big deal. i think i am focusing on what i DON'T have when i should just focus on HAVING A GOOD TIME. but i never do.

funny story is, i trolled her on facebook when i got home. ( had no numbers to drunk text.) so i sent her the message " hey thanks for not grinding on me too much i would hav got a boner and it would have been embarrassing. :p ( IE: the chodiest message of all time) i then added her to facebook to see she has a kid. so. nothing is really won or lost her.. plus she is a cool person to bring out so hey maybe i might see her again.


after all this rambling ( thanks for reading it all), what should I focus on? and how do i stop making myself feel so ****ty? i mean, i'm not getting ANYWHERE. sure i feel a little more confident. but that's behind the scenes so to speak, it's not when i'm with a girl.
 

JohnChops

Master Don Juan
Joined
Mar 9, 2012
Messages
2,762
Reaction score
492
Location
No more keyboard jockeying . Action is the place.
Whats up Packers. I think you need to work on yourself mentally. Feel good mentally. Get in the mindset of going out and having a good time , to tell yourself im going to have a killer night! And good things always happen man. Girls always seem to do that in the club, they want to hook up with every god damn person alive! Nature is nature i suppose.

I would just say why not do this. Unplug from everything for awhile, hit the books, work on your hobbies, and hit the gym. Just simply forget about girls for the time being until you are fortified.Its what I did and now i have a good time regardless.

Hope this helps brotha
 

Harry Wilmington

Master Don Juan
Joined
Aug 19, 2012
Messages
1,201
Reaction score
204
You have a lot of posts up on this site - way more than I do - so the fact that you're asking this question tells me you've now hit the point where you've been on here for a while, have learned all these different techniques on how to get girls, and your brain is having a clash between the old version of yourself (i.e. the things you used to do) and the emerging version of yourself (i.e. doing the new things you've learned).

When this occurs, things like this happen and emotions such as the ones you've expressed start to arise. On one hand, you feel somewhat successful in being able to execute the new stuff you've learned; and yet, when it's time to make the all-important final move to get the girl to choose you, you go back to how you originally acted and chase the girl away.

For example: the girl started grinding on you, and when she pulled you close you had an opportunity to kiss her. That's the "new game" working. But then, because her move was unpredicted, you didn't know how to react to it, and reverted back to your "old game" of giving yourself an excuse as to why you couldn't kiss her.

All this means, honestly, is that you're halfway towards becoming the new version of yourself who won't be thrown off by these things. Unfortunately, it's a necessary thing that has to happen, and will probably happen again. Eventually, though, you'll get so tired of your old ways getting in the way of your new ways that you'll stop thinking so hard about it and just go for it when the opportunity arises. THAT'S when you'll be able to stop frustrating yourself - right now, your old self is c0ckblocking your new self, but it won't last forever IF you're willing to break old habits.
 

Three

Don Juan
Joined
Oct 6, 2010
Messages
153
Reaction score
19
Location
Midwest
Harry - That's a great assessment of what's going on with OP. However, I have to point out that he mentions this chick sucking face with another dude just before and then another chick. The chick wouldn't bother me so much, but I might be slightly old-fashioned or something and I wouldn't be so keen on tongue wrestling with this chick right after she was doing that with another guy. Kinda gross...
 

Kbomb

Senior Don Juan
Joined
Aug 30, 2012
Messages
346
Reaction score
15
Packers2010 said:
lately i haven't been doing well in the game. i haven't got laid u ages and i am started to feel it more and more.

i know i just need to approach more an just trust that it will all work out if i just stick to it. but it's so hard when you only approach like 2 sets in 2 weeks.

take last night for instance, i went out with a bunch of friends. one of the girls who car out was single. so we went to this club and we all danced and stuff, i didn't get let in to the club. i was "apparently too drunk and had to wait 30 mins." when i get in the club and meet up with my friends. she was dancing with on of the guys we came out with, they was pretty much having a full make out sess. i was like cool, ( i didn't care i wasn't much into the her only other from the fact that i'm horny as **** and i need to get laid ASAP. yeah that's where my mind is at right now.)

so we all just kept dancing ( cos thats what you do in a club i guess. lol) then she starts kissing one of her friends girl friends who sh brought out.( which was cool to see.)

later on she started grinding up on me (which like never happens to me so i was like.. yay.. chodes gunna chode huh?) then she like pulled me in close. i'm not sure if she wanted me to kiss her.. but i was totally uncalibrated and said something stupid like.. "what?" because i thought she wanted me to talk to her. so then she realized this and let go of me. witch is to be expected. though i'm pretty sure the main reason why i did that was because:

A) I saw her kissing her guy friend and i though that I shouldn't kiss her becuse it would **** up the " group dynamic"

B) my friend saw what was going on and was trying to tell me to stop it. ( he is a GOOD FRIEND of mine. not some guy who wound amog me. plus me knew the guy who was kissing her. so i think he was setting up for him even though he didn't take her home in the end lol)

c) i'm just tottally didn't expect it to happen and i was uncalibrated. ( i know it is this 95% though A and B had slight bearings on it too. )


to you guys that probably nothing. but to me it was a pretty big deal. i think i am focusing on what i DON'T have when i should just focus on HAVING A GOOD TIME. but i never do.

funny story is, i trolled her on facebook when i got home. ( had no numbers to drunk text.) so i sent her the message " hey thanks for not grinding on me too much i would hav got a boner and it would have been embarrassing. :p ( IE: the chodiest message of all time) i then added her to facebook to see she has a kid. so. nothing is really won or lost her.. plus she is a cool person to bring out so hey maybe i might see her again.


after all this rambling ( thanks for reading it all), what should I focus on? and how do i stop making myself feel so ****ty? i mean, i'm not getting ANYWHERE. sure i feel a little more confident. but that's behind the scenes so to speak, it's not when i'm with a girl.
You need to relax. None of this is important. You are the only thing that is important. You sound exactly like me 7 years ago. You need to get out of your head. Relax and ENJOY THE RIDE. This is your life. All of it. There is no other life to be had. So crack a smile and watch the world around you as a man who only sees the good and the funny.
 

If you want to talk, talk to your friends. If you want a girl to like you, listen to her, ask questions, and act like you are on the edge of your seat.

Quote taken from The SoSuave Guide to Women and Dating, which you can read for FREE.

Bible_Belt

Master Don Juan
Joined
Jul 27, 2005
Messages
17,104
Reaction score
5,735
Age
48
Location
midwestern cow field 40
Relax and ENJOY THE RIDE.

I went to the Packers v Rams NFL game last weekend in St Louis. I think there were more Packers fans at the game. The were definitely enjoying the ride. Every hot girl I saw had a Packers jersey on.
 

DonJuanabe

Master Don Juan
Joined
Jan 20, 2012
Messages
592
Reaction score
22
How about you not focus on anything at all. Your problem is you are focusing on anything and everything you possibly can.
 

The Gambler

Senior Don Juan
Joined
Aug 8, 2012
Messages
375
Reaction score
11
flashpoint said:
not to get drunk.
BINGO. I was wondering how long it would take for someone to figure this out. If you're too drunk to get inside a club, chances are you ain't gonna be in the game at all, much less at the top of it.

I'm not preaching against the evils of alcohol here, but am just mentioning what we all have seen many, many times while out on the town. Decide what your priority for the night is gonna be -- Guinness or Gina (NEW CATCHPHRASE -- Woooohoooo!)

The Gambler
 

Packers2010

Master Don Juan
Joined
Oct 21, 2010
Messages
1,174
Reaction score
31
Age
34
Location
The Wild Wigga From the West
Harry Wilmington said:
You have a lot of posts up on this site - way more than I do - so the fact that you're asking this question tells me you've now hit the point where you've been on here for a while, have learned all these different techniques on how to get girls, and your brain is having a clash between the old version of yourself (i.e. the things you used to do) and the emerging version of yourself (i.e. doing the new things you've learned).

When this occurs, things like this happen and emotions such as the ones you've expressed start to arise. On one hand, you feel somewhat successful in being able to execute the new stuff you've learned; and yet, when it's time to make the all-important final move to get the girl to choose you, you go back to how you originally acted and chase the girl away.

For example: the girl started grinding on you, and when she pulled you close you had an opportunity to kiss her. That's the "new game" working. But then, because her move was unpredicted, you didn't know how to react to it, and reverted back to your "old game" of giving yourself an excuse as to why you couldn't kiss her.

All this means, honestly, is that you're halfway towards becoming the new version of yourself who won't be thrown off by these things. Unfortunately, it's a necessary thing that has to happen, and will probably happen again. Eventually, though, you'll get so tired of your old ways getting in the way of your new ways that you'll stop thinking so hard about it and just go for it when the opportunity arises. THAT'S when you'll be able to stop frustrating yourself - right now, your old self is c0ckblocking your new self, but it won't last forever IF you're willing to break old habits.


this is so on the money on how i feel now its so intense. thanks for posting it man
 

Packers2010

Master Don Juan
Joined
Oct 21, 2010
Messages
1,174
Reaction score
31
Age
34
Location
The Wild Wigga From the West
Kbomb said:
You need to relax. None of this is important. You are the only thing that is important. You sound exactly like me 7 years ago. You need to get out of your head. Relax and ENJOY THE RIDE. This is your life. All of it. There is no other life to be had. So crack a smile and watch the world around you as a man who only sees the good and the funny.
thanks for the advice i just saved this in a texxt doc and i am going to print it out and put it up on my wall.
 

Packers2010

Master Don Juan
Joined
Oct 21, 2010
Messages
1,174
Reaction score
31
Age
34
Location
The Wild Wigga From the West
thanks for the help guys. i'm going to go try go out tonight because a wing friend of mine wants to go out.

i'm just going to try focus on just going out.. if anything appends ( i don't just blow 10 sets in a row or something) i'll do a fr
 

marmel75

Master Don Juan
Joined
Jan 4, 2012
Messages
7,231
Reaction score
5,636
Yo...I am going to tell you to follow NN's advice on POF/OKC/hotornot...

I have pulled 30+ numbers in under 3 weeks(another 7 today), and have 2 chicks email ME basically telling me they want to fvck. I've had 3 snl's over this time on first dates, and have another 5 or 6 chicks I should b getting numbers from tomorrow...I literally have women emailing or texting me back because I haven't contacted them yet, asking if I lost interest.

I have no time to even talk to all these women, so as soon as I get a new number, the lowest chick is getting put on the backburner...all these girls are 7+, and I make them send me a "right now" pic within the first few msgs...some are single mom with kids, I don't care...I'm just trying to fvck, not marry them...those seem to be the thirstiest ones...

Follow his advice and you will have more pvssy than u can fvck, trust me. Don't worry about relationships, just fvck them...these chicks are all thirsty regardless of what their profiles say
......

If you can't get laid there I don't know what to tell you...just accept it I guess..that's how easy it is.
 

Packers2010

Master Don Juan
Joined
Oct 21, 2010
Messages
1,174
Reaction score
31
Age
34
Location
The Wild Wigga From the West
marmel75 said:
Yo...I am going to tell you to follow NN's advice on POF/OKC/hotornot...

I have pulled 30+ numbers in under 3 weeks(another 7 today), and have 2 chicks email ME basically telling me they want to fvck. I've had 3 snl's over this time on first dates, and have another 5 or 6 chicks I should b getting numbers from tomorrow...I literally have women emailing or texting me back because I haven't contacted them yet, asking if I lost interest.

I have no time to even talk to all these women, so as soon as I get a new number, the lowest chick is getting put on the backburner...all these girls are 7+, and I make them send me a "right now" pic within the first few msgs...some are single mom with kids, I don't care...I'm just trying to fvck, not marry them...those seem to be the thirstiest ones...

Follow his advice and you will have more pvssy than u can fvck, trust me. Don't worry about relationships, just fvck them...these chicks are all thirsty regardless of what their profiles say
......

If you can't get laid there I don't know what to tell you...just accept it I guess..that's how easy it is.

i set up an okc profile last night.. i don't know why i was bored.. maybe i will go take a look at his work..

i know you CAN get laid on there ( all the girls are desperate that's why they are on there) it mostly never works for me.. due to the face i need to get better pictures and just never did.. plus i'm not too much in shape either.. witch doesn't help on there.


Edit: just checked my profile on ock.. told me 9 girls check my profile.. ( i messaged all the online girls last night.. was pretty horny.. ) did not get one message.. well i did get one.. but the girl told me i was too young for her.. i know it's the pictures has to be.
 

marmel75

Master Don Juan
Joined
Jan 4, 2012
Messages
7,231
Reaction score
5,636
Packers2010 said:
i set up an okc profile last night.. i don't know why i was bored.. maybe i will go take a look at his work..

i know you CAN get laid on there ( all the girls are desperate that's why they are on there) it mostly never works for me.. due to the face i need to get better pictures and just never did.. plus i'm not too much in shape either.. witch doesn't help on there.


Edit: just checked my profile on ock.. told me 9 girls check my profile.. ( i messaged all the online girls last night.. was pretty horny.. ) did not get one message.. well i did get one.. but the girl told me i was too young for her.. i know it's the pictures has to be.
I would get in shape...its not just online where its hurting you, trust me.

Great personalities are fine, but if the girl isn't sexually attracted to you, its friendzone time...

and don't just start winging it, do EXACTLY what he says. Already have 3 numbers this morning in my inbox from messages I sent last night...
 
Top