I just Fvcking SNAPPED!

[TheEdgeOf]

Alright, first read this. http://www.sosuave.net/forum/showthread.php?t=144414

The girl in that thread has always been a jackass to me. The only reason I put up with it is because I was friends with her friends. So she ended up confronting me about it on msn. At first I was trying to be nice to her and get things straightened out. Then after realizing that she genuinely being a ***** to me and that she wasn't just joking around, I still tried to be nice about it. I said some really gay AFC **** that I am NOT proud of. At All. Then, she continued pushing her point and making me feel bad about myself. trying to make me feel that she was right.

But then, my friends, something happened in me. Something I have you to thank for. My inner DJ Unleashed itself. My Inner DJ Would Never Let Me Take This Kind Of **** From ANYONE! I Snapped! My Inner DJ Shot The AFC In Me In The Head And Just Took Control.

I said this;

Dude, what the **** is that **** I just wrote? Alright Jenn, I'm going to tell you what I should have said a long time ago. None of this gay ***** BULL****! I never wanted trouble with you. All I wanted to do was be your friend, but now I realize that you aren't worth the ****ing effort. Hey, maybe I am a jackass and maybe I do need to shut the **** up sometimes. But if I do shut up, then I'll be the one to ****ing say when. I might not be the best guy around, but I like who I am, and I'm not going to change it for ANYONE.

I've never had a problem with you, alright. You're the one who's had a problem with me for whatever ****ing reason, it's YOUR problem, not mine.

Now I've tried to be nice to you for the past few months for... some ****ing reason, but you've already made up your mind about me and no matter what I do, you're still going to think I'm annoying. So you know what. I will leave you, and I won't give it a second thought because Jenn, in my eyes, you are a *****.

If you ever realize that I'm not such a bad guy, then try talking to me, but don't expect me to still care.

Holy crap I feel good right now. Maybe That Wasn't Very smooth of me, but My Inner DJ will not let me take **** from anyone. I have fvcking pride in who I am. I will not let people make me feel like I am anything other than Amazing. I should not have let it continue as long as it did. Now my mistake is rectified. There's a very high chance that I've just killed my friendship with that girl, but I did not end it on my knees. I stand tall and proud of who I am, whether or not I am wrong in doing so.

 

[Mavrick]

What you did was not Don Juan. It would have been Don Juan of you to not react in any way what so ever and letting it go like I told you to. You should have just let it go.

You say "Thank you" and you never return, unless, she has made a valiant effort to be your friend.

A Don Juan does not swear at people, especially not at his friends. You have to be a friend first before anyone can be your friend. If she/he is mad at you, they want to be left alone. They don't need to be antagonized. You let go of people who don't find value in you. You don't argue with them. You just move on to people that know you have value.

It's obvious that this girl was more than a friend to you, and your ego got the best of you. You have nothing to prove to anyone.

 

[Gubby]

I say do whatever feels right. If you do wrong, you can work that out in your own time.

 

[guru1000]

You have shown her, she has control over your emotions.

She knows now she can pull your strings like a puppet.

You have SHOWN your cards.

Next time, if you want to make a STATEMENT; Walk Away.

No explanations, no arguing. Just walk away.

 

[TheEdgeOf]

Mav, I know what I did wasn't very DJ-like. But I do have ****ing standards, and she disrespected me. I know that the Don Jaun way would have been to just let it go... But I couldn't. I'm just not strong enough yet. Maybe one Day I will be, but now... Now, I think that I...

-She fvcking deserved it. Damn it. I know I shouldn't have done that, but... well... wouldn't letting her disrespect me make me less like a DJ?

I'm confused. I know I need to have respect for myself to be a true DJ, but how can I do that If I let people disrespect me like that?

(I will admit though, it did feel good to let her know what I was thinking, but I also kind of felt bad about what I said)

 

[Real_Deal]

Hey maybe Mavrick is right and you should have used less words. The important thing is that you said no to the BS. As long as you don't run back tomorrow trying to get back with someone who's not worth it then it's okay.

Next time don't put yourself in the position to be mad enough for all that to be justified.

 

[leftForDeadPhoenix]

According to what I've read on this site, a DJ reacts to female bs with indifference. That means you don't lose your cool, because females ain't worth your blood pressure going up. I know of this dude who is like the biggest literal pimp I've ever met. He never has hit a woman, and never even raises his voice. He told me he has never had to yell at a woman. I'm not sure what his secret is, but this guy is in so much control over his life and emotions that he gets respect without much effort.

 

[TheEdgeOf]

So... What do I do now that I've flown off the handle like that?

 

[guru1000]

You do NOTHING.

You continue with your life and move on.

Most importantly, NEVER give away your CONTROL by snapping again.

Only the worthy earn your attention.

Withdraw your attention from the unworthy.

 

[j0n024]

I guess I'll be the on with a different view here since everyone here is thinking the same thing.

I say you did a good thing here by telling her your through being pushed around by some women and that you dont want to associate with her anymore if she keeps treating you like this. I would have done the same thing if I was in your position ....just not with such a long speech lol. You did good, I dont know if your a RAFC or a full blown DJ but that took guts and you have my support for that and I think that is your first step toward being a man.

I know I might be flamed for what I say but fvkc it ...it's trivial to flame someone for their opinion, you did good so good job there buddy.

NOW you can listen to these guys about not blowing up in some girls face, you got it out of your system and are on the path so now you should read the bible more and learn that YOUR in control of yourself and yourself alone.

Good job

 

[iqqi]

So... What do I do now that I've flown off the handle like that?

Reply back and say "sike. did that scare you?"

Then never speak to her again.

 

[j0n024]

LOL......with replys like that I still havent figured out how you got so much "Karma," lol guess it does help everywhere you go to have a vagina lol.

PS: I only say this because I just saw that thread about the karma in "Anything Else," and it shocked me to see that people on here actually care about there green boxes.....lol.

 

[Rhoto]

Suggestion to Moderators - Merge threads.

 

[young_gun]

You over-reacted.

You should have talked to her in a calm manner and asked her what was going on. By acting the way you did, you've basically shown her that she has control over your emotions.

If she were really interested in you, she would have seen your indifference and came to you and apologized for being shady to you. But you screwed it up by acting like an over-emotional jackass. What you did was AFC, not DJ.

I've been taking martial arts classes lately and can relate a lot of it to interactions with women. If you're nervous and tense, you can't perform nearly as well as you'd like to. If you try to force something that isn't there, you make yourself vulnerable and open yourself up for an attack. If you throw out too much energy, your opponent can take that and use it against you. This is EXACTLY what's going on in your situation.

Forget about her and move on.

 

[Jitterbug]

Getting mad at women is just wasting time in your life. They give us so much to get angry about.

What you did was very AFC. It's just at the other extreme. An AFC reacts to a girl testing his control of his own emotions by either sucking up to her (this is more common) or lashing out at her. A DJ will find that amusing, have a good laugh and walk away from her BS, withdrawing his attention in the process.

Now that you've fvcked up big time, like guru said, do nothing and just move on. Chalk it up as a learning experience.

Next time a girl does that to you, talk to her in a calm manner like a parent or a teacher would lecture a naughty child. Tell her she's crossed the line. The calmer you are, the more nervous and reactive she will be, and she will apologize.

 

[Michele l'Arcangelo]

do what iqqi said, that's pretty funny.

anyways what did she say afterwards?

 

[taiyuu_otoko]

you did the right thing. forget what all the KJ's here say. it is a matter of being assertive and in control of your emotions. You can't get there overnight, it takes time and experience. next time you'll see BS coming sooner, and deal with it with less drama, next time better, next time better. You gotta crawl before you can walk, and you gotta walk before you can run. Good job. You are moving in the right direction. forget about what to do next. Just know that you are now capable of killing BS when it shows up. next time you will be better.

 

[ARrocket]

Sorry about the advice I gave in the last thread....I assumed you two were close friends.

I think what you did was fine, but it would have looked better without all of the profanity in it. But as for what you do now, just continue about your life. Don't be rude towards her, just indifferent. Don't let her know it has affected you...and maybe make yourself tighter with your mutual friends. If that's what you want, of course....

 

[Mavrick]

Mav, I know what I did wasn't very DJ-like. But I do have ****ing standards, and she disrespected me. I know that the Don Jaun way would have been to just let it go... But I couldn't. I'm just not strong enough yet. Maybe one Day I will be, but now... Now, I think that I...

-She fvcking deserved it. Damn it. I know I shouldn't have done that, but... well... wouldn't letting her disrespect me make me less like a DJ?

I'm confused. I know I need to have respect for myself to be a true DJ, but how can I do that If I let people disrespect me like that?

(I will admit though, it did feel good to let her know what I was thinking, but I also kind of felt bad about what I said)

It's not really about being strong, but having an actual understanding of how the human psyche works. If you would have just been indifferent and walked away (shrugged your shoulders and said "ok"), it would have gotten to her more that getting mad would ever have. She probably would have been apologizing to you in the end.

If you get mad at someone because they are mad at you, they know they have total control in the situation. If it really didn't bother you, and you really knew who you were and what your standards were, you would have had no issues with cutting her lose. It's very simple really, especially when you don't depend on others for your own validation and happiness. What she thinks of you does not make you who you are. It just doesn't.

Learn who you are and learn to love that person.

 

[Al Moh.]

You know, I don't think it's that much about being DJ-like or AFC-like, it's about personal progress. People are right: You could have done better. But you also could have done worse. You should take this as a learning experience but at the same time as a motivation. An AFC would just go apologize until she treats him nicely again. So if you would have done something like that before and now you aren't doing this anymore, you're on the right track. You just have to realize that you can't stop there. By saying it was "DJ-like" to get mad at her, it sounded like this would be the right reaction also for the future. But it's not.