I don't really have a plan right now...

[Pierce Manhammer]

So "mentoring" is now confirming the problem I'm asking for advice with, while doing so in an entertaining way to earn internet points from other people, do I have that right?

Like you guys can stop replying now, it's clear that the few people that actually wanted to offer some advice have already done so, and now it's just a circle jerk of making fun of my situation, why? Because I said I can get girls despite my financial situation? That wasn't a brag, that was simply stating a fact, but I guess it's fun for some of you to try and knock me down a peg because you see that as arrogance or something. I don't know, I don't care, but it's not useful so I don't know why you're here.

Oh, the melodrama! You toss your personal life onto the internet's judgment table, then act shocked when people serve up a side of snark? Please. You opened the door by mentioning your irresistible charm and questionable life choices. What did you expect, a standing ovation?

You say you're not bragging about your skills with the ladies, just "stating a fact." Well, we're also just "stating facts" about the situation you've presented. If you can't take the heat, maybe it's time to exit the kitchen—or, in your case, Mom's basement. Does mommy wash your CK skivvies too?

Would you like me to mentor you? Accurate advice often comes with a reality check. If you can't handle some jesting from strangers on the internet, you should rethink how well you're doing in life's grand game.

 

[Gamisch]

You can leave now. Your solution is essentially "lul just werk", followed by a bunch of talk about how essentially I'm a massive failure, as is my dad, and how unfortunate for my mom (btw my brother isn't living at home, you seem to keep thinking that).

That's not useful, please go elsewhere.

My solution is that you man the F up , stop complaining and stop chasing women as you are basically passed the stage of chasing women without being able to facilitate the women you actually catch..

My solution is a 2 year hiatus, after which you'll come back stronger at 32, with money on the bank, a crib /place of your own and some good habits /routines

My solution is that you learn to become a man whose less argumentative and knows how and when to pick his battles, who is realistic about his possibilities and opportunities and knows when to stfu.

My solution is that you learn how to carry yourself, how to cook,.clean ,run a household like a MAN, know how to fix shyte around the house like plumbing, electricity, carpentry, gardening, painting, sowing, cleaning, cleaning CLEANING, ironing,organizing ect you know..things that women will judge you on?


But hey. You tell me how I need to adress you. As you apparently got some to teach me. About WHAT I wonder.. by age 30 I've lived together with 3 women already and i was a father already.

So yeah, why would you sit back ,shut up be grateful ,take notes and OPERATE accordingly??

You can leave now. Your solution is essentially "lul just werk", followed by a bunch of talk about how essentially I'm a massive failure, as is my dad, and how unfortunate for my mom (btw my brother isn't living at home, you seem to keep thinking that).

That's not useful, please go elsewhere.

thats a good tldr...I am happy to notice you AT LEAST read every damm word i wrote!! Yeah baby!!

 

[BPH]

What do you think is useful my brother?

Teach me how to communicate better.

The irony from whatever your answer will ne is that its your own answer. My answer should at least considered, if i were you I'd seriously read it twice and then two more times..

But again. Lets keep it kumbaya. What's a better way to approach you? Lets make it a circle jerk that specifically satisfies YOu!!!(Dont forget YOU are the one looking for answers not me!!)

I came here asking for practical advice that I could act on. I want to hear from people who have failed over and over and over again and ask them how they came to find what worked. I thought I was doing the thing I would be doing long-term multiple times now...

I worked at a mortgage lender for a year and left that job when I realized it was a "churn-n-burn" business that was constantly laying people off. I was introduced to workplace politics and hated working the hours I had to, which is why I was looking for an avenue where I didn't have to do that to find financial success.

Then with the modeling, I spent YEARS getting in top shape down to the exact measurements that these agencies wanted me at...I had an exclusive 18-month contract with BSG in New York that got me ZERO work in that time...constantly checking in with my manager, and having shoots with multiple photographers to add to my portfolio, not only did nothing come of that, but I wouldn't do anything with anybody else. Then when I was released from that I went with a new manager who was more in the acting sphere and after working with him for 2 more years I finally got my skills to a point where I was getting callbacks - but then I couldn't be represented because they required full COVID vaccination and booster updates.

And now with ERC being put on moratorium, I'm forced to pivot once again.

So I come here asking how the people who DID find financial success ended up settling on what that thing is, because I thought I found it multiple times now, and multiple times now I've been wrong.

I understand my situation sucks, but the advice some of you guys are giving is essentially rubbing in how bad my situation is without anything actionable beyond "work more".

Oh, the melodrama! You toss your personal life onto the internet's judgment table, then act shocked when people serve up a side of snark? Please. You opened the door by mentioning your irresistible charm and questionable life choices. What did you expect, a standing ovation?

You say you're not bragging about your skills with the ladies, just "stating a fact." Well, we're also just "stating facts" about the situation you've presented. If you can't take the heat, maybe it's time to exit the kitchen—or, in your case, Mom's basement. Does mommy wash your CK skivvies too?

Would you like me to mentor you? Accurate advice often comes with a reality check. If you can't handle some jesting from strangers on the internet, you should rethink how well you're doing in life's grand game.

I didn't come here asking to be judged, I came asking for solutions to a problem. I didn't say I have "irresistible charm", just that I AM successful with women even though I'm poor. I don't know how that's arrogant and I didn't expect any "that-a-boy's", just a statement on how I'm happy with most other aspects of your life.

As for your "mentorship", let me frame this in a way you can (hopefully) understand it...what you've done is take my situation, exaggerate it, and paint this picture in a way that would be funny to others through this vivid retelling of how I must be as a person.

That would be like a fat person coming to a personal trainer, and having that trainer describe how s****y all their life decisions up to that point have been, how lowly they are as a human being, and sarcastically telling them how their problems don't exist because "at least you have food". THAT is your so-called "mentorship".

You're not giving tough love, you're just being an a**hole. I don't have a problem with criticism or being wrong, but you're the kind of person who likes to remind people how wrong they are, constantly providing "I told you so's". And for what? Reaction points on a pickup forum? You can f*** off with that false altruism.

 

[BPH]

About WHAT I wonder.. by age 30 I've lived together with 3 women already and i was a father already.

I don't know why you list this like it's a positive, but ok.

So yeah, why would you sit back ,shut up be grateful ,take notes and OPERATE accordingly??

I am grateful, to the people who offered specific advice that worked for them.

 

[Pierce Manhammer]

I didn't come here asking to be judged, I came asking for solutions to a problem. I didn't say I have "irresistible charm", just that I AM successful with women even though I'm poor. I don't know how that's arrogant and I didn't expect any "that-a-boy's", just a statement on how I'm happy with most other aspects of your life.

As for your "mentorship", let me frame this in a way you can (hopefully) understand it...what you've done is take my situation, exaggerate it, and paint this picture in a way that would be funny to others through this vivid retelling of how I must be as a person.

That would be like a fat person coming to a personal trainer, and having that trainer describe how s****y all their life decisions up to that point have been, how lowly they are as a human being, and sarcastically telling them how their problems don't exist because "at least you have food". THAT is your so-called "mentorship".

You're not giving tough love, you're just being an a**hole. I don't have a problem with criticism or being wrong, but you're the kind of person who likes to remind people how wrong they are, constantly providing "I told you so's". And for what? Reaction points on a pickup forum? You can f*** off with that false altruism.

Well, look who's throwing a hissy fit. DAW, get your CKs in a bunch? Did mommy not use enough fabric softeners to caress your non-existent gonads? CLASSIC MILLENIAL. Let's be clear: If you toss your life situation into the public domain, asking for advice, you've got to be prepared for all types of responses, not just the ones that pad your ego. That's how advice forums work, buddy.

Sure, you say you're "successful with women," as if that's some golden ticket to make your other life choices immune from scrutiny. But hey, congrats on that singular achievement; your mother must be proud.

You claim you're seeking mentorship. True mentorship often includes a hard look in the mirror—something you seem averse to, given your reactions here. And your analogy about a personal trainer? A decent trainer will, in fact, call out unhealthy habits while helping to correct them. They don't just pat you on the back and say, "Keep eating those doughnuts; you're doing great!"

So, you can either handle the tough love, recalibrate, and maybe get something out of this interaction, or you can continue to dismiss it as mere a**holery. Your call. But either way, if you can't handle the jabs, maybe public forums aren't where you seek life advice. You're too thin-skinned, grow a pair.

When bringing up my successful, college-aged son, I frequently took an approach that his mother didn't always get, labeling it as "too harsh." But this is how genuine masculinity communicates—through playful ribbing and, yes, even some outright shaming at times. It's part of shaping a young man.

This might explain why women in your age group often lament the absence of "real men" and gravitate toward older men—they're searching for the masculinity that seems largely lacking in your generation.

 

[BPH]

Well, look who's throwing a hissy fit. DAW, get your CKs in a bunch? Did mommy not use enough fabric softeners to caress your non-existent gonads? CLASSIC MILLENIAL. Let's be clear: If you toss your life situation into the public domain, asking for advice, you've got to be prepared for all types of responses, not just the ones that pad your ego. That's how advice forums work, buddy.

Sure, you say you're "successful with women," as if that's some golden ticket to make your other life choices immune from scrutiny. But hey, congrats on that singular achievement; your mother must be proud.

You claim you're seeking mentorship. True mentorship often includes a hard look in the mirror—something you seem averse to, given your reactions here. And your analogy about a personal trainer? A decent trainer will, in fact, call out unhealthy habits while helping to correct them. They don't just pat you on the back and say, "Keep eating those doughnuts; you're doing great!"

So, you can either handle the tough love, recalibrate, and maybe get something out of this interaction, or you can continue to dismiss it as mere a**holery. Your call. But either way, if you can't handle the jabs, maybe public forums aren't the place for you to seek life advice. You're too thin-skinned, grow a pair.

You done? You can go now as well.

 

[Pierce Manhammer]

You done? You can go now as well.

Dear Benign Prostatic Hyperplasia:
I was going to let you be in your little bubble of self-pity, but given your latest above, I may weigh in on every post you make with my erudite knowledge to help you more, at least for a while.

p.s. you argue like a girl, but I don't think you're incorrigible, just a little misguided. Hugzzzz

 

[kavi]

I think in the future very few people are going to be able to start businesses and be self employed. This is because the market becomes more and more efficient the average guy is competing with already established small businesses or partnerships etc. Back in the old days an individual could make it on his own more easily.

People are still living by the old rules but you are no longer in that world.

 

[Stoic]

My financial situation doesn't disqualify me from being successful with women...I don't know if you've read any of my stuff but I've been with a lot of very attractive women. I'm happy with who I am overall, the only thing I'm disappointed with is my lack of financial success at this point in my life.

But if you and @All_Kindz_Of_Gainz want to just go back and forth high-fiving each other you can go somewhere else to do it. As I've mentioned before, I'm not opposed to making sacrifices; I sacrificed a lot of time, money, and effort doing the things I mentioned above...



Well, the big ones were the modeling/acting and the ERC. I've dealt with failures in each and invested a lot of time, money, and effort when it came to those. But if I can't be represented due to my unwillingness to get the jab, or can't get paid for any businesses I help for another year...well then I don't think it's worth pouring more into each of those ventures if I can't get a return on anything.

I probably haven't exhausted ALL of these, but I haven't seen a return on any of them for a long enough time that I came to the conclusion that I'm either s*** at it, or could likely be putting that time into something more profitable.



Mind if I ask you what you did? Specifically, whether the work you did as an employee helped build a skillset that allowed you to be self-employed and successful? Was it in the same industry?

So I’m not sure how helpful this will be but my career track has not been so traditional and some ups and downs to get me where I am now.

1. 4 years enlisted Air Force in intelligence field
2. Then went and got Bachelors degree in business
3. Tried real estate with lack luster results
4. Then worked in a storage facility making $9 per hour
5. Then worked sears loss prevention making $7 an hour
6. Reconnected with a friend (so important to build and maintain contacts) who got me back into the Defense Industry bc of my time in the military but was working really hard for only about $42k yearly at mid 20s or so. Did that for 3 years.
7. Then left that company and did the same thing after I learned the job and set my own shingle and started doing it as a self employed person. I’ve don’t that from maybe 27 to age 40 and am now earning pretty big dollars.

I say all of that because I really didn’t get things In gear until about age 30. Really. So my point is you can do it too. 30 is not too old. Your post resonated with me because I too looked for easier shortcuts to make money but could never sustain it. I flipped two houses. I flipped cars for money. I day traded and lost money. Once I came up with a reasonable game plan and executed, my financial life came together.

Decide what you really want to do, what you are good at or could become good at with effort and then go after it. But again, accept the fact that it will take some time. Where do you want to be at 35? In five years, you could be killing it.

At 30, really very few options are off the table.

I didn’t mean to be preachy or ramble so much but just wanted to encourage you that you can do this. It sounds like you have the ambition.

Good luck brother

 

[BPH]

So I’m not sure how helpful this will be but my career track has not been so traditional and some ups and downs to get me where I am now.

1. 4 years enlisted Air Force in intelligence field
2. Then went and got Bachelors degree in business
3. Tried real estate with lack luster results
4. Then worked in a storage facility making $9 per hour
5. Then worked sears loss prevention making $7 an hour
6. Reconnected with a friend (so important to build and maintain contacts) who got me back into the Defense Industry bc of my time in the military but was working really hard for only about $42k yearly at mid 20s or so. Did that for 3 years.
7. Then left that company and did the same thing after I learned the job and set my own shingle and started doing it as a self employed person. I’ve don’t that from maybe 27 to age 40 and am now earning pretty big dollars.

I say all of that because I really didn’t get things In gear until about age 30. Really. So my point is you can do it too. 30 is not too old. Your post resonated with me because I too looked for easier shortcuts to make money but could never sustain it. I flipped two houses. I flipped cars for money. I day traded and lost money. Once I came up with a reasonable game plan and executed, my financial life came together.

Decide what you really want to do, what you are good at or could become good at with effort and then go after it. But again, accept the fact that it will take some time. Where do you want to be at 35? In five years, you could be killing it.

At 30, really very few options are off the table.

I didn’t mean to be preachy or ramble so much but just wanted to encourage you that you can do this. It sounds like you have the ambition.

Good luck brother

I appreciate it, this is the kind of advice I was hoping to get from this.

Thank you, truly.

 

[Gamisch]

I don't know why you list this like it's a positive, but ok.



I am grateful, to the people who offered specific advice that worked for them.

I wrote a epistle ,quite positive but you decided to pick out this one sentence?

I think it's funny how you expose yourself for all of us to see.

I get a lotta of girly vibes, makes ne forget I am arguing (whut and why?) With a 30 y.o man .

You have no sense of urgency.

So I’m not sure how helpful this will be but my career track has not been so traditional and some ups and downs to get me where I am now.

1. 4 years enlisted Air Force in intelligence field
2. Then went and got Bachelors degree in business
3. Tried real estate with lack luster results
4. Then worked in a storage facility making $9 per hour
5. Then worked sears loss prevention making $7 an hour
6. Reconnected with a friend (so important to build and maintain contacts) who got me back into the Defense Industry bc of my time in the military but was working really hard for only about $42k yearly at mid 20s or so. Did that for 3 years.
7. Then left that company and did the same thing after I learned the job and set my own shingle and started doing it as a self employed person. I’ve don’t that from maybe 27 to age 40 and am now earning pretty big dollars.

I say all of that because I really didn’t get things In gear until about age 30. Really. So my point is you can do it too. 30 is not too old. Your post resonated with me because I too looked for easier shortcuts to make money but could never sustain it. I flipped two houses. I flipped cars for money. I day traded and lost money. Once I came up with a reasonable game plan and executed, my financial life came together.

Decide what you really want to do, what you are good at or could become good at with effort and then go after it. But again, accept the fact that it will take some time. Where do you want to be at 35? In five years, you could be killing it.

At 30, really very few options are off the table.

I didn’t mean to be preachy or ramble so much but just wanted to encourage you that you can do this. It sounds like you have the ambition.

Good luck brother

He won't do any of this. This is a list full of hard work, and then the opportunity to get lucky presents itself.

In 5 years he'll be BACK to living in Mommy land. I wanna olace ny bet right here right now, guaranteed free cash!

 

[BillyPilgrim]

I wrote a epistle ,quite positive but you decided to pick out this one sentence?

I think it's funny how you expose yourself for all of us to see.

I get a lotta of girly vibes, makes ne forget I am arguing (whut and why?) With a 30 y.o man .

You have no sense of urgency.


He won't do any of this. This is a list full of hard work, and then the opportunity to get lucky presents itself.

In 5 years he'll be BACK to living in Mommy land. I wanna olace ny bet right here right now, guaranteed free cash!

But are the odds of opportunity luck as good as they were before? Even @Stoic , who you quoted, has his doubts.

“How I Strike-Up Conversations With Cool Or Attractive Strangers, Get Their Contact Info In 5 Minutes, And Then Arrange To Meet Up Again..."

I've discovered there are 3 ways to start a conversation with a stranger who I maybe want to turn into a friend, date or meetup, but I’ll focus on the most basic one, and that is this... To start things off, I just ask them an innocent, non-invasive question. That's it. There's no magic to...

www.sosuave.net

"it wasn’t sarcasm. Just a curious observation I had.

society is ****ty now. Agreed. But why do you think? And agreed that people are less optimistic now. Why is that? Serious questions.. "

I've read the OP's other threads before and imo a change of scenery would help. Solar does really well out west and more people are going to be interested in using it, good sales opportunities in the western part of the US. Delaware, where he lives, isn't the most inspiring place lol.

 

[AAAgent]

You can leave now. Your solution is essentially "lul just werk", followed by a bunch of talk about how essentially I'm a massive failure, as is my dad, and how unfortunate for my mom (btw my brother isn't living at home, you seem to keep thinking that).

That's not useful, please go elsewhere.

I think they're both giving solid advice.

In your position, imo, if the advice isn't atleast a little harsh due to the reality of it, you're being sugarcoated and lied to. I came to this forum when i was 21 in a similar position. Graduated during the great recession, horrible grades, no applicable skills outside of being a former good athlete, math/english/science all complete garbage level knowledge.


First thing I did was acknowledge I fvcked up and am now in a sh1tty position all due to myself. If you can't acknowledge the problem and what caused it, you can't address the root issue and move forward. I acknowledged I made wrong choices believing girls, fighting, and being cool was the path to life, when in reality it was intelligence, studying, resourcefulness, and experience.

Seems like you don't have any of these things, so you will need to build them. I realized this early on and I did exactly what @Gamisch @All_Kindz_Of_Gainz suggested when i came to this forum.

I stop focusing on women and focused on myself. Instead of 2 years, i did it for 5 years. I worked 60 hours a week to level up myself at work. Initially, i wasn't the best but i worked the hardest. After my first 2 years, I became the best and the hardest working. I paid off my debt. I would try my own side hustle and fail. I lived paycheck to paycheck with $100 left at the end of the month after making my debt payments. Did that until year 3. I would then hire tutors to teach me on weekends to improve my english comprehension and math skills. Read hundreds of books. Some books 3,4,5 or even 7 times.

5 years in, my pay was slightly above that of my peers and debt fully paid off. I went from POS to being average I guess. 9 years in, I became a millionaire. 15 years later, I have a family, assets, no debt, high paying job, traveled the world, moved all over, and overall in a position in life where I can control the decisions I make comfortably.

I did not get there by complaining and refusing to face the music. If you don't have good counter arguments to what these guys are saying, they are likely right. You don't need to be happy about what they're saying but you should try to take-in what makes sense and start taking action. The more time you spend complaining about the situation, the more time you waste on achieving progress.

================================== <---- that's your progress bar. Start moving it forward.

 

[kavi]

In a developed high effficiency economy like what we are headed to, it will be very hard for anyone to make it on their own, because you will be competing with highly efficient developed, mature organisations. There wont be any individual opportunities for self-employment or setting up businesses.

Im sure we are already seeing this but ppl havent fully come to this realization yet. There will be very few opportunities out there.

The ones making money will simply be those with connectiions, networks etc.

So in a way there really is no way or very few ways to make money being self-employed, hustling, starting a business etc, cos things are too efficient and developed for any normie to be able to improve things or be competitive on his own.

Your problem is that you dont understand this direction that things are headed in.

In the old days, you could buy some land and build housing, some restaurant or some other small business and scale up. But now, all that easy stuff is done, you will be competing against big companies who already did that 50 years ago and grew since then. You cannot make it.

This is why men are struggling so much.

Things are simply too developed these days in the West for the old system of 'work hard and pull yourself up' to make any sense.

There is notjing else for anyone to do other than to demand the government make things easier for everyione.

I think consumption levels will drop in the developed world, because ppl might just bored of the work hard play hard lifestyle, and all the toys the cars, holdiays, expensive food experiences, all the stuff ppl bought and consumed in the past ppl will get bored and consume less in the West, then there will be even fewer opportunities, maybe fewer jobs (I dunno) but surely Inflation and the old economic model and value system wont make sense, the people who beleive in the old way will be a problem for progress.

And for men it is important to elevate oneself and to gain knowledge skills and expertise, just working hard to build a mcdonalds or sell some crap to someone like expensive shoes or a ferrari to some old business man isnt anything to be proud of nor will elevate your knowledge so we need to ask the question what is our economy and values based on.

 

[AAAgent]

In a developed high effficiency economy like what we are headed to, it will be very hard for anyone to make it on their own, because you will be competing with highly efficient developed, mature organisations. There wont be any individual opportunities for self-employment or setting up businesses.

Im sure we are already seeing this but ppl havent fully come to this realization yet. There will be very few opportunities out there.

The ones making money will simply be those with connectiions, networks etc.

So in a way there really is no way or very few ways to make money being self-employed, hustling, starting a business etc, cos things are too efficient and developed for any normie to be able to improve things or be competitive on his own.

Your problem is that you dont understand this direction that things are headed in.

In the old days, you could buy some land and build housing, some restaurant or some other small business and scale up. But now, all that easy stuff is done, you will be competing against big companies who already did that 50 years ago and grew since then. You cannot make it.

This is why men are struggling so much.

Things are simply too developed these days in the West for the old system of 'work hard and pull yourself up' to make any sense.

There is notjing else for anyone to do other than to demand the government make things easier for everyione.

I think consumption levels will drop in the developed world, because ppl might just bored of the work hard play hard lifestyle, and all the toys the cars, holdiays, expensive food experiences, all the stuff ppl bought and consumed in the past ppl will get bored and consume less in the West, then there will be even fewer opportunities, maybe fewer jobs (I dunno) but surely Inflation and the old economic model and value system wont make sense, the people who beleive in the old way will be a problem for progress.

And for men it is important to elevate oneself and to gain knowledge skills and expertise, just working hard to build a mcdonalds or sell some crap to someone like expensive shoes or a ferrari to some old business man isnt anything to be proud of nor will elevate your knowledge so we need to ask the question what is our economy and values based on.

This is because most of the people are being oppressed by our education system and being setup to fail. No one should be encouraging and promoting of pursuing careers in fields that don't make money and solve an immediate problem. Those fields should be highly risky and left to those in a position to do so.

Men are struggling because they've been brainwashed into becoming stupid, reliant, and having consequences removed from society. We end up thinking everything is free and easy.

If we actually pursued philosophy to better understand society, culture, and the world, we would understand how to be self reliant. Taught ourselves math, science, and learned skills, many of us would be in good shape. We still need plumbing, food, roofs over our head. Most people these days don't have any skills, don't even have basic level understandings of business, and therefore think things are out of their reach. I was in this exact position before, so I can relate and understand.

Consumption levels will drop, correct but they will always exist. The decreasing demand will strengthen the population so that we become stronger. Humans adapt when put in the right conditions. When we have bumper rails setup our entire lives, it's no wonder we're all scared to take risks or try to stand on our own two feet.

I think there will be more opportunities in the future as all the inefficiencies are weeded out and vacuums are created and creativity is allowed to thrive. If you are positioned well to act on it, you will do well. If you are not, you will suffer. But moving forward, many of the barriers setup to keep us complacent and stupid will be removed, allowing for the strong to really thrive.

 

[Dr.Suave]

Either way, if anybody reads this and has any insight on what they think I should do, I'd love to hear it. I've done all these things because I hate working the job I have now under my prick of a boss, and I've worked in corporate environments as a mortgage lender and came to the conclusion that I'd want to find a way to become wealthy where I'm not at somebody's beck and call.

Whatever is the solution, it will probably take time. Is it possible to swtich to a different job (different boss) in the meantime?

 

[pipeman84]

My advice would be to follow your passions, with no expectation of a particular outcome. As long as you're doing that, even if it requires 'hard work' (as seen from the outside), for you it will seem like a piece of cake.
But if you're working hard just for the money or the idea that in 5-10yrs you'll reach whatever monetary or career goal, even if that happens, it will be a frustratingly long journey that slowly kills your soul.

While I see immigrant working they a$$ off, with two jobs from Monday-Friday, and another one of 12 hours on Saturday,

To each their own man, for some people there's more to life than just work.

-ANY man older than 25 who lives at home is a man child. After 28..it becomes embarrassing..after 30? I'd write him off tbh.

Things are not that black and white. How about people who were sleeping on a friends couch or in a tiny room because they ploughed everything they had into the business they were working on. We hear about those who ended up successful, but what about the failures?
While living at home while you figure yourself out might be embarassing, how is working some dead end job you hate any more rewarding? The frustration and dissatisfaction with where you are will reverberate in all areas of life, including relationships with women.

 

[BPH]

I did not get there by complaining and refusing to face the music. If you don't have good counter arguments to what these guys are saying, they are likely right. You don't need to be happy about what they're saying but you should try to take-in what makes sense and start taking action. The more time you spend complaining about the situation, the more time you waste on achieving progress.

That's the thing though, it's not an argument.

I'm not trying to justify my position or be coddled with "everything's going to be ok" or something - I know I f***ed up, of course, it's depressing referencing that post I made several years ago and being in the exact same position, there's no denying that. That's why I came asking what worked for the people who "made it" because I've been confident that what I was doing was correct several times, and I've been wrong several times.

Notice how Stoic gave me good advice that I thanked him for, and Gamisch comes in just to say that he's wasting his breath, that I'll never do it, betting against me, and stating that my mention of him living with multiple women and being a father by my age as if it was a good thing "exposes a lot about who I am" despite doing the exact same thing to me the moment I stated that I do well with women...

None of that is constructive or useful, no "tough love", it's just being an a**hole and twisting the knife that I came here asking for advice on how to remove.

I stop focusing on women and focused on myself. Instead of 2 years, i did it for 5 years. I worked 60 hours a week to level up myself at work. Initially, i wasn't the best but i worked the hardest. After my first 2 years, I became the best and the hardest working. I paid off my debt. I would try my own side hustle and fail. I lived paycheck to paycheck with $100 left at the end of the month after making my debt payments. Did that until year 3. I would then hire tutors to teach me on weekends to improve my english comprehension and math skills. Read hundreds of books. Some books 3,4,5 or even 7 times.

5 years in, my pay was slightly above that of my peers and debt fully paid off. I went from POS to being average I guess. 9 years in, I became a millionaire. 15 years later, I have a family, assets, no debt, high paying job, traveled the world, moved all over, and overall in a position in life where I can control the decisions I make comfortably.

This is useful, this is what I'm looking for. The only question I have is how did you decide what this thing is that you were going to be the best and hardest working at? How did you pick what you wanted to do and make it work? Are you still doing it today?

Whatever is the solution, it will probably take time. Is it possible to swtich to a different job (different boss) in the meantime?

Possibly. The whole reason I'm doing what I'm doing is because I wanted the part-time flexibility to go up to New York or DC to do the acting/modeling stuff when they came around. I'm good at my job, it's easy, and there's minimal supervision so as long as I get my work done nothing else really matters.

I've looked around on job boards and stuff like Indeed or LinkedIn. It's hard to separate the good opportunities from the "shiny" ones. Most things I see are Wal Mart or Amazon jobs, with a bunch of commission-based sales jobs that advertise "up to $(whatever amount)" as their pay structure.

I'll check some more.

My advice would be to follow your passions, with no expectation of a particular outcome. As long as you're doing that, even if it requires 'hard work' (as seen from the outside), for you it will seem like a piece of cake.
But if you're working hard just for the money or the idea that in 5-10yrs you'll reach whatever monetary or career goal, even if that happens, it will be a frustratingly long journey that slowly kills your soul.

This is why I keep coming back to the idea of personal training, streaming, or stock market. The last of which I have the least faith in, but it has the fewest number of factors outside of my control. Training and streaming my concern would just be how long it would take to build something before I would be able to see returns from it...and that's probably the wrong mindset, but that's also why I probably need to just do something now and work on stuff like that on the side to see if it COULD be worth investing real time and effort into.

I liked Stoic's advice when it came to this. Another thing is it's hard to pick what I want to do because I don't REALLY care what that thing is if I can make money that would satisfy me by doing it...I don't think I have to like the job, so long as I like the freedom it affords me.

 

[FlirtLife]

This is why I keep coming back to the idea of personal training, streaming, or stock market. The last of which I have the least faith in, but it has the fewest number of factors outside of my control.

Investing needs a foundation, and I argue for passive index funds (S&P 500, total stock market) as the start of that foundation.

But if you're broke, you first need an emergency fund - you need savings. You know what grows much faster than the stock market? Credit card debt. Having savings means you can spend money to fix something, and avoid credit card debt.

 

[CountSuavula]

It sounds like the original poster is unfocused.