How to take rejections

[Bingo-Player]

Ive done a lot of cold approaching this year and naturally have taken a lot of rejection its been tough at times and very deflating its taken a lot of resilience to keep picking myself back up

But its also forced me too not only toughen up as a man but also fix glaring holes in my game

Ive done around 100 approaches this year ( it could be more) and strangely my intial in person approaches have gone largely well I seem to get instagrams and numbers without a problem and only a handful of girls have given me the " I HAVE A BOYFREIND " death sentence

Its messaging where I normally tend to talk myself into trouble either revealing too much too fast or being too interested girls seem to be able to pick it up enthusiasm from a mile off and it seems to turn them sick

Female brain works like this - " this guy is interested in me and is making an effort with me" - GHOST

and also like this

" this guy isn't really putting much effort into his messages , why isn't he !?! " I want to know more "

Its confusing ASF and goes against every grain of traditional dating advice but that is how they play the game

---------------------------------------------------

Ive also learnt you can get away with a HELL of a lot more in person ..... you can make bold statements and stare her dead in the eye and she will be forced to respond ( they like this because it allows them to fall into their feminine frame and submiss ) you force an emotional response and we all know how much women love to be emotional

Online she has too much time to internalise the message , show it to her girlfriends and share it in WhatsApp chats none of this is good for you when you want compliance in the early stages which is why its better to keep messages short and sweet

Ultimately no man WANTS to experience rejection from a female

But if you put the bruised ego aside there's so much data and self learning you can take from a rejection,

And not only that I mean do you know how much of a rush it is to go up and talk to that HB 9 with the perfect booty in the gym stare her dead in the eye and demand her details ?

I did it yesterday and it was like doing a line of pure columbian cokaine , my heart and adrenaline were going crazy

 

[manfrombelow]

Ive done around 100 approaches this year ( it could be more)

100 cold approaches take massive, enormous, gigantic balls. Be proud of yourself. About rejections? It's fvcking part of the game.

 

[Bingo-Player]

Yea just wanted this post more so to be about the mental aspect of dealing with them because psychologically it can be intense , girls are absolutely ruthless in ghosting these days and its so easy to start believing you need to change who you are too try and get results

You don't you just need to understand women and their reverse ways of mate selection

paradoxically the cure to being rejected is actually being rejected

 

[AmsterdamAssassin]

I dislike ghosting. If I reject a woman, I'm quite direct. And while some women take rejection personal, most realise that I'm saving them time and effort and money courting someone who isn't attracted to them anyway.

 

[Bingo-Player]

I dislike ghosting. If I reject a woman, I'm quite direct. And while some women take rejection personal, most realise that I'm saving them time and effort and money courting someone who isn't attracted to them anyway.

With all due respect You are in an age group (50 +) where the game is completely different , women in your age range have very little left to offer in terms of beauty and physicality and are looking for guys to head into retirement with

This affords you a lot more room for manoeuvre in selection as I expect women are far less wishy washy and will take what they can get

Younger women Under 30 are not direct , they have options coming out of their ears and like to be hyper selective in whom they are dating

A young woman literally doesn't have time to explain to every guy why she isn't interested

They just go ghost.

 

[SW15]

Doing 100 approaches is a good thing. All unattached men seeking a romantic interaction of any kind should be proud of that accomplishment.

When a man does 100 approaches of strangers, he's bound to put up with A LOT of rejections. Results will vary but a lot of men won't get more than a handful of first dates out of 100 approaches. When a man does 100 stranger approaches, he will get sex from an even lower number of women than getting the number of women who would show up for a first date with him. That sexual number considers sex occurring either as a result of some number of dates or same night sex from bar approaching. Same day sex from a non-bar approach is extremely rare, even for skilled seducers.

I encourage all reading this thread to consider the experiences of 2 of this forum's biggest volume approachers (@nicksaiz65 and @Jesse Pinkman ). These two men take A LOT of rejections. These approach journals/field reports are major assets to this forum because it shows how much effort goes into getting laid from approaching strangers. The case can be made that both of these men are focused more on shorter term sex than longer relationships. Regardless of one's goal in romantic interactions, the rejection rate is going to be high.

Approach Journal: The Summer of NickSaiz65

Hey guys, I’ve wanted to do this for a while, and I’m finally getting around to it. This is an approach journal for the summer months, from now until September 1. Will be going hard on Cold Approach these months to generate more options and improve my approach Game. I will include all of the...

www.sosuave.net

Jesse Pinkman's approach/field reports thread.

So I thought that since I am going out and approaching so much, why not post a field report thread. Yeah, it is a little over 3 AM and I am posting this but whatever. Hate to post a new thread every time I go out and do approaches so I will just keep bumping this one (until mods make an official...

www.sosuave.net

There are plenty of men who sustain psychological damage from the rejection level that accompanies approaching strangers. Going out of one's home, talking to strangers, and having nothing to show for it hurts a lot.

A man can try and avoid taking initial in-person rejections by swiping and sending DMs on social media. Instead, he'll be taking virtual rejections and likely a very high volume of virtual rejections. That can also be psychologically damaging.

I don't agree with the idea that the cure for being rejected is actually being rejected. There's always going to be some level of rejection but the better idea is to minimize the rejection. A man is to put a fair amount of thought into what his goals are and how he can best achieve them. For a lot of men, avoid approaching and swipe apps will be beneficial. When a man avoids approaching strangers, swipe apps, and sending DMs on social media platforms, he's left with the option of his social circle, which he may have to cultivate from nothing. Plenty of men relocate to a new city at some point in their lives and have the need to cultivate a social circle from zero. The best way to have a social circle is to be an agreeable guy and live in the same geographic area for most of your life. The men who play social circle game the best are the men who had the advantage of being in the same area for ALL of their K-12 schooling years and remained in that area as adults. These are typically normie range men on both social skills and looks.

Social circle is great for getting a girlfriend. Pay close attention to the words "a girlfriend". That means one girlfriend. If you're looking for an extended relationship (2-5 years or more), your best bet for getting that with the least amount of grief and frustration is social circle. Many men who get social circle girlfriends tend to retain those girlfriends for a long time and often beyond the useful life of the relationship. A lot of the social circle girlfriend guys are beta males and beta males operate from a scarcity mindset. It's common to see a 10 year+ relationship from social circle which does lead to a marriage proposal. Longevity of a relationship is not that strong of an indicator of the quality of the relationship.

A social circle introduction is a higher percentage play than a swipe app interaction or approaching a stranger (either in a bar or non-bar setting). Approaching strangers is a more difficult path and it's not a path I recommend highly. Social circle is better in the shorter to medium term. You can get a solid, medium term (1-4 years) girlfriend via social circles more easily than through approaches or swiping more easily.

The problem with social circles becomes sustainability over a longer period of time (5+ years). Social circles have a way of getting pissed off at men who continually exchange girlfriends without marriage or babies, even if the relationships are semi-long (1-4 years). Men with more alpha or sigma male tendencies would be more inclined to be men who would continually exchange girlfriends. Remember that social circles generally have a blue pill viewpoint on romantic relationships. After 2 or so instances of medium term relationships, the social circle will run dry. Social circle is not likely ideal for a serial monogamist who does have extended relationships but doesn't commit or the player type who tends to have relationships of less than 1 year.

I recommend all men utilize strategies and tactics to minimize rejection and minimize the psychological damage that will come from taking a lot of rejections. Primarily utilizing social circle game over approaching strangers, using swipe apps, or sending DMs on social media will be the best way to minimize rejections.

 

[DreamAgain]

Good job on all those cold approaches, where are you getting all the opportunities to do it?

In the gym most girls just look to keep to themselves and rarely give out indicators of interest.

Grocery store the same, and definitely walking down the street with her friends.

So I'm guessing it's mostly in the bars?

 

[Redarc23]

Have you tried calling or sending a voice note to invite them out?

 

[CAPSLOCK BANDIT]

If your not Atleast taking a voice recording or even taking a video of your approach, your leaving a lot on the table to learn from, you can do hundreds of approaches but the fact is that we tend to do what's comfortable and fall into a groove, you need these insights to tweak what your doing and make it even better.

 

[Bingo-Player]

Good job on all those cold approaches, where are you getting all the opportunities to do it?

In the gym most girls just look to keep to themselves and rarely give out indicators of interest.

Grocery store the same, and definitely walking down the street with her friends.

So I'm guessing it's mostly in the bars?

No done at least 30 approaches in gyms alone , its my favourite place to actually do them because you have the instant conversation topic

Girls generally don't give choosing signals in gyms because if the guy turns out to be weird and obsessive she may have to find a new gym , this doesn't mean she isn't interested it just means she's VERY cautious so your approach needs to bear this in mind

The rest have been bars , holidays, festivals and restaurants

Holidays are another one of my favourites too easy especially around any hotel

 

[Bingo-Player]

Have you tried calling or sending a voice note to invite them out?

Yea send loads of voice notes definitely gets higher response rate than a message

EVERYONE opens a voice note

 

[Bingo-Player]

If your not Atleast taking a voice recording or even taking a video of your approach, your leaving a lot on the table to learn from, you can do hundreds of approaches but the fact is that we tend to do what's comfortable and fall into a groove, you need these insights to tweak what your doing and make it even better.

yes that is what this whole thread is about

 

[AmsterdamAssassin]

With all due respect You are in an age group (50 +) where the game is completely different , women in your age range have very little left to offer in terms of beauty and physicality and are looking for guys to head into retirement with

This affords you a lot more room for manoeuvre in selection as I expect women are far less wishy washy and will take what they can get

Younger women Under 30 are not direct , they have options coming out of their ears and like to be hyper selective in whom they are dating

A young woman literally doesn't have time to explain to every guy why she isn't interested

They just go ghost.

Ages of my current lovers: 24, 28, 35, 42. Not all players are in the same league.

 

[AmsterdamAssassin]

Good job on all those cold approaches, where are you getting all the opportunities to do it?

I meet most women just walking around Amsterdam.

 

[AmsterdamAssassin]

EVERYONE opens a voice note

Not EVERYONE. I dislike receiving voice messages. Either call or write.

But I know some of my lovers record me when I read to them. Probably puts them to sleep.

 

[Bingo-Player]

Ages of my current lovers: 24, 28, 35, 42. Not all players are in the same league.

You're paying to play then ?

 

[AmsterdamAssassin]

You're paying to play then ?

You looking to get on my sh1t list?

 

[Gamisch]

Doing 100 approaches is a good thing. All unattached men seeking a romantic interaction of any kind should be proud of that accomplishment.

When a man does 100 approaches of strangers, he's bound to put up with A LOT of rejections. Results will vary but a lot of men won't get more than a handful of first dates out of 100 approaches. When a man does 100 stranger approaches, he will get sex from an even lower number of women than getting the number of women who would show up for a first date with him. That sexual number considers sex occurring either as a result of some number of dates or same night sex from bar approaching. Same day sex from a non-bar approach is extremely rare, even for skilled seducers.

I encourage all reading this thread to consider the experiences of 2 of this forum's biggest volume approachers (@nicksaiz65 and @Jesse Pinkman ). These two men take A LOT of rejections. These approach journals/field reports are major assets to this forum because it shows how much effort goes into getting laid from approaching strangers. The case can be made that both of these men are focused more on shorter term sex than longer relationships. Regardless of one's goal in romantic interactions, the rejection rate is going to be high.

Approach Journal: The Summer of NickSaiz65

Hey guys, I’ve wanted to do this for a while, and I’m finally getting around to it. This is an approach journal for the summer months, from now until September 1. Will be going hard on Cold Approach these months to generate more options and improve my approach Game. I will include all of the...

www.sosuave.net

Jesse Pinkman's approach/field reports thread.

So I thought that since I am going out and approaching so much, why not post a field report thread. Yeah, it is a little over 3 AM and I am posting this but whatever. Hate to post a new thread every time I go out and do approaches so I will just keep bumping this one (until mods make an official...

www.sosuave.net

There are plenty of men who sustain psychological damage from the rejection level that accompanies approaching strangers. Going out of one's home, talking to strangers, and having nothing to show for it hurts a lot.

A man can try and avoid taking initial in-person rejections by swiping and sending DMs on social media. Instead, he'll be taking virtual rejections and likely a very high volume of virtual rejections. That can also be psychologically damaging.

I don't agree with the idea that the cure for being rejected is actually being rejected. There's always going to be some level of rejection but the better idea is to minimize the rejection. A man is to put a fair amount of thought into what his goals are and how he can best achieve them. For a lot of men, avoid approaching and swipe apps will be beneficial. When a man avoids approaching strangers, swipe apps, and sending DMs on social media platforms, he's left with the option of his social circle, which he may have to cultivate from nothing. Plenty of men relocate to a new city at some point in their lives and have the need to cultivate a social circle from zero. The best way to have a social circle is to be an agreeable guy and live in the same geographic area for most of your life. The men who play social circle game the best are the men who had the advantage of being in the same area for ALL of their K-12 schooling years and remained in that area as adults. These are typically normie range men on both social skills and looks.

Social circle is great for getting a girlfriend. Pay close attention to the words "a girlfriend". That means one girlfriend. If you're looking for an extended relationship (2-5 years or more), your best bet for getting that with the least amount of grief and frustration is social circle. Many men who get social circle girlfriends tend to retain those girlfriends for a long time and often beyond the useful life of the relationship. A lot of the social circle girlfriend guys are beta males and beta males operate from a scarcity mindset. It's common to see a 10 year+ relationship from social circle which does lead to a marriage proposal. Longevity of a relationship is not that strong of an indicator of the quality of the relationship.

A social circle introduction is a higher percentage play than a swipe app interaction or approaching a stranger (either in a bar or non-bar setting). Approaching strangers is a more difficult path and it's not a path I recommend highly. Social circle is better in the shorter to medium term. You can get a solid, medium term (1-4 years) girlfriend via social circles more easily than through approaches or swiping more easily.

The problem with social circles becomes sustainability over a longer period of time (5+ years). Social circles have a way of getting pissed off at men who continually exchange girlfriends without marriage or babies, even if the relationships are semi-long (1-4 years). Men with more alpha or sigma male tendencies would be more inclined to be men who would continually exchange girlfriends. Remember that social circles generally have a blue pill viewpoint on romantic relationships. After 2 or so instances of medium term relationships, the social circle will run dry. Social circle is not likely ideal for a serial monogamist who does have extended relationships but doesn't commit or the player type who tends to have relationships of less than 1 year.

I recommend all men utilize strategies and tactics to minimize rejection and minimize the psychological damage that will come from taking a lot of rejections. Primarily utilizing social circle game over approaching strangers, using swipe apps, or sending DMs on social media will be the best way to minimize rejections.

Look , i really liked @IKO69 comment that its actually unbelievable how intelligent men cant figure out ways to approach women and take a rejection with that . Its mostly the rejection that holds them back , we know. The Rejection becomes this entity that is always there with them ,showing them how embarrassing it will be.

All the while a rejection can actually be fun. You can actually GAIN confidence by getting rejected. You push yourself and its EXACTLY similar to having your first fight in the ring.

A rejection can have many layers. It can be that you are "flirting "hard with her during your approach, her giggling and eye fecking you ,while the outcome is still a rejection. Many men think she will call the police right away . I never had a woman I've approached do something like that. The worst thing that happens is women silently ignoring me .

No matter the outcome, we as men are allowed and yes , maybe even obligated to approach women. Its amazing how rejection became such a huge thing for most of us.

If anything, now is a great time to approach again. Most men are p00sies and women are easy about trying new D. If you Chad maxx yourself you can definitely make it work.

 

[manfrombelow]

A young woman literally doesn't have time to explain to every guy why she isn't interested

They just go ghost.

Exact-fvcking-ly.

Young women don't verbally tell you that they don't wanna see you again, they just do aka ghosting. It's part of the game also.

 

[IKO69]

Look , i really liked @IKO69 comment that its actually unbelievable how intelligent men cant figure out ways to approach women and take a rejection with that . Its mostly the rejection that holds them back , we know. The Rejection becomes this entity that is always there with them ,showing them how embarrassing it will be.

All the while a rejection can actually be fun. You can actually GAIN confidence by getting rejected. You push yourself and its EXACTLY similar to having your first fight in the ring.

A rejection can have many layers. It can be that you are "flirting "hard with her during your approach, her giggling and eye fecking you ,while the outcome is still a rejection. Many men think she will call the police right away . I never had a woman I've approached do something like that. The worst thing that happens is women silently ignoring me .

No matter the outcome, we as men are allowed and yes , maybe even obligated to approach women. Its amazing how rejection became such a huge thing for most of us.

If anything, now is a great time to approach again. Most men are p00sies and women are easy about trying new D. If you Chad maxx yourself you can definitely make it work.

Look , i really liked @IKO69 comment that its actually unbelievable how intelligent men cant figure out ways to approach women and take a rejection with that . Its mostly the rejection that holds them back , we know. The Rejection becomes this entity that is always there with them ,showing them how embarrassing it will be.

All the while a rejection can actually be fun. You can actually GAIN confidence by getting rejected. You push yourself and its EXACTLY similar to having your first fight in the ring.

A rejection can have many layers. It can be that you are "flirting "hard with her during your approach, her giggling and eye fecking you ,while the outcome is still a rejection. Many men think she will call the police right away . I never had a woman I've approached do something like that. The worst thing that happens is women silently ignoring me .

No matter the outcome, we as men are allowed and yes , maybe even obligated to approach women. Its amazing how rejection became such a huge thing for most of us.

If anything, now is a great time to approach again. Most men are p00sies and women are easy about trying new D. If you Chad maxx yourself you can definitely make it work.

There are lots of brainiacs that have this problem - they'll talk like they are some kind of living, breathing encyclopedia- they can recite all these mathematical theorems and proofs, engineer bridges and dams but put them around a woman they like and want to approach, they shut down and can't function. They'll run out of the room if they have a chance. They put the whole rejection thing on a pedestal not realizing it doesn't mean anything. Who cares if you are rejected - every guy gets rejected. Every guy who people point to and say "that guy is good with women" 100% endured a ton of rejection in the process. A guy doesn't just wake up one day and is good with women, there is a growth process involved as with everything in life. You don't just pick up a guitar and all of a sudden you play like Eddie Van Halen --- you suck for a long time in the process.

I don't fault the guys for disliking rejection - it's understandable, no one likes to be rejected - but the avoidance and unwillingness to go for it really hurts these guys in the long run. All the excuse making that comes with why they can't do it is comical as well. So smart but not smart enough to realize it's only difficult because they are VERY INEXPERIENCED. There is really nothing more that needs to be said. Life is what you make of it. Some people choose to stay on the sidelines, let them.