How to respond to HB

[drift king]

Ok I met a HB last week and things went ok I guess, I would say it's about 50/50 could happen, may not.

I decided to flake on her a little in hope to increase her eagerness and interest level. I was suppose to call her this weekend but I didn't and I'm planning to send her a text today apologizing and that I'll call her tonight (but I won't) then texting her again in a couple days saying I keep forgetting to call her and that I don't have time to see her right now (just to show i don't need her).

What should I respond with if she counters with ''yeah I'm really busy too, let's just be friends' or words similar to that?

 

[SilverSonnet]

Dude, why are you flaking on her to make her like you more? If she gave you her number, fvcking use it! Jesus, flaking's for women. Your a MAN. So be one, grab your balls, call her, arrange a date, and get to it.
It's not hard, and your making it harder than it has to be. That's for women.

Then your second point, who cares if she wants to be friends? Your a MAN! If she DOES say this you reply with "I have enough friends thanks" and you put the phone down, and you forget about her. Dude, there's too many women in the world, to be worrying about ONE.

 

[DonGorgon]

Flaking is for players who want to get the PU$$Y fast... OP is on track but over doing it just a bit

 

[ARrocket]

It's ok to not call this weekend and then text her, but don't go any further than that.

 

[drift king]

Flaking is for players who want to get the PU$$Y fast... OP is on track but over doing it just a bit

Hmm.. I think her interest level is kind of in the middle like indifferent which is never good, I just felt the flaking would be a good way to turn things in my favour more.

How should I respond if she counters with 'Ok I've been busy too, let's be friends'?

I have not heard from her since our date as I would have expected and I sent her a text today saying I would call her tonight (which I won't).

 

[drift king]

It's ok to not call this weekend and then text her, but don't go any further than that.

I see.. but what should I text her?

I already sent that I'd call her tonight but I haven't.

 

[ready123]

you need to have interest already for that flaking sht to work

 

[drift king]

you need to have interest already for that flaking sht to work

Well I'm not 100% sure what her interest level is so any advice on how to respond if she tries to LJBF me with that comment?

 

[SickAgain]

First off, do not text, call. Calling puts them on the spot and texting gives them too much comfort.

Second, never apologize for not calling. Never apologize for such trivial and banal things. I doubt she was waiting by the phone and you ruined her night.

It seems like you're playing too much games already and she might catch on. And those who play games obviously are insecure and demonstrate lesser value (male or female) based on the fact that they NEED to play games just to get what they want. Just be mature about things, and I'm sure you'll be fine.

And if she LJBF you, you can either say yes or no. Simply put, but I wouldn't worry about it.

 

[drift king]

First off, do not text, call. Calling puts them on the spot and texting gives them too much comfort.

Second, never apologize for not calling. Never apologize for such trivial and banal things. I doubt she was waiting by the phone and you ruined her night.

It seems like you're playing too much games already and she might catch on. And those who play games obviously are insecure and demonstrate lesser value (male or female) based on the fact that they NEED to play games just to get what they want. Just be mature about things, and I'm sure you'll be fine.

And if she LJBF you, you can either say yes or no. Simply put, but I wouldn't worry about it.

I see your point. I tried to make it sound like she was waiting by the phone and disappointed I didn't call in a funny way but she didn't respond back to me yesterday with an 'ok' when I said I'd call last night (which I didn't)

If she says to me she just sees us as 'friends' what would be a ****y and funny response to give?

plus if she does agree to meet up again but starts to give me a difficult time about when to meet and then she'll 'let me know' how should I respond to that?

 

[SickAgain]

If you she sees you as a friend that means game over and you lost. It doesn't really matter what you say at that point, you can either accept to be her friend or not.

As far as her being difficult and being unsure about meeting up, I would ask her what her schedule is like and you could maybe match up your open gaps. Some people see this as weak because you're conforming to her schedule, but I figure you gotta do that anyways. Recently, what worked for me was I just asked a girl to lunch, since everyone eats lunch, and its not like a serious deal.

My general advice is to bail out if you feel she's not interested and grow some balls and just do what you feel like doing, which would be more natural. If she can't dig that, then that's her problem and you move on w/o wasting anymore time.

 

[drift king]

What is the best phone etiquette for calling?

I'm calling her from the office so I don't think my number is showing up, is it only wise to call once a day at different times if my number isn't being shown.

She may presume the call is from me. To be honest I'm not 100% certain she'd pick up if she knows it is me or won't call me back.

I can't guage her interest level.

 

[SickAgain]

I've told you all I know. Your best bet now is the DJ Bible. Always look at your actions objectively.

 

[drift king]

Is there something in the bible about phone call etiquette?

 

[ezily]

I see your point. I tried to make it sound like she was waiting by the phone and disappointed I didn't call in a funny way but she didn't respond back to me yesterday with an 'ok' when I said I'd call last night (which I didn't)

yeah I think you blew you chance. She's not replying to you anymore which may mean she has lost interest.

If you were going to flake that's OK for one time. But, man, do not go texting telling her you will call her and then don't. That's some lame, AFC, and girly. Be a man. you should have just called. No texting. Don't apologize for flaking. Just set something else up. But still, I hope you've learned from your mistakes. I doubt she's going to go anywhere with you now.

And about talking on the phone. Just be yourself. Keep the conversation to no more than 6 minutes. See how things are going with her and then set up a time to meet. That's all you need to do. There's plenty of time to talk when you're out.

 

[sherineo]

okay I'd call it a bad strategy....

Ideally you shouldn't be putting a lot of brain in it to figure out how she'd think or respond...

you are doing this coz...you are afraid of rejection so you are unconsciously trying to delay it...

forget about if she's a HB or not.....infact don't even use the term...

try to be around her...and fluff talk her as much as possible...

Remember : You just have to fluff talk without paying attention to her HB status.

Do it till you are comfy enough to talk to her like your regular friends.

come back and report it here then .

would tell you the next step.

sherineo

 

[drift king]

Hmm.. I think I'm getting confused with this flaking stuff.. I thought saying I'd call and not doing it over the weekend would have been a good idea.

I guess the type of flaking I am doing is not working out well.

I tried calling her and she just hangs up the phone making it go automatically go to voicemail twice. She may not know it's me with no caller id shown as I'm calling from the office but I guess the fact I did it twice in succession she might have her suspicions. The 2 times I've spoken to her on the phone it's been via the no caller ID.

Is it better I just tell her I'm not interested in seeing her any more since she hasn't actually verbally told me 'no' yet. I mean I can't tell her this on the phone if she doesn't pick up so I have no choice but to text her or leave a voicemail.

What would you suggest to do?

 

[drift king]

yeah I think you blew you chance. She's not replying to you anymore which may mean she has lost interest.

If you were going to flake that's OK for one time. But, man, do not go texting telling her you will call her and then don't. That's some lame, AFC, and girly. Be a man. you should have just called. No texting. Don't apologize for flaking. Just set something else up. But still, I hope you've learned from your mistakes. I doubt she's going to go anywhere with you now.

And about talking on the phone. Just be yourself. Keep the conversation to no more than 6 minutes. See how things are going with her and then set up a time to meet. That's all you need to do. There's plenty of time to talk when you're out.

I was actually intending to call but something came up that had me stressing. If that is the case should I not apologize and explain?

Like I said I'd call last night.. and I didn't not because I didn't want to but because something else came up. If she's not taking my calls then I can't exactly set things up unless I text her this.

 

[ezily]

Yeah texting saying that you're sorry you didn't call or respond is definitely lame and AFC. Don't do it. If the only way you can contact her is by text then you have no chance. Just move on.

 

[Jitterbug]

Your flaking would have zero effect on her if she hasn't invested anything in you / the date with you (financially and/or emotionally). If she's really a HB - Hot Babe - she would have many offers and simply pick another option and dump your flakey arse.

The man's version of that is a DJ spinning plates. If a plate flakes on him, do you think he'd give a sh!t if he could get another plate to go out with him that night?

A HB flaking on a date with a guy usually has a real and significant effect on him because he's often the one who approaches her and sets up the date from A to Z, whereas she only has to decide whether she's in the mood to show up or not. The guy who does everything from A-Z for the date and then flakes on the HB is shooting himself in the foot.