How to respond to HB

[SilverSonnet]

I see your point. I tried to make it sound like she was waiting by the phone and disappointed I didn't call in a funny way but she didn't respond back to me yesterday with an 'ok' when I said I'd call last night (which I didn't)

If she says to me she just sees us as 'friends' what would be a ****y and funny response to give?

plus if she does agree to meet up again but starts to give me a difficult time about when to meet and then she'll 'let me know' how should I respond to that?

Guys, NEVER SAY SORRY! Sorry is for women, sure, admit you were wrong, but never let that word slip out. it's a word of submission. Just take my advice, I know what I'm talking about

Ben

 

[drift king]

Yeah texting saying that you're sorry you didn't call or respond is definitely lame and AFC. Don't do it. If the only way you can contact her is by text then you have no chance. Just move on.

Ahh ok point taken. So if I don't say sorry, what do I say to make the point that I didn't call and acknowledged that fact?

She's not pick up my calls (though she doesn't know it's me as I was calling from the office) but I think she suspects it's me..

IF that is the case if I call today from my cell number she will automatically assume it was me from last night even though she has no proof last night the calls were?

I think calling today just will make her feel even more wary of me but I already sent her an email LJBF'ing her before she had a chance to do it to me saying I didn't have time to see her and that I didn't think there was anything there. She doesn't check it that often so don't know when she'll see it but I still would prefer I did it in a more blunt way.

I'm gona tell her I'm not interested in seeing her anymore as she hasn't verbally told me it's over so at least I can walk away with some dignity by rejecting her.

 

[Nighthawk]

Problem is, people who have no intention of seeing someone anymore simply stop calling.

Text her and say 'tried calling you, no answer, bored now, gonna drown some kittens instead.'

 

[drift king]

If I try calling her again today and she doesn't pick up I'm thinking of ending it on the note of a text straight after with:

''Hey I forgot to call you on Monday cos something came up.. check your email I've explained it there. You're a great girl but I'm not sure I'm interested in seeing you anymore. Take care.''

Is this too harsh?

The thing is she will presume the calls last night were from me even though she has no proof cos there was no caller ID so would be wary of my call today from my cell number. So I doubt she'd be inclined to pick up anyway, I already LJBF'd her in my email and I thought I should be more blunt like the message I plan to send above.. Is this too much, any suggestions of how to word it better?

It just seems a little too much too late even though technically I haven't actually called her (that she knows of anyway)

 

[drift king]

yeah I think you blew you chance. She's not replying to you anymore which may mean she has lost interest.

If you were going to flake that's OK for one time. But, man, do not go texting telling her you will call her and then don't. That's some lame, AFC, and girly. Be a man. you should have just called. No texting. Don't apologize for flaking. Just set something else up. But still, I hope you've learned from your mistakes. I doubt she's going to go anywhere with you now.

And about talking on the phone. Just be yourself. Keep the conversation to no more than 6 minutes. See how things are going with her and then set up a time to meet. That's all you need to do. There's plenty of time to talk when you're out.

Say I misread the situation and she may have had some interest but by me not calling over the weekend as I said I would and then telling her on Monday that I was sorry for not calling and I'd call that night she has now lost interest cos of this AFC stuff you say I did.

If I reject her now much in a way how a girl does to a guy will this have absolutely zero effect on her?

She's a HB and I doubt anyone has ever rejected her in her life so I would have thought this would come as quite a shock.

I still don't know for certain that she's lost interest but the pure fact I didn't get a message from her over the weekend about me not calling her nor an 'ok' when I said sorry on monday sends a signal to me that it's pretty much over.

Is rejecting her now really going to do very little? (bear in mind she doesn't know for certain the calls last night were from me.. she only suspects they were)

 

[drift king]

Problem is, people who have no intention of seeing someone anymore simply stop calling.

Text her and say 'tried calling you, no answer, bored now, gonna drown some kittens instead.'

Hmm.. I see your point, she doesn't know for sure it was me last night but my email half an hour after the calls may suggest it was and raised her suspicion.

If she is suspicious it was me then me calling today she'll not be inclined to speak to me.. maybe I should try calling tomorrow or would I really need to wait longer than that?

 

[Nighthawk]

Ok I met a HB last week and things went ok I guess, I would say it's about 50/50 could happen, may not.

Really need more information than this.

 

[SickAgain]

Just give me her phone number and I'll call her for you, you emasculated turnip.

 

[drift king]

Really need more information than this.

I couldn't really tell her interest level. I would have said it was moderate but the fact she didn't respond to me when I said I'd call her and didn't somewhat tells me it was lower than I thought.

Is the message I'm planning to send her (5 messages up) too harsh?

She may just see it as a direct bitter response of her not picking up my calls yesterday.

 

[Nighthawk]

Please detail your interaction with this woman. You approached? Where? Conversation? Etc.

Your post history indicates you ask for a lot of numbers from barely interested women and fail to get anywhere much. This suggests you are not doing enough to raise attraction before getting a number, hence the flakes/fake numbers/no pick-ups/email responses.

 

[DonGorgon]

I say this is done... when women want you ... you know it doubt is minimal... until they dont want you as much... which al shows in their actions.

 

[drift king]

Please detail your interaction with this woman. You approached? Where? Conversation? Etc.

Your post history indicates you ask for a lot of numbers from barely interested women and fail to get anywhere much. This suggests you are not doing enough to raise attraction before getting a number, hence the flakes/fake numbers/no pick-ups/email responses.

Yeah I haven't posted in a long while. I approached her went on a date with her had some talk kino'd a bit not much receptive behaviour from her. She's foreign though and in their culture they generally don't touch like they don't even greet people with kisses or hugs as it's not the done thing. (i did not know this till after when someone told me) so made the mistake of over kino-ing.

I generally thought it was about 50/50 whether we'd see each other again. She said she would assuming the next day she didn't have an early start for work and I said I'd call her over the weekend but I never did.

Obviously girls say one thing but don't necessarily mean it. I sent her an email to reply to the email she had sent me prior to our date which had a question in it but I chose the wrong time to do it i.e. the next day after we met.

That probably is what killed it as I must have looked overkeen even though I was just responding to her previous email.

Fast forward to today. I haven't spoken to her since we met and I'm just thinking of ending it with a rejection so that I can walk away with some dignity unlike my previous cases.

 

[drift king]

I say this is done... when women want you ... you know it doubt is minimal... until they dont want you as much... which al shows in their actions.

Yes very true but I felt she was sitting on the fence a little, as in had some interest but not so much, indifference if you like. I was thinking of sending her this if she doesn't pick up my call later:

''Hey I forgot to call you on Monday cos something came up.. check your email I've explained it there. You're a great girl but I'm not sure I'm interested in seeing you anymore. Take care.''

That might be a little harsh and she might just think it's a bitter response to her supposedly not picking up my calls last night (even thought she doesn't know it was me but suspects it was).

Maybe adding ''we can still be friends'' before the ''take care'' would be a better idea.. but I dont want her to think that I'm trying a different way of trying to get her via the 'friends' route.

I presume me calling later from my cell number she'll feel like I've called so many times even though she doesn't know it was me yesterday?

 

[SickAgain]

Don't e-mail, text, or even call her. You're obviously a wreck. Disconnect yourself from this girl because she officially took over your life without even trying. Trust me on this. Please just let this die.

 

[drift king]

Don't e-mail, text, or even call her. You're obviously a wreck. Disconnect yourself from this girl because she officially took over your life without even trying. Trust me on this. Please just let this die.

To be honest I'm actually quite calm as I've come to terms with the fact that it's over but it's more that I'd like to end in on my terms with ME rejecting HER.

I've accepted it's over but I don't want to leave it without me at least saying it's over rather than her saying it to me.

 

[SickAgain]

I don't see what's the point of this if you don't want to listen to any sound advice. Being stubborn is an extremely poor personality trait. Large egos too. If you take anything away from this experience, understand that you're still an AFC based on the fact you screwed up something so easy to close.

 

[drift king]

I don't see what's the point of this if you don't want to listen to any sound advice. Being stubborn is an extremely poor personality trait. Large egos too. If you take anything away from this experience, understand that you're still an AFC based on the fact you screwed up something so easy to close.

I don't follow why was it so easy to close in my case?

Her interest level was moderate at best. I was already acting too keen so by me calling on the weekend as I said I would she'd probably just not have picked up or got back to me.

I haven't heard any advice about what to say to end things apart from the usual 'next' which is what I'm planning to do once I've ended it in the right way.

 

[slaog]

Try ending it the way you said and try to get her to be your friend. If you both ever meet up as friends you'll be the high value man who dumped the HB! Lots of if's and but's of course but worth a chance.

Spin a few plates. Its the best way to forget about her. Its obvious you really liked her but every time after I got rejected I learned my lessons and I'm now at a stage where I'm not the least bit worried about rejection and that means I'm more relaxed etc on the date.

 

[drift king]

Try ending it the way you said and try to get her to be your friend. If you both ever meet up as friends you'll be the high value man who dumped the HB! Lots of if's and but's of course but worth a chance.

Spin a few plates. Its the best way to forget about her. Its obvious you really liked her but every time after I got rejected I learned my lessons and I'm now at a stage where I'm not the least bit worried about rejection and that means I'm more relaxed etc on the date.

Well I did end it that way but she's reacted in a very immature and childish manner lol.. I tried calling her from my number she didn't pick up so I just sent that message (no response from her obviously)

I wake up this morning and find that she's removed me from her friends on Facebook.. (was is something I said? haha)

All be it the story goes that I called her from the office (so no caller ID shown) 2 days ago and it rang twice then she pressed cancel so it went straight to voicemail, I rang straight back as I thought this was a mistake but after 1 ring the same thing happened.

Really I should have left it there as she did that on purpose but for some unknown reason I assumed she was just busy at that exact time so couldn't answer. So I tried again 10mins later (no answer)

She obviously must have assumed that the calls were from me so I guess the magnitude of the number of calls (even though she doesn't know it's me for sure but suspects it was) has completely put her off and devalues my rejection message and offer of friendship?

Is this normal behavior with what appears to be 'normal' girls..? I mean she seemed pleasant and fine on the date.. now she's acting like some crazy b1tch and making me look out to be some kind of stalker or something by removing me from her friends list as retaliation..

I guess the fact that those calls coupled with the fact she had not seen my email from a couple days before till after my calls compounds the number of times I've contacted her even though chronologically that was sent like 4 days ago..

I guess I made a further mistake of sending her a FB message telling her she's being immature but I won't hold it against her and that my offer of friendship still stands.

I just wanted to be the bigger man and mature one for once yet felt compelled to tell her off for removing me when I felt I did nothing wrong but be a nice guy. Clearly a mistake right?

Should I just block her on facebook now without giving her a chance to respond to me..? as I think it's pretty much over and the last thing I would want is her badmouthing me to other people and passing my photo around.

 

[DonGorgon]

Yes very true but I felt she was sitting on the fence a little, as in had some interest but not so much, indifference if you like.

Well if she is more comfortable on the fence than on your **** then I say next...