Every thing BeExcellent said is spot on, but I'm tired of giving women special treatment. They certainly don't give us a free pass if we can't perform, lol. Hell no they don't, they are ruthless. Yet we are expected to prop them up and coddle them so it makes it easier for them to climax??? We are supposed to take the blame if they can't get off. How about figure it out on your own time. Letting women blame everybody else for their problems is how we got in this big mess to begin with.
The best type of woman to have secks with is one that doesn't need all sorts of mental/emotional foreplay before hand. She will have multiple orgasms every time with out all of that and yes they do exist. I've had several. The best women can come klitorally, vaginally, and anally and what a pleasure they are to have secks with. Her pu$$y will be wet before you even drop her panties, she will turn into your personal little p0rnstar. She will know her body well and won't have many insecurities. She will be confident walking around with her clothes off. And they will have watched a few adult videos in their life.
A lot of women would do themselves a favor if they watched some p0rn....yeah that's how we like to have secks. I'm tired of every thing being about them! What I've noticed about older women(over 35) is they tend to get this. They finally understand men better and don't need as much emotional/mental stimulation to climax.
The intent of this thread was not to shame, blame or point fingers.
I completely understand everything Howie is saying and I agree with it. But a good woman absolutely will give a pass if a man can't perform IF she really likes him/is in love with him.
My intention wasn't to infer that men have to do everything for women AT ALL, but
being a great lover is a skill set.
Women that REALLY appreciate sex (and they are out there, myself included) are not going to settle for a crappy experience just as men won't (shouldn't settle for) women who don't like sex, are prude, frigid, etc. It's a two way street.
All I'm saying is that a GREAT lover is not selfish in bed in the sense that a great lover has confidence and sufficient self knowledge to share his or her needs and sexual desires with a partner AND is communicative/patient if the partner perhaps doesn't know everything about himself or herself. A woman who will give you total access to her body, has confidence in herself naked and will be your own personal p0rn star is GIVING to you sexually. She is open to you and wants to please you as well as herself. She is giving you a full experience. Men should aspire to do this as well. Selfish sex is disappointing for men and for women.
But let's face it. There are lots of things I see going on in this community and some of them are contradictions.
I'll make a list:
1. Guys promote young women with low or no partner counts for LTR or relationship. OK that's great, but these women are not going to have much sexual experience and they are going to be the self conscious ones and the more insecure ones as a by-product of that inexperience. These women may not fully know their own bodies. Maybe they have never had sex...maybe they have never had GOOD sex. If a man understands how to create a comfortable environment for sex to occur and understands how to help her learn her own body (it's not something women automatically learn along the way) then isn't this beneficial?
2. Lots of the guys here do not want to LTR or wife up promiscuous women but its well know that the promiscuous women are less inhibited and more experienced in bed and aren't going to have the hang ups of the less experienced women. OK that's great. Get over her partner count or whatever, enjoy yourself, and if she turns out to be a cool person why not pursue something more than a few bangs? A girl with experience is someone you might be able to really have mind blowing experiences with.
3. If you don't care about being a better lover for your own enjoyment, and if you don't care about your partner's enjoyment, then keep doing what you are doing. OK but don't complain when women ghost you after sex. A woman may not be able to climax with one man but then climax easily with another man... I would suggest if Howie is having success with multi climax women there are two things going on. First he is with a woman who knows herself, second he is a man who understands sex such that he gives her the right stimulation to get there as well as get himself there. It's both people contributing to the experience.
4. For the guys who plan never to LTR or marry, why wouldn't you want to learn a skill set that will give you more sexual knowledge, confidence and prowess in bed? Why not learn the skills to really enjoy your body and her body and the depth possible in a sexual encounter? I will say that true depth improves with knowledge of a consistent partner. So the kitty carousel is only going to get you so far down that road.
Truly deep sexual intimacy requires emotional intimacy as well as physical intimacy. Sex can be a spiritual experience and deeply moving experience with deep emotional bonding but the full deep and spiritual experience remains reserved for couples who can create great intimacy together. That means trust, respect, play, and deep emotional investment. Great intimacy, including great sexual depth and intimacy, is the glue that holds happily married couples together. It isn't really possible to build this level of intimacy outside a deeply committed LTR or marriage. That's one of the rewards reserved for such deeply committed relationships.
I aspire to being a great lover and to satisfying my partner fully in bed. I think it's something worth aspiring to. It's something I'm proud of and the original idea behind the thread was to encourage men to aspire to that as well so there is more understanding about what it means to be a great lover and create enjoyable sexual experiences. I also aspire to deep intimacy and this is what I'd eventually like to be able to build with someone.
