How to act with female friends?

[LTG71]

Exactly. They are hoping he gets the hint they don't want to be around him but he doesn't seem to.

I mean how do you tell someone "I don't want to be around you, stop bothering me!"?

Most women aren't going to do that, they will treat you like crap and hope you have some self respect for yourself and get the hint

Women surely use this tactic if they are not interested and expect you to take the hint.

If it‘s a long time acquaintance, then you’re not high on their priority list or they don’t need anything at the moment.

I think the only ones I would consider “friends“ are reciprocal. There is some gave and take and not all take. Most women keep men around as service providers.

 

[Bokanovsky]

Lately, I've had the opportunity to make some female friends. And I mean friend-only because I think that having female friends could be good for my SMV, and also facilitate the process of meeting plates.

But I noticed that you can't really be friends with women because when I act the same as I do with my male friends, they start to treat me like ****. They're gonna start doing **** like:

1. Take forever to reply to messages.
2. Only contact me when they need something.
3. Ghost me.
4. **** test me.
5. Disrespect me in public.

I thought that if I'm not ****ing them, I might as well let loose and open up more. For example, I tend to share stuff about myself quite a bit and also ask them a lot of questions to learn about them. Basically, I'm applying "How to Win Friends and Influence People".

But I'm thinking that I should be treating them the same as women I'm ****ing. Basically, treat them like ****, leave their messages on "seen", and don't share anything about myself. But then, I won't be having any female friends but instead, they'd just be classified as "women I'm not ****ing".

To me, it looks like if you let your guard down around women, their nature is to **** you up.

Can you guys share how you handle female friendships?

Women have three types of male "friends":

1. Guys they secretly have a crush on. This is the only kind of male friend that a woman would genuinely be "nice" to.
2. Orbiters (a.k.a. unpaid servants). A woman would only keep an orbiter around if she could extract some form of value from him.
3. Gay friends (a.k.a. free entertainment). Modern women find homosexuals amusing and entertaining. In the old days, kings and nobles surrounded themselves with jesters, midgets and other entertainers. Homosexuals fill that role in contemporary society.

It sounds like you fall in category #2. They are ghosting you because you're not doing anything for them.

 

[zekko]

You act like you want to fvck them and don't apologize for it.

Good answer, provided that is what you really want.

Also, true friends are rare. True female friends are even rarer.

 

[HaleyBaron]

This cannot be stressed enough. Do not treat them like your male friends. They expect attention and other stupid stuff like a female friend. You are not that. You are a man who does his own things and is too busy for small children stuff that women tend to do. You don't watch Netflix every night cause you are building a business or lifting at the gym. You don't care who Usher is ****ing cause you're ****ing someone already. And again, have better things to do. This mindset must remain valiant to keep you straight.

Even I have to keep myself in line when dealing with female acquaintances. Sometimes, that honor comes up to try to make me care for them more but then I remember that they are only seeking attention you are not giving them.

 

[Travel memoir21]

How to act with female friends?

Be the same dorky, awkward, Afc and funny dude you are without any expectations....and you got yourself a friend. lol

 

[kenpiffyjr]

I have a few female friends - and it’s really just an undertone of they both would sleep with me but I’m taken situation.

My BM is pretty much my bottom chick and they know her and been around her. They come to my son’s bday parties, etc. They fling under the veil of “sisters” but their “babying” of me I would say would reveal to a professional what the real deal is. I just play the aloof and stoic role to my bm when she actually knows their agenda and it’s never an issue.

I don’t believe this “no female friend” rule or box. There is absolutely a frame of confidence and abundance that you can have in experiencing friendships with women…YOU can have, but likely if you are [as a cool heterosexual man I might add], they’d smash you if they got the opportunity so there is some fine text with it I do agree.

 

[Vending Machine Veteran]

You shouldn't have female friends

As you get older, you will learn

 

[Vanderdonck]

Like all females, flirt, tease, neg. A good number of my female friends have made a move on me.

 

[BackInTheGame78]

Your strategy is wrong and they treat you like this because they know that you actually want to fvck them but don't have the balls to tell them or make a move so you are seen as weak by them.

 

[Ricky]

I work in healthcare with a bunch of women. One of my good friends is a woman who is a former stripper.

I had met her husband while she was married and I never really was attracted to her. In particular her nasally voice is a turnoff.

She is a fun friend to go out with but predictably makes terrible choices in men and likes men that barely need to shave their face. If she was a teacher she'd probably be one of those that makes the news haha.

Sometimes its just toxic and tiring to be her friend, other times its amusing. I doubt she is a great wing girl because people assume we are a couple but if you want to have a few drinks and eat she is fun.

 

[Chow Mein]

A lot to unpack here, so I’ll just hit a few points.

Female friends have nothing to do with your SMV. You should not care if she’s attracted to you or not. Or if your friendship with her attracts other chicks. That’s not the point of friendship.

You can’t treat them exactly the same as guy friends. Their interests are often not the same, and you can’t joke quite as crudely as you do with guys (most of the time lol).

Lastly, you don’t need to “game” them in any way. Things like push/pull or being a jerk sometimes are not applicable here.

Mostly, for friends, they just want a guy who is chill, understanding, and can listen. This is not the same as being a simp. You aren’t doing that to get in her pants or to get her to date you later on. You’re just socializing.

Overall, having female friends can be fun if you have the right ones. Once they are comfortable with you, you’d be shocked at some of the shyte they tell you, and that can give a deeper insight into how women think and operate.

Mikey! You keep getting in great situations, but you too AFC and let the moment slip!

Please post your experiences in the thread “Obvious come ons that were missed”. I learned so much from that HOF thread….

 

[Mike32ct]

Mikey! You keep getting in great situations, but you too AFC and let the moment slip!

Please post your experiences in the thread “Obvious come ons that were missed”. I learned so much from that HOF thread….

Haha. Yeah I had some funny ones I posted in the past. I shared them because it was stuff I learned the hard way.

I haven’t gotten any IOIs in quite a long time to miss or report.

 

[Chow Mein]

Haha. Yeah I had some funny ones I posted in the past. I shared them because it was stuff I learned the hard way.

I haven’t gotten any IOIs in quite a long time to miss or report.

Really appreciate it! Not gonna lie, I was like Shia LeBouf in a couple of them lol

Hope life is good for yoy, brotha.

 

[VirtuousD]

It's really rare to make genuine female friends, interests are just too dissimilar.

If you're part of a wider social circle where you know many of the same people i'd say it isn't too rare but on a 1-2-1 basis hanging out regularly yes very rare

 

[BadBoy89]

There is no such thing as "female friends" for a man. For a woman "male friends" exist, because a woman uses a man as a utility tool. But men don't need women they same way, they just need them for sex and babies.

Men just stay "friends" with women because they want to f their brains out when they get a chance.

Don't kid yourselves.

 

[Hal9000]

I've had female coworkers and acquaintances but I've never had one, as an adult, I'd put in the friend category. I mean I've hung out with women who were friends of friends on occasion but that's about it. Not sure trying to have some is worth the torment you appear to be putting yourself through, especially if you're just doing so they can ultimately help get you laid. Friends are supposed to be people you enjoy hanging out with and who you'd hope would have your back if the need ever arose. That's about it. When you try to turn friendship into a "what can they do for me" relationship you're heading down the wrong path on multiple levels.

 

[FlexpertHamilton]

Invest the time to improve yourself, so you become even less dependent in women giving you social proof.

Improving yourself is a meme, especially when it's done with the ulterior motive to increase your attraction to the opposite sex. Leveraging female friends as social proof is the most powerful method of improving attraction and any man who doesn't take advantage of it is making a mistake.

Plus, if you friendzone a woman off the bat you will demonstrate lack of thirst and it can lead to easy "incidental" lays.

The only problem is that many women will get offended at the mere suggestion of being friends, so if you're going to do it you best do it before you go on a single date and certainly not after having sex.

 

[PlatoPacks23]

Your strategy is wrong and they treat you like this because they know that you actually want to fvck them but don't have the balls to tell them or make a move so you are seen as weak by them.

I've definitely had situations where I've tried to make moves (ask them out) and it's a mixed response and I don't think any respect was gained lol.

 

[user252009]

I only socialise with female "friends" where I see the benefit of preselection of other women I'd wanna bang via these "friends"

 

[BadBoy89]

That's a bleak view.

And I know from personal experience that men can use women as a utility tool as well, just not with the promise of sex.

With what though?

Men can take care of themselves. Women can't. In my experience, if a man asks a woman for help, he would ask a semi attractive one with the possibility of sex. He wouldn't ask a menopausal woman with 2 kids.