How should I bring up to my GF that I don't like the thirst trap pics she posts on Snapchat

[Mbuckets82]

Draw the line. ‘Babe, i don’t want you to post those pics anymore.’ She stops, cool. She doesn’t, roll out. My guess is she’s gonna tell you you’re controlling and she can do what she wants.

 

[AwlaysFukedUp]

Sexually charged Snapchats? Are you getting that much of her sexual attention?

Yes. Things are usually great in person.

 

[soulforge]

Not sure why some guys think an attention ***** is going to all of a sudden stop being an AW. It’s similar to a woman who thinks she can change her man once they marry. This is all on you OP. Demote to plate status.

Exactly my thoughts.. Girls like this start attention whooring from a young age, when they realise there SMV they are almost addicted to the attention.

Why do we believe she will change over night.

 

[Georgepithyou]

Time to start searching for a new GF op

 

[sangheilios]

I haven't gone through all of the posts on this thread, but what I will be mentioning is based off of experiences and observations I've had of women I've met or known of over the years who are like this.

I'm not sure if this was mentioned somewhere on this thread, but you being 30 I'm going to assume that she is a 20 something. Most women in this age range grew up with social media and if she is attractive it is very likely that what you are seeing is a bad habit that developed years ago simply because it was the norm when she was in high school. You have to realize that the amount of attention that these women receive on social media is addicting in the sense that they receive so much validation from it, after all only a select few are actually making any money off of this. Virtually all attractive women that I know of in my area post on social media, much of it being attention grabbing photos like butt selfies or what have you.

With that said, there is a big difference between blatant habitual attention whoring on social media vs. occasionally dabbling in it. The women that I know who were and still are attention *****s on social media had deep insecurity issues and a need for external validation. There was one that I met at my gym 2 years ago, I stopped talking to a while ago, and her whole instagram was her literally in little thongs, ass selfies at the gym, etc. When I first met her she wasn't too outrageous but after I stopped talking to her I noticed she'd always wear these over the top revealing outfits, like shorts barely covering her butt and junk. She made a habit of leading on tons of men, constantly rotated dates, would have a new semi steady bf for a month or 2 at the most and would quickly bounce to another.

Without making this post too long winded, this is what you should take home from this. Women like this have some deep seated issues that will only change when THEY decide to work on them. Combine this with the fact that our current culture is encouraging this type of behavior it naturally allows it to get to an unhealthy degree like you are seeing. Another thing to consider is that women like this usually have friends that are just like them, which again encourages this type of behavior. Many of the postings you see on a hot woman's social media are more from other women feeding into the narcissism, it's like a big circle jerk. As others have said, women like this are also usually very immature and not really wifey/gf material and really should just be a side chick or a one night stand.

If you really think this is something you can work out by all means try, but it's good that you are already catching this now instead of deluding yourself into thinking that this is healthy.

 

[bcude]

This is like dating a girl with many male friends, only worse. The "for sale" sign is constantly at display.

You can't be exclusive with a girl like that.

"I don't think we're as compatible as i thought.." and then you walk.

 

[AwlaysFukedUp]

Well this is f*cking unbelievable. She messaged me on snap at 1030pm last night. Just saying "heyy". I messaged her back hey. 2.5 hours later I go to bed and she still hasn't seen/responded to the message. I figured she had just gone to bed. I wake up at 630am to piss and figure I'll check my phone. Bad f*cking idea. I see that she HAS seen the message, but didn't respond, and on top of that she had posted a snap at like 2 or 3am. I look at it and it's of two guys in her apartment and one is like holding/hugging her dog and the other is holding a beer.

Her story for rescheduling our date night yesterday to tonight was because she had to babysit. So this was at MOST a half-truth, and she MAYBE babysat, but hungout with people after. And on top of that she's acting weird as f*ck, said "heyy" then nothing else, and posted that bizarre snap at 2-3am.

Yeah. This is looking bad. We definitely need to have a talk about what in the f*ck is going on. And now I can't go back to f*cking sleep.

 

[AwlaysFukedUp]

I see another snap from 6 hours ago. I'm not sure why it didn't come through with the other one. It's her recording several friends in her apartment, including this one particular girlfriend, and there's music and drinking and etc. I think these people are all friends of this girlfriend. But my thing is... If she's going to party and have a good time with some friends, why would she not invite me over? And further than that, why would she tell me babysitting is the reason she had to reschedule our date? Because it sure as hell looks like she's been partying most of the night.

 

[oldmanofthesea]

Damn, that went south quick. You don’t “need to have a talk” with her at this point. This is a woman who clearly is not relationship material. I stand by my previous points about the pros and cons of talking vs not talking to her about the PREVIOUS Snapchat behavior but now that she has flaked on your date, lied about it to you, then disrespected you by posting pics and video of her partying with other dudes, you should be dust in the wind.

If you have ANY self respect, you will not “talk” to her about what happened last night. Do not give her the satisfaction... she wants that. This is a really troubled girl who will savor your tears and angst, because to her, it is another form of attention and validation. She pinged you with “heyy” last night just to ensure you would see her snaps that she deliberately posted to get a reaction out of you. Do NOT take the bait. Do not show anger, disappointment or that you are affected in any way.

I would simply not initiate contact with her again. I’d wait for her to double text me and when she did i would wait hours to respond and when I did, I’d say something like, “Hey, I’ve not really been feeling things between us for a while and feel our time has run its course. You’re not quite what I’m looking for.” And then just ignore any response or attempt to comment. Do NOT justify your departure and do NOT bring up any of her snapchats or the date flaking. She is not an idiot and knows FULL WELL what she is doing because she is doing it intentionally. She will try to manipulate you by playing dumb and making excuses. Don’t fall for it. It’s over. I’m really sorry this happened to you... most of us have been in similar situations and it’s always difficult at first. But please learn from us and this experience and take the advice. And in the future, be wary of girls who are at the far end of the attention wh0re spectrum. You can sleep with them but they aren’t relationship material and you’ve now seen why.

If you don’t take this advice, she will manipulate you by lying about the circumstances surrounding last night, and she will see you as weak and stupid. She will likely start cheating on you (assuming she isn’t already) and instead of dumping you, will continue rubbing her cheating in your face while she savors your hurt reactions and anger until you finally can’t take it any more. Again, please do not give this girl the satisfaction.

 

[RangerMIke]

I'm 99% sure she doesn't think anything of the things she posts bothering me, because I've never brought it up or even commented on it. I don't react in any way to her sexually charged snapchat posts.

You are kidding yourself... but okay... let's assume you are right. She doesn't know it bothers you. There are two ways to handle this:

(1) Sit down and have a chick-like discussion about how you 'feel' and communicate to her how much that 'hurts' you, then ask that she stop.
(2) Walk away.

Her is what she will think:

(1) "Oh my God! He's trying to control me! Does he think I'm his property? I guess now he's going to get angry or cry... Okay.... I'll tell him I will stop and start looking for reasons to break up with him... after all I have all these guys panting over my pics... he is replaceable.

(2) "What happened to AwlaysFukedUp, could it be he didn't like my bootie pics on Instagram?"

With (1) you are OUT... it might happen right then and there as she tosses it back in your face, which is actually the best option... or worst... she'll start torturing you demanding reciprocity... she WILL be demanding something in return, and you need to be prepared to pay that price.

With (2), she will either stop (unlikely) and reach back out to you... Or she will not give a sh1t that you walked away.

Bottom-line you DO have to communicate with her that what she is doing ticks you off all we are arguing about is METHOD.

 

[Focal core]

Good to see posting like this, getting to see what are the relationship with A/W looks like..

 

[AwlaysFukedUp]

Like why the f*** would she text me last night saying hey during this partying, then totally not respond at all after? And I still haven't heard anything from her.

 

[Focal core]

Or maybe if she values him enough she will conform herself to him. But I could definitely be wrong, I don't know this girl or him. Women will change themselves for you if they value you enough. They'll do it quickly too.

Particularly true, a women 100% into you will come with respect toward her man.

 

[Focal core]

Damaged women connect emotionally better than normal.

By mirroring the guy personallity, she could be well experienced enought guessing their guy liking and preferences.

 

[oldmanofthesea]

Like why the f*** would she text me last night saying hey during this partying, then totally not respond at all after? And I still haven't heard anything from her.

I explained that to you in my last reply. Also, why are you waiting to hear from her?

 

[mrgoodstuff]

By mirroring the guy personallity, she could be well experienced enought guessing their guy liking and preferences.

Is it always people they like. I've seen a lady mirror alot of the actions of a guy in a group. She wanted to be part of the group. He was the loudest Talker.

 

[Focal core]

Is it always people they like. I've seen a lady mirror alot of the actions of a guy in a group. She wanted to be part of the group. He was the loudest Talker.

That even fvkup up

 

[mrgoodstuff]

That even fvkup up

She would matrix transform to whichever group she interface with. She wanted to be liked and did things that are way out of character. I could see she was good at playing "roles".

 

[CBear]

Well this is f*cking unbelievable.

How is it unbelievable when everyone here was telling you that this is bad news from experience? This is what happens to guys who try to rationalize that everything is fine or that things are different. Sleepless nights for them while everyone else saw it from a mile away.

Like why the f*** would she text me last night saying hey during this partying, then totally not respond at all after? And I still haven't heard anything from her.

Cause she's playing you and you don't have enough self respect to take action due to wanting a relationship. It's only gonna get more frustrating with more headaches should you choose to deal with this for some reason.

 

[Focal core]

She would matrix transform to whichever group she interface with. She wanted to be liked and did things that are way out of character. I could see she was good at playing "roles".

They type of person that you cant trust, she will flip out once better deal comes along.