How should I bring up to my GF that I don't like the thirst trap pics she posts on Snapchat

[MatureDJ]

Quit dating tramps.

 

[mrgoodstuff]

I've posted about this before. Women cannot pair bond these days. If they are halfway decent looking, they will continue to hunt for a man higher on the LMS scale. They are hypergamous by nature and only the rule of patriarchy can keep them in check to some degree.

As christianity and patriarchy continue to erode, these types of problems will only get worse.

Hell, even Christianity they are skirting around the true natures.

 

[Clamslammer]

My close friend's GF is a major social media attention wh0re. The funniest part to me is that she has HIM take her ass-out pics, that she then posts online. I just face-palm when I see it.

You'd be surprised how many dudes do this, these guys think they are showing off their girl to other people but in reality she is marketing herself so she can replace him and the loser bf is facilitating it. SMH

 

[Clamslammer]

She's randomly posted mirror selfie "look at my ass" thirst trap-esque pics (once every week or two) ever since I've known her, which was fine early on since she was single, but now we're exclusive and she's still doing it just as much or more than ever. And this week she's really going for it...

Wednesday night she posted an ass selfie in short shorts with the caption "bed time", and last night she posted a video of herself swinging around on her pole dancing pole with the song "crazy *****" playing in the background and wearing short shorts that she had rolled up further, so her ass cheeks were hanging out (they were rolled up enough so that about half her ass was showing).

I don't care if she takes pics/vids like this, but it bothers me that she's sharing them publicly--especially on snapchat. First of all, it makes me think she might secretly be very insecure and requires constant attention from random people, including random people of the opposite sex, for validation. And more importantly, I'm sure she has other guys on her friends list who see these vids. And being a guy I know how guys think and what they'll try to do when they see this stuff. What bothers me the most is that she's deliberately showing herself in a sexual manner publicly on snapchat and is putting herself in a position where she'll get hit on by other guys when she's already committed to me.

I really, REALLY like this girl, we have a ton of real emotional and personality chemistry that I've only ever felt a couple other times in my decade+ of dating, and I want to make this work, but I don't know what to make of this. I'm not sure how to bring this up in a non-combative way.

Simple, AW are not relationship material. She isn't a homely girl you can bring home to your family. Keep her as a side piece and keep it moving and find a quality girl.

 

[Trez]

Either dump her and move on or directly tell her you're not ok with it because it's extremely disrespectful to you and your relationship. Be direct.

 

[Trez]

Nothing you can do or say to her that will make a difference. If you don't like it and it bothers you, dump her.

You are operating under the assumption that she doesn't know this bothers you. Trust me she does, and she is doing it anyway. Think on that and decide if she is worth your trouble.

But she might not know how much it bothers him and its possible she thinks he's cool with it because she might not have them considered his feelings about it. It's possible if he tells her it's not ok that she might stop. Sometimes you can directly establish boundaries with women and its ok you know.

 

[BackInTheGame78]

Answering a few questions...

1.) No, she isn't the hottest girl I've ever been with. I'm certainly attracted to her, but she's also certainly not the hottest by a fairly long stretch. On the other hand, I'm objectively more physically attractive than her ex boyfriend who she was with for 2.5 years. But all I know about him is what he looks like. Nothing else.

2.) By "chemistry" I mean emotional/personality chemistry. Yeah, the sexual chemistry is fantastic, but the emotional/personality chemistry is what got me hooked and made "us" feel special.

3.) I don't want to cheat. It's a scumbag thing to do, especially when you're the one who initiated the exclusivity of the relationship (which I did).

We're supposed to hangout tomorrow and I want to bring this up. I don't mind her posting a body pic to show off her hard work once in a while, but like someone else in here said, the consistent posting of them as well as the pole dancing vid with half her ass hanging out of her shorts and "crazy b!tch" playing in the background while obviously trying to look as sexy as possible was over the top.



Her last relationship was 2.5 years and it wasn't that long ago. She's also been in LTR's longer than she's been single, so I don't think she's a wh0re.

That's the problem right there in #3. YOU initiated the exclusivity. YOU entered her frame and are still in it. YOU care more about the relationship than she does meaning SHE has the power and feels she can do what she wants because she knows she has you.

Wild Stallions don't run into a barn and lock the door willingly. Giant mistake that you might not be able to recover from.

If you want sit her down and talk to her about and then let her know if she continues to do it you will walk and actually mean it and follow through with it when you find out 8 months from now she has still been doing it under a private account you don't have access to, because she will continue to do it...attention is like crack to her and she is addicted to it.

 

[Bible_Belt]

Sit her down and have a serious talk. It goes like this:

The free snapchat is just a teaser for the paid snapchat, which is just another teaser to make more money through selling lingerie, cam time, etc as well as soliciting donations. If she'd just put a little work into it, then both of you can quit your day jobs. It's time to stop giving it away for free and make some money.

 

[soulforge]

Either dump her and move on or directly tell her you're not ok with it because it's extremely disrespectful to you and your relationship. Be direct.

What will directly telling her achieve? Everything she has ever done and known is attention whooring, she is going to suddenly drop all that, because of a conversation with this simp?

She knows he's a straight up chump, that's why she has the balls to do it.

 

[Trez]

Answering a few questions...

1.) No, she isn't the hottest girl I've ever been with. I'm certainly attracted to her, but she's also certainly not the hottest by a fairly long stretch. On the other hand, I'm objectively more physically attractive than her ex boyfriend who she was with for 2.5 years. But all I know about him is what he looks like. Nothing else.

2.) By "chemistry" I mean emotional/personality chemistry. Yeah, the sexual chemistry is fantastic, but the emotional/personality chemistry is what got me hooked and made "us" feel special.

3.) I don't want to cheat. It's a scumbag thing to do, especially when you're the one who initiated the exclusivity of the relationship (which I did).

We're supposed to hangout tomorrow and I want to bring this up. I don't mind her posting a body pic to show off her hard work once in a while, but like someone else in here said, the consistent posting of them as well as the pole dancing vid with half her ass hanging out of her shorts and "crazy b!tch" playing in the background while obviously trying to look as sexy as possible was over the top.



Her last relationship was 2.5 years and it wasn't that long ago. She's also been in LTR's longer than she's been single, so I don't think she's a wh0re.

If this is the case your best bet is to communicate to her that is disrespectful to you and your relationship and if she values you she will stop doing it. Her reaction will tell you everything you need to know to make the decision on whether to next her or not. You know what to do. Good luck.

 

[Trez]

What will directly telling her achieve? Everything she ever has done and known on regards to attention whooring, she is going to suddenly drop, because of a conversation with this simp?

She knows he's a straight up chump, that's why she has the balls to do it.

Depends on how much she values him and their relationship. At minimum it will give him the information he needs to decide on whether to dump her or not. It can't hurt because either she'll stop or he'll dump her.

Also I'd suggest he does it right after sex.

 

[RangerMIke]

But she might not know how much it bothers him and its possible she thinks he's cool with it because she might not have them considered his feelings about it. It's possible if he tells her it's not ok that she might stop. Sometimes you can directly establish boundaries with women and its ok you know.

You are confusing her knowing it bothers him and if she actually cares that it bothers him. I am not one to deal in absolutes, so let's just say that if a chick is dating you... she knows what you like and what you don't like. They are a lot more intuitive than the average male.

I am 90% sure she knows it bothers him... unless she is a crazy @ss b1tch. I am also 90% sure she does not care that it does. So simple math tell me that I am 95% sure this chick is not right for him.

Now I do agree that there is a 5% chance that she thinks he is okay with this and cares that he does... If she is one of these 5% of women, then the best way to find out is if he walks away from her... because if she is one of these these she will come back. This is the only way to set, so called 'boundaries'. It's not like she is the only fvcking chick in the world... the OP should go look for one that is not an Instagram seeking attention vampire.

 

[Mazer]

Not sure why some guys think an attention ***** is going to all of a sudden stop being an AW. It’s similar to a woman who thinks she can change her man once they marry. This is all on you OP. Demote to plate status.

 

[Trez]

You are confusing her knowing it bothers him and if she actually cares that it bothers him. I am not one to deal in absolutes, so let's just say that if a chick is dating you... she knows what you like and what you don't like. They are a lot more intuitive than the average male.

I am 90% sure she knows it bothers him... unless she is a crazy @ss b1tch. I am also 90% sure she does not care that it does. So simple math tell me that I am 95% sure this chick is not right for him.

Now I do agree that there is a 5% chance that she thinks he is okay with this and cares that he does... If she is one of these 5% of women, then the best way to find out is if he walks away from her... because if she is one of these these she will come back. This is the only way to set, so called 'boundaries'. It's not like she is the only fvcking chick in the world... the OP should go look for one that is not an Instagram seeking attention vampire.

Hey but if they've never talked about it and he's never stated it bothers him along with the fact it's very normal for women to participate in this kind of behavior it's possible she thinks what she's doing is totally normal and ok.

She might even think that it bothers him a little bit might not realize the extent of bothers him. If this whole time he's been acting like he is cool with it, then she might think just that.

Regardless if she's values the relationship, and like op said, a big reason he caught feelings for her is her personality and how she behaves it'll be worth it to him to talk to her and if her personality is solid she might just alter her behavior so she doesn't lose him.

But maybe she knows it's making him feel insecure and is a big b1tch and does it anyways. Women will definitely do sh1t their partner doesn't like just to be a b1tch sometimes. Or she just doesn't care about him.

Either way it can't hurt op to say something because who cares if she judges him for it, either she'll stop doing it or op will get rid of her. At least by saying something he knows exactly where he stands with her

 

[HyenaPrince]

Not sure why some guys think an attention ***** is going to all of a sudden stop being an AW. It’s similar to a woman who thinks she can change her man once they marry. This is all on you OP. Demote to plate status.

Exactly. I wouldn't even be surprised if she came up with some bullsh*t excuse like "I'm insecure about my body and want to feel good by posting it." Damn, women know how to make even the most ridiculous situations look rational.

You need to take a step back every once in a while and look at the bigger picture. Only then are you able to see her games and her unstable nature.

 

[Trez]

Exactly. I wouldn't even be surprised if she came up with some bullsh*t excuse like "I'm insecure about my body and want to feel good by posting it." Damn, women know how to make even the most ridiculous situations look rational.

You need to take a step back every once in a while and look at the bigger picture. Only then are you able to see her games and her unstable nature.

Or maybe if she values him enough she will conform herself to him. But I could definitely be wrong, I don't know this girl or him. Women will change themselves for you if they value you enough. They'll do it quickly too.

 

[RangerMIke]

Hey but if they've never talked about it and he's never stated it bothers him along with the fact it's very normal for women to participate in this kind of behavior it's possible she thinks what she's doing is totally normal and ok.

She might even think that it bothers him a little bit might not realize the extent of bothers him. If this whole time he's been acting like he is cool with it, then she might think just that.

Regardless if she's values the relationship, and like op said, a big reason he caught feelings for her is her personality and how she behaves it'll be worth it to him to talk to her and if her personality is solid she might just alter her behavior so she doesn't lose him.

But maybe she knows it's making him feel insecure and is a big b1tch and does it anyways. Women will definitely do sh1t their partner doesn't like just to be a b1tch sometimes. Or she just doesn't care about him.

Either way it can't hurt op to say something because who cares if she judges him for it, either she'll stop doing it or op will get rid of her. At least by saying something he knows exactly where he stands with her

Okay.... really why bother with all this... sure it is possible that this chick is completely clueless or crazy... and she does not know that seeking attention from other men MIGHT bother her boyfriend. Think about that for a minute..... okay.... now that you have thought on this. Ask this.... is this the only fvcking chick in the whole fvcking world? If you had a girlfriend... do you think she just MIGHT, just might be bothered by you trying to gain the attention of other women?

You communicate with women EMOTIONALLY, any other way is a waste of time.... sure there are a handful of women that can evaluate things rationally, but most of these are older or rare. Having rational discussions with them is a waste of time. Sharing how you 'feel' and trying to set boundaries only makes you look weak.... which dries her up.

Trust me... just dump her.... if she REALLY cares about you and likes you... she will be back. If not there re 4 billion other women in the world and you should stop wasting your time with one that is only going to make your live a living hell.

 

[AwlaysFukedUp]

Okay.... really why bother with all this... sure it is possible that this chick is completely clueless or crazy... and she does not know that seeking attention from other men MIGHT bother her boyfriend. Think about that for a minute..... okay.... now that you have thought on this. Ask this.... is this the only fvcking chick in the whole fvcking world? If you had a girlfriend... do you think she just MIGHT, just might be bothered by you trying to gain the attention of other women?

You communicate with women EMOTIONALLY, any other way is a waste of time.... sure there are a handful of women that can evaluate things rationally, but most of these are older or rare. Having rational discussions with them is a waste of time. Sharing how you 'feel' and trying to set boundaries only makes you look weak.... which dries her up.

Trust me... just dump her.... if she REALLY cares about you and likes you... she will be back. If not there re 4 billion other women in the world and you should stop wasting your time with one that is only going to make your live a living hell.

I'm 99% sure she doesn't think anything of the things she posts bothering me, because I've never brought it up or even commented on it. I don't react in any way to her sexually charged snapchat posts.

 

[mrgoodstuff]

Okay.... really why bother with all this... sure it is possible that this chick is completely clueless or crazy... and she does not know that seeking attention from other men MIGHT bother her boyfriend. Think about that for a minute..... okay.... now that you have thought on this. Ask this.... is this the only fvcking chick in the whole fvcking world? If you had a girlfriend... do you think she just MIGHT, just might be bothered by you trying to gain the attention of other women?

You communicate with women EMOTIONALLY, any other way is a waste of time.... sure there are a handful of women that can evaluate things rationally, but most of these are older or rare. Having rational discussions with them is a waste of time. Sharing how you 'feel' and trying to set boundaries only makes you look weak.... which dries her up.

Trust me... just dump her.... if she REALLY cares about you and likes you... she will be back. If not there re 4 billion other women in the world and you should stop wasting your time with one that is only going to make your live a living hell.

In 2020 the attention wh0ring goes "back and forth" if both are aware. If one keeps complaining they will keep getting "hit" by it. Many of these ladies had guys do them the same way. So they do it in turn.

 

[mrgoodstuff]

I'm 99% sure she doesn't think anything of the things she posts bothering me, because I've never brought it up or even commented on it. I don't react in any way to her sexually charged snapchat posts.

Sexually charged Snapchats? Are you getting that much of her sexual attention?