How often do women reach out to you?

user252009

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I've learned that women essentially almost never reach out to me by themselves. If I contact them, they'll usually respond etc., but usually, they orbit but never reach out.
 

HaleyBaron

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It means you provide nothing of value to them. Women and men will contact who they consider someone they wish to be out with. Sometimes they may assume you are too busy and have anxiety. That is a factor, too. But usually your first guess is the correct one. We're still human and we can tell differences in social attraction.
 

manfrombelow

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I've learned that women essentially almost never reach out to me by themselves. If I contact them, they'll usually respond etc., but usually, they orbit but never reach out.
Only if you are perceived as low quality by said women.

Imagine if you were Brad Pitt, would you think they would still "never reach out" to you "by themselves"?

As of now, I am oftenly contacted by a chick that is obviously very into me, but she's a 4/10 so I don't really give a fvck.
 

user252009

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It means you provide nothing of value to them. Women and men will contact who they consider someone they wish to be out with. Sometimes they may assume you are too busy and have anxiety. That is a factor, too. But usually your first guess is the correct one. We're still human and we can tell differences in social attraction.
I have a decent job, a creative and up-and-coming side career, nice place, live in a good city, travel often, what else do they want lol. OK, I'm average looks, but nothing much (apart from workout and grooming, which I already do) I can do about that
 

manfrombelow

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I have a decent job, a creative and up-and-coming side career, nice place, live in a good city, travel often, what else do they want lol. OK, I'm average looks, but nothing much (apart from workout and grooming, which I already do) I can do about that
Like I said, maybe it's time you change your target by quickly moving from women who perceive you as "lower" than them and start hitting on other women. Never get stuck with the same women who won't give you their time and attention.
 

HaleyBaron

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I have a decent job, a creative and up-and-coming side career, nice place, live in a good city, travel often, what else do they want lol. OK, I'm average looks, but nothing much (apart from workout and grooming, which I already do) I can do about that
I made a thread explaining a similar situation I went through in the Mature Man forum. The summary is that people care about what you can do for them. And yes, this sometimes means accepting that people are very superficial and egotistic. And money doesnt give happiness. In fact, it can make people resent you. So don't flaunt it to most people. Instead, you have to come off as someone reasonable to be around and also not suck the fun out of things. You also need a different energy to yourself.

 

Old Balls

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They don't reach out to me first either. It's happened but not very often. Usually a fwb situation, but girls I meet and am trying to get in with never do. I chalk it up to dating apps and the over-saturation of options that are constantly bombarding them. They don't have time to think about you and me (or anyone that isn't providing the value they want at that given time) unless we push our way to the front of the line with said value somehow. That's the part I hate.
 

HaleyBaron

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They don't reach out to me first either. It's happened but not very often. Usually a fwb situation, but girls I meet and am trying to get in with never do. I chalk it up to dating apps and the over-saturation of options that are constantly bombarding them. They don't have time to think about you and me (or anyone that isn't providing the value they want at that given time) unless we push our way to the front of the line with said value somehow. That's the part I hate.
This is very important. I've noticed women being a lot more turn-offish on men than ever before, and it's because they have someone on their phone ready to go to. Basically, they have a lot of get out of jail free cards through online dating, and as a result, they dont take interactions very seriously much. If a girl ever pulls out her cellphone while she is talking to you, that's guy #2 she is with, or her girls ready to tell her to come with them to another scene. Girls be flaky even in your face.
 

Glassguy

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Women reach out to me often. Its common for them to send me a friends request on fb and then send me a message. Or I add them and they send me a message.

Normally I will have 5+ women that will reach out to me through messenger or text. Some I have already slept with but most are women that I may have chatted with momentarily and then I stopped responding to them. So they send me the "hey stranger" or "How have you been" texts.

I will tell you its MUCH easier to get laid when you have women messaging you. It takes most of the work right out of it.
 

Modern Man Advice

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It means you provide nothing of value to them. Women and men will contact who they consider someone they wish to be out with. Sometimes they may assume you are too busy and have anxiety. That is a factor, too. But usually your first guess is the correct one. We're still human and we can tell differences in social attraction.
Spot on. Enough said.

Modern Man Advice
 

SirBigBell

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In this modern age we live in, where women are saturated with male attention 24-7 on social media and dating platforms, they’re too busy managing the traffic of simps in their inboxes to proactively initiate contact with guys, particularly those they consider of lower value.

To handle the situation you either have to become a circus monkey to be noticed or just live your life on your own terms.
 
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derby1

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OP this has been discussed many times, the issue is you are no different than the other 6's or 7's in her DMs.

so I may be better looking and more ripped than guy B, but Guy B has a three bedroom house and new Merc. were both then an overall 6-7

you have to be the local Bruce wayne in her eyes, to get her to simp
 

bat soup

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Why would you want women to reach out to you anyway? If you are interested, you're the one that should make something happen and if they like you enough they'll follow your lead. If they don't want to follow your lead and do what you want to do with them, then them reaching out has zero value.
 

PRW63

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I've learned that women essentially almost never reach out to me by themselves. If I contact them, they'll usually respond etc., but usually, they orbit but never reach out.
The good ones don't. It isn't their job. Their job is to orbit, your job is to demonstrat competence with women and proving yourself by making use of the opportunity they give you. Chasing is a feminine trait, and orbiting is how they do it. Society won't acknowledge that truth,...women won't acknowledge that truth,...but it is true. Men's job is to respond to it by choosing from the pool of women who make themselves available to the guy. That is why PUAs have it all wrong. The PUA goes through all kinds of studying, seminars, training, and paracticing,...for what??? To "get the girl". To chase women who don't want them,...and then fool, trick, or convince her that she wants him. I consider it to be just "Advanced SIMPing" disguised as self-improvment, game, and skills. The woman is his goal,...women are their main focus above all else. But what is one of the famous RP truths??? "A Woman should be an addition to your life,...never the focus" [Richard Cooper]
 

CAPSLOCK BANDIT

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Lately it's been nuts I been getting hit up like crazy women I haven't spoken to in 5+ years out of the blue
 

Just because a woman listens to you and acts interested in what you say doesn't mean she really is. She might just be acting polite, while silently wishing that the date would hurry up and end, or that you would go away... and never come back.

Quote taken from The SoSuave Guide to Women and Dating, which you can read for FREE.

Alvafe

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I hardly have people reaching out to me, but one thing I always notice when they do is asking IF I can talk now, every time, I also was acused of being misterious, and that is something I don't even bother to try.

but end game is always people will reach out to you when they need something from you, so sometimes they not doing it means they won't get anything from you, it can be a good thing too, the very least they don't think you are easy to string along
 

Knight of Roses

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Women reach out to me often. Its common for them to send me a friends request on fb and then send me a message. Or I add them and they send me a message.

Normally I will have 5+ women that will reach out to me through messenger or text. Some I have already slept with but most are women that I may have chatted with momentarily and then I stopped responding to them. So they send me the "hey stranger" or "How have you been" texts.

I will tell you its MUCH easier to get laid when you have women messaging you. It takes most of the work right out of it.
Stop rubbing it in, you lucky mf.

lol
 

SW15

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It means you provide nothing of value to them. Women and men will contact who they consider someone they wish to be out with. Sometimes they may assume you are too busy and have anxiety. That is a factor, too. But usually your first guess is the correct one. We're still human and we can tell differences in social attraction.
Correct!

I have a decent job, a creative and up-and-coming side career, nice place, live in a good city, travel often, what else do they want lol. OK, I'm average looks, but nothing much (apart from workout and grooming, which I already do) I can do about that
Women can make their own money and don't care about your job, unless you are top 1% of income/net worth.
 
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