How many of you dont pay on the First Date?

J Roc

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I have a strict policy about not paying on the first few dates. My first dates usually consist of a free event such as a concert,comedy show or movie in the park. Once I determine that a female is into me and not just a free meal then we can go out for dinner. I hate to see men wasting hundreds of dollars a week on females who dont even like them.
 

PrettyBoyAJ

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Usually my idea of a date is the girl coming to the crib and we watch some netflix.

However, When I have dated chicks in Atlanta I'd probably get dinner with them (20$ limit though) as a first date and build some more rapport. Second time if there still interested then they will come back to my crib.

What are some good free spots in Atlanta to hit up? I need to change the game up a little especially since I'm currently talking to some chicks in Atlanta.
 

McMotherLover

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What a cheap **** you are.... Grabbing a couple drinks on a night/time there are drink specials (happy hr, wed or thursday nights, whatever) is the perfect play most of the time. You'll spend 15-20, she'll get buzzed, and you'll make out or if she's dtf she'll be dtf even more after.
 

J Roc

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McMotherLover said:
What a cheap **** you are.... Grabbing a couple drinks on a night/time there are drink specials (happy hr, wed or thursday nights, whatever) is the perfect play most of the time. You'll spend 15-20, she'll get buzzed, and you'll make out or if she's dtf she'll be dtf even more after.
If a female you've just met is DTF then why waste your money on buying her drinks? Why not just skip drinks and invite her to your place and get straight to business LOL. Unlike you, I dont have to get women buzzed in order to have sex with them.
 

Masculinity

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I don't buy them stuff; I split the check into 40% and 60% and pay the bigger half. If it is something below five dollars I wouldn't mind if her personality is cool.
 

McMotherLover

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J Roc said:
If a female you've just met is DTF then why waste your money on buying her drinks? Why not just skip drinks and invite her to your place and get straight to business LOL. Unlike you, I dont have to get women buzzed in order to have sex with them.
Because girls you've just met don't usually want to just go over to your place the first time they chill, duh. After meeting up for a few, they get a little buzzed, good convo, then it's more likely. Or maybe you just meet desperate chics who will go wherever with you without even knowing you?
 

WORKEROUTER

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Unless you're insanely poor (in which case maybe dating isn't the best idea at the moment), the idea of not paying should not stem from some weird obsession with pinching pennies and being a cheap ass. I hear guys brag about how they will absolutely never will pay for a date. That seems silly. My rule is to just keep the date under 30 bucks.

First off, if you build some strong chemistry and IL before the date, there's no reason it will likely be a flop. Even if you don't end up banging her, having a chick to bring out with her girlfriends will help your social proofing. Being a cheap ass will not.

Second, a lot of times the chicks end up paying for stuff the next time anyway. If you're a cool enough dude, you can get them to pay for stuff. I'm not saying this should be the goal but the point is that the ROI is higher.

Some chicks--even the NON gold digger *****es--just feel good when a guy pays, even if he just buys a drink and a cheap appetizer. It's not about the amount of money. Taking an absolute attitude to not paying is most likely closing off your options to tagging more chicks. Plus your ROI might even be less.

There are some dates that I just won't pay for because I KNOW that I can't stand the chick and don't want to talk to her again. But if she's cool and we're having a good time, I wouldn't be a penny pincher over 20 bucks. All it really shows is that you're a cheap ass.
 

J Roc

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WORKEROUTER said:
Some chicks--even the NON gold digger *****es--just feel good when a guy pays, even if he just buys a drink and a cheap appetizer. It's not about the amount of money. Taking an absolute attitude to not paying is most likely closing off your options to tagging more chicks. Plus your ROI might even be less.
It has nothing to do with being a cheap ass. I have money and have no problem treating a woman once I know she is into me. If a woman likes you she doesn't care if you spend money on her when you first meet her. My best dates have been dates where I dont spend any money such as meeting up in a park for a jog or walking along the beach. Spending money on her isnt required to have a fun successful date.
 

SgtSplacker

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I don't mind paying for a dinner, I enjoy taking a pretty girl out probably more than she would benefit from just a free meal. Now the drinks are another thing altogether.
In Florida you can have a nice dinner for two for just under $35 (no sweat there). But if you start drinking you can easily pass $100 on just a couple drinks. $10 drinks are common down here. So if I see she's a drinker we'll just hit a bar and leave it at that. Or if she's more of a dinner girl we'll have dinner then i'll get her to the crib and have drinks there, since I keep my bar reasonably stocked.

The main thing is not to drink in the same places you eat because the drinks are more expensive if they serve good food.

Drink in drinking places.

Eat in eating places.

In lots of restaurants the waiters try to rush you out to get more tips by the end of the night. I used to hate that but... THIS IS A GOOD THING. Go with it and get that girl outta there to a place with cheaper drinks!
 

WORKEROUTER

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J Roc said:
It has nothing to do with being a cheap ass. I have money and have no problem treating a woman once I know she is into me. If a woman likes you she doesn't care if you spend money on her when you first meet her. My best dates have been dates where I dont spend any money such as meeting up in a park for a jog or walking along the beach. Spending money on her isnt required to have a fun successful date.

Certainly not a requirement. But you might be cutting down your numbers by having this absolutist attitude. What's the big deal of spending 20 bucks and having a good time? I go into the date knowing that I'm going to nail her and likely have residual p*ssy after that.

I use to have your attitude for several years. As my game evolved I began to get answers for thsi question from chicks I was fukking, and the general consensus is that it can just make you look like a cheap ass or like a guy who's gotten "burned" too much in the past and now you're pissy about it.

But if you have a good time going on free dates at first, then by all means it's the way to go..Everyone has a different type of game. Just wanted to give you some other things to consider.
 

SgtSplacker

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WORKEROUTER said:
Certainly not a requirement. But you might be cutting down your numbers by having this absolutist attitude. What's the big deal of spending 20 bucks and having a good time? I go into the date knowing that I'm going to nail her and likely have residual p*ssy after that.

I use to have your attitude for several years. As my game evolved I began to get answers for thsi question from chicks I was fukking, and the general consensus is that it can just make you look like a cheap ass or like a guy who's gotten "burned" too much in the past and now you're pissy about it.

But if you have a good time going on free dates at first, then by all means it's the way to go..Everyone has a different type of game. Just wanted to give you some other things to consider.

I has a little to do with age too, the type of women I date like to see you have your life in order. Not only that but these girls come dressed to the nines, all dolled up. If I take them to the park and start walking around they are going to look at me like i'm crazy. And I definitely wont get any, that's for sure. These girls really spend money on themselves, and expect you to do so also. Now if you're in college then of course she can't expect you to spend any real bread taking her out. I can't get away with that unless i'm taking out one of these little girls that wear flip flops everywhere.

Point is that it's all about strategy, you have to feel your date out (in more than one way lol!) if she talks about going to bars, take her to a bar. If she's all about sushi then that's what she's eating tonight. If you take a bar girl out to an expensive restaurant, she's gonna think you are trying to buy her lay so that wont work either. If she talks Mortons Steak House then i'm gonna feel her out real good and make sure at least I have a decent chance to lay her, otherwise i'll totally turn the tables and flake on her azz.
 

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WORKEROUTER said:
Some chicks--even the NON gold digger *****es--just feel good when a guy pays, even if he just buys a drink and a cheap appetizer. It's not about the amount of money. Taking an absolute attitude to not paying is most likely closing off your options to tagging more chicks. Plus your ROI might even be less.
Sometimes it's better to just go with certain social conventions. You will get an insane amount of resistance from a girl until you know her name (and can lose everything you built if you forget it). Why should a name matter? But it does.

Same with paying for a date. The lousy $10-20 is just a token gesture. I'd much rather pay $20 and increase my possible success than have to winnow out every girl who won't like me because I didn't buy her a $3 beer.
 

Packers2010

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for me, my first dates are at things i like.

Pool hall and coffee, record shopping and coffee or a drink in a bar.

all cheep, all things i like. so when she leaves me early or flakes. I'm right where i want to be
 

MasterFuu

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I always pay for first date but in order for me to call them for second date they have to offer to split first date. If they dont offer to split (of course I pay but offering means she's not seeing you just as a free meal but someone she likes to get to know). No offer to split first date no second date.
 
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WORKEROUTER said:
Unless you're insanely poor (in which case maybe dating isn't the best idea at the moment), the idea of not paying should not stem from some weird obsession with pinching pennies and being a cheap ass. I hear guys brag about how they will absolutely never will pay for a date. That seems silly. My rule is to just keep the date under 30 bucks.

THIS^^^^.

Bro I'm assuming you're from Western Aus I live in Melbourne and I too am flabbergasted that this thread even exists!! Maybe we do things differently down under. I wouldn't hesitate, if you ask a girl out, you are asking them out so of course you pay! It's like asking someone to come over to your house but bring their own food! LMAO just plain wrong who gives a feck about $50. If you do, I dare say you got bigger issues in life than picking up women. My cousin is as tight as they come and guess what, he finally got his first missus (yes first) at the age of 34! Go figure! We went overseas and he was constantly tipping in less for the bill and trying to figure out ways he could skimp out on ****. I mean FFS who thinks like that? I guess he probably DID finally figure out what the issue was. If you show your date that 30-$50 means more to you than her she's gonna be turned off bigtime. NOBODY likes a tightass unless they're a tightass themselves. I fkn hate tightasses.
 

Zerro

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It depends. If it's an informal "testing the water to see if there is interest" meetup during our lunchbreak then I'll only pay for my own meal. If it's a actual serious "I know she's interested so this is definitely a date" thing then I'm definitely paying.
 

moneyisking

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You know, I was kind of wondering about this issue of "am I a AFC for paying for dates" thing. Now it makes sense that girls will like it better if guys cough up the bills, of course while keeping first few dates cheap (like $30 and less).

Chris Rock did say "there is something between a woman reaching for her wallet to pay for the bill, and her pvssy just drying up. It's like the wallet is sending the pvssy a signal that this man is not worth to get wet for" lol. Sad but true. So I guess I am gona have to work my s off this summer.
 

J Roc

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Some guys HAVE to spend money and others DONT. Whatever works for you :D
 
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