How many minutes?

[R19]

Can't get this one off of my mind. So I have a plate who has been playing me. She has a boyfriend right now, won't disclose this to me at all, and I am not getting what I want out of the situation. She hosted an intimate party a few weeks ago Saturday and I wasn't invited as she is keeping me on the side. I found out about it last minute, but clearly wasn't going to show up uninvited.

The kicker is she had the nerve to e-mail me bright and early the next morning to tell me about it. She also included a little rant about how she was out the door to get something as she hadn't had any breakfast yet.

I wanted to e-mail her the following right back and would like to know what you all think - too harsh?:
'How many minutes has it been since you were cumming all over each other?'

 

[Ztr1der]

I wouldnt reply tbh

 

[bluemanson]

im not one to say anything but i dont think you should reply especially that

 

[R19]

Thanks, any other suggestions? Not looking for a particular result. Just to see if anyone ever does this type of thing. Or do people defer to silence and fading away.

 

[WC2]

Can't get this one off of my mind. So I have a plate who has been playing me. She has a boyfriend right now, won't disclose this to me at all, and I am not getting what I want out of the situation. She hosted an intimate party a few weeks ago Saturday and I wasn't invited as she is keeping me on the side. I found out about it last minute, but clearly wasn't going to show up uninvited.

The kicker is she had the nerve to e-mail me bright and early the next morning to tell me about it. She also included a little rant about how she was out the door to get something as she hadn't had any breakfast yet.

I wanted to e-mail her the following right back and would like to know what you all think - too harsh?:
'How many minutes has it been since you were cumming all over each other?'

A plate playing you?

Are you hypocritical?

If you're indeed calling her one of your 'plates' then you are playing her as well.

Men need to realize that women love sex from different men just as much as we like sex from different women.

I have never and I mean NEVER sent an email to some chick who I wasn't in a relationship with. Nor should you ever get your panties in a bunch when a girl starts to flake on you. So what. Move on. Like you said she's a plate and we spin plates.

Go spin some others.

 

[R19]

Now editing because I have a real screen and keyboard vs. a fvcking crackberry. Thanks WC2. I was trying to set her up as an LTR so probably off on calling her a plate. Most girls... I wouldn't have done what I have done as far as energy into the deal. Long/short, put in wayyyyy tooo much compared to what I have gotten out of it.

I do fall into the trap of e-mailing and texting because there are chicks that prefer that over the phone.

** Leave my situation aside for a moment. **

Does anyone get to the point where they have had too much and e-mailed something like I posted?
- If that is what you are thinking.
- You are not trying to get any result or whatever.
- You couldn't really care less.
- and on and on.

I think if more guys said what they thought then women would get smacked down more on their sh1t tests and BS that they play. This whole don't respond or fade this or that. Is that always the answer?

 

[Igetit!]

Long/short, put in wayyyyy tooo much compared to what I have gotten out of it.

Well,why did you do this? Why did you continue to contribute and put in when you were getting virtually nothing in return?

I do fall into the trap of e-mailing and texting because there are chicks that prefer that over the phone.

Ok...I see. You fall into the of e-mailing and texting because that's what some girls prefer. I have a question. What about you? What do YOU prefer? Have you ever thought about that,or are you too busy catering to the girl and what she wants? I'm starting to sense a bit of pedistal treatment on your part with women.

Does anyone get to the point where they have had too much and e-mailed something like I posted?

Yeah,I was wondering about this. Were you serious about this? And if so,what is it you were hoping to accomplish by sending her this type of e-mail? Once she read it,what were hoping would happen? I understand you being angry or upset over putting a lot into her and getting nothing back,but I doubt that sending her some e-mail about her and some guy "cumming all over each other" will inspire her to start putting more into the two of you possibly dating each other.

I think if more guys said what they thought then women would get smacked down more on their sh1t tests and BS that they play.

Yeah,I hear ya on this one. So if you believe this,then why didn't do this before you put all the time,effort,and energy into her?

This whole don't respond or fade this or that. Is that always the answer?

No,not always. Sometimes it is,and sometimes it isn't. And you can't be taught when you blast,you'll just know through gaining wisdom. To me,it seems that you wanting to blast her with that e-mail wasn't because of her not inviting to her party,or because of the e-mail she sent you. Those things were just the last straws. The reason you wanted to sent that e-mail was because each time you put something into this girl and you got nothing back,it made you angry. And this happened over and over and over again,with you getting angrier and angrier,until when when you got her e-mail,you just lost it.

It's your fault. You shouldn't have continue puring out of yourself into her and getting nothing back for so long. Once you realized what was going on,you should have pulled back. And like WC2 said,what in the world were you doing putting so much energy into a "plate" to start with?

It all boils down to this: Don't send her that e-mail. The only thing you'll accomplish is making things worse.

 

[R19]

Hoping to accomplish nothing. FWIW, didn't and won't send it (this was a few weeks ago - been redlining me though), but why not? That's the point. When you don't give a fvck, why not smack them down. This would reinforce that what women do in certain situations is wrong and make them think twice the next time (luckier for next guy(s)). Instead there are more than enough AFC's to positively reinforce their behavior and a DJ response at this point may be lost in the shuffle... Stuff needs to be managed the right way for minute one.

Yes I didn't frame right and do all the right things, but I get no mulligans or do-overs. On a ten scale this was a definite 8++ in difficulty. But this is not some afforded trust fund chick that has had everything handed or even someone with a decent background. She is self-made to the core and has faced a lot in her life and that is part of why I put in so much energy. Unfortunately, I won't go into details because this is a small world. Thanks.

Prefer e-communication during day where I am busy and am not going to have convo on the phone.

 

[Igetit!]

When you don't give a fvck, why not smack them down.

More than likely,if it gets to the point where you don't give a fvck,then you're ALREADY off course. If you want to smack her down at this point,then that means that in one way or another,she's been smacking you down from the moment you two met all the way up until you finally no longer "gave a f*ck". So this response isn't out of manliness or being a DJ,it's out of being walked on and being a wimp to the girl. Women aren't stupid. They know the difference between a guy behaving like a man,and a guy having a temper tantrum. I'm glad you decided against sending her that e-mail,because that wasn't a man speaking,it was childish.

This would reinforce that what women do in certain situations is wrong and make them think twice the next time (luckier for next guy(s)).

You believe this? Like I said before,women aren't stupid. They ALREADY know the difference between right and wrong,they don't need you to teach them. What,you think that the way this girl treated you was the first time she ever treated a guy like that? Or the last time? She knows what she's doing. Women will try to get away with as much as us guys will allow. If you had put your foot down from the beginning of her foolishness,you wouldn't have need to go there with that kind of e-mail. The only thing that will really get a woman's attention,and cause her behavior to change is a man having a willingness to walk away...and to MEAN IT. EVERYTHING ELSE will fail. You can yell at her,curse her out,in some cases you can even beat her,but as long as you're still there with her when it's all over,she'll revert right back to her original behavior.

If you had sent her that e-mail,I GUARANTEE her behavior wouldn't have changed. You wouldn't have "set her straight" for the next guy.
The only thing you would have done is make her glad that she didn't get any deeper involved with you than she did.

 

[R19]

Thanks Igetit!.

This would reinforce that what women do in certain situations is wrong and make them think twice the next time (luckier for next guy(s)).

Check this, what I meant to say is that 'this would reinforce that what women do in certain situations is not lost on the guy (in fact, like in this situation, it becomes so blatantly obvious that this is their standard MO with many guys). Women will lie with no hesitation to work their game to the point where they believe that there is no remorse or sense of doing something wrong.

Also, would like to hear more on 'willingness to leave'. There are a lot of chicks I meet where I have an I don't give a fvck attitude all throughout. I have split out with no problems in other situations, but maybe I don't convey this 'willingness' enough or in the best ways. How is it done most effectively?

This one got to me sooo hard because she is right on, my most desired style type in every aspect in looks and personality.

 

[sodbuster]

DO NOT run around dirtying up the stream you are trying to fish in. Walk away-she'll know why. She won't get in your way in the future. BUT send a pissy e-mail and set her think you are a crazy man? She'll warn every woman she knows.

 

[R19]

DO NOT run around dirtying up the stream you are trying to fish in.

Hard to do when her boyfriend is around and I am not supposed to know about him = I am not in her tightest circles now. Which is not preferred because she has a few friends that are also of interest.

Keep it coming. This is getting more and more hypothetical by the minute (which I think is good for learning). Getting interested to know why no one thinks it's a good idea or has seemed to have done this. Thanks.

And yes I am fading. I only have so much energy, I am not superman, and there are a lot of great prospects in my hood. I went to a street festival for a few minutes recently and it was R I D I C U L O U S.

 

[DonJuan11]

The kicker is she had the nerve to e-mail me bright and early the next morning to tell me about it. She also included a little rant about how she was out the door to get something as she hadn't had any breakfast yet.

I wanted to e-mail her the following right back and would like to know what you all think - too harsh?:
'How many minutes has it been since you were cumming all over each other?'

Holy cow, bitter much?

Translation: I don't have enough game to sleep with you and turn you on, so I'm going to send an crude and rude email to show my frustration that he gets to have sex with you and I don't. Hopefully by this email you'll either get the point and fall in love with me, or curse me out like I'm a bad boy so I can get my ego stroked and feel better about myself.


Her: I'm out the door to get something to eat, I haven't had any breakfast yet.
R19: It's unfortunate I missed your party, I would have loved to come to see you. Perhaps next time, take care.

Her: I'm out the door to get something to eat, I haven't had any breakfast yet.
R19: How many minutes has it been since you were cumming all over each other?'

Which response says I haven't been laid in 2 months?

 

[R19]

Or how about this one:

Her: I hosted a party yesterday and it was ok. Not many people showed up (but you weren't invited, but it's ok because my bf railed the fvck out of me last night and we went at it even harder this morning so much in fact that) I skipped breakfast, but thought I'd jump on-line and say hi (- oh thanks honey! my favorite french toast and fruit!!!).

Hoping to accomplish nothing, but 'or curse me out like I'm a bad boy so I can get my ego stroked and feel better about myself' is not a bad outcome.

'I don't have enough game to sleep with you and turn you on' Not true.

Now, can we go find the thread about the girl that showed up at a guy's home for dinner, etc. and had some other guy's cvm in her hair from minutes earlier???? Because that is what I was thinking about and all variations when I read the e-mail.

Does anyone ever tell a woman what they really think? And if it sounds like I am crazy or bitter or on rock that is what this forum is for - to vent, hash it out, improve, and learn so thanks.

 

[Igetit!]

Also, would like to hear more on 'willingness to leave'. There are a lot of chicks I meet where I have an I don't give a fvck attitude all throughout. I have split out with no problems in other situations,

Ok,you see that part of your thread I put in bold? That shouldn't be. There shouldn't be any "other situations". A LOT of guys do this. They act and behave one way with one type of girl,and another way with another. They'll treat a 7 one way,then treat a 9 another. And I'm not talking about the way you approach her,I'm talking about once a relationship has been established. Usually when a woman is extremely attractive and she's the hottest you've ever dated,you'll put her on a pedistal. You act different because you dont wan't to "mess the up". Of course the girl sees you acting that way,and she'll lose attraction for you,but she won't leave you.....not yet. First,she push and push and push,and get away with as much disrespect as she can(or as much as you allow her to do). She'll do this up until she gets bored with you,until another guy comes along,or until you finally grow a backbone and put her in her place.

but maybe I don't convey this 'willingness' enough or in the best ways. How is it done most effectively?

Well the BEST WAY is to establish it FROM THE BEGINNING. What I'm about to say is hard,very hard for most guys to do,but in order for you and her to be happy in a relationship,YOU HAVE TO PUT YOUR PRIDE AND SELF-RESPECT ABOVE YOUR DESIRE FOR SEX. In other words,a woman treating you right,treating you with dignity and respect has to be more important to you than having sex with her. If you make sex number 1,and her treating you right second place,what will happen is you might get sex,but you won't get a relationship. The reason is because for sex,a girl just has to be attracted to you,but for a relationship,she needs trust. And if you're willing to sell your pride,self-respect,and dignity all for a roll in the hay,what woman would trust being in a relationship with you if all another woman has to do is just walk by you to have you drop everything and go after her?

I'll give you a example of what said to a woman one time when we first started dating. What happened was we got into a discussion about sex,and I tell her what I wanted and what I expected from her. This was at the very beginning of the relationship....

me:The things I'm looking for in with a woman are this,this, and this. If you cool with all this and you don't have a problem with it,then fine. But if you don't feel comfortable with it,or you have a problem with anything I said,then I'd appreciate it if you'd just tell me right now. This way we don't have to worry wasting each other's time. I can go my way and find a woman who'll give me what I want,and you can go your way and find a guy who'll give you want you want.

Yep,I actually said that to a woman....and I meant it. She said she was ok with everything I said,but if she had said no,and she didn't want to do what I wanted,I would have said "Adios",and moved on. This is what I mean by putting yourself (pride,self-respect,dignity) above sex. If you do this,a woman will not only respect you,but she'll have a strong,strong sexual attraction for you. Women like guys who stand out. Well,how often do you think women run into guys like this?

Man,this is a deep,DEEP topic to get into. I could really break this thing down farther,but I'm tired man.

Anyway,good luck.

This one got to me sooo hard because she is right on, my most desired style type in every aspect in looks and personality.[/QUOTE]

 

[DonJuan11]

Or how about this one:

Her: I hosted a party yesterday and it was ok. Not many people showed up (but you weren't invited, but it's ok because my bf railed the fvck out of me last night and we went at it even harder this morning so much in fact that) I skipped breakfast, but thought I'd jump on-line and say hi (- oh thanks honey! my favorite french toast and fruit!!!).

Is this is the case as you say, no response is warranted. She is trying to get a reaction out of you and if you react, she knows she has you emotionally. Ignore her online and go to the gym or the library. Don't focus on how to retaliate, it won't accomplish anything constructive. You're not a prime time lawyer in the trial of the century, you are chatting online with a girl who is so floozy she doesn't know where the Pacific Ocean is.


Does anyone ever tell a woman what they really think?

Why would you or anyone do that? Why lower yourself like that? Why waste time in a war or words that's going to accomplish nothing? Suppose you tell her off, she'll feel bad for 2 days and you'll feel happy, then what? You haven't accomplished anything. This is different than calling a girl on her bad or immature behavior if you are in a relationship or dating her, but a girl that tells you she just slept with a bf and hasn't' had time to come up for water is the most immature girl you can meet. Don't waste your time with her.



And if it sounds like I am crazy or bitter or on rock that is what this forum is for - to vent, hash it out, improve, and learn so thanks.

Yes this forum is about to learn and improve, and occasionally vent, but its not about who can come up with the snappiest and quickest to a girl who just had sex and is trying to throw it in your face. That's a total waste of time. This girl is trying to get her ego stroked even more by telling you such things and having you react angrily and the best response is NO RESPONSE.

-----------------------------

Camille: I slept with him to infiltrate his organization, does that bother you?
Bond: No, not in the slightest.

 

[R19]

Thanks DJ11 and everyone. I am taking the right road, but should have been on it wayy back and then would most likely have faired better.