How do non DJs get girls?

[HardTimes]

Just thought about something.

Obviously DJs are in the very minority. This is pure speculation but I'd venture to say only about 10% of guys out there have any kind of varying degrees of DJ in them (learned or natural). Most guys out there are just regular guys with regular lives.

So how are the remaining 90% of guys getting girlfriends/getting married? For me it's a damn near impossible task so what the hell are the other non-DJs doing that I aren't?

Or maybe I just don't know it but most guys out there don't get women just like me and the 10% of the gifted get all the women?

 

[Ryoku]

Just thought about something.

Obviously DJs are in the very minority. This is pure speculation but I'd venture to say only about 10% of guys out there have any kind of varying degrees of DJ in them (learned or natural). Most guys out there are just regular guys with regular lives.

So how are the remaining 90% of guys getting girlfriends/getting married? For me it's a damn near impossible task so what the hell are the other non-DJs doing that I aren't?

Or maybe I just don't know it but most guys out there don't get women just like me and the 10% of the gifted get all the women?

They settle for whatever chick they can get.

Have you considered, oh I don't know - becoming an attractive man?

Or are you a troll?

 

[WC2]

You're talking about three totally different things :

Getting Girls
Getting Girlfriends
Getting Married

All different situations.

I'm not going to split the differences between all of them, but you should know that there are indeed more women on this planet than men, so naturally even men who 'can't get women' are getting married constantly.

Hence a small reason (but still one) why women tend to cheat on men who aren't as good as them. Women get shacked up with men who don't know jack about women, only for personal and financial security. It's sad, but it happens every day.

There's really no trick to why these guys are getting married to women; it's essential to a lot of women to have a partner, whether they are attracted to him or not.

 

[HardTimes]

Have you considered, oh I don't know - becoming an attractive man?

Or are you a troll?

No I'm a decent looking guy I just don't get girls.

And what do you mean they settle? How do they get the girl to settle with in the first place?

 

[HardTimes]

You're talking about three totally different things :

Getting Girls
Getting Girlfriends
Getting Married

All different situations.

I'm not going to split the differences between all of them, but you should know that there are indeed more women on this planet than men, so naturally even men who 'can't get women' are getting married constantly.

Hence a small reason (but still one) why women tend to cheat on men who aren't as good as them. Women get shacked up with men who don't know jack about women, only for personal and financial security. It's sad, but it happens every day.

There's really no trick to why these guys are getting married to women; it's essential to a lot of women to have a partner, whether they are attracted to him or not.

I'm talking about any of those situations. And that's my original point of this thread, *how* are these men who can't get women eventually getting married if they can't get women? That doesn't make any sense to me. If the women aren't attracted to them and just want financial security or whatever how does the situation present itself in the first place?

 

[Maxtro]

Consider this. There are 3 types of man

DJ: Gets girls very easily
Normal: May or may not easily gets girls but has had a few girlfriends or is married.
Below Average: Because of some fault; physical, mental, social or a combination, getting girls is near impossible.

I would say that many men on this site, myself included fall under the below average category.

Men who simply cannot get a girl for whatever reason are actually a small percentage of the population. We also have to work extremely hard just to become "normal."

I have no idea why things turn out like they do for the unlucky few but it does.

 

[HardTimes]

Consider this. There are 3 types of man

DJ: Gets girls very easily
Normal: May or may not easily gets girls but has had a few girlfriends or is married.
Below Average: Because of some fault; physical, mental, social or a combination, getting girls is near impossible.

I would say that many men on this site, myself included fall under the below average category.

Men who simply cannot get a girl for whatever reason are actually a small percentage of the population. We also have to work extremely hard just to become "normal."

I have no idea why things turn out like they do for the unlucky few but it does.

I can agree with that, I'm talking about the normal guy. Normal guys are not DJs so they don't get a lot of women but they do get women. I guess the point of this thread is what is the difference between the normal guy and the below average guy that allows the normal guy to get girls?

 

[Maxtro]

As I said before, the below average guy has some fault or a combination of faults that basically prevent him from getting girls. I'd say that 90% of the below average guys suffer from low self-confidence and self-esteem.

I believe that low self-confidence develops from a lack of success in an activity deemed to be very important to the person. In my case I have foolishly based my very important activity to be getting girls. A smarter thing to do, would have been to find a different activity that I enjoyed and became good at that.

Another issue that effects self-esteem is the persons coping strategy with stress as a child. My parents divorced when I was 3 and I was raised by my mom. For reasons I don't know, I became and remained a very angry and hurt child. I have vague memories of screaming at the top of my lungs into my desk in the middle of class in 1st or 2nd grade. I was an emotional wreck well into my teens. Unfortunately I never received the help I needed as a child and the feelings of anger, depression and being hurt have carried over to this day. The fact that my younger brother attempted suicide shows that something went very wrong with the both of us.

With the fact that all my early crushes ended poorly I had no success and the self-confidence was actually torn down instead of being built up like it should have.

It's funny that in my pursuit of an 18 year old girl, me a 27 year old guy (She thinks I'm 23) with a decent job, going to a good school, a nice car and a decent place of my own; was out played by a 19 year old kid, with no job, no car who lives with his parents. The only reason I lost was because of my confidence.

I'm sure each of us below average guys have our own sob stories. But focusing on the past will not help us. We need to fight for the future.

 

[Kal0051]

It's funny that in my pursuit of an 18 year old girl, me a 27 year old guy (She thinks I'm 23) with a decent job, going to a good school, a nice car and a decent place of my own; was out played by a 19 year old kid, with no job, no car who lives with his parents. The only reason I lost was because of my confidence.

ouch dude, that sucks. Well at least you understand what your problem is. I wish I knew what was keeping me from being successful with women.

 

[Jitterbug]

The average non-DJ guy sees a girl he likes, summons the courage to get her number and asks her out and sometimes as lady luck has it, she falls into his lap.

It's funny that in my pursuit of an 18 year old girl, me a 27 year old guy (She thinks I'm 23) with a decent job, going to a good school, a nice car and a decent place of my own; was out played by a 19 year old kid, with no job, no car who lives with his parents. The only reason I lost was because of my confidence.

Don't feel bad, mate. I lost a girl to a younger guy with no steady job (vs me with a decent career), still lives with his parent and has next to no confidence nor game compared to mine. She was more attracted to me but was intimidated as she thought I was a player. She got bored with the other guy very quickly and dumped him after a couple of months, then wanted me to give her a chance but I already moved on & dated others. My ego got a pretty hard kick at the time but I got over it very quickly (thanks to my DJ training) whereas that other guy has been down in the dumps since then (that was 1.5 years ago).

Being a DJ isn't all about getting more women than the average guy nor always getting the woman you want. I "lost" that chick to the AFC guy but I still "won" in the end.

 

[ohsnap]

Some guys are just natural with girls, have the right upbringing to instil in them whatever traits women find attractive. A lot of people don't concern themselves with girls that much, and just pull them as an after-product of having a great, natural, healthy lifestyle. Others have amazing talents or skills, that a woman with the same interests will find very attractive (I know this, because I pulled a HB10 from an ONLINE VIDEO GAME while acting like an AFC, just because I happened to be among the world's top players in it). She dumped me when she stopped playing. Go figure.

Half of being a DJ is just saying "go out there and have a healthy lifestyle, do what you're good at, be yourself, blah blah".

 

[WhtRbt]

Success with women doesn't mean having one.

 

[Darth]

Interesting question.

I think it comes down to social skills. The average guy has enough social skills to where talking to girls is just as easy as guys. Maybe they start out as friends and then become more...

And then there are naturals, who just naturally "get it" without having to look it up on the Internet on sites like this.

And then there's us.

In my case, I have lots of self-confidence/self-esteem, but bad social skills. It's like I was given incredible abilities in other areas, but shortchanged on the social end.

And then on top of that, I was extremely self-conscious and afraid of girls in high school, and also I used to have a speech impediment which I think had a lot to do with it.

 

[edger]

Just thought about something.

Obviously DJs are in the very minority. This is pure speculation but I'd venture to say only about 10% of guys out there have any kind of varying degrees of DJ in them (learned or natural). Most guys out there are just regular guys with regular lives.

So how are the remaining 90% of guys getting girlfriends/getting married? For me it's a damn near impossible task so what the hell are the other non-DJs doing that I aren't?

Or maybe I just don't know it but most guys out there don't get women just like me and the 10% of the gifted get all the women?

Yes, I always speak about this. And what's funny is that, I actually HAVE my sh*t together, and pull less than these non-DJ's. It appears there are more "non-DJ's" pulling hotties than what this site makes you think. Guys here over-exaggerate a lot.

Another thing I often think too, is that, there are more players out there than what this site has you think as well.

It's very frustrating, I totally identify with you.

 

[Dimehair]

Still in high school, I'm noticing a trend. All the guys that get girls either lots or key guy friends, good friends, that they've known since elementary school, or at least junior high. These are usually neighbors, too. Once they get to HS, they've already got loads of buds so making new friends (and meeting girls) is easy, because it's not coming from a place of need. Social guys are perceived as sexier. Plus, lots of old friends equals lots parties where one can get to be better with girls. Even if booze might "screw up your game," it's a lot easier to sex a girl if you're buzzed and she can use "I don't remember; I was so wasted!" as an anti-slut defense. Today, I was talking to a guy classmate and he asked me, "So you didn't know anyone when you came to this school? I would have been scared sh!tless!" I guess I'm used to it. Second year at my school, and although I have no problem talking to people, making jokes, etc, I haven't made one true out of school friend. I've hung out with some guys outside of school or school activities, but it would just be a short string. I don't think there's something too wrong with me: I still hang out with my friends from middle school. Maybe pot is the answer? That's how I hear everybody meets each other. JK. Maybe it is just a mental block. Mom issues? Still, there are definately guys who just grow up to be better with girls. The good news is that this is a learnable skill.

 

[Sir_Turtle]

agreed any average guy with decent looks and, more importantly social skills and a social circle can "pull" chicks.

You also gotta remember that there ARE girls who are very practical in the way they choose guys to be with. There are social circles were its normal to find one person and stay with them for the rest of your life. These girls tend to exist in religious circles and have ENTIRELY different sets of beliefs about how things work.

The normal guy in this social circle has enoguh charm to turn a girl on and a relationship can start from there.

 

[edger]

No I'm a decent looking guy I just don't get girls.

I hear ya all too well. Decent looking guy myself, yet 97% of the time get no vibes from attractive women.

 

[Faded Image]

No I'm a decent looking guy I just don't get girls.

Okay HardTimes! I have a question for you.

If you were a girl, would you date a guy like yourself or not?

If you believe you would, explain why (no homo).

If you can't come up with a reason, then you already have your answer of why you can't get girls.

 

[trd323]

Guy sees girl, gets nervous and cant think straight, but some how some way when the planets align he gets up starts walking towards her with sweaty ass palms, and says hello
Girl: Hi
Guy: hi, blah blah blah
Girl: he seems nice, and sincere, with no BS. lets talk to him more and find out
Guy: I like your dress its pretty, blah blah blah
Girl: That seemed like a sincere compliment and not some sleazy or weak pick up line, maybe he is honest
Guy: Bla blah blah
Girl: Ok he is sincere, honest, and no BS. If he asks I will say yes
Guy: Uhhhhhmmmmm, can i have your number
Girl: Sure

They live happily ever after. Its that simple. NO BS and all sincere, but definately not weak. Its been going on ever since this "community" existed and still that have never heard of the "community" still get married everyday. Maybe at 50%, but its toss of a coin chance at a happy ending. Go out there and be yourselves, you guys already know how to be the cool as guy.

 

[Ryoku]

Maybe at 50%, but its toss of a coin chance at a happy ending. Go out there and be yourselves, you guys already know how to be the cool as guy.

So a 1 in 2 chance to lose half your sh1t and pay some chick for sleeping with her?

And just because some one is married, doesn't mean they're happy.