How do I tell someone I'm dating that I'm not comfortable going to her neighborhood?

[MPM DJP]

We've only been going out for a little while. She doesn't have a car and she lives in a part of town were there are a lot of drugs, gang violence, shootings, muggings, car jackings...etc. I've been able to work around it, but sooner or later, I'm going to have to pick her up or drop her off. Every thing I hear about her neighborhood (statistics, police reports, travel advice, friends/locals) says I should stay away or risk getting hurt....Im afraid if I say something It would offend her, or she would disagree and then I'd have to, or look foolish.....

Do you guys have any ideas? I'd kind of like to go out with this woman for a while....

Thanks

Mike

 

[Warrior74]

Im afraid

Pansy.


Seriously though,is she a product of her environment? If so, why are you dating her? Because she's hot? if she's not a product of her environment, why is she living there? I think you need to think on your reasons for wanting to date her.

I dated a project chic for a while (actually she lived in a neighborhood next to the projects) and while she put on the front of a good girl from a bad place, eventually she showed her true colors. Date in your same social/economic class, only have one nighters, flings with those below your station in life.

If you are that scared, just admit it (to yourself) and break it off. I'm not riding up in bad spots to chase some tail. It's plenty of tail on my side of town. Good luck.

 

[amoka]

Just remember this: you life is more important than any pvssy you'd ever get. Personally, I don't deal with "project" chic, no matter how good looking she maybe. My life is wayyyyy valuable. Call it a quit with her... tell her you're not comfortable with her neighborhood. Period.

 

[MPM DJP]

HAHA Thanks Warrior74. I am definitely not a warrior myself! I might not say "pansy" though...just cautious.

Anyway, thats a good pt about her being product of her environment. I considered that, and I rechecked my motives. I actually like her (not just chasing tail) She could still be putting on a front, but that could happen with anyone from any neighborhood.....

I'd like to get to know her better -- I just dont want to go to her apt.

 

[scrouds]

I can smell your soiled tighty whiteys all the way here in florida. Always be aware of your surroundings and don't look like you're scared to be there.

 

[Da Realist]

Have to deal with this all the time in my city. Statistically nothing will happen to you. But what you need to do if you're so scared is first put on your poker face. A guy who is sure of himself doesn't make for an easy target. Next, become aware of your surroundings in which you analyze where and how someone may attack you. If you're coming up on a corner, get a little distance. If you see a dark alley, don't go down the dark alley. Third, know where you're going because someone who seems lost is an easy mark since they'll be more involved in trying to get their bearings than notice someone has been watching them. Last, be willing to fight if it arises. Running is always preferable to fighting, but sometimes you don get the option and need to bust a brick over someone's head.

 

[Tazman]

Drive an old beat up car when you pick her up, then switch back to you're main ride when you're out of the neighborhood...

 

[acw]

Learn Self Defense

Carry a Gun (can you get a permit or license in your state?)

Act like you ain't the kinda guy you mess with

Workout

Do Steroids...(lol)

 

[RedPill]

Become distant and start banging a chick who lives in a better neighborhood.

 

[MPM DJP]

Thanks guys. If I were to go to her apt, I would probably stay in the car and just make it quick pick up/drop off, but when I've been near this part of town, I was surprised by how many people are out walking around during the day. A group of people could easily surround your car, and do whatever.

Being that I have no street smarts, and am a long ways from being any kind of fighter (even with steroids) I'll probably opt for talking to her about my concerns.

I just cant think of a good way to say anything. I know whatever I say would be offensive to some degree, but if I could minimize this it would be better.,...

any ideas of what to say?

 

[scrouds]

yo biitch diz livin in da hoodz shiit is whack! get yo asss somewheres decent, or daddyz isn't gonna ****adoodledoo all over yo biznoches, ya dig?

 

[MaddXMan]

Just go and act normal, nothing's gonna happen, damn.

 

[Son of anarchy]

Well it depend if you are so different from people living there or drive some kind of car that its not common there.
If you are milky skinned with long blond hair and you wear a cowboy hat and your car is a mercedes slk,i suggest you to avoid groove neighbourhood from gta san andreas.
Anyway im not in that environment so just listen to the guys here who know how to deal with it.

 

[muscleman]

roids & hoopty are the two best suggestions.

you could always break it off, but then you'd be a pansy!

 

[Don Israel]

If you ever decide yo go ahead to that part of the hood, act like your from there. Don't go about looking left and right every two steps you take, it'll make you look like you got a sign on your head that says "mug me, i'm new".

 

[scrouds]

Maybe we can run AFC field trips into the ghetto. Show the suburban crackers that there's more to fear then just women.

 

[Mofongo]

If you decide to keep going to the hood, read this:
I am a pasty white Hispanic, my nickname in the hood was White Boy, because of the way I looked and behaved. I would always carry at least a knife with me, sometimes two, one in each pocket and ready to strike. I would never smile and never look at someone for more than one second. If I was lost, I would not look like I was lost, the way to do this is by not constantly looking at the street signs and surroundings, look long enough to read the signs. Behave like you have been going there your whole life and you don't see anything new or interesting, act bored.
If someone says "Hi", acknowledge it by saying hi back and nodding your head, don't smile. If I wanted to avoid any one that day, I would frown and behave like I was furious and look angry, not at anyone. By doing the angry act, people will try to avoid you and if they where thinking of doing something to you they will re-think it because they think that you are so angry and you will fight back.

 

[Kupid Diggs]

I heard Philly,PA is like Vietnam right now... Guys in Philly are Reckless right now

If I were you I wouldn't be THAT worried. Maybe carry a weapon in your car if you can. And keep it moving. I used to live in inner-city Chicago. I used to live near Humbolt Park, a predominately Puerto Rican neighborhood.

The general consensus in my neighborhood was that you don't mess with white people passing through unless they were clucks(drug customers). Think about it, if the locals were to start violence with innocent white bystanders they would just get unwanted attention from the police. Police would start cracking heads

Most of the violence in American inner-cities, is unfortunately black on black violence or Latino on Latino violence. Very rarely do the locals attack innocent bystanders on purpose for fear of unwanted attention from the police department.

 

[Julian]

I dated a girl who lived in a not super nice part of the city. It wasnt a dangerous area just a little poorer. I brought it up like "damn girl you live in the fkin hood i need to keep an eye on my ride."

She just laughed and agreed like "lulz I know" and told me about how someone busted in her apt. when she wasnt home and stole some dvd's. I was like wtf...move.

 

[st_99]

I'm from the philly area, what are we talking here, kensington? South philly?

I bet its south philly..