Help, my gf is starting to bring up marriage

[CornbreadFed]

So its been 3 months already, tell us @CornbreadFed did you cave in for the ultimatum? Did you propose already?

No, but I’m still with her lol.

 

[Aspire]

I want to continue the relationship, but I think marriage is a financial scam for both men and women. I refuse to waste 10k plus on a dumb event and let the government enter my bedroom. Not only that, but I am not sure if we both want kids and I find it completely more pointless if so.

Well you need to ask her if she wants kids and if she is willing to continue without marriage. Ball is in your court and you need to be willing to part ways if there is truly a conflict of interest. Had to do that with someone who after 2 dates inquired if marriage was what I was seeking, and this person was only a plan b for me anyway. And yes I sympathize with you on the idea of spend 5 figures on a wedding and the government recognizing your relationship.

 

[Divorced w 3]

I want to continue the relationship, but I think marriage is a financial scam for both men and women. I refuse to waste 10k plus on a dumb event and let the government enter my bedroom. Not only that, but I am not sure if we both want kids and I find it completely more pointless if so.

Depends what your life goals are. If you are not looking for someone to partner with and build a life with then obviously don’t marry her. If you value her whole contribution to your life, personally, emotionally, logically, sexually, professionally, lock it down. Totally depends what you’re trying to do. If you have kids with her, marriage won’t matter on that front.

 

[BackInTheGame78]

I want to continue the relationship, but I think marriage is a financial scam for both men and women. I refuse to waste 10k plus on a dumb event and let the government enter my bedroom. Not only that, but I am not sure if we both want kids and I find it completely more pointless if so.

What's there to "help" with? You want different things than she does and there isn't anything wrong with that.

You are simply incompatible with her in terms of life goals, and basically going any further with her is pretty much pointless. The end of the movie is set in stone, it's just how long is the long slow decline going to take for you to get to it, is the question. That's the only unknown at this point.

I'm not sure why guys think something like this is fixable. It isn't. Everyone has life goals they want to achieve and pretty much a person who has the opposite life goals from them is not a good fit. All I can say is perhaps you should have screened better at the beginning and if you already did then you should have known this day was coming.

There is no helping you in this situation. You are going to need to find someone compatible with your mindset, she isn't it. Sorry to be the bearer of bad news but this is simply reality.

OP, there comes a point in time in every relationship where if you are not going to marry her and she knows you won't, you simply become a time waster she needs to get rid of. Looks like you are getting really close to this stage.