Help me decipher this ******** email

[Ronin I]

Background...

I met this girl about 8 months ago..we went out a couple of times over the first 3 months - things never really went anywhere (she was seeing some other dude and wasn't quite through with him yet). We kept in touch by chatting online occassionally over the last couple of months. The past month or so she's been emailing me and IMing me more and more suggesting we get together - even suggesting we take a trip together to NYC where I'm from (she's never been there).

Anyway last night she IMs me, asks what I'm doing - I tell her I'm just chilling (recovering from hangover) - the long and short of it is we get together, watch a movie at my house, have a pretty good time together, I walk to her car and I give her a (somewhat awkward) goodnight kiss.

Then she sends me this email:

"Ronin I,

basically, last night i wanted to let you know #1. i was home safely and #2. that i wanted to thank you for the goodnight kiss, and that i know you are a good problem solver, and maybe you can figure out my problem. I think you are so great, and I want to let "urges" bring us together to have fun, not make things uncomfortable at all (which i felt like I did), and basically there are have many nights of communicating with you where i feel so close that i could reach out and snatch you. I'm best when i'm talking to you, however, we haven't really been in the same room that much. I know I said lets me friends, and that's where i am, but I like the kind of friends we are, where we can goof around, be flirty and fun and I wouldn't take anything back. So, just don't second guess yourself at all. You are terrific, and if you want to kiss me goodnight, go for it. in 8 months I have grown closer to you than to anyone else, and sometimes I get the urge to make my flirtatious comments a reality, but i don't know why, i get more shy with you too. i can imagine that you must think i'm silly, immature, maybe even slighly "wacko" , but i think the truth is that emotionally i am your sweetpea, , and physically i don't want there to be any boundaries, but if there are, then there are. I appreciate you more than you know because every time I see that you are on the computer, I am energized and relieved. you bring a smile to my face without even saying a word. thank you. thank you. thank you for being who you are and for writing to me. i had a great time visiting you last night.
from the best girl you've ever known (haha, jk)"

Be interested to see what read you guys get on this email.

 

[Walden]

Jaysus. That's the worst ******** I've ever read. I have no idea what that person is saying. Maybe she's a tourist from planet "Woman" and wants directions to something. See if she has an English phrasebook she can read from.

 

[Ronin I]

Originally posted by Walden
Jaysus. That's the worst ******** I've ever read. I have no idea what that person is saying. Maybe she's a tourist from planet "Woman" and wants directions to something. See if she has an English phrasebook she can read from.

ROTFLMAO!!!!!!!!!!

 

[Helter Skelter]

Ronin,

I think she likes you

From other posts of yours, you seem like a pretty cool dude.

As far as her e-mail to you, I would take it as a positive.

But always remember how flakey chicks can be, so nothing is ever certain.

 

[legolas]

It seems like she's saying "I think you have to make the moves buddy" I mean, taking it directly it seems like you've been holding back and not going for it as she hopes you do. It seems like she's giving you a green light....

On the other side, you can always say that her problem is that she thinks too much and takes less action. DO NOT analyze her email to her!!! Solving problems is for therapists and friends.

It's basically a woman who's conflicted between her sexual drives and her social drives. Why was the kiss awkward? Who was it awkward for?

 

[MVPlaya]

Originally posted by Ronin I
"Ronin I,

basically, last night i wanted to let you know #1. i was home safely and #2. that i wanted to thank you for the goodnight kiss, and that i know you are a good problem solver, and maybe you can figure out my problem. I think you are so great, and I want to let "urges" bring us together to have fun, not make things uncomfortable at all (which i felt like I did), and basically there are have many nights of communicating with you where i feel so close that i could reach out and snatch you. I'm best when i'm talking to you, however, we haven't really been in the same room that much. I know I said lets me friends, and that's where i am, but I like the kind of friends we are, where we can goof around, be flirty and fun and I wouldn't take anything back. So, just don't second guess yourself at all. You are terrific, and if you want to kiss me goodnight, go for it. in 8 months I have grown closer to you than to anyone else, and sometimes I get the urge to make my flirtatious comments a reality, but i don't know why, i get more shy with you too. i can imagine that you must think i'm silly, immature, maybe even slighly "wacko" , but i think the truth is that emotionally i am your sweetpea, , and physically i don't want there to be any boundaries, but if there are, then there are. I appreciate you more than you know because every time I see that you are on the computer, I am energized and relieved. you bring a smile to my face without even saying a word. thank you. thank you. thank you for being who you are and for writing to me. i had a great time visiting you last night.
from the best girl you've ever known (haha, jk)"

This is the translation I got from http://babelfish.altavista.com/womanesetoenglish:

"Ronin, I,

want to thank you for kissing me, I want you to date me but continue to be a friend as well. I am sexually attracted to you. I feel like I've known you all my life. I don't know you that well. Lets be friends, but by friends I mean ƒuckbuddies. Don't be uncomfortable (I'm getting to you, huh?). Kiss me like we're more than friends. I am attracted to you. You think I don't know what I wan't, you're right. I am your emotional tampon. Do to me as you wish, if you can't, don't. I like IM'ing you, you are an excellent emotional tampon. I rock."

Your two-word translation of the day is: ƒuck me!!!

 

[vdk]

Next her. Whenever a woman gives me ******** cr@p like that I withdraw, espicially if it has the words 'friends' in it. If she likes me she will call me and say 'why havnt you called'. If she has low IL she wont bother. Saves me time from trying to decypher the ********.

 

[Paranoid]

I think she is ready to 'commit" herself to a relationship.Not once in the email did she say or even hint, that wants to LJBF you.In fact, I have a slight feeling that she regrets LJBF'ing you.

"You are terrific, and if you want to kiss me goodnight, go for it. in 8 months I have grown closer to you than to anyone else, and sometimes I get the urge to make my flirtatious comments a reality, but i don't know why, i get more shy with you too. i can imagine that you must think i'm silly, immature, maybe even slighly "wacko"."

The clincher over here is "but i don't know why, i get more shy with you too".Ever had this feeling before where you really liked a girl but for some reason became too shy in front of her?


"but i think the truth is that emotionally i am your sweetpea, , and physically i don't want there to be any boundaries, but if there are, then there are."

Over here, she wants to let loose.Emotionally she is ready for the relationship, but she is not sure on what you want (or so I assume).Hence the line "I don't want any boundaries, but if there are, then there are." Not once does she say that the boundary that she is referring to might be concerned to her or else she would not have used the words "but if there are."

"i appreciate you more than you know because every time I see that you are on the computer, I am energized and relieved. you bring a smile to my face without even saying a word. thank you. thank you. thank you for being who you are and for writing to me. i had a great time visiting you last night.
from the best girl you've ever known (haha, jk)"

Over here, the over-emphasis on the word "thank-you" doesn't make sense to me at all...


Hope this helps, but I would be interested in what others have to say.

Paranoid.

 

[Paranoid]

MVP, even I had the feeling that she wanted to be phuck buddies witrh him...but going over the rest of email, it doesn't make much sense.

This part of the email coveys that message that had me thinking otherwise

"I know I said lets me friends, and that's where i am, but I like the kind of friends we are, where we can goof around, be flirty and fun and I wouldn't take anything back. So, just don't second guess yourself at all. You are terrific, and if you want to kiss me goodnight, go for it. "

My initial reaction was "He has got himself a phuckbuddy".
But well, lets see what others think.

 

[NatureGuy]

I'd say she really likes you. It has taken
her some time to reach that point, and
you didn't deter her by the great way you handled things with her in
the past (particularly when that other
guy intervened). I'm not sure, but
I think next time you see her try a little
more than kissing. I'm assuming you're
romantically interested in her - otherwise just keep her as a friend !

 

[Krassus]

Summary:

"I changed my mind. I no longer want to be friends. I want you to fvck my brains out! But to do that, you're gonna have to quit being a wuss and make the move! Do it already, dammit!"

With that said, there's nothing to translate. This isn't ********. She's being very direct and clear. There are no alternate interpretations. If a girl says she likes you and wants to be more than friends, then that's just it. Go for it. She wants you man!

Edit: i'm adding Walden and vdk to my ignore list. I'm no longer interested in hearing anything they have to say about women.

 

[iqqi]

i think she likes you, but she is afraid of rejection. either that or she wants to be fbuddies.

yeah. that chic sounds confused as hell!

 

[bman]

basically, she was wondering why you didnt **** her during the movie date. seriously.... who has girls over to watch a movie and doesnt make a move on her?

 

[JustDoItAlways]

The infamous and very rare coming from a woman "LJBF-reversal" and staight-out "let's fvck".

I agree with Krassus that this is not ********. Its actually English.

So do your job and do her. Just keep it cool and don't go overboard thinking she wants to live happily ever after. If she wants something more than just a fvck-buddy and wants to get more serious, I'm assuming she will let know just like in this email.

But you really have to tell us how you moved her from LJBF to here. What happened after the initial dates? Was it just that she got rid of the other dude she was seeing (about a month ago I guess)?

 

[JohnJones]

Regardless of whether she's saying she'll be your girlfriend or wants a relationship, she is definately saying she wants you to put more moves on her.

Once you do that, she'll think you're an even better "problem solver."

How old is she?

 

[chlywly]

Lol wow, that has got to be the hardest ********, i've read! she's got her own dialect lol... Pigeon ********, anyways yeah its pretty much I changed my mind, I want you, i'm all yours.

 

[Zephyrus]

I'd Next her... why?

Because it's been 8 months.

At some point in time she said lets be friends, and she's still there... but what's even more surprising is YOU are still there.

You must have been an emotional tampon to her, you've had deep conversation, (and lots of it!) which of course leads straight to friendville...

it sounds to me like she's finally come to the conclusion that she can't find another man right now, so you'll do.

Like any good man would do, Bang her and see what happens, but you'll be on an emotional roller coaster. Good luck with that.


I hope that Helps.
Zephyrus

 

[MR_PERFECT]

Originally posted by Zephyrus
I'd Next her... why?

Because it's been 8 months.

At some point in time she said lets be friends, and she's still there... but what's even more surprising is YOU are still there.

You must have been an emotional tampon to her, you've had deep conversation, (and lots of it!) which of course leads straight to friendville...

it sounds to me like she's finally come to the conclusion that she can't find another man right now, so you'll do.

Like any good man would do, Bang her and see what happens, but you'll be on an emotional roller coaster. Good luck with that.


I hope that Helps.
Zephyrus

Ding, ding, ding. He's the only guy that got it right. Ronin I, you should have been giving out a prize for this one.

You are her last resort. If you really like her, you should let this go. She will eventually find a guy she wants to be more than friends with. She needs the attention you are giving her. If after 8 months, she just wants to be f- buddies, that doesn't say much about her interest level.

 

[Player_Supreme]

Originally posted by Zephyrus
I'd Next her... why?

Because it's been 8 months.

At some point in time she said lets be friends, and she's still there... but what's even more surprising is YOU are still there.

You must have been an emotional tampon to her, you've had deep conversation, (and lots of it!) which of course leads straight to friendville...

it sounds to me like she's finally come to the conclusion that she can't find another man right now, so you'll do.

Like any good man would do, Bang her and see what happens, but you'll be on an emotional roller coaster. Good luck with that.


I hope that Helps.
Zephyrus

1. I agree with most of what Zephrus is saying.

2. You have an amazing stamina to wait 8 months for a woman, and deep pockets to keep paying for dates and trips.

3. But if you like her that much then step up and try to take it all the way.

4. My read on this is that you will never be more than friends. She allowed you to kiss her good nite because of all the time and money that you've spent and all the time she spent crying on your shoulder about the probably jerky real man that is causing her those emotional ups and downs. You've probably lost her respect along time ago. But women will give out mercy f*ucks if you beg them long enough.

I have a friend who mastered the art of keeping men waiting. One fool took her on dates for 6 months before she finally called it quits...but that was because they got into an argument over his prejudice beliefs.

5. I find it amazing that a woman will string a dude on while she is in a relationship with an ass*hole type and use him as an emotional tampon. I hate reading about that crap. I do admire a mans stamina to be the other man who listens to her troubles while she goes back to "him" to get used sexually, while the "other man" is waiting for a possible chance some where in the long future for a chance to ride it...sorry to be so blunt but that's what you will do eventually.

6. By reading her email to you she is still undecided. she is still waiting for a man to come along....she is opening the door for you because of your dilligence and persistance...

but why would you want a mercy f*uck...just to get out of your misery???

In my opinion you shoulda quit along time ago when you found out that she was seeing someone else. Most women will be faithful until the lasts days when they can't take it anymore...but they still enjoy the male attention and being persued by men so they will find a symp (sympathizer who solves their problems and let's them cry on their shoulders and stuff like that) to string along.

In 8 months of problem solving she still hasn't taken your advice? The reason is because they really don't want your advice. They just want someone to listen to them whine.

Good luck in your persuit of this one.

 

[Krassus]

I'm losing faith in sosuave people! Can't you read? They went out a COUPLE OF TIMES during THREE MONTHS that ended FIVE MONTHS AGO. And yet here we have a dozen people who are apparently under the impression that he's been taking her out paid dates for 8 months?

Where are you getting all this? She's been showing high IL for MONTHS, CLEARLY she IS interested. Its gotten to the point where she's practically ASKING for a fvck! And you're telling this guy to next her? At the very least, what he has here is a potential fvck buddy! It's be DOWNRIGHT STUPID to pass this opportunity by.

Whew, had to vent