Help me bring him around

shedevil's ex

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I see people calling you names and barking at you and it doesn't piss me off nearly as bad as your comments.

You don't back down, you don't hold back - you move on!

For the love of God, it isn't what you DO it is everything you ARE.

And by saying this crap about backing down means you are trying to change yourself to fit him. This is wrong.

You can be so damn dim, take the same example as before, I'll tell it to you in a man's point of view.

You sat in his lap - him: fine ass parked on my d*ck.
You put your arms around his neck - him: great breasts against my chest.
You chatted - him: you purred.
Your version - just the normal you, no seduction.
His version: - Sex goddess offering me beer.

I not being crude - Im not talking as your ex, Im talking like every man would.

Your wore a pale pink dress with a hundred buttons. Every GD one of us wanted to bite them off. Hell, you came out to the pool, the light from the house shined right through. You want to know why we didn't get out all that fast, cause half of us were sporting. And you not knowing you do this to a man makes it all the sexier. Gothic guy fell back and sank to the bottom, you blew him away.

Had I been a better man I would have told Gothic guy to go fetch and just how to do it, maybe all he needs is a good man to man.

You realize you can't bring him around. You are going to work this over and keep trying new ways. Don' go in the backdoor on this and start changing who you are. It's not what you say or do, it is the way you are, you need to stay the way you are.

Don't let him suck the life out of you. He wont be happy until he has you in a bibbed apron with sensible shoes. Damn, I wish you never met this as$.

He is palying you he could be the damn spokeman for this page. He is going to try to bring you down to his level, he going to try to smother you. He in over his head wont admit it and let you go.

Baby, the game being played here is called taking, you don't know how to take, he doesn't know how to give, move on.

If I see him start to smother and overpower you I'll step in, I swear I will.

I hate to say this, I wish to God he would smack youI wish he slap you just once. Then you would fight, you would claw his eyes out and tie his d*ck in a knot so fast he wouldn't know what hit him. Where is your fight against this emotional and mental abuse he is doing? Physically I know you are hurting too, I know you.

You have always wondered what it is that makes a woman stay with an abusive man. You have asked many times what makes a woman fail to protect herself and keep going back to abusers?

Well, baby, why do they???
 

ShortTimer

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Originally posted by SheDevil
just curious how did you end up in the same house as your ex?
...My ex is in the military, 30 yrs next month, 9/01 his department went mobile, no home base at all, so when he is in the states and off for some time he stays w/ his brothers, in Florida, I invited them over, too tipsy to drive home, they all crashed at my house.
Hold on a minute here, let's review the facts:

1.) You've been hard up for sex for some time, and

2.) You invited over a guy who you were attracted to that was not your boyfriend.

…and you want us to believe sex somehow "just happened"... uh huh...

I've seen this kind of behavior plenty of times before by just about every woman I've known. This didn't "just happen" this was premeditated. You set the situation up and made it happen. Of course every one I've known who did this also pleaded innocence about the whole thing; I really am just amazed at a woman's ability to lie to herself about her own actions.

The best part: “I won’t tell him unless he asks.” The effect of this being that you get to have everything you wanted: hot sex from another man and keep your current one. Machiavelli would be proud, good work. I swear to god women are incapable of actually human love. :rolleyes:

In a way I've always had to admire this kind of cold-blooded efficiency it takes to pull off such a move, although most of the time I've seen it happen it took the girl longer to pull it off; in fact one chick's mastah plan took about four months to come to fruition.

Everything that has transpired has done so according to your design. There were no random events here, there was no "omg what did I do!" with big innocent eyes!

Please, save us and save yourself the deception.

Yet again another good example of why women make me feel empty inside.

Edit: I just read your ex's post before I submitted this, I'm sure you noticed but for the dim-witted reading this thread: he wants you back.
 

LikRetsam

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Originally posted by SheDevil
You agreed to some strict rules signing on to this site, I believe in those rules and will address the enforcement of them with the mods on this site.
[...]
Get the hell off this site, get your chores done, Mom will be home soon!
Said the woman posting in the Mature Man forum.

As for the rest of your ego boosting post, I find it most unwise to consider all 16 year olds immature. A certain amount of respect is requested of you.

Unfortunate that what I have learned in 16 years you do not even begin to fathom at 40.
 

SheDevil

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ShortTimer- You don't have the whole picture. I try to keep my posts breif so the artist formally known as P_S doesn't flame me again for being long winded and Walden doesn't blast me off to a quilting bee.

I'll need names: ex= GI Joe (Joe) lover= Gothic Guy (Goth)

Joe came here UNINVITED to find a down-trodden, depressed man with low self-esteem. He didn't and it pissed him off. Thus, he is posting these different angles. He has tried the "I scare him" tactic now he is trying the "abuse" tactic. If you must read his text see it through a "wanting to reconcile" ex, better yet ignore him, I do.

Get these facts straight:
I DID NOT INVITE Joe - proof to follow.
Goth's leaving wasn't planned until the last min., believe it or not.

My only "dim-witted" move was to talk to Joe last Thursday, about this thread.

The next day I got several PM's from people here stating Joe had posted, on the Main or General Forum, a sort of Wanted Dead or Alive statement and indicated he was on his way.

That's when we spoke about his visit. We battled and settled on a peaceful, family filled visit only if Goth would be comfortable.

The "devilish" thoughts set in. I'll admit it - IT HAD BEEN 11 MONTHS!!! (does no one hear this part)

I didn't go running back into his arms, I didn't profess some undying love for him. We fuked, flesh meeting flesh, need meeting need, not made love, not had sex, just a little fuking release! IT HAD BEEN ....nevermind.

I'm not here with innocent weepy eyes and I am totally accountable for my actions, were they "according to my resolve" and "premeditated" as you accuse, no. Did I role w/ the improptu events, you betcha...

No, I am not going to crush Goth w/ this, but I won't lie if he asks.

ST, this MISTAKEN, REGRETABLE, NEVER TO BE REPEATED tumble wasn't about love or commitment. It was an imperfect woman, FULLY CAPABLE OF HUMAN LOVE, slipping up.

IT DOES NOT change my goals for Goth and myself. I want to further my relationship with him. It was a wonderful weekend. No sex, yet.

Goth built a fire in the backyard Friday night. He bought hay. We curled up for many hours together. (too sappy for this site, but great just the same)

After lots of wine he asked me, "What do you think is wrong with me, why do I have this problem?" No further explanation.

I said the very first thing that came into my "dim-witted" head, "Nothing, everything we want will happen in due time, it's worth the wait."

I don't know if I said the right thing, it felt right then, it changed our pace a little.

He felt even more relaxed and I hope to took away some of his self-inflicted pressure.

I'll stay the course with him; I have no indecision on that.

Your turn ST - You speak in generalized terms and express your views being from an observation stand point. You love to use the grouping term of "Women" as in "Women make me feel...Women aren't capable..."

Well, I am calling your bluff - Who was she and what did she hit you with? Why do you use her to compare and classify 'all' women? I can't see your dim views and opinions being developed via this surveillance tactic you keep expressing. Be as accountable as you preach. Are you capable, any longer, of human love? Or are you going to maintain a safe distance and just cast your judgements. I think you almost drowned in a relationship, are you ever going to go back in the water, or just stay on the edge?
 

Big Pappy

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Not sure I want to read through 5 pages of dialog to get through all this.

Was there a specific question somebody wanted to be answered?
 

SheDevil

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Big Pappy You are right - I truly apologize to you and the other mature men for my intrusion.

I need to take the bouquet of beautiful thoughts you all offered and leave.

I do Thank you all from the bottom of my heart.


Yours truly, SheDevil
 

ShortTimer

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Originally posted by SheDevil
ShortTimer- You don't have the whole picture.
I'm sure I don't, I can only go by what is said, and here is what I find interesting. First you say this:

Originally posted by SheDevil
My ex ...w/ his brothers, in Florida, I invited them over
Then you say this:

Originally posted by SheDevil
Joe came here UNINVITED
So which is it, did you invite him or not?

Originally posted by SheDevil
The "devilish" thoughts set in. I'll admit it - IT HAD BEEN 11 MONTHS!!! (does no one hear this part)
Well in our new egalitarian world I'm supposed to judge men and women by the same standards so let me say this: IT DOESN'T MATTER HOW LONG IT'S BEEN. That does not excuse cheating, nor does it mitigate it. We hear you about how long it's been, it just doesn't matter.

Like I said, in our egalitarian world we are supposed to judge men and women equally, so I'll tell you what I'd tell a man who came to me and was thinking about cheating because he wasn't getting any: suck it up and take it like a man. Burry you feelings, they will do you no good.

I'm sure for some of the men who have found this board for the first time and they read your post they might think: "oh my god, sex once a year! I wish I could get it that often!" At the risk of sharing way too much, it's been over a year and a half since I even touched a vagina. Before that it had been three or almost four years, so please understand how others in my situation won't feel sorry for you going only 11 months.

Originally posted by SheDevil
I didn't go running back into his arms, I didn't profess some undying love for him. We fuked, flesh meeting flesh, need meeting need, not made love, not had sex, just a little fuking release! IT HAD BEEN ....nevermind.
Is this supposed to make the cheating any better? It doesn't really, actually it makes it worse because you're saying that you'd risk losing your man over nothing. Allegedly he's something of value to you, and now here you are saying you'd be willing to give up a value for a nothing. Would you light a $100 bill on fire so easily? Would you just let your house burn down?

Originally posted by SheDevil
Well, I am calling your bluff - Who was she and what did she hit you with? Why do you use her to compare and classify 'all' women? I can't see your dim views and opinions being developed via this surveillance tactic you keep expressing. Be as accountable as you preach.
That would be an entire thread unto itself, so I'll say this: it wasn't just ONE that did it to me, it was several, but one did start the whole process.

Do you watch the show Smallville? I like the show because I can identify with the character of Lex Luther. The father-son dynamic between him and Lynol (his father) is something I find I can relate to, except that for me personally it's a mother-son thing.

Sure, maybe dad wasn't always around when I needed him while I was growing up. Maybe he didn't pay me enough mind when I wanted it but nothing he did was severely damaging. It took mommy to make me a twisted ****.

Originally posted by SheDevil Are you capable, any longer, of human love? Or are you going to maintain a safe distance and just cast your judgements.
If I fell in love it would be to a rare woman, most are too submissive for me. I could never love a woman who "needed" me. As for casting judgments, well: 'judge and prepare to be judged' as they say.
 

SheDevil

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In Sept 2004 you all allowed me to whine on this site about my desire to enhance my current relationship. You all tolerated my stubborness and strong will.

I said things like:

-Help me bring him around, this celibate relationship is making me fray.
-Wont his instinct kick in?
-I tell him I want to be intimate.

You all encouraged me to:

-Show him what you want, dont just tell him.
-Protect yourself, watch out for you first.
-Be the reward, quit chasing

Did I listen to your wisdom? Did I do what was suggested?

NO, I went the SheDevil route and hit rock bottom, very loudly and very emotionally.

It really could not have been any worse.

If my man wasn't sick and twisted at this point, well this probably would have done it.

See, I wouldnt show him the intimacy I wanted, so in turn he thought I did not want it. (actions speak louder than words)

I didnt protect myself, so I ended up yelling, crying and hurting him.

I wasnt his reward; instead I became his rival and challenged him, only to hurt him more.

As I clawed my way up from the pit of hell I had entered I began to listen to you.

I knew, now, that I needed to show him that I love him. I needed to make my desires prevalent to protect him (and me) from this GOD AWFUL display of temper and need I was exhibiting.

So, I DID IT, I TOOK YOUR ADVICE and did it.

Now I say things like:

-Wait, I don't think I can handle another orgasm.
-Oh, God, baby, you are truly wonderful.
-Yes, I do want to do it again.

We have tried to romance it up a little but still end up panting on the floor.

We have a lot of time to make up for.

I think I almost lost consciousness once or twice.

I am a victim of a very blissful, erotic war with a very worthy opponent.

He is unchaining, I feel it every time we are together, little by little he is releasing what ever had him so bound. Each time I feel more and more freedom in him.

So I will say, THANK YOU, with all my heart.

These were very hard steps for be, but so worth it.

I just want to encourage anyone else that is wanting, desiring or longing, to take the steps, they may not lead you where you want but at least you will be moving.

The idleness, the wait is so much harder and can eat at you until you hit the wall.

Thank you all so much and I wish you all a very special holiday season and a happy new year in the arms of your perfect other.

All my love, SheDevil
 

ShortTimer

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Oh joy! You've posted! *rubs hands together*

Originally posted by SheDevil
In Sept 2004 you all allowed me to whine on this site
And whine you did, this is shocking honesty from a woman. :D ;)

Originally posted by SheDevil
Now I say things like:

-Wait, I don't think I can handle another orgasm.
-Oh, God, baby, you are truly wonderful.
-Yes, I do want to do it again.Did I listen to your wisdom? Did I do what was suggested?
I sense a great distrubance in the Force... as though your ex will make another whiney post.

Originally posted by SheDevil
Thank you all so much and I wish you all a very special holiday season and a happy new year in the arms of your perfect other.

All my love, SheDevil
What? This is it? No inflamitory overgenralized statements? *pout* and I do so love to fight. So will this be your last post on the site?
 
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Mrs Devil, you are indeed a poet - I can tell that this scenario of yours expressed in writing was a revealing as well as a healing process for you. Learn from it and become better!
 

SheDevil

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Dearest ShortTimer - Yes, I missed you too.

This woman will do anything for her man, even whine, beg and plead for help, if that what it takes.

It was so hard, BUT all so worth it!


Oh, my ex, what a dear. He and I are going through some changes at this time. Some of his posts are just the results of "growing pains" because we are growing apart. Take it easy on him, he is really trying to do better.

As far as posting again, this is a man's playground, not for women or for kids. I can respect that. I feel men need to have their space and do man things here and in their life.

I cant promise I wont post again, but I'll try not the whine if I do.



PRL - I am learning so much from my very magnificent teacher.

I am also learning a lot from this site and others like it.

I know one thing, I dont want him to ever 'want' again.

I want to meet his needs before he even knows he has a need.

So I will continue to read these sites, I'll see issues men are facing and make sure my man doesnt have to face them.

I will do everything in my power to offer to him a life full of devotion with no end.

Settle for no less in your life!!!

Hugs and Kisses, SheDevil
 
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"I know one thing, I dont want him to ever 'want' again.

I want to meet his needs before he even knows he has a need."


If only there were more women out there like this. I'd find one and settle down completely and totally.
 

Eileen

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Originally posted by Metaphysikal_Lover
"I know one thing, I dont want him to ever 'want' again.

I want to meet his needs before he even knows he has a need."


If only there were more women out there like this. I'd find one and settle down completely and totally.
Yea, for a week or so, then you'd be bored.
 
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Originally posted by Eileen
Yea, for a week or so, then you'd be bored.
I can guarantee you that I would not be bored with someone who give 100% of themselves.

You have the wrong impression of me...and it's my fault. I am looking for a soul mate, and I will not rest until I find her.

I've been in the game to get the skills that I need in order to step to her. My mate is gonna be way above the average and back when I was a kid, I didn't possess the ability to pull her.



metaphysikal_lover: a female should always give 100% cause it's in her nature...I choose to give 100% by choice
metaphysikal_lover: men we don't have big hearts by design
tacoma : yeah
metaphysikal_lover: You have a lot of love left in you to give baby
metaphysikal_lover: I can feel that in some of your words
tacoma : i know but i am saving it for some one who really wants it baby
metaphysikal_lover: and the way you ask questions
metaphysikal_lover: I feel you babygirl
metaphysikal_lover: as you should


metaphysikal_lover: and that person should get all 100%
metaphysikal_lover: of what you have
tacoma : he will
metaphysikal_lover: I'm not looking for a F*ck on this internet. I'm looking for one special woman. I can get a F*ck anywhere any day

Now I do.

Life is a journey and I've been on a long assed one!
 
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