Help me bring him around

dietzcoi

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THis is a waste of time. The guy will never change, not at our age.

I have no advice since I think this is hopeless. You might as well ask for advice on how to walk on water.

Speaking of which, doesn't this once again prove my point about the destructive elements of religion? WHy would any religion brainwash their members against sex? Didn't God create sex?

THis is the most extreme case I have heard of but I am sure there are tens of thousands of others who are fukked up about sexuality.

The horror, the horror!

Dietzcoi
 
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Originally posted by WaterTiger


Jealous? ME? Showing jealousy means that I think I have some form of ownership on you, O-He-Who-Can-Never-Be-Tamed. And we all know that is not the case... ;)
[/B]
LOL

I can be tammed. Just buy me a box of 3 stooges videos and put on the cartoon network and I am docile as a baby shark. Hell I'd even rub ya feet and your back for you.
 

SheDevil

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Originally posted by princelydeeds
Get the guy really drunk ( I mean just short of passing out). The whole time you are drinking start taking off items of clothing. Get him down to his underwear. Start kissing on his stomach. Sit/kneel on the floor between his knees. Brush up against him like a cat. Whisper in his ear and Rub your breasts on him. Put your coochie on his leg. Never talk about sex just keep talking about very fun things. When he gets aroused or semi-aroused just grab his c00ck and play with it. Do it like its no big deal. When he is really aroused, start sucking his C00ck. Tell him what a big D!!ck he has and how great it is in your mouth. Tell him you fantasize about him everyday and let him know you will be patient and wait till hes ready. If that works try little things like that often eventually he should come out of his shell.

Honestly I think he's got issues but if what I suggested doesnt work then sugest medical help. He might be some sort of closet Homo.
You are too precious - I printed the text this morning as I ran out the door. I was reading all the wonderful advise from everyone during a mediation hearing. YOU almost cost me $100 for laughing. Thanks, thats a little bigger step then I feel he is ready for but I'll archive it for future use.
 

Don Juanabbe

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This closet homo thing is alot more prevalent than you think.

*shudder*

I was exchanging stories with P_S about my encounter with a closet homo at the pub. The f*cker gave up on me and then went after my 58 year old neighbour, who promptly smacked him one. :D Haven't seen the homo since. I think I should've done that to begin with, but I was too stunned.

They're fooking everywhere man - look out!!
 

SheDevil

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I have taken little "smackerals" of everyone great advice (except for those who say RUN!) and put it in the events for our night. The stage is set, I splurgged on a great body/brow wax. I am pumped!! Tonight is going to be great, we will go beyond where we have gone before, more comfortably then we have gone before. I am SURE of it!!!

Player - Damn straight - I love to win. The power I feel is a drunkeness. In my personal life I am competitive, I love challenges, if I lose it pisses me off, I sulk, brood and change the rules until I WIN. I am "mulish" as my ex used to call me. In my professional life I have to win - if I don't children suffer. I will always win.

Why are his touches better? His touches, tastes and moves are laced with a primal edge. His hands feel like they are experiencing "newness", I can watch his eyes follow where his hands roam as if he is drinking in all he is discovering. He verbally expresses what I feel is in his mind. Breathy words like, "so soft" or "so warm". I don't really know if he is aware he is speaking aloud. When I kiss or lick him he moves so I get the best place, he holds very still and soaks in the stimulation he is receiving. He holds my hands againt his face or in his hair so he can memorize the feel. He becomes saturated in the moment as if encountering something so new, so intriguing and so entrancing. I hear and feel his breath and voice and feel I could orgasm with no other stimulation but this. This, sir, is good.

When things start to become deeper entrenched I see his look become more of a blankness, his focus goes from us to just inches from his face - his breath changes from heated pleasure to panic stricken. WHAT ENTERED HIS MIND AT THIS POINT!!! God I want to know this SO BADLY!!! I might as well get up and open the door because I know he is going to bolt. I have tried backing down, but it is too late.

With out him telling me I know he has (probably) never been touched intimately by a woman. I know he has experienced some sexual orgasms, many masturbated ones, but I don't think any sensual ones. It is hard to think or understand this, I have to keep reminding myself of this so I can keep closer to his level.

(I wish I knew how you did that quote thing)

Anyway, your words, "Is it because you want to finish this one so bad that your anticipation is working over time?" "finish this one" sounds rather horish, it's not like I'm lining them up and taking them down. Jeez, I'll take it as - Do I find him more of a challenge and can't walk away because I'll see is as losing? Used to, don't now. Re-read his touch, I do crave him. Not just sexually but as the decent, respectable man he is. He was forced to leave his family with nothing. He lived at a half way house until he could get a job, he found an apartment and hit the books. He stumbled through another mistaken marriage, he built a home with his hands for her, just what she wanted. She chastized him every chance she got. He still kept going, he worked for different counties as a surveyor. He has climbed and studied his way up to an Urban developer for the state. He has a confidence buried in himself, I just know it. Recently I went to Tallahassee to watch him speak infront of every county and city planer in the state. The confidence and determination just oozed.

Your words "Enjoying this game with him, the waiting and building" You, player, Are Wrong. His life and well being is not a game. I don't f**k people around for my own thrill of the chase. How could any one find that satisfying. I get in the face of Thugs, Users and Hos daily, it has taught me that decent people, like him, are rare and cherishable. He is fragile, everyone is in a sense. You don't f**k with peoples lives!! You take people wholly as they are, if you can't accept them that way - leave. I accept him as he is - he is unhappy with his life sexually, I am not out to change him, just encourage. I don't consider this power, I consider it being a supportive lover.

Now you must do one thing for me, Your friend who was raped, Please drill in her head the fact she was an UNDESERVING VICTIM of VIOLENCE. What she went through was not a SEXUAL act it was VIOLENCE. Like being stabbed, mugged or beaten. She was VICTIMIZED. She's not responsible for that act but she is responsible for the help she needs now. She must take care of her well being. Be there for her. Crisis centers are sometimes helpful, but push her if she needs to be pushed.

Thanks!!
 

Buck Toff

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I'm a musician. I once played in a band with a semi-famous guy who was down on his luck after being kicked out of the other band that had brought him success.

The first band kicked him out because of his drinking. He'd spent the past ten years on a tour bus getting sh*tfaced every day for free.

He moved in with a girl in town and was looking for a band to play in. My buddy was convinced we should start up a band with this guy and tour the world.

Only problem was the drinking hadn't stopped. No problem. My friend has a big ego and figures that he could succeed where everyone else failed: cleaning this musician up.

He locks the poor drunk in the house with no booze for days at a time, along with a whole bunch of other hairbrained schemes. This went on for about a year, and each time the rockstar went back to the sauce.

We played our inaugural show to great fanfare and success, but that was it. Boozy and his girl were on the outs so he jumped on a plane home to sober up. It's seven years later, and he never came back, and he never quit drinking.

My friend had failed to convert this guy into a clean living rocker(oxymoron), yet he was the one who really felt betrayed by the alcoholic. Silly man.

I came away with the lesson that no matter how hard you want something, it just might not ever happen. Then again, if you must, have fun trying.
 
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"Now you must do one thing for me, Your friend who was raped, Please drill in her head the fact she was an UNDESERVING VICTIM of VIOLENCE. What she went through was not a SEXUAL act it was VIOLENCE. Like being stabbed, mugged or beaten. She was VICTIMIZED. She's not responsible for that act but she is responsible for the help she needs now. She must take care of her well being. Be there for her. Crisis centers are sometimes helpful, but push her if she needs to be pushed."

I did. And she did. She is over it. She quit the religion and haven't looked back.

Good luck with our miracle man. And good luck with being you.
 

SheDevil

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Buck Toff - Thanks for the analogy. I know the point you are making and appreciate it very much. I have, yes mule headed me, have walked away from some situations, not being able to understand the phenomenon that keeps people going back in harms way.

My Friday night just fell apart.

I confronted him, I pleaded for him to tell me what it was that keeps plopping down between us in bed. I was addressing it in a sensitive manner, but got nowhere. I challenged him, I expressed doubt in his trust of me, I told him that I'll continue to understand when he tells me what the hell I am supposed to understand. I came right out and asked him if he wants our relationship to become more intimate, does he want to make love with me? He looked at me (quite shocked) and finally said, "more then life itself". He walked out, I got dressed and followed to find he left. He has never left. But he was gone.

I feel I've been punched in the gut. God, his voice was so thick w/ emotion when he said that. It's not just my heart that's hurt it feels like my bones ache. Since the hurricane, I have had no venue for communication with him. (Maybe I needed my hands tired) It didn't help being w/out power, phone or any form of distraction. I've spent my weekend in the dark and in tears, thinking and lecturing myself that I must go on. The next move will be his, I can't extend anymore, I am just emotionally exhausted.

Yeah, I should know better. Yeah, people told me so. I have beaten myself up over this, when I grow up maybe I'll learn to listen. Thanks again to all. XOXOXO SheDevil
 

Buck Toff

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Whatever the eventual solution, hugs to you, sounds like you need 'em: ((((SheDevil))))
 
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IT AINT OVER YET.

Your responding as a woman. Not a playa. And never mind that crap about not being one, cause now you are one. A playa can work with just one main interest. What sets you apart is your determination to come out on top.

I call a DJ a playa. The difference is that many dj's just want one relationship. LTR. When you seek to educate yourself then you step into another level of the game.

And life my dear is a game as they tell us. "the game of life."

In a game the object is to win. In your other game ie your work you seek to win. Your on top of your game. You don't get emotional over shyt...

Your game with this man is leaking. Your losing your game. You need to get back on top of your head and see a way clear.

Think with your mind not your emotions. I realize that your a woman and that is the space that you ladies come from and some of the effiminate men on this site..lol. But that doesn't mean that you gotta get rapped up.

Now your man, and I hate to bring this back up...but he got married to a woman from the same religion. Are you aware that in the bible and historically men were suppose to be, and for want of better words, boning their women.

It is a commandmant from GOD.

Not calling him gay or anything. Just wondering why he broke gods commandments "be fruitfull and multiply" and never mind that junk about the wife not wanting it. Cause a man will take it.

I was married once also. I had take it on many occasions...3 times a day. I didn't find out until later that she had been sexually abused as a kid by an uncle and even then it still didn't deter my sexual appetite.

A man needs sexual relief. Your friend is all backed up and screwed up.

Let that shyt go Devil. Nothing good will come of it. Only a big dent in your pride.

I did like his words about "more than lifeitself" now that was good player material. I will have to use that one sometime...lol

Lata!
 

Buck Toff

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PlayerSupreme :
I realize that your a woman and that is the space that you ladies come from and some of the effiminate men on this site..lol.
You calling me EFFEMINATE because I realize some people need a hug!!?? What's with all you stoic "tough" guys, anyways? :rolleyes:

Now git over here and kiss me sailor.
:p
 
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Originally posted by Buck Toff
PlayerSupreme :

You calling me EFFEMINATE because I realize some people need a hug!!?? What's with all you stoic "tough" guys, anyways? :rolleyes:

Now git over here and kiss me sailor.
:p
Sorry Buck, Too my knowledge, I've never even seen your screen name before.

Who are you? And what are you talking about? And what is this hug stuff your mentioning????

:confused:
 

Buck Toff

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Player, just teasing. I have been posting on this thread and offered a hug for SheDevil as she was sounding a bit frustrated.
(Good coaches know that females respond well to emotional support).

About me, I'm new here, but I like to jump into things with both feet.
 

SheDevil

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Dear Buck - Thanks for being so observant - you saw me falling and offered me a soft place to land with your hugs. For that I thank you. I re-read my text and need to apologize for getting too sappy for a mature man's site. I have read the threads about under age tikes posting, as a mature woman I guess I should apologize for being intrusive myself on this manly site, but my text subjects a mature man (well at least a man, the mature part I am wondering about).

Take it easy on P_S. He is just throwing me bones. He is using phrases like "Let that shyt go" and "nothing good will come of it" to get this puppy off her sulky rump and back in the "game". He knows them there are fightin' words that fuel me pretty well.

Yes, I was responding like a woman BECAUSE I AM ONE, P_S!!

And, because I was losing, my mission seems to be further out of reach than ever.

Biblically, you are right-but with this religion sex has many rules. Never in daylight, missionary positions only, never during the womans period, never on the sabath, and probably more. Not up to playa par, I sure. I just know what he has told me. She cringed at his touch, she cried, not sobbed, he still took. Unfortunately, he feels like it was closer to marital rape over sex. The fruitful part was his decision to practice w/drawal. He felt a failure as a husband and her as a wife, parenthood was not something he wanted. He was told what caused babies. The Bible also states to 'go out and spread the Word', they stay in their community only. Pictures (self photos) aren't allowed, that is considered having "graven images". I have researched very little on the religion but I think it would really do a number on you raised this way from birth and relocating to a more secular society.

You said, sexually speaking, "a man will take it". Then you DO FEEL it is instinct. So do you think once whatever it is that is keeping him repressed is removed, instinct will kick in or is sex a more "learned thing" from boys locker room 101??? He had some damn good lessons somewhere, he just needs to work on his follow through.

LOL, "A man needs sexual releif" - Well here's some news, SO DOES A WOMAN. You want to talk about "backed up" October eighth will be our 11 month anniv. I could almost be considered a virgin again! and I don't like it.

I still haven't approached him, and won't, he took his toys and went home. I will play the game if HE returns, but new rules are being established. Rules containing words like communication, trust and openess. Three bad words when it comes to someone with lots of baggage.

He still is my beautiful f**ked up man and I do desire him.

Thanks again for my hugs and bones, my sulking is evolving to anger (borderline rage).

Take care, SheDevil
 
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Buck offered you a hug and I laced up my Jackboots to kick you in the ass...I guess maybe these sucka's on this site are correct about me!!!!!


1. For a man who has no sexual experiences what-so-ever, why or how does he know how to touch. When his world was so cold and barren? Where did he learn this. This doesn't come naturally.

2. Open your eyes Devil. I am beginning to get the feeling that your are getting played here, by what your writing. Of course I have no contact with the real situation. He is playing the role of the broken downtrodden man. You of course with your personality are trying to raise to the challenge.

3. You can't win em all you know. It's cop and blow in the dating game. Even as a woman the game has rules. Break em and you pay. Adhere and you prosper...ie nice dating experiences.

4. Your doing good by not calling him. If he TRUELY cares then he will call. And this silly long winded dance you two are doing can resume. The ball has always been in his course since your the one persuing.
 

SheDevil

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I think I have mislead somewhat -

He doesn't play the role of "downtrodden" at all, he is very confident and determined by nature, in our relationship, in his job, and just general interaction with others. He is very competative also.
The only time he becomes "unbalanced" when things get passionate.

I have a close friend I confided in a little while back. She was astonished when I told her about our inactivity. No way in hell would she believe me. She met him many times and just knew he was a great tumble. After I climbed her a$$ for thinking about him that way she gave me advise. (1) She'd keep him based on looks alone. (2) Pin him down and bring him into the 21st century. I don't know where he gets his moves, porn maybe, many people in this thread have said, "a man has needs, a man will take, a man needs sexual release" I was chalking it up to instinct.

I just had a vase of white roses plopped on my desk. The card read, "I hope these work, I couldn't find a flag"
See, this is good stuff.

He called and went on about not liking things this way, blah, blah, blah... Wants to get together tonight. I told him it is for talking only. Don't even come if he isn't going to offer me some kind of clarity. He told me he would fumble a bit but he would try. If he gives me one tiny ioda of a hint I will lap dance to Van Halan Spanked for him, naked!!

I am armed with a bottle of Jameson, a very wide mean streak, and a piss poor attitude.

I got slapped around yesterday on the job, the first time ever, the swine backhanded me right off the steps of his trailer, to make matters worse I hit the other side of my face on a water faucet on the way down and totally wrecked my eggplant heels. The boys in blue were there in just minutes and I carry, so the battle ended pretty fast. Between the lack of electricity for the 4th day, sore face, caboose and ego, I really don't give a crap what he has to say. I am trying to find some compassion somewhere before he arrives.
 

Lost In Translation

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normally i kick the crap out of women who post on this site ( think c-do ) but you are being honest and trying to help a man get his rocks off unlike old c-do who was trying to trap a young doctor.

so here goes....

i think you gotta approach this from a male DJ mind frame.

YOU ARE THE PRIZE

there are no unwilling victims

while ever you ALLOW him to act like a little b*tch HE WILL CONTINUE TO DO SO

i suggest you lay the law down on him pimp style

TELL him, you are a catch and that unless he gets his act together he can be miserable ALONE

call his bluff

***OR***

play hard to get

you beg him for sex MAYBE you are turning him off

think about it....

for 10 years or how ever long he was married HE HAD TO FORCE HIMSELF upon some messed up b*tch

you coming on all strong is FREAKING HIM OUT

you are short circuiting his brain

think of it like role playing

you play VERY hard to get, which is what he is used to

he will force/try and have sex which is what he is used to

act like what his brain thinks a women should act like ( messed up i know )

until you can help him ( sex )

***OR***

get him really really drunk and rape him


3 options , somehow i think no.2 option is the G O, but option no.3 is your plan B ;)




Lost In Translation

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ShortTimer

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Originally posted by SheDevil
You said, sexually speaking, "a man will take it". Then you DO FEEL it is instinct.
Perhaps it's a strong impulse, but it's not an instinct. An instinct is something you can't control; you have no free will to stop it. However, any way to you want to look at it this impulse / instinct CAN be broken.

A guy named Harlow did an interesting experiment where he raised rhesus monkeys without mothers. Both the male and female monkeys who were raised like this avoided intimacy as adults. The females would have to be held down by a male for sex to happen (the females would then kill the offspring produced), and the males were chased around the cages by the females and never wound up mating. Human children with similar ****ty upbringings displayed similar behavior patterns to the monkeys.

Your man's facing the hedgehog's dilemma. He wants to be intimate, but doing so hurts him.

Leaving him is the best option, saving that; just tie him up and rape him. :p
 
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SheDevil, your approach and stance is deep in error - you are extremely aggressive for him - maybe he doesn't like your constant aggrression and you taking the initiative and always pressuring him - stop it!!

Don't pursue him, let him pursue you!!!! He is the man and not you!! He may see your constant forcefulness as less than feminine!

If he doesn't want you that way and this is unacceptable to you than move on! Talk about role reversals - this takes the cake!:rolleyes:

DJ Dietzcoi - religion does not shape men it is men (people) who shape religion - so this has nothing to do with religion or God it has to do with people and how they think and believe and thus behave!
 

Don't always be the one putting yourself out for her. Don't always be the one putting all the effort and work into the relationship. Let her, and expect her, to treat you as well as you treat her, and to improve the quality of your life.

Quote taken from The SoSuave Guide to Women and Dating, which you can read for FREE.

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