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Have you ever purposely withheld sex from a girl?

FlexpertHamilton

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My libido is extremely low right now, to the point where I don't even want to have sex, and when I do, I tend to feel depressed after.

I am also abstaining from porn and masturbation, and I would rather free up and repurpose my sexual energy towards more important things rather than trying to distract myself with something that I don't even enjoy anymore.

I have an FWB going on for 4 months now and while there is a zero percent chance I will ever take her seriously enough for an LTR, I would like to keep her on retainer, though I'm fully prepared to lose her over this.

I think it will be an interesting case study, it might be similar to trying to "friendzone" a girl which can have interesting results when the man holds the frame and makes the call himself. If anyone is curious I'll let you know what happens lol.
 
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Sega Genesis

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My libido is extremely low right now, to the point where I don't even want to have sex, and when I do, I tend to feel depressed after.
I'm sorry to hear this @FlexpertHamilton .

I'm wondering though if you're actually depressed (first), and that's why you lack the desire for sex?

And having sex exacerbates the depression?

Depression can do that, it kinda numbs you. Speaking from experience.

Have you seen or talked to a doctor about it?
 

Divorced w 3

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If she’s not deeply emotionally invested you, she’s going to leave you if you stop banging her and she may develop a bit of a complex if you don’t explain to her that you’re going through something. Do her the courtesy of telling her it’s not her - making her wonder is mean.
 

FlexpertHamilton

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I'm sorry to hear this @FlexpertHamilton .

I'm wondering though if you're actually depressed (first), and that's why you lack the desire for sex?

And having sex exacerbates the depression?

Depression can do that, it kinda numbs you. Speaking from experience.

Have you seen or talked to a doctor about it?
Thank you, but yes I am depressed, this is nothing new to me. However I have found my libido lacking sometimes even when i'm not depressed. This has caused a strain for some relationships i've been in, especially in the past couple of years. In my very limited experience of broaching this subject, women never seem to believe me, they think it means i don't like them.

I've seen many doctors and therapists i don't think they're of any help. I need to sort it out myself like always.
If she’s not deeply emotionally invested you, she’s going to leave you if you stop banging her and she may develop a bit of a complex if you don’t explain to her that you’re going through something. Do her the courtesy of telling her it’s not her - making her wonder is mean.
I did tell her that I'm in a rough patch just so she is aware of why im withdrawing. I wouldn't be vague about it.

did you figure out the low libido already or still hunting for the reason?
Lots of reasons, but ultimately low dopamine - its not health or hormonal issues. But i think my baseline libido is naturally low regardless, it always has been. I usually have to avoid busting for 2-3 weeks before I even have an urge to fvck, even when i'm otherwise feeling normal.
 
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plumber

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Lots of reasons, but ultimately low dopamine - its not health or hormonal issues. But i think my baseline libido is naturally low regardless, it always has been. I usually have to avoid busting for 2-3 weeks before I even have an urge to fvck, even when i'm otherwise feeling normal.
ok. there are lots of hormonal things beyond just T and Free T that absolutely can cause like that. Chatgpt will tell most of them, and even help with analyzing blood numbers. there are some med solutions for libido that can help. as you know dht is a big deal for this.
 

Travel memoir21

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Do you meditate? Pray? Read the scriptures? Hows your spiritual life?

Do you lift weights and go to the gym? Go jogging and sprinting? Do you eat healthy?

Theres a lot of things to keep in mind regarding this
 
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