Have some fun with your BPD ex

[Sigmund Freud]

Most of these guys don't know what BPD is. They read info off the internet and assume she has BPD. BPD is an extreme case Personality Disorder. I doubt that most of the men on here who say they had a BPD even had one. Most likely it was BI Polar which is more common and confused for BPD.

Bi polar disorder is a disorder as well, therefore anyone who is incapable of diagnosing bpd would be incapable of diagnosis bi polar disorder. In fact in some cases bi polar disorder is far more severe than borderline personality disorder. On top of that you can have varying degrees of a disorder, one can have mild bdp tendencies and still be diagnosed.

 

[abe0]

Well, I was married 25 years to a bipolar with a touch of borderline. I am a physician and though I am not a psychiatrist I know and have talked to almost every psychiatrist in my community. There are no approved medications for borderline....you can give medications for other problems that they have like depression, or anxiety since most borderline have other psychiatric problems. You treat them with psychotherapy including cognitive behavior therapy, dialectical behavior therapy, and/or schema focus therapy. The problem is that most of these people have no insight (they do not know they have a problem to begin with ), and it requires long term treatment with someone who has insight and is willing to change. This means a very low "cure" rate ...which is really just improvement rate and a high failure rate because of money,and time constraints as well as uncooperative patients. It is not like depression or bipolar or anxiety that with good medications there is often quick improvements.
So, do not toy with these people...they are ill....most do not know or can not even admit or unable to realize they have a problem. It is not as simple as all they need to do is get some treatment but they choose not to do it.
It is a devastating disease and I do not wish it on anybody nor wish anybody to end up with a partner who has it. This disease and in combination to bipolar cost me one million dollars in attorneys fees, the loss of my wife, destruction of the beautiful family I had...The ripple affects is beyond belief .... Abe

 

[Pasternak]

Most of these guys don't know what BPD is. They read info off the internet and assume she has BPD. BPD is an extreme case Personality Disorder. I doubt that most of the men on here who say they had a BPD even had one. Most likely it was BI Polar which is more common and confused for BPD.

Actually, Personality Disorders are present in up to 10-16 percent of the general population with Cluster B accounting for nearly 9 percent. It's not that rare and most of the time comorbid with other illnesses. Despite this, there is lot of appearent misdiagnoses here on sosuave, mostly from younger members.

 

[Pasternak]

Bi polar disorder is a disorder as well, therefore anyone who is incapable of diagnosing bpd would be incapable of diagnosis bi polar disorder. In fact in some cases bi polar disorder is far more severe than borderline personality disorder. On top of that you can have varying degrees of a disorder, one can have mild bdp tendencies and still be diagnosed.

Bipolars can be medicated which will prevent them from going dysregulated, with PDs, there is no option like this. With Bipolars the problem is, they just discontinue to take the pills after a while, consider themselves cured or simply missing the high coming with the maniac episodes.

 

[Pasternak]

Well, I was married 25 years to a bipolar with a touch of borderline. I am a physician and though I am not a psychiatrist I know and have talked to almost every psychiatrist in my community. There are no approved medications for borderline....you can give medications for other problems that they have like depression, or anxiety since most borderline have other psychiatric problems. You treat them with psychotherapy including cognitive behavior therapy, dialectical behavior therapy, and/or schema focus therapy. The problem is that most of these people have no insight (they do not know they have a problem to begin with ), and it requires long term treatment with someone who has insight and is willing to change. This means a very low "cure" rate ...which is really just improvement rate and a high failure rate because of money,and time constraints as well as uncooperative patients. It is not like depression or bipolar or anxiety that with good medications there is often quick improvements.
So, do not toy with these people...they are ill....most do not know or can not even admit or unable to realize they have a problem. It is not as simple as all they need to do is get some treatment but they choose not to do it.
It is a devastating disease and I do not wish it on anybody nor wish anybody to end up with a partner who has it. This disease and in combination to bipolar cost me one million dollars in attorneys fees, the loss of my wife, destruction of the beautiful family I had...The ripple affects is beyond belief .... Abe

They obviously got confused because of the disorder part. The old terminology was much more clear on this. It's a personality-type/character flaw.

What would make them change when there is unlimited source of narcisstic supply? White knights lining up for save them and they honestly see themselves as victims.

 

[slikkmeister]

She's been diagnosed... She's authentic BPD, medicated for her anxiety and depression... She refuses to go to the therapy because "someone might see me, ewwwww". She also refuses to take her medication when she's planning on drinking because then she would get sleepy and wouldn't be able to soak up all the attention at the bar... Even though she knows that going on/off her meds is extremely bad for her!
I have no pity for people who have enough, although limited intelligence, that make decisions based on superficial and greedy desires!!! I actually have nothing but scorn for her and those types.
I had an opportunity to exact a small amount of vengeance from this dirty POS so I took it.

I'm a jerk! I'm proud of it and I can careless what you guys think...I'll settle up with the big guy upstairs when it's my time.........

 

[YawataNoKami]

IMO bpd is a common diagnosis but this label too seems to medicalise bad behavior and allows people to get away with anything when they really just need a kick in the pants.

 

[lanba]

This is like fúcking with schizophrenic people. They are mentally ill. Just stay away from them if you don't want to get hurt, or else be strong enough to control them without being abusive. Messing with people who have mental health issues out of some misguided sense of revenge is downright psychopathic.

I'm still waiting for someone on this board to explain to me why almost every poster complains of BPD as if 60% of women have it when the number is closer to 2%. Someone above reckons 16% but whatever, it's simply not plausible that most of the problems posted on this board are caused by BPD and if you know so much about it, why did you get involved in the first place? Stupid. I guess I will never get an explanation.

 

[Demonicale]

Have you been with a BPD??? EVER?

Take your platitudes and holier than thous and cram them somewhere tight. If you don't have the perspective then your opinion is pretty worthless on this... I know Vlad has this knowledge...

Go out with one. I encourage you... You'll at least consider this stuff... if you don't wind up dead.

So what your say Johnny, is that you went out with one and it wasn't a nice experience, so now you encourage everyone else to treat them like ****?

A REAL MAN, would just move on and not even bother with those types of women. Why mess around with these types of women guys if you don't like them?

To me, if your purposely going out of your way to **** with them, then i think those are the guys who need to get theirs heads right and grow up. We're suppose to be MEN, and men don't act like little *****es when they're upset.

 

[abe0]

I'm still waiting for someone on this board to explain to me why almost every poster complains of BPD as if 60% of women have it when the number is closer to 2%. Someone above reckons 16% but whatever, it's simply not plausible that most of the problems posted on this board are caused by BPD and if you know so much about it, why did you get involved in the first place? Stupid. I guess I will never get an explanation.

When I hear people here talk about BPD....I think of people referring to women with elements and behavior of BPD, rather than true BPD. In other words, they are behaving with some borderline like traits.....but probably are not true BPD since most people who talk about these women are not psychiatrist and just see these crazy behaviors we do not like.
I wish we could come up on this site a term BPT ( Borderline Personality Traits ) to label crazy women who behave as if they had BPD.....and use the term BPD for those women who have been truly diagnosed as having Borderline Personality Disorder by a professional. In fact, NAMI (National Alliance on Mental Illness ) uses the term Borderline Personality Traits for people who do not meet the criteria of BPD under DSM4 but who have features of BPD. Or maybe we should forget all this BPD stuff and call them CB for Crazy B*tches . Abe

 

[Jariel]

What I'm reading from this thread...

You got hurt, you're still bitter, you want revenge and you can't move on with your life.

Deny it as much as you will, if you were truly happy and confident with yourself, you would be focused on living your own life and seeking out new and exciting experiences.

Whether they're BPD or just plain manipulative b1tches, you have to hold yourself accountable for getting emotionally invested in them, ignoring the red flags and allowing them to walk over you. We've all done it at some point, but you need to learn from this experience, note the warning signs and use this lesson to move forward with your life.

 

[Pasternak]

When I hear people here talk about BPD....I think of people referring to women with elements and behavior of BPD, rather than true BPD. In other words, they are behaving with some borderline like traits.....but probably are not true BPD since most people who talk about these women are not psychiatrist and just see these crazy behaviors we do not like.
I wish we could come up on this site a term BPT ( Borderline Personality Traits ) to label crazy women who behave as if they had BPD.....and use the term BPD for those women who have been truly diagnosed as having Borderline Personality Disorder by a professional. In fact, NAMI (National Alliance on Mental Illness ) uses the term Borderline Personality Traits for people who do not meet the criteria of BPD under DSM4 but who have features of BPD. Or maybe we should forget all this BPD stuff and call them CB for Crazy B*tches . Abe

HPD/BPD/NPD/AsPD all exist on the same Cluster B spectrum, lot of similarities and often comorbid with each other. Just imagine, 9 percent in the general population, high promiscuity, which is a core trait and the life wrecking experience they can cause, no surpise why we have those threads.

Someone above reckons 16%

To clarifiy, 16% for all the 10 PDs, Cluster A, B and C. Those are in the A and C are most often harmless if not comorbid(Paranoid, Schizoid, Schizotypal, Avoidant, Dependent, Obsessive-compulsive).

 

[Pasternak]

Just one example of craziness: my BPD ex is considering to have sex with her ex husband for money on regular bases. She is disgusted by him, cheated on him for 7 years and still would give in. I'm shocked. Found out about the porn audition after we broke up.

 

[Die Hard]

Here's an idea: Everytime a thread mentions BPD, let's get into this same old discussion time after time again. No matter if the whole argument has been done to death in hundreds of older threads, no matter if all the thoughts that are currently being expressed have already been expressed a thousand times before, let's just keep doing it again, till the end of time, because....I dunno....because we're all fukkin stupid, I guess?

And while we're at it, let's keep doing the looks vs. status debate over and over again too, lol. Who cares if it has been sufficiently done before, we're all fukking ignorant morons so we need to keep doing it, right?

:shakes head:

 

[j.619]

Here's an idea: Everytime a thread mentions BPD, let's get into this same old discussion time after time again. No matter if the whole argument has been done to death in hundreds of older threads, no matter if all the thoughts that are currently being expressed have already been expressed a thousand times before, let's just keep doing it again, till the end of time, because....I dunno....because we're all fukkin stupid, I guess?

And while we're at it, let's keep doing the looks vs. status debate over and over again too, lol. Who cares if it has been sufficiently done before, we're all fukking ignorant morons so we need to keep doing it, right?

:shakes head:

I'm appreciating this thread. Lots of good info:rockon:

 

[goldengoose]

Actually, Personality Disorders are present in up to 10-16 percent of the general population with Cluster B accounting for nearly 9 percent. It's not that rare and most of the time comorbid with other illnesses. Despite this, there is lot of appearent misdiagnoses here on sosuave, mostly from younger members.

Which is what I said "misdiagnoses". It is rare enough that most of the population doesn't have it, but people on here claim BPD so they can blame the girl instead. You're crazy. Cluster B is the most rare cases. That means a woman has more than one disorder. Very rare to have that. 9% is laughable. That is more rare than finding a BPD. You are inflating your numbers.

Bi polar disorder is a disorder as well, therefore anyone who is incapable of diagnosing bpd would be incapable of diagnosis bi polar disorder. In fact in some cases bi polar disorder is far more severe than borderline personality disorder. On top of that you can have varying degrees of a disorder, one can have mild bdp tendencies and still be diagnosed.

No sh1t it is a disorder. That is not true because Bi Polar is easier to identify. Bi Polar is not more severe than BPD. BPD is far more extreme which affects a smaller portion of he population. No, you can't diagnose mild BPD tendecies because it is mistaken for Bi Polar. Some of these guy trying to give advice have no clue what they are talking about.

 

[Pasternak]

You're crazy. Cluster B is the most rare cases. That means a woman has more than one disorder. Very rare to have that. 9% is laughable. That is more rare than finding a BPD. You are inflating your numbers.

You have absolutely no idea what you're talking about. Cluster B just a group of disorders defined by common patterns.

http://www.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/pmc/articles/PMC3105841/

To our knowledge, the overall prevalence of personality disorders in this Time-1/Time-2 sample was never reported, but the prevalence of the seven first-wave Axis II disorders was collectively reported at 14.8 percent.

http://psychnews.psychiatryonline.org/newsarticle.aspx?articleid=111980

 

[goldengoose]

You have absolutely no idea what you're talking about. Cluster B just a group of disorders defined by common patterns.

http://www.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/pmc/articles/PMC3105841/

Actually I do. Yeah it's patterns which include these.

Antisocial personality disorder: a pervasive pattern of disregard for and violation of the rights of others, lack of empathy

Borderline personality disorder: pervasive pattern of instability in relationships, self-image, identity, behavior and affects often leading to self-harm and impulsivity

Histrionic personality disorder: pervasive pattern of attention-seeking behavior and excessive emotions

Narcissistic personality disorder: a pervasive pattern of grandiosity, need for admiration, and a lack of empathy

A Cluster B can have all these traits which is more than one disorder just like I said.

 

[Sigmund Freud]

Actually I do. Yeah it's patterns which include these.

Antisocial personality disorder: a pervasive pattern of disregard for and violation of the rights of others, lack of empathy

Borderline personality disorder: pervasive pattern of instability in relationships, self-image, identity, behavior and affects often leading to self-harm and impulsivity

Histrionic personality disorder: pervasive pattern of attention-seeking behavior and excessive emotions

Narcissistic personality disorder: a pervasive pattern of grandiosity, need for admiration, and a lack of empathy

A Cluster B can have all these traits which is more than one disorder just like I said.

Good job. You can use google.

 

[Pasternak]

A Cluster B can have all these traits which is more than one disorder just like I said.

A Cluster B can be one of the four PDs you mentioned ALONE or in combination with another one. BPD females shows 42 percent comorbity for another Cluster B disorder, mostly narcisstic. It really doesn't matter because the core issues are exactley the same: stunted emotional growth on a level somewhere between a 3-6 years old child. Most often result of an abusive mother. All negative traits stem from this. A 3 years old child doesn't have adult like empathy, her love is absolutely need-based with no ability to delayed gratification. Lack of empathy will make them remorseless. No sense of self and undeveloped object consitancy. Mine was battleing with that to degree where she found hard to keep a healthy relationship with her own daughter because dad's got custody and only spent 3 days with her in a week. Out of sight, out of mind.