Harsh Truth: Women pursue the men that they want

[CornbreadFed]

If you find yourself expending finite energy and resources solely to create attraction with a woman, then you are a fool! In many cases, women signal their interest and actively pursue the men they desire. Reflect on your own experiences: the most successful relationships or encounters you've had likely involved women who made it effortless for connections to flourish. If the girl is giving you mixed signals, drop her immediately because she is likely not exhibiting the same behavior towards another guy.

The romanticized notion of tirelessly pursuing the girl of your dreams, as portrayed in Hollywood and popular culture, often falls short of reality. Instead, men would benefit from prioritizing maintaining attraction.

 

[LTG71]

What you chase will often run away. Needs to be a mutual attraction or you are wasting your time. Observe with eyes wide open and don’t waste your energy trying to convince her to like you. If she is full of excuses or makes it difficult them move on

 

[Hamurabimbi]

Mostly true. But. You leave out timing. Mixed signals can indicate she has some interest but other things interfere. A girl I thought was merely an acquaintance one day gave me a hug and whispered in my ear; ‘I don’t have a boyfriend anymore.’. Another case: I asked a coworker out. She gave me a soft rejection. 3 months later I asked her out again. She said ‘yes.’

 

[CornbreadFed]

Mostly true. But. You leave out timing. Mixed signals can indicate she has some interest but other things interfere. A girl I thought was merely an acquaintance one day gave me a hug and whispered in my ear; ‘I don’t have a boyfriend anymore.’. Another case: I asked a coworker out. She gave me a soft rejection. 3 months later I asked her out again. She said ‘yes.’

You are absolutely correct because timing is extremely important. At the very least, you will get a scentful indicator of interest and she will be back for you as soon as she is ready.

 

[Millard Fillmore]

Yes and no

 

[Mertz09]

Mostly true. But. You leave out timing. Mixed signals can indicate she has some interest but other things interfere. A girl I thought was merely an acquaintance one day gave me a hug and whispered in my ear; ‘I don’t have a boyfriend anymore.’. Another case: I asked a coworker out. She gave me a soft rejection. 3 months later I asked her out again. She said ‘yes.’

timing is everything!!

 

[manfrombelow]

When a woman wants you, she'd crawl under 1000km of barbwire and navigate through a minefield bigger than the one in Avdiivka, Ukraine to be with you and svck your d!ck right at your front door.

Timing my fvcking azz. Only her actions in the moment matter. The rest is only dogsh!t.

 

[Solomon]

I think this is true for the most part, women in 2024 are very forward(some are even aggressive), if they like you they will make an effort to see you and more. If you're always trying to make plans with a woman and she flakes she ain't feeling you and is feeling another fella more

 

[Mertz09]

When a woman wants you, she'd crawl under 1000km of barbwire and navigate through a minefield bigger than the one in Avdiivka, Ukraine to be with you and svck your d!ck right at your front door.

Timing my fvcking azz. Only her actions in the moment matter. The rest is onl y dogsh!t.

This is usually true. I think you misunderstood, As mentioned by Hamurabimbi ; if the woman is in a relationship and you are on her radar, then it could take a better "time" when she can act on her desire that she has for you. Years of experience go a long way when dealing with women.

 

[kleathe1]

John Gottman, PHD mentions this in his book "The Man's Guide to Women". This is surely not new on this forum, but he spent years studying relationships and points out that women pick the men they want and start sending out the nonverbal cues. This isn't to say it's all predetermined and I believe that is the whole point of being a DJ. She will notice it and send her cues to you if you have the mindset and present yourself accordingly. But, to your point...if she's not interested...well...she's not interested.

 

[devilkingx2]

Paradoxically I would say that it's true that women who like you will make it as easy as possible while also saying that you still have to pursue women.

You still have to pursue women because you can't always tell who likes you and who doesn't unless you're making moves.

Not to mention that there are certain steps all women will expect the men to take first (approaching, asking her out, etc.)

On the flip side, 9 times out of 10 if she actually likes you it'll feel like you're doing a fraction of the work for 10x the reward.

 

[BeExcellent]

Advice from the old lady:

She may not "chase" you, but what she will do is make it easy for you. She will say yes when you ask her out, she will demonstrate interest & investment, she will be fun to be around. That isn't chasing but it is still (+) responsiveness.

That is how the higher quality gals do things. Respond and be receptive & positive & willing to commit time & effort (and yes perhaps some money too).

I looked for a man who I found attractive who was willing to invest in me. And I matched his investment level (time/effort/energy) and I was patient as things developed. As a way of being that methodology has never failed me.

Men like it to be HIS idea to be in a relationship; Women like it to be HER idea to have sex in the mix.

If both people are interested and investing then things develop naturally and organically and it establishes a good foundation for the interaction.

But dont expect her to behave like a man. Thats not her role; and if she is direct and takes all the initiative? You are going to dislike the interaction over time because you're either dealing with a boss bytch ball buster masculine girl or she is very needy & insecure, both are bad news.

You want responsiveness, investment and a girl who makes your anatomy hard, not your life.

You still need to be the man in the interaction. Feminine women will expect that much of you. She must have something to respond to.....

 

[Mertz09]

Gentlemen: When we get "Advice from the old lady" we should All listen.

 

[Dr.Suave]

Gentlemen: When we get "Advice from the old lady" we should All listen.

You remind me of a younger Dr.Suave. Women are "guests" here and should be treated as such. The old lady has been around here longer than me and she might suprise you every now and then but you are most welcome to put her in "Ignore", she wont mind.

 

[Hamurabimbi]

If you find yourself expending finite energy and resources solely to create attraction with a woman, then you are a fool! In many cases, women signal their interest and actively pursue the men they desire. Reflect on your own experiences: the most successful relationships or encounters you've had likely involved women who made it effortless for connections to flourish. If the girl is giving you mixed signals, drop her immediately because she is likely not exhibiting the same behavior towards another guy.

The romanticized notion of tirelessly pursuing the girl of your dreams, as portrayed in Hollywood and popular culture, often falls short of reality. Instead, men would benefit from prioritizing maintaining attraction.

My dude, Assanova, said this years ago. Still true today.

 

[Mertz09]

You remind me of a younger Dr.Suave. Women are "guests" here and should be treated as such. The old lady has been around here longer than me and she might suprise you every now and then but you are most welcome to put her in "Ignore", she wont mind.

I respectfully disagree. She is Spot on this topic. And I respect her for trying inform us Men in the many ways of Women.

 

[Dr.Suave]

I respectfully disagree. She is Spot on this topic. And I respect her for trying inform us Men in the many ways of Women.

My bad, Bro. Thought you were trying to get under her skin or something

 

[parabellum]

This post is cool but women don’t purse the “man” they want. They purse the GOAL they want. Women could care less about the man. The same woman that’ll let Bill Gates smash; would also let Cristiano Ronaldo smash.

It’s whatever benefits her to obtain her goal.

I think the first half is true, and it pays to always remember it. One should always be pursuing ones own goals too. With the occasional, temporal goal convergence.

 

[BeExcellent]

Honestly @Deadshot its on you to screen out the chicks who want you strictly for their goals or purposes. Those are users and users are not in your best interest because, well, they dont care about you.

There are good women who don't use others.

Some women certainly are users. Some are crazy. Hell, some are users AND crazy!! Um. Screen those chicks out, even if they are hot. Your future sanity will thank you later.

Few things are more flattering than a hot crazy love bombing BPD chick (for example.) Um. Thats NOT normal or healthy or well adjusted behavior. Search the BPD threads on this website & youll find carcasses of players and guys driven here by the hot crazy love bombers out there. And you'll see examples of just how sideways things can go.

 

[Black Widow Void]

You want ... a girl who makes your anatomy hard, not your life.