Handling Confrontation in Public

[WORKEROUTER]

How do you deal with guys who make comments or try to start confrontation when you're with your girl in public?

I've known all types of guys who handle the situations differently. Some will just go up and knock the guy down and others will just ignore it (if let's say it's just a comment.)

But let's say you're walking down the street with your date/gf/etc and some guy touches her or makes some very inappropriate comment. What's the best way to handle this?

 

[stuka1939]

How do you deal with guys who make comments or try to start confrontation when you're with your girl in public?

I've known all types of guys who handle the situations differently. Some will just go up and knock the guy down and others will just ignore it (if let's say it's just a comment.)

But let's say you're walking down the street with your date/gf/etc and some guy touches her or makes some very inappropriate comment. What's the best way to handle this?

How old are you? This really pisses me off that people do this.

I think you just have to ignore it, unless they touch her.

 

[WORKEROUTER]

I'm 20. It may piss you off, but it happens a lot in scenes especially when they involve alcohol.

Yeah I agree with ignoring it unless it is extremely offensive.

 

[Kev07]

a guy i knew:

some dude grabbed his gf's ass, he walked up to the guy really calmly and told the guy "you better apologize for touching her ass"

dude said something like "hahah it's naw naw it wasn't much"

guy i knew left, found the dude 2 days later, and sliced up his arms with a machete, obviously, the guy is in jail now.

 

[Obsidian]

rofl @ Kev

Being a believer in free speech, I generally don't result to assault/battery merely because someone insults me or my friends. Call me a wimp if you want, but I think it's kind of stupid that someone else should be able to compel me into a fight (and probably jail afterward) by merely acting obnoxious toward me.

 

[Levex]

This guy's got the right idea:

http://youtube.com/watch?v=Fn8PP4fw-uU

That goes for ANY touching.

If it's just words, try to ignore it.

 

[wolf116]

This guy's got the right idea:

http://youtube.com/watch?v=Fn8PP4fw-uU

That goes for ANY touching.

If it's just words, try to ignore it.

That made my heart start pumping adrenalin.
I love it when that happens.

 

[bigjohnson]

Unwanted touching *IS* assault. Anything less than that is ignorable. Ignore and move on.

 

[dietzcoi]

Still, it is hard to ignore purposeful disrespect. I have been in a few fights because of it, and always questioned my actions afterwards.

What do you do if some jackass really just walks up to you and verbally assaults you?

I'd like some good answers on this from real life, not from internet staged fights.

Dietzcoi

 

[stuka1939]

Still, it is hard to ignore purposeful disrespect. I have been in a few fights because of it, and always questioned my actions afterwards.

What do you do if some jackass really just walks up to you and verbally assaults you?

I'd like some good answers on this from real life, not from internet staged fights.

Dietzcoi

Was this when you were an attractive chick?

 

[bigjohnson]

....try to ignore the comment, and have a laugh about it with your GF, you can almost always make a witty comment about it that will make her giggle or hit you playfully. Plus the guy would be pissed to see the girl laughing about him. Still...

Yep. Words are easy to shrug off, and if someone pushes it too far then there is justification for more forceful action, but that has to be pretty extreme.

 

[HandyAndy]

This guy's got the right idea:

http://youtube.com/watch?v=Fn8PP4fw-uU

That goes for ANY touching.

If it's just words, try to ignore it.

Did the guy accidentally slap her? He got fvcking dominated. :rockon:

 

[thehexman]

This is why I am going to look into martial arts classes for self-defense. Words are ignorable. If someone touches your girlfriend, just ask for an apology. It will probably be refused. Then say: "See, that's the difference between me and you. You have no self-esteem and inferiority complexes that make you a loser, and that's why you have to grab a girl's ass to get tail. You can't even admit a mistake. Me, I'm just a straight up man and don't need your methods."

I actually did this once when going out with one of my female friends. It worked, but prepare for assault.

 

[bigjohnson]

"You realize that you just commited the crime of assault, right?"

Tends to put them in the appropriate light every time.

 

[Nip/Tuck]

- Verbal assault to me. I would usually ignore since most of them are retarded and they expect you to react.

- Verbal assault to me in front of girl. I laugh my ass off, make it look like a guy is a complete tool for saying something retarded. I dunno where I learned it, get a quarter out and flick it then say "fetch." Usually leads to...

- Physical assault to me. I'll kick his ass, self-defense and defending my dignity calls for physical confrontation. Sometimes douche bags need to be put in their place.

- Physical assault to my friend or girl. I'll warn him and then make him apologize. If he continues or is really trying to hurt them, I will send him to the hospital. :trouble:

http://youtube.com/watch?v=D3K-mrlYG7Y

That said going out and instigating a fight is retarded and you deserve to get your ass kicked. Starting fights accomplishes nothing.

 

[bigjohnson]

I agree with that last. I'm not aware of the legal definition of 'verbal assault', however. Any unwanted touching is criminal behavior under assault laws and should be treated as such. I won't fight, ever. Fighting is for children. If it comes down to it I am ready to kill in self defense but that would be a horrible chioce to have to make.

It's best to defuse and exit.

 

[Interceptor]

I just wanted to add that I LOVE that video of that guy waxing those punks after slapping his girl.


Just remember, guys, you do NOT pphysically escalate on words.
Physical escalation only in return for physical assault.

I also want to add that it IS possible (not liely, but what if one of thos dorks actually gets braindamage or dies or something, what kind of position woudl you be oputting the cop in even if he DID agree with you for busting up thos guys?) for a cop (in the USA) to actually charge the guy who punched out those dorks with assault too. He can't necessarily claim Self Defense. He wasn't defending himself.
Just something to think about.

 

[bigjohnson]

Self defense is only a valid defense (according to my instructors) in case of reasonable, real and immediate fear of life or limb. If you or more to the point, a hypothetical reasonable person, are not in such fear then criminal charges apply

The rule of thumb is to plan on any defensive killing or serious injury to cost you a minimum of $50K to defend plus whatever weight your conscience has to carry from then on.

 

[Obsidian]

regarding that video...

charge the guy who punched out those dorks with assault too. He can't necessarily claim Self Defense. He wasn't defending himself.
Just something to think about.

Quite right. Technically, the winner in that video could be locked up for battery (or sued, or both). The reason is not because they hit his girl instead of him, though. You can defend third parties (at least in my state) the same way you can defend yourself. The reason is because he wasn't defending anyone.

Kicking the crap out of someone just because they put their hand in front of your girlfriend when she's walking and lightly slap her is excessive escalation. Similarly, if someone comes at you and tries to wrestle you and you pull out a knife and stab his heart, that would probably be an excessive escalation. (I've heard that it's almost impossible to use a knife defensively.) The force that you use should be proportionate to the force used against you.

Moreover, defense of self or defense of third parties means DEFENDING, not retaliating. You're only supposed to do it when you're in danger of some kind. Once the offender relents (and you're reasonably convinced that he's no longer a threat), you're not allowed to keep pummelling him, even if he started it. You're supposed to let the courts punish him.

Of course, it's still possible that a jury would be sympathetic and acquit the guy in the video regardless, but his actions really seem like an overreaction to me. As an aspiring DJ, I think it's sickening that some guys are so enslaved to their women that they put themselves in physical and legal trouble just to make themselves look macho in front of some stupid chick.

All he did was touch her. Let it go.

 

[Mr.Positive]

Quite right. Technically, the winner in that video could be locked up for battery (or sued, or both). The reason is not because they hit his girl instead of him, though.

Having a rather short-lived background in law, you are technically correct...however, remember that women, in the eyes of the court, are 'victims' from the get-go. So, he was protecting a victim from harm, and a loved one, on top of that. The intent of the aggressors was unknown at the time, and that can be articulated.

The courts would side with the winner, IMO. But, would the legal counsel, court time, etc. be worth it. Well, that's open for discussion. I'm from an old school thought, that you protect the people you are with..their livelihood comes first.

That being said, fighting on the street is a last resort. Only fight, when you have nothing to lose. People break bones, lose eyes, get brain damage, shot, stabbed, etc.. in street fights. Street fights are really an all or nothing thing. Either you are all in, or find a way out of it.

If you can't get out of it, or you, or a loved one is in immediate life danger..unleash hell.