manfrombelow
Master Don Juan
- Joined
- Feb 28, 2021
- Messages
- 1,738
- Reaction score
- 2,228
- Age
- 35
Context:
1. Last Friday, I forgot a date that I kind of discussed with this chick (not fixed yet, we were talking on the phone, and just discussing that we gonna meet this Friday), so the next day (Saturday), she got mad, started to complain how I didn't miss her and never initiated text.
2. In her text, she said something along the line of how I "fvcking forgot the date" (English is not our mother tongue, but my translation conveys almost 99% the tone and the language choice in this context).
3. I said sorry for forgetting the date, and she continued saying that she's "very mad at me" (her words), to which I said sth along the line of:
"Alright, I already apologized for the forgotten date. I'm not a fan of texting, but I'm willing to improve this. When you're done being mad at me, and want to meet me, let me know. See you!"
4. So, this morning, after re-reading some topics on SS about how we as men should discipline and put our women to their places, I initiated a this text on this domestic texting app, since I'm not from the West, which we always used to chat:
"It's not right to use swearwords in texting like you did. It's disrespectful. You're free to communicate your needs, wants, and emotions to me in a mature and direct way, don't need to get aggressive."
5. Now is where things got interesting: She had blocked me. (Mind you, this chick always told me how she has the habit of "blocking" her younger sister (let's call this A), and another best friend (let's call this B) whenver she's "mad" at them.)
6. Wow, so I guess this is her pattern/way of behaving whenever she's "mad" at somebody.
7. So, I went to WhatsApp (another app we seldome used), on which she didn't block me, and send her sth along the line of:
"Hey, in case you forgot, I'm not A or B, so you should not block me just because you're mad, especially since I already said I'm sorry (and I meant it). That's toxic, full of drama, and immature behavior. And I won't tolerate that kind of behavior in this relationship, with you or anyone else. Don't ever pull this sh!t on me again!."
8. I knew she saw the message, no reponses. I went back to the other app and check: She has unblocked me, still without any responses.
9. After almost a whole day, she sent me this, which I interpreted as a "half-azz" apology (the translation conveyed almost 99% the tone and language choice):
"I don't know what else to say, but I want to apologize to you first because you might feel disrespected (although I didn't mean it that way, depending on how you perceive it). I don't intend to say anything else because I'm under quite a bit of pressure, my mental health is not okay, but I will temporarily handle what I can.
I've been giving myself the silent treatment to regulate my emotions, maybe I'm burning out so everything seems more serious. But I don't like the way you "correct" me as if teaching me instead of understanding my behavior. I've emphasized many times that I never mean any harm in my words, and I'm also adjusting (I'm also educated), but not to the extent that I need you to provide a template for me to behave according to your standards.
(=> This girl is not used to having a true strong father figure to teach her things. She's from a matriarchy family where her mother dictated everything in the house. She told me this. Girls without a strong father figure somehow hates it when being corrected and put into place by men in general.)
I think you should limit talking to me, I think you’re right when not texting me, and keep acting like that from now on.
I've just recovered from a few breakdowns, and honestly, since meeting you until now, I've never been emotionally stable because it's just the beginning stages of psychological recovery. That's why I couldn't control myself over such trivial things.
So, in summary, right now I need time to return to a stable state, because it's been really difficult for me to get to this current state, I don't want to endure any more bouts of depression.
Anyway, I apologize for anything that has not been satisfactory to you up to the present moment."
10. So my questions are:
- Was this really a half-azz apology, or am I being too fvcking stiff? I really didn't feel like I was actually apologized to reading her text.
- What should I do now? Deploy Silence & Distance? I haven't replied her since.
Big thanks, fellas!
1. Last Friday, I forgot a date that I kind of discussed with this chick (not fixed yet, we were talking on the phone, and just discussing that we gonna meet this Friday), so the next day (Saturday), she got mad, started to complain how I didn't miss her and never initiated text.
2. In her text, she said something along the line of how I "fvcking forgot the date" (English is not our mother tongue, but my translation conveys almost 99% the tone and the language choice in this context).
3. I said sorry for forgetting the date, and she continued saying that she's "very mad at me" (her words), to which I said sth along the line of:
"Alright, I already apologized for the forgotten date. I'm not a fan of texting, but I'm willing to improve this. When you're done being mad at me, and want to meet me, let me know. See you!"
4. So, this morning, after re-reading some topics on SS about how we as men should discipline and put our women to their places, I initiated a this text on this domestic texting app, since I'm not from the West, which we always used to chat:
"It's not right to use swearwords in texting like you did. It's disrespectful. You're free to communicate your needs, wants, and emotions to me in a mature and direct way, don't need to get aggressive."
5. Now is where things got interesting: She had blocked me. (Mind you, this chick always told me how she has the habit of "blocking" her younger sister (let's call this A), and another best friend (let's call this B) whenver she's "mad" at them.)
6. Wow, so I guess this is her pattern/way of behaving whenever she's "mad" at somebody.
7. So, I went to WhatsApp (another app we seldome used), on which she didn't block me, and send her sth along the line of:
"Hey, in case you forgot, I'm not A or B, so you should not block me just because you're mad, especially since I already said I'm sorry (and I meant it). That's toxic, full of drama, and immature behavior. And I won't tolerate that kind of behavior in this relationship, with you or anyone else. Don't ever pull this sh!t on me again!."
8. I knew she saw the message, no reponses. I went back to the other app and check: She has unblocked me, still without any responses.
9. After almost a whole day, she sent me this, which I interpreted as a "half-azz" apology (the translation conveyed almost 99% the tone and language choice):
"I don't know what else to say, but I want to apologize to you first because you might feel disrespected (although I didn't mean it that way, depending on how you perceive it). I don't intend to say anything else because I'm under quite a bit of pressure, my mental health is not okay, but I will temporarily handle what I can.
I've been giving myself the silent treatment to regulate my emotions, maybe I'm burning out so everything seems more serious. But I don't like the way you "correct" me as if teaching me instead of understanding my behavior. I've emphasized many times that I never mean any harm in my words, and I'm also adjusting (I'm also educated), but not to the extent that I need you to provide a template for me to behave according to your standards.
(=> This girl is not used to having a true strong father figure to teach her things. She's from a matriarchy family where her mother dictated everything in the house. She told me this. Girls without a strong father figure somehow hates it when being corrected and put into place by men in general.)
I think you should limit talking to me, I think you’re right when not texting me, and keep acting like that from now on.
I've just recovered from a few breakdowns, and honestly, since meeting you until now, I've never been emotionally stable because it's just the beginning stages of psychological recovery. That's why I couldn't control myself over such trivial things.
So, in summary, right now I need time to return to a stable state, because it's been really difficult for me to get to this current state, I don't want to endure any more bouts of depression.
Anyway, I apologize for anything that has not been satisfactory to you up to the present moment."
10. So my questions are:
- Was this really a half-azz apology, or am I being too fvcking stiff? I really didn't feel like I was actually apologized to reading her text.
- What should I do now? Deploy Silence & Distance? I haven't replied her since.
Big thanks, fellas!
Last edited:
