good girls vs sluts

[flyinshark]

Definitions:

good girl (n) : A girl who won't sleep with the first come. No one night stands. LTR potential, and doesn't normally engage in sex unless the has feelings for the guy.

slutl (n) : The oposite of the good girl, regarding her opinion about sex. She will have sex relatively easily and feelings are often not involved.

Last year i was interested in a good girl. One day, i made the mistake of telling her that i have already had 2 one night stands in my life before. I was to find out later that this threw her off and killed my chances to be with her.

I tried explaining to her the difference between good girls and sluts. Sluts are looking for the same thing as guys that are players: sex without emotional involvement. So in my opinion, this makes it okay to have sex with a slut and not feel any guilt about it.
Then, having sex with a good girl is entirely different, because the good girl will wanna keep you in a relationship if she had sex with you. She gets emotionally involved and if u leave her soon after, it would hurt her.
I added that this doesn't make me a jerk. It just shows i am polyvalent, meaning that i adapt to the situation (girl) in front of me. I can be perfectly happy with a good girl and be loyal to her, yet when comes the time to bang a slut i can do it without looking back.

Question: Why was this good girl so turned off? Did she take it as if i was a jerk who sleeps with sluts and can't be trusted in a relationship?

 

[spider_007]

the line between the good gurl and a slut, is a blury one. whey are all emotional creatures. Whit the right guy even the good gurl will turn nasty. One of the big diferences is haw they ware raised and who their perents are.

In my opinion whey are all sluts, just on the different place on the scale.

As for your gurl; wouldn't you be litle turned off, if your gurl told you she had a few one nighters. you would be a litle disapointed wouldn't you. now imagine if you had really high moral standards. and you ware looking for the one that was gona rock your world (not just sexually)..... See where im coming from???

 

[pootwo]

The way i look at it is, I'm young, i've got a lust for life, i'm adventurous & i'm trying to experience as much as i can.

A LTR isn't what i'm looking for right now. I want someone with a little excitment & adventure about them. Which is actually much harder to find in a woman than you'd think.

I hate 'goody goodies'. The people who never take risks & are stuck in a bland existance.

If a girl has slept around, good for her. She shows she isn't afraid of her sexuality & isn't bothered about the social stigma that comes with it (ie. not caring what others think of her). In many ways, that shows a strong character.

Although, i would like the girl to have some intelligence & opinions, & a personality (which is also hard to find in a woman!).

Well, i know my views differ from a lot of people, but we're all different. I personally can't see what anyone could want in someone who has no individuality or personal opinions.

 

[spider_007]

I don't know why but for some reason it bothers me if I hear that a gurl has slept around, even tho I might not have any interast in her.

 

[tmpgstx]

a girl has slept around, good for her. She shows she isn't afraid of her sexuality & isn't bothered about the social stigma that comes with it (ie. not caring what others think of her). In many ways, that shows a strong character.

C'mon now .. good character? It's called insecurity, and taking un-necessary risks for STDs and being used.

Everyone has pretty much had one-nighters .. even those goodies. It's just whether they kept on and with who that makes the difference in terms of being a slut or gigalo or not.

Like with anything, just have to find a balance. The really religious types are restricting themselves un-necessarily from potentially good relationships while at the other extreme the hos don't know a good thing when it bites them square in the ass!

So, the decent girls that are stable an well-balanced recognize this, but they are indeed hard to find and most have bfs when you do find them!

 

[MetalFortress]

Originally posted by pootwo

If a girl has slept around, good for her. She shows she isn't afraid of her sexuality & isn't bothered about the social stigma that comes with it (ie. not caring what others think of her). In many ways, that shows a strong character.

HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAH

 

[DJDamage]

Every women is a slut because every woman is sexually active. I think there is a variation of the level of slutness. I know plenty of so called "good girls" who get dumped and end up sleeping with every guy that pays them attension, and I also know girls who have been sleeping with lots of men their whole life until they met an LTR material and then decided to quit and become a "good girl"

The world is full of hypocrisy and constant change so don't even try to go there.

P.S

and I agree with MetalFortress hahahahahaha

 

[naoi deag se deag]

Originally posted by flyinshark
I tried explaining to her the difference between good girls and sluts. Sluts are looking for the same thing as guys that are players: sex without emotional involvement. So in my opinion, this makes it okay to have sex with a slut and not feel any guilt about it.
Then, having sex with a good girl is entirely different, because the good girl will wanna keep you in a relationship if she had sex with you. She gets emotionally involved and if u leave her soon after, it would hurt her.
I added that this doesn't make me a jerk. It just shows i am polyvalent, meaning that i adapt to the situation (girl) in front of me. I can be perfectly happy with a good girl and be loyal to her, yet when comes the time to bang a slut i can do it without looking back.

Question: Why was this good girl so turned off? Did she take it as if i was a jerk who sleeps with sluts and can't be trusted in a relationship?

Because you tried to engage her in a logical conversation about this stuff. You will NEVER defeat her social conditioning and come out on the other side still holding her hand. It's the ultimate Pyrrhic victory. Just don't talk about it.

I don't believe in good girls. Have you ever taken some girls you go to school or work with out to a club and observed the MASSIVE change? It's amazing to watch them go ultrasexual. My brother seems to excel at getting with the "good girls" you talk about - the kind who have the same committed boyfriend for two years and would never kiss another guy while with him, who won't give anything up until the third date, &c - very quickly. He fits nicely in their "committed" relationship. There's a lot of stuff written about this, particularly in the TylerDurden archives at fastseduction.com. Go check that out.

 

[flyinshark]

Because you tried to engage her in a logical conversation about this stuff. You will NEVER defeat her social conditioning and come out on the other side still holding her hand. It's the ultimate Pyrrhic victory. Just don't talk about it.

Yeah, it's a big mistake to talk about this with a girl, and maybe an even bigger one to tell her that u've had one night stands before.

Have you ever taken some girls you go to school or work with out to a club and observed the MASSIVE change? It's amazing to watch them go ultrasexual.

Yes, you are very right, and I have observed this before with some of the girls i knew and thought they were good girls. Heck, even my "great" gf, which seemed like a good girl until a few days ago, acts like this when we go clubbing.

Good stuff to think about here....

 

[Kaine]

My definition of a good girl only extends to her attitude.

Does she sleep with a guy she wants to persue a relationship with or does she sleep with guys for the sexual experience.

All girls can get a little "freaky", which is fine and fun, but when she does one night stands just to get off or makes out with any guy that's available for sh.its and giggles then you know you have a sl.ut on your hands.


Kaine

 

[Wyldfire]

Well, seeing as I fit your definition of "good girl" I can answer from my point of view. Personally, I am turned off by guys who will sleep with anything that moves. If a man is not selective about who he is intimate with, well...he seems kinda "dirty" and "skanky" to me. If you think about it...when you have sex with someone, you are basically having sex with everyone they have had sex with and so on. The less picky a guy is about who he has sex with the more likely he has been exposed to STDs. Girls and women who are selective in who they have sex with are also typically careful about not exposing themselves to STDs.

 

[DrSoSuave]

I really hate it when guys like some of them in this thread try to stereotype and categorize women and men in several characters as one being evil and one being good.

Yes there are some downright cases of messed up women out there that are out to manipulate their way to the highest product just as there are plenty of cases of mysogynistic men who are out their to manipulate their way to as many women as possible.

Let's paint a little red into the black and white news?

 

[JonJack]

Most girls will get disappointed with a guy who's willing to do one night stands, pay for pros and most anything that has to do with fvcking without commitments. I believe that STDs has not much influence in this matter as it probably has been going around even before STDs became prevalent.

I've talked to a lot of my gal friends about this. It's weird that they actually understand that guys generally think with their dcks. I can actually see them crushed when they realize that most guys aren't really being honest with them. That they'll lie to you if you ask them loaded questions. And the reason that they'll lie is so that you don't strike them off of your 'I would fvck you' list. There isn't anything really bad about thinking with your dck. A guy still can practice some self control if he doesn't want to lose the girl.

A guy can be honest and tell a girl that he's done plenty of one night stands. A guy can be honest and tell a girl that depending on the situation, he would cheat on his girl. However, it does not mean that he will actually dump or cheat on his girl. That girl has to realize that it's better to hope that the guy won't cheat on her than to expect him not to. Once she starts expecting these sort of things from a guy, you can be sure that there will be trust issues in the future.

A guy can have many types of flaws. Thinking with his dck is the least of them. Acting on it is the killer.

 

[naoi deag se deag]

Originally posted by Wyldfire
Well, seeing as I fit your definition of "good girl" I can answer from my point of view. Personally, I am turned off by guys who will sleep with anything that moves. If a man is not selective about who he is intimate with, well...he seems kinda "dirty" and "skanky" to me. If you think about it...when you have sex with someone, you are basically having sex with everyone they have had sex with and so on. The less picky a guy is about who he has sex with the more likely he has been exposed to STDs. Girls and women who are selective in who they have sex with are also typically careful about not exposing themselves to STDs.

I think it's perfectly fine to be turned off by people who sleep around without any preconditions. I read some of my old friends' boasts about how many men they've pulled while studying abroad, for instance, with big time disgust. But I think that there's a serious problem with the dichotomy that most men make, because it's misleading. Many more women than most men think, particularly a lot of the "good girls" we know from school or work, will go out two nights a week and pull a man. So a man sees Alice the secretary at work and thinks she's a sweet girl that he'd love to introduce to his mum and Alice is planning on going out that night with her friends and getting laid by someone she doesn't even know but who meets her preconditions by being attractive, interesting and hitting all the right buttons. She's not a slut in the literal sense of the word because she's still choosing who to sleep with, but she ain't a good girl either. Shatter that dichotomy!

I'm not judging these girls and I think it's a huge mistake for anyone to do so. Don't be bitter about the reality of this. Just recognize that this is a hidden undercurrent for much of society and base your worldviews off that. Hell, when you're the guy getting pulled every night I bet you'll feel just fine

 

[Dominant]

Originally posted by flyinshark
Definitions:

good girl (n) : A girl who won't sleep with the first come. No one night stands. LTR potential, and doesn't normally engage in sex unless the has feelings for the guy.

slutl (n) : The oposite of the good girl, regarding her opinion about sex. She will have sex relatively easily and feelings are often not involved.

According to your definition, all girls are sluts. Any girl can have sex relatively easy without feelings involved.

All it takes is the right guy and the right game.

There is no such thing as a girl who won't have a ONS. Period.

 

[pootwo]

Re: Re: good girls vs sluts

Originally posted by Dominant
According to your definition, all girls are sluts. Any girl can have sex relatively easy without feelings involved.

All it takes is the right guy and the right game.

There is no such thing as a girl who won't have a ONS. Period.

Which is exactly my point. I got flamed for my post earlier about not having a problem with girls who enjoy sex.

ALL women like sex. I know some of you will find that hard to believe but it's true! Even the nice, innocent girls like sex.
There seems to be this social conditioning thats eaten away into everyones head that it is WRONG for women to have sex.

Theres a huge double standard going on here. The DJ philosophy has it that you should go out, get as many numbers as you can, go on dates, have as much sex as possible, etc.

If a girl does the same thing, you wont waste a second before comdeming her.

Now, the number of people a girl has had sex with.. you will have trouble finding a girl who isn't in double figures.. seriously.

Why is sex such a terrible thing? Don't throw the STD argument either. It's NOT that common. The media would have you believe tat everyone has a STD, but it's not true. & if you use protection then there's nothing to worry about. If you spend your life worring about the worst possible sernario you'll never do ANYTHING.

I know i'm going on abit, & i know most of you disagree. & i can't change your mind about it.. so.. this post was just a waste of time. But i hope i've given something to think about.

 

[Wyldfire]

Originally posted by naoi deag se deag
I think it's perfectly fine to be turned off by people who sleep around without any preconditions. I read some of my old friends' boasts about how many men they've pulled while studying abroad, for instance, with big time disgust. But I think that there's a serious problem with the dichotomy that most men make, because it's misleading. Many more women than most men think, particularly a lot of the "good girls" we know from school or work, will go out two nights a week and pull a man. So a man sees Alice the secretary at work and thinks she's a sweet girl that he'd love to introduce to his mum and Alice is planning on going out that night with her friends and getting laid by someone she doesn't even know but who meets her preconditions by being attractive, interesting and hitting all the right buttons. She's not a slut in the literal sense of the word because she's still choosing who to sleep with, but she ain't a good girl either. Shatter that dichotomy!

I'm not judging these girls and I think it's a huge mistake for anyone to do so. Don't be bitter about the reality of this. Just recognize that this is a hidden undercurrent for much of society and base your worldviews off that. Hell, when you're the guy getting pulled every night I bet you'll feel just fine

Well, I don't go to bars and act like a hooch, but I do know what you're saying. In fact, I have abstained for well over 4 years at this point because I haven't wanted to have a relationship over that time. I don't do the casual sex thing, either.

 

[Wyldfire]

Re: Re: good girls vs sluts

Originally posted by Dominant
According to your definition, all girls are sluts. Any girl can have sex relatively easy without feelings involved.

All it takes is the right guy and the right game.

There is no such thing as a girl who won't have a ONS. Period.

Yes there is. I've even had Speed Seduction used on me (before I knew what it was) by a guy who I was very attracted to and whose personality I liked. He used it well, too...but he still failed in his goal. He was the right guy (I liked him and was attracted to him and was single) and he didn't make a single mistake in his attempts...but I flat out don't do the casual sex thing.

 

[flyinshark]

Dominant:

According to your definition, all girls are sluts. Any girl can have sex relatively easy without feelings involved.

All it takes is the right guy and the right game.

There is no such thing as a girl who won't have a ONS. Period.

Yea, many girls would have sex if they meet the right guy at the right time. I know this girl that is veeery religious and clearly stated that she was waiting for marriage to do it, and one year later she met the "perfect guy" and they did it. All her friends, including me, were shocked.

YET, not all girls are sluts, come on!


pootwo:

ALL women like sex. I know some of you will find that hard to believe but it's true! Even the nice, innocent girls like sex.
There seems to be this social conditioning thats eaten away into everyones head that it is WRONG for women to have sex.

I agree with this. I think the vast majority of women like sex, and want sex. Some won't have as much sex as they'd like because of what society thinks about it. But more and more girls are getting out of their shells and are expressing their true thoughts about sex, and it's really quite amazing how horny they can sound sometimes. Hey, i am not complaining

 

[arq-dj1]

guys
it all comes down to self-control

example: one of this days i though about getting a prostitute... pay a lot of cash for a top one that i know...
i kept thinking about it for 3 hours, then, i didn't want anymore.. u see, i could control myself, and not doing it

for girls is the same... girls have a deeper problem to get RELAXED in a sexual state... guys can fuk whenever they want, anytime and even when they have serious problems going on.. women don't
they need to relax their minds, and have the proper opportunity at least... if they have both, they will have the lust of a man
a man don't need this preconditions
thats the only difference..

we don't like sluts bc we like the rare, we like the unique, we like the less touched.. would u like ur trophy(not that women are trophy), if everyone won one too? didn't think so