Girls are superficial, they care about a guy's personality, but this is no paradox

[Trader]

Girls care too much about a guy's personality, which is why girls are too superficial.

But how can girls be superficial when they care so much about a guy's personality?

The reason why is because in the initial stages of attraction, a girl judges your personality, NOT based off of your actions but rather, she judges your personality primarily based off of how you look.

Now there are so many threads arguing about *looks* in terms of aesthetics (is his facial structure physically beautiful?) It's not so much that girls care about looks in the sense of aesthetics but rather, girls care about looks conveying an interesting personality.

A guy with a face that is physically ugly, but is dressed in a sharp business suit is attractive to girls. Why? Because his *looks* convey an interesting personality: he is hard-working, a go-getter, an aggressive man who takes what he wants.

A guy with an average looking face who is dressed up in faded ripped jeans and a sideways cap with a skateboard conveys an interesting personality: he is cool, relaxed, and fun. Girls are fascinated by him.

Which is more attractive to girls, the guy with a business suit look, or a guy with a skateboard look? Depends on the girl. But the bottom line is, his *looks* convey an interesting personality. So just be yourself but make sure you express your unique personality through your looks.

Notice how a guy dressed up in a pair of sweatpants, old sneakers and unkempt hair does not convey a fascinating personality at all. Girls will pass over him.


Oscar Wilde was very perceptive.

Carson: A beautiful personality?
Wilde: Yes, a beautiful young man.
Carson: You mean a beautiful person?
Wilde: Yes, I would rather say beautiful personality.

Whenever Oscar Wilde used the term 'beautiful' to describe a man, he kept referring to *beautiful personality* not *physical beauty.*

This is why girls get turned on when guys all of a sudden put on say a firefighter uniform. It's not that the guy's looks became more physically beautiful once he donned the uniform, but rather that his looks now convey an attractive personality: firefighters are known for their bravery and courage.

Note: everything I have mentioned is in the initial stages of attraction. This will get her fascinated by you. But in the intermediate stages, you will need to show that your actions are congruent with your looks.

You could be decked out in a sharp suit and she will think you are an aggressive, confident type-A guy. But then once she gets to know you and realizes you are just a lazy bum through your actions, she will be ever the more disappointed that you were *fake* and she will drop you like it's hot.

Make sure your actions can back up the personality that your look conveys

 

[Army Strong]

good stuff

 

[the305]

good post - dead on man.

 

[zekko]

I hate to say it, but you might have something there.
Some might call it style.
Or as Mystery put it, "creating your avatar".

 

[Warrior74]

Good post Trader (never thought I would say that, ha!)

 

[backbreaker]

Good read. You are dead on.

But you should always dress the part.

I remember Amber my first Real adult GF, the day I first met her I had just left the gym, had on my gym clothes and was shopping for my dad a Fathers Day present. She gave me her number, but I mean it was one of those, flakyish type here is my number things, you guys know what I am talking about.

I went in the exact same store 2 weeks later after she flaked on me 3 times, this time, I was dressed to the 9. I had on some diesel fitted jeans, a banana republic french cut shirt and a burbury sports jacket with a custom made trucker hat and some white and blue pumas (that was my style back then). I was prtty ****ing clean if I may say so myself. I ran into her (seriusly was not looking for her, was looking for clothes as AI was sheeding weight and needed to find clothes that fit). When i say it was like, she was an entirely new person. she took a lunch break to go talk with me and was telling me how interesting I was and asking me what I do for a living and the whole time I'm like, damn.. I did the exact same thing 2 weeks ago. And I'm quite sure i wasn't just an ******* when I met you 2 weeks ago.

The only difference is, she caught me on a regular dressed day and not a gym clothes day.

From that day on I learned a very valuable lesson. I have no qualms about over dressing for anything but you will never, ever, ever catch me under dressed for anything. I don't care what it is. I've worn slacks to a bowling alley.

women pay too much attention to the way you dress for guys to put all this time in learning how to game girls "", and little to no effort on how to put a wardrobe together. Eve4ry guy hre should have clothing magazines and probably go over to style-forum and learn how to ****ing dress. We over analyze something that is really not all that complicated and don't' give that much effort to something that actually can get kinda dicey (learning how to dress and what is in style, what isn't, how clothes should fit,d different fabrics, different cuts, it gets interesting, learning how to REALLY freaking shave.. guys spending all this ****ing money on "expensive shoes" and have a ****ing 10 dollar wal mart razor and some ****ing Gillette shaving cream and think they are good to go... yet will spend 10 hours a week here debating the fine points of what to do when my girl looks left, coughs and puts her foot in the air")

Why make your job that much harder? spend some real time, learn how to groom your self like a ****ing man, learn how to dress like a man that has a half ass sense of style and that's half the battle. Those two things along with going to the gym every day, or at least 5 days a week, i will never be without female company if I don't want it.. catch worthy female company not skank *****s.

 

[horaholic]

Im gonna respectfully disagree here. I believe women who find your personality interesting will also find you more physically attractive. I think your theory is correct for a first impression though.

 

[jophil28]

From that day on I learned a very valuable lesson. I have no qualms about over dressing for anything but you will never, ever, ever catch me under dressed for anything.

True that.
Your dress style is your "presentation wrapping" to the world..
There is a casino near where I live . I often take a few hours to play some roulette and I notice that the young women who walk up and down and around the tables are dressed to kill. They are frequently with Gen Y guys who dress as if they are on work release. The standard uniform for 20 something guys seems to be some old faded tee which looks as if it was last washed and ironed in 1998 coupled with a shabby pair of jeans that he retrieved from the laundry basket just before his mother washed them .

These dumbfuks do not understand that some sharp 30 year old guy who understands that personal presentation is an essential component of "game" will steal their women in half a moment .

 

[squirrels]

I remember many years ago I saw a magazine lying on a table with an ad for some kind of cosmetic product or other on the back of it. The slogan was, "No one's going to spot you across a room and say, 'Hey! Nice personality!'"

 

[Trader]

I remember many years ago I saw a magazine lying on a table with an ad for some kind of cosmetic product or other on the back of it. The slogan was, "No one's going to spot you across a room and say, 'Hey! Nice personality!'"

Girls always complain that guys are the superficial ones - ignore them. Girls are way more superficial.

If we guys see a guy driving a Benz, we are a bit more cautious in assuming that his personality is ambitious and hard-working. We don't jump to that conclusion, because he could have just financed the car with debt, or leased it for a mere $400 a month.

But girls jump to all sorts of conclusions about a guy driving a Benz - he is *elite.*

It is so ironic that the notion that *all guys care about is looks* actually applies to girls more.

Girls are the ones that judge by the *package* more.

 

[The Mad Ghost]

What kind of man has a tat but wears a Rolex?

Can you further elaborate on this?

 

[backbreaker]

I have believed this same exact thing for awhile now.

It's all about the contrast, and Roissy talks about this sometime.

You take an ordinary Joe six-pack, and add something interesting to create something out of the ordinary. My own mix is a pick-up truck, the "House" look as far as facial hair, a Rolex and I dress like a guy in his mid 20's.

This combination works well for me, I frequently get IOI's from girls that I never used to get. The final touch was the new facial hair that I did. I do plan to add a tat to the mix though.

Most women do not expect to see that kind of combination on a man with average looks. What kind of man has a tat but wears a Rolex? These things make women interested in you.

http://straightfromthea.com/wp-content/uploads/2010/04/ex_50_cent_ap.jpg

 

[Trader]

What I am saying is, contrast makes a difference.

You will not see many men wearing a combination of a tat and a rolex. Altho someone found a pic of one, nice work!

Roissy had a great picture representing the same thing. Basically a thug walking a poodle. Two things you would never expect to see together. What the OP is saying relates very much to this concept and it is an important part of game.

It is almost a different flavor of being unpredictable. It draws women in. Use it to your advantage.

You are a wise man - repped.

Paradox is highly seductive.

Other examples which are highly seductive are: 'feminine clothing + strong masculine personality' - which is my style

'nerd look (sweater vest + glasses) + big muscles (jock)'

The tome "Art of Seduction" touches on this

 

[backbreaker]

I am the definition of a dandy.

 

[Falcon25]

Did you just figure out that attraction is through looks and not personality?

LOOKS TRUMPS EVERYTHING. Money is second. Personality and game a distant third...........Good Luck.

Just remember, if you are a fat fuvk, no matter what you wear, it aint gonna help you.

 

[Todd Preston]

Bha ahahaha.

2 Sayings from Old Past.

"Clothes make the man"

"People judge you by the Car you drive, the shoes you wear and the women you have on your arm"

 

[Rollo Tomassi]

Law 34: Be Royal in Your Own Fashion: Act Like a King to Be Treated Like One
The way you carry yourself will often determine how you are treated: In the long run, appearing vulgar or common will make people disrespect you. For a king respects himself and inspires the same sentiment in others. By acting regally and confident of your powers, you make yourself seem destined to wear a crown.

 

[J. Darko]

Finally, good advice. This is a scientific fact: people judge your personality by how you look. Research also says that attractive people get way more opportunities in their lifetime, plus attractive people tend to end up with attractive people, because relationships between people who are not equally attractive tend to be unhealthy, because the attractive one will feel unsure if he/she could not get any better and the less attractive one will be afraid of the attractive one leaving him/her.

In other words: it's about looks. It's all about looks. Game is a fairy tale you'd like to be believe. Marketeers know that, that's why they sell e-books with pick-up advice.

 

[Warrior74]

Finally, good advice. This is a scientific fact: people judge your personality by how you look. Research also says that attractive people get way more opportunities in their lifetime, plus attractive people tend to end up with attractive people, because relationships between people who are not equally attractive tend to be unhealthy, because the attractive one will feel unsure if he/she could not get any better and the less attractive one will be afraid of the attractive one leaving him/her.

In other words: it's about looks. It's all about looks. Game is a fairy tale you'd like to be believe. Marketeers know that, that's why they sell e-books with pick-up advice.

They sell you the misapplication of game. This is where limited thinking in the looks argument goes off the rails.

Game may get you a a point or two above what you normally pull, but the main point for most guys you see is to just be able to play in their own league. How many guys come here and just don't even know what to say to an average girl? That is the true application of game for the beginner. Marketers sell them the dream of landing dates with supermodels. But really its just basic social intelligence for the uninformed.

For the more experienced, with the proper clout, front and game (clout =status+money, front=style+clothing+physique, game = confidence+charisma+sexual energy), yes they can pull higher than their genetic looks give them. For an extreme example Jay Z and Beyonce. If he wasn't the richest guy in rap...no way in hell. Or any rock star. Most look like average doofuses.

But to just cry, LOOKS MATTER, I'M NOT GOOD LOOKING! and to give up is complete folly. You can raise every level of your game and pull a few points higher than you rate. That's the beauty of being a man. Women are born, burt a Man is made. You can make yourself into a better man.

 

[J. Darko]

They sell you the misapplication of game. This is where limited thinking in the looks argument goes off the rails.

Game may get you a a point or two above what you normally pull, but the main point for most guys you see is to just be able to play in their own league. How many guys come here and just don't even know what to say to an average girl? That is the true application of game for the beginner. Marketers sell them the dream of landing dates with supermodels. But really its just basic social intelligence for the uninformed.

For the more experienced, with the proper clout, front and game (clout =status+money, front=style+clothing+physique, game = confidence+charisma+sexual energy), yes they can pull higher than their genetic looks give them. For an extreme example Jay Z and Beyonce. If he wasn't the richest guy in rap...no way in hell. Or any rock star. Most look like average doofuses.

But to just cry, LOOKS MATTER, I'M NOT GOOD LOOKING! and to give up is complete folly. You can raise every level of your game and pull a few points higher than you rate. That's the beauty of being a man. Women are born, burt a Man is made. You can make yourself into a better man.

I understand now, but I was disappointed a while ago. You see, I was starting to believe that I could attract super models. Never lacked social skills. Only succes. Talked to a lot of girls, got a lot of hurt. I'm not going to blame external factors like looks, because that's weak.

But after many failures, I now believe I'm not going to get girls by luck, or by negging, or by ignoring girls, or by not putting girls on a pedestral. Game hasn't done anything for me. I just have to be a normal social person wit a back bone. So this is what I'm going to do: I'm going to work a lot, making a lot of money, buy a suit, a golden watch, and a big car. Build a big social network. And then watch what happends. Just spreading the word for other guys who keep trying but also keep failing. Status and looks. That must be it if all else fails.