Girlfriend joining a sorority.

[Sadao]

My girlfriend of 7 months is entertaining the idea of joining a sorority in the fall (her second year of college.) Now, she's very loyal, respectful, and very much so in love with me. Her reasoning is that she does not have that extremely close knit group of friends as she did in high school, partly due to the fact that she did not stay in dorms for her freshman year. The problem for me is that there will be situations on a weekly basis where we will be partying seperately because of the fact that sometimes a sorority will have to party with a frat and it's pretty much closed to anyone not involved in one of the two. I am not involved in greek like and am mildly uncomfortable with the fact that we'll be partying away from each other.

Now, my girlfriend has made it clear time and time again that she has no interest in "gross frat guys" and that if she wanted to cheat on me then she would not be in the relationship, and would at least have the respect to break up with me before doing so. I have a good amount of trust in my girlfriend and our relationship but the whole situation is still a tad bit unsettling to me and I'm just not sure if i'm willing to be in this kind of relationship.

Any input would be amazing, preferably from experience. Also keep in mind that my girlfriend isn't some drunk slut, I was DJ'ing and gaming chicks before her, so I made damn sure that she was a great catch before I invested myself in a relationship with her.

 

[WC2]

If you really believe that you're in a health relationship then you shouldn't have much to worry about. There's much more difficult things down the road to deal with besides your girlfriend joining a sorority.

Sure, she'll be partying separately and it's going to be a strain on you, but if you want to have a successful relationship then you can't be worrying about these things. It's fine to keep tabs on her from time to time, but don't be one of those guys who needs to know where his girl is all the time.

Do your thing, keep loving your girl, and if she's worth it she will remain faithful. However, if you start sweating the fact that she's doing this, she will sense it and she'll lose interest. Don't be a sucker for jealously.. trust me, it never works out!

I've dated 2 girls in sororities since being at college and only had a problem with one. Ironically, the problem occurred totally outside of school and had nothing to do with her being in a sorority.

Hold your head up and don't let your woman sway how you feel.

 

[Sadao]

good advice man, i really appreciate that.

 

[DonGorgon]

good advice man, i really appreciate that.

Well if se is gona be a ho she will do it wether in a sorority or not... So dont blame the sorority... just do your best to keep her occupied...

 

[aldaris]

omg, she is going to be used as a frats blow up doll. don't let her do it! i know. i was a phi delt! they all say the same **** to their old boyfriends. i have had more than one such hor wrestle with my third leg.

 

[oakraiderz2]

Everything you girl said are her beliefs...as an individual. Its POSSIBLE that once she joins shell become a different person. Just remember, groups have a lot of power on individuals. If she really wants to be accepted by her "sisters" shell do what it takes to become a "part" of them...so...

 

[dopexile]

I hate to be negative but this is gonna go downhill quick. You're only as good as the people you surround yourself with and soroity girls can be pretty slutty.

 

[The Inside Man]

Yeah man, it's on a downhill slide. She's going to be going to socials with frat nerds whether she wants to or not, and then shes going to be getting drunk there..yeah. GF joining a sorority is almost always a bad sign for the BF.

 

[mutambo]

Yes, Chop off her arm. She will instantly become less wanted round the frat boys

 

[DonGorgon]

omg, she is going to be used as a frats blow up doll. don't let her do it! i know. i was a phi delt! they all say the same **** to their old boyfriends. i have had more than one such hor wrestle with my third leg.

^ That is also true.

 

[Latinoman]

Dude...chances of she staying loyal (at such a young age and in such environment) are almost less than 5%.

 

[The Deacon]

Dude...chances of she staying loyal (at such a young age and in such environment) are almost less than 5%.

Yeah. Especially if she's hot. Hell, even if she's average-looking Frat guys are gonna try to work on her.

 

[DonGorgon]

Dude...chances of she staying loyal (at such a young age and in such environment) are almost less than 5%.

Chances of loyalty from any human under the age of 50 is not happening in 2008

 

[young_gun]

Since it's so blatantly obvious to me that none of you guys have girlfriends that are in sororities, and consequently, don't know what you're talking about, I'll help the original poster out here.

My girlfriend is in a sorority. When I met her, I knew she was in the sorority, I was OK with it, and I still am. Yes, she likes to party, but so do I, so I don't have a problem with it. We're 21 years old, and we like to have a good time. By the way, I'm always invited to the fraternity functions. Just because you aren't in the frat, doesn't mean you can't party with those guys. If you go to one of the parties with your girlfriend, and make friends with some of the guys in the frat (most of them are actually really cool guys) they'll invite you to come back and hang out with them.

Yes, there probably will a guy once in awhile that will try to get on your girlfriend. It happens. Especially if your girlfriend is hot (like you say she is), it isn't something you can really stop. It's nothing to get all bent all out of shape about. The way it works with the Greek system is that the girls usually pick one or two of the frats they like to party with, and they keep going to their parties. They meet some of the guys, and the guys learn that she has a boyfriend (you), so they don't bother making passes at your girlfriend. Especially if you've met these guys, they'll see you as a cool guy and they won't try to ruin your relationship.

It's pretty similar to letting your girlfriend go to the clubs with her friends. There will be guys that will try to pick up on her, but as long as you two are in love, you have nothing to worry about. If she's trustworthy, she won't be giving her number out and won't be going home with any of the other guys or anything. If you're really worried about it, just tell her you'll pick her up when she's ready to go home. Simple.

The thing that it boils down to is whether you trust your girlfriend to be loyal to you or not. She doesn't need a sorority or a bar to cheat on you. Most sorority girls have boyfriends, and (to my knowledge) haven't cheated on them. Just because your girlfriend is in a sorority doesn't mean your relationship is in jeopardy. If she's going to cheat, she'll cheat. But if she's really a trustworthy girl, it won't matter if she's in a sorority or not.

Just keep being the best boyfriend to her and that includes not getting jealous over little things. If you let jealousy into your relationship, it's something that will slowly eat away at your relationship, and before you know it, it's over, because your speculations got the best of you. Read these three posts, they have helped me out a LOT.

http://www.sosuave.net/forum/showthread.php?t=122214&highlight=jealousy
http://www.sosuave.net/forum/showthread.php?p=149385#post149385
http://sosuave.com/articles/jealous.htm

And remember, if she cheats on you, she wasn't worth having anyway.

 

[tick37]

You'll have an opportunity to meet many other hot sorority chicks through her. Why don't you just join a frat? It's fockin' fun a shiznit. You'll meet so many women and new friends that you'll forget you were dating her. You're at that age where you should be creating great memories and life-long friends.

 

[aldaris]

Since it's so blatantly obvious to me that none of you guys have girlfriends that are in sororities, and consequently, don't know what you're talking about, I'll help the original poster out here.

My girlfriend is in a sorority. When I met her, I knew she was in the sorority, I was OK with it, and I still am. Yes, she likes to party, but so do I, so I don't have a problem with it. We're 21 years old, and we like to have a good time. By the way, I'm always invited to the fraternity functions. Just because you aren't in the frat, doesn't mean you can't party with those guys. If you go to one of the parties with your girlfriend, and make friends with some of the guys in the frat (most of them are actually really cool guys) they'll invite you to come back and hang out with them.

Yes, there probably will a guy once in awhile that will try to get on your girlfriend. It happens. Especially if your girlfriend is hot (like you say she is), it isn't something you can really stop. It's nothing to get all bent all out of shape about. The way it works with the Greek system is that the girls usually pick one or two of the frats they like to party with, and they keep going to their parties. They meet some of the guys, and the guys learn that she has a boyfriend (you), so they don't bother making passes at your girlfriend. Especially if you've met these guys, they'll see you as a cool guy and they won't try to ruin your relationship.

It's pretty similar to letting your girlfriend go to the clubs with her friends. There will be guys that will try to pick up on her, but as long as you two are in love, you have nothing to worry about. If she's trustworthy, she won't be giving her number out and won't be going home with any of the other guys or anything. If you're really worried about it, just tell her you'll pick her up when she's ready to go home. Simple.

The thing that it boils down to is whether you trust your girlfriend to be loyal to you or not. She doesn't need a sorority or a bar to cheat on you. Most sorority girls have boyfriends, and (to my knowledge) haven't cheated on them. Just because your girlfriend is in a sorority doesn't mean your relationship is in jeopardy. If she's going to cheat, she'll cheat. But if she's really a trustworthy girl, it won't matter if she's in a sorority or not.

Just keep being the best boyfriend to her and that includes not getting jealous over little things. If you let jealousy into your relationship, it's something that will slowly eat away at your relationship, and before you know it, it's over, because your speculations got the best of you. Read these three posts, they have helped me out a LOT.

http://www.sosuave.net/forum/showthread.php?t=122214&highlight=jealousy
http://www.sosuave.net/forum/showthread.php?p=149385#post149385
http://sosuave.com/articles/jealous.htm

And remember, if she cheats on you, she wasn't worth having anyway.

men like you are the reason that more than half of american marriages end in divorce. greeks are all about getting action. you know it and i know it. nothing worse than being that lonely guy who can't find anyone to share a dorm or apartment with. america is a cold hard place! fattest teens on the planet and 1 in 4 has VD! those of us who choose to stay should get a medal.

 

[DonGorgon]

Trust Deos Not Make Everything Ok....

 

[Latinoman]

Since it's so blatantly obvious to me that none of you guys have girlfriends that are in sororities, and consequently, don't know what you're talking about, I'll help the original poster out here.

My girlfriend is in a sorority. When I met her, I knew she was in the sorority, I was OK with it, and I still am. Yes, she likes to party, but so do I, so I don't have a problem with it. We're 21 years old, and we like to have a good time. By the way, I'm always invited to the fraternity functions. Just because you aren't in the frat, doesn't mean you can't party with those guys. If you go to one of the parties with your girlfriend, and make friends with some of the guys in the frat (most of them are actually really cool guys) they'll invite you to come back and hang out with them.

Yes, there probably will a guy once in awhile that will try to get on your girlfriend. It happens. Especially if your girlfriend is hot (like you say she is), it isn't something you can really stop. It's nothing to get all bent all out of shape about. The way it works with the Greek system is that the girls usually pick one or two of the frats they like to party with, and they keep going to their parties. They meet some of the guys, and the guys learn that she has a boyfriend (you), so they don't bother making passes at your girlfriend. Especially if you've met these guys, they'll see you as a cool guy and they won't try to ruin your relationship.

It's pretty similar to letting your girlfriend go to the clubs with her friends. There will be guys that will try to pick up on her, but as long as you two are in love, you have nothing to worry about. If she's trustworthy, she won't be giving her number out and won't be going home with any of the other guys or anything. If you're really worried about it, just tell her you'll pick her up when she's ready to go home. Simple.

The thing that it boils down to is whether you trust your girlfriend to be loyal to you or not. She doesn't need a sorority or a bar to cheat on you. Most sorority girls have boyfriends, and (to my knowledge) haven't cheated on them. Just because your girlfriend is in a sorority doesn't mean your relationship is in jeopardy. If she's going to cheat, she'll cheat. But if she's really a trustworthy girl, it won't matter if she's in a sorority or not.

Just keep being the best boyfriend to her and that includes not getting jealous over little things. If you let jealousy into your relationship, it's something that will slowly eat away at your relationship, and before you know it, it's over, because your speculations got the best of you. Read these three posts, they have helped me out a LOT.

http://www.sosuave.net/forum/showthread.php?t=122214&highlight=jealousy
http://www.sosuave.net/forum/showthread.php?p=149385#post149385
http://sosuave.com/articles/jealous.htm

And remember, if she cheats on you, she wasn't worth having anyway.

HAHAHA. You are funny and very naive.

 

[sherineo]

do you understand why James Bond does not get into a relationship with any of the Bond Girls after beating up the bad guys...though chemistry is always awesome...


Daniel Craig truly learnt a lesson in the last installment...

why? why? why?

coz' more than anything he respects his own freedom...and no matter what how great secure divine ideal loving one of its kind your relationship you have with this girl ... it has tamed you ...

Be Ready to Walk Away...Be Ready to Walk Alone...


sherineo

 

[KnockoutJM]

Don't Worry about your girlfriend joining a sorority. Honestly not all sororities are slutty or cokeheads. You do not have to party separately except for when she is pledging. The "parties where sororities are with a frat" aka a social are not required. So if she does say she is forced to go she is lying to you. And btw socials suck. They are only there to get free drinks and possibly hook up.