Your biggest problem right now is your communication skills. Forget openers.. they just stress you out and make you think that if you don't have the 'perfect' opener the conversation will fail. A conversation is not made or broken by an opener.
Why can't you communicate to women? Did you know there really just like us just with a set of breasts and a *****. And they're stupid? Did you also know that they're just as initimidated of us then we are of them?
You know how many girls I've came across that didn't know what to say to me, and that they got nervous and choked? Alot. My previous ex-gf choked twice for example!! She didn't know what to say and she asked for a second chance. That was a 7 month relationship.
What you think is that these girls have some of power, they really don't. Girls don't sit in the back and laugh at all the guys that approached them. In fact, they really never think about it unless we're talking about the guy they really dig - Then they wont shut up about them. But for the most part, girls have their own insecurities and so on. You kow even the prettiest girl out there, has so many insecurities. They have enough insecurities to worry about then to point out yours.
But see, you really do look at it all wrong. You act all shy, acting as if you dont care to talk, but really in truely - everyone knows you're shy and to scared to speak. You're better off on talking then being shy, you're better off on doing it then regreting that you never did it. Take opportunities when you see them.
And I don't mean go sit at home and plan a conversation - Then drag a girl out of a pack and present your lines. This means, actually talk to a girl without ever thinking of an opener or a closer or anything. Just talk as if they're normal. You know, they're human beings too - They just want you to talk to them like they're a person, not some God.
If you have nothing more to say, just leave. Leave the conversation, or get busy with something else. If I have nothing more to sayI just look at something and just walk up to it without sayin anything more... sortof wierd I know but it works.
Now, just remember -- You don't have to produce everything in the conversation - Let her talk.. Make her do halfies.. If theres silence, just walk away. Simple. Believe me, not every girl is good at conversations. They'll bore you out. I get so bored with some girls, I just want to sleeeepp..
But see, you never see that because you never talk to find this stuff out. You never talk enough to give a girl a sense of your personality. Girls love a guy with a personality. The guys that sit back and are all shy get nowhere. They don't get recognized, they're just thought of that they have no personality or way to scared of rejection.
So do this... Talk to EVERYONE you come across. Not just girls that you're interested in. If you go to the grocery store, talk to the clerk, if you go to a resturant, talk to the waiter and host, go to whatever not to the employees. These are perfect opportunities to talk to someone and to learn how to display your personality threw conversation. Talk to men, women, or chewbaca - whatever it is talk to them.
Some things to look for and answer are.....
do you give eye contact?
do you figit?
do you move around alot?
what are your nervous habits?
Does the way you face matter in conversation?
What type of conversations are best for small talk?
Can you walk into the place at another time, and will they notice you?
how do people react towards me?
how can you tell someone chokes?
what are negative body language signals that warns you to end conversation?
You should find that people are interested in what you have to say; And actually show interest in you. It takes time bro, but lets work on your communication.
I hope that helps, we'll just do baby steps and take our time with it. It's not an over night thing, it's nothing to really worry about. Have patience and pace things along - Don't even think tiwce about getting numbers.. lets also work into that..
