Girl flaked on me after schedule a date

[Young OG]

Wrong. You are assuming this girl actually had intention to go on this date. (Hint: she didn’t)

How do you know that? You were able to read her mind?

 

[EyeBRollin]

How do you know that? You were able to read her mind?

If she wanted to go on the date, she would have went on the date. Furthermore, if she wanted to “check in” before the date, she would have hit him up.

 

[Bokanovsky]

Wtf is this shvt? All I am reading is that you lack the ability to hold a normal conversation with a female, so you mitigate your Achilles heel by ghosting a girl til the date. “Hi, how has your day been?” is so hard and stressful to send?

Oh WOW, I have totally changed my mind after reading your post. I can just imagine a girl thinking: "I was sooooo looking forward to meeting this guy on Friday, but he hasn't sent me a generic, annoying "hi, how has your day been?" text in two days, so I'm going to cancel the date and block his number." This kind of thing happens all the time in real life I'm sure

 

[CornbreadFed]

If she wanted to go on the date, she would have went on the date. Furthermore, if she wanted to “check in” before the date, she would have hit him up.

This isn’t some girl OP met through social circle game or a warm approach. This is an OLD lead meaning OP is a total stranger in her eyes and could easily be cat fishing or a creep. You might think it is normal, but most people do not just go out on random outings with complete strangers. You expect a girl to throw out every defense mechanism for OP exceptionally, but still be loyal and not a complete opportunist in a relationship?

 

[Bokanovsky]

if you send her a stupid text "how are you today?" "how was your day?" "are you excited about our date next week?" I just don't see what purpose that serves.

You can also switch it up with "how do you like the weather today?" That would REALLY make your date wet.

 

[CornbreadFed]

Oh WOW, I have totally changed my mind after reading your post. I can just imagine a girl thinking: "I was sooooo looking forward to meeting this guy on Friday, but he hasn't sent me a generic, annoying "hi, how has your day been?" text in two days, so I'm going to cancel the date and block his number." This kind of thing happens all the time in real life I'm sure

Or if your not a socially inept NPC brainwashed by the pill rage-

Girl: This cute guy asked me out on a date during the same time, but I am going to go with the other guy because I felt more of a connection with him. I had a really rough day and I thought it was nice of him to ask me how my day was and I loved the fact that he told me that he had just got done working out because I am looking for a guy that is in shape with a healthy routine.

Y’all are not the only guys this girl is talking to…especially on OLD. Doing nothing is basically putting your head in the sand. If having a basic @$$ introduction text conversation is too complex and stressful for you then you need refocus your priorities on seeing a psychiatrist rather than dating. Y’all are over hear crying about how bad OLD is when I am literally reading part of the problem right here and now.

 

[kavi]

Trends change really fast esp these days. You wanna keep things as stable as possible. My opinion is that the whole "dont talk too much before the date, txting, messaging is just for losers, etc" that whole thing is gonna get outdated fast.

I think you wanna keep things stable and try to be stable and calm. In the past women were more shallow so it did work not to talk much and play it mysterious like a badboy "i dnt have time to txt only talk on the date" but these things move fast and i think we are already past that cos those games get old quick.

 

[Bokanovsky]

Girl: This cute guy asked me out on a date during the same time, but I am going to go with the other guy because I felt more of a connection with him. I had a really rough day and I thought it was nice of him to ask me how my day was and I loved the fact that he told me that he had just got done working out because I am looking for a guy that is in shape with a healthy routine.

You've been reading too many romance novels. Given those two options, she will go with the guy who...is hotter and taller.

 

[sangheilios]

@holidayad_

I haven't read through all of the comments. I'm assuming you two had been talking at least a little until you both agreed to setting up a date. I don't see why there would be a reason to continue to talk to one another through texting until maybe just confirming the date or something like "Hey, I'll send you a text tomorrow to check in before we meet up" or something like that. I'd always confirm before leaving on a scheduled date though, you never know if something came up on her end or if she might not even show up lol. The only issue I can see here is if she was messaging you and you just weren't responding at all.

I wouldn't worry about it, she probably just didn't have that much interest to begin with.

 

[kavi]

Oh WOW, I have totally changed my mind after reading your post. I can just imagine a girl thinking: "I was sooooo looking forward to meeting this guy on Friday, but he hasn't sent me a generic, annoying "hi, how has your day been?" text in two days, so I'm going to cancel the date and block his number." This kind of thing happens all the time in real life I'm sure

On the flipside

Monday: Txtting
Tuesday: txting
Wednesday: txting setup the date for saturday
Thurs: Nothing
Friday; Nothing
Saturday: Flaking

After the date is setup you can maybe go one day without messaging but you wanna be checking in with messages after that.

 

[kavi]

Think about it from a girls POV. Guy didnt txt after he got what he wanted , a date. So guy wont txt after he gets what he wants, sex. Get it, its the same ****.

 

[holidayad_]

@holidayad_

I haven't read through all of the comments. I'm assuming you two had been talking at least a little until you both agreed to setting up a date. I don't see why there would be a reason to continue to talk to one another through texting until maybe just confirming the date or something like "Hey, I'll send you a text tomorrow to check in before we meet up" or something like that. I'd always confirm before leaving on a scheduled date though, you never know if something came up on her end or if she might not even show up lol. The only issue I can see here is if she was messaging you and you just weren't responding at all.

I wouldn't worry about it, she probably just didn't have that much interest to begin with.

Exactly what I did. In the morning, just texted her "See you tonight " and then she replied in that way like I said in the opening post.

 

[Bokanovsky]

On the flipside

Monday: Txtting
Tuesday: txting
Wednesday: txting setup the date for saturday
Thurs: Nothing
Friday; Nothing

Based on my personal experience over many years, doing the above does not in any way increase the risk of flaking. I've experimented with both, sending "maintenance texts" and going radio silence for a couple of days and there is no appreciable difference.

 

[CornbreadFed]

You've been reading too many romance novels. Given those two options, she will go with the guy who...is hotter and taller.

Maybe, but those guys are a dime a dozen to a girl. If you are relatively attractive to her and there’s potential chemistry, she’s going to choose you over the hotter guy that is awkward and no chemistry.

 

[sangheilios]

Exactly what I did. In the morning, just texted her "See you tonight " and then she replied in that way like I said in the opening post.

I wouldn't worry about it then. You are investing your own time and energy posting about some stupid woman you met off Tinder, that you don't even know, that could instead be utilized for something else. I'm not saying this to make fun of you, I just wouldn't bother going out of my way to analyze the behavior of a total stranger lol.

 

[EyeBRollin]

Based on my personal experience over many years, doing the above does not in any way increase the risk of flaking. I've experimented with both, sending "maintenance texts" and going radio silence for a couple of days and there is no appreciable difference.

Ding ding ding!

If she wants to go on the date, she will go on the date. When I was busy triple booking dates, some unlucky girls would get “ghosted” for an entire week leading up to the date.. only to be reminded by the girl:

“Hey, are we still on?!”

These guys don’t get it.

 

[Bokanovsky]

Ding ding ding!

If she wants to go on the date, she will go on the date. When I was busy triple booking dates, some unlucky girls would get “ghosted” for an entire week leading up to the date.. only to be reminded by the girl:

“Hey, are we still on?!”

These guys don’t get it.

This mirrors my experience. But according to CornbreadFed, failing to bombard your date with autistic small talk will surely kill all attraction.

 

[CornbreadFed]

This mirrors my experience. But according to CornbreadFed, failing to bombard your date with autistic small talk will surely kill all attraction.

Unlike y’all I don’t need to triple book dates in insurance of a flake, so I have the time for small talk

 

[Peaks&Valleys]

She blocked me everywhere, actually. Crazy.

^Yep

 

[EyeBRollin]

Unlike y’all I don’t need to triple book dates in insurance of a flake, so I have the time for small talk

Flakes are part of the game. You should have better things to do than shooting the bull with a woman.