Girl flaked on me after schedule a date

[Young OG]

That's her point of view. That's the RIGHT point of view? Should I keep texting to any girl after scheduling a date? Now sounds obvious but you know what I mean?!

Her point of view is correct. You didn’t text for 3-4 days. You messed up. Learn from this

 

[SW15]

What's the point to keep texting after we agreed on a date, mate?

I agree with you but women today require near constant attention if first interacted with on apps unless you're an absolute alpha male. Women make rules for betas and break rules for alphas.

This is part of why I don't do apps. Apps are a horse shiit environment. I arrange dates in person but collect a phone number for necessary communication only. I set that expectation in person and if that's not ok, they can stick it where the sun doesn't shine.

why would you not have a conversation like a normal human being with someone you have a date with?

Back in 1985, when a man set up a date from an in-person approach, he didn't call her on her landline telephone every day for the 4 days in between dates.

 

[holidayad_]

Her point of view is correct. You didn’t text for 3-4 days. You messed up. Learn from this

Noted and respect your view. It's just that I don't want to be (or look like) a girl's text buddy especially if I don't even touched her yet or more, see her in person. But that's just me.

 

[holidayad_]

I agree with you but women today require near constant attention if first interacted with on apps

Yeah. I will try this and see how it works for the next one.

 

[Young OG]

Noted and respect your view. It's just that I don't want to be (or look like) a girl's text buddy especially if I don't even touched her yet or more, see her in person. But that's just me.

You could have text her at least one of those 3-4 days before the date and it would have probably avoided the flake. You aren’t a text buddy by doing that.

 

[Peaks&Valleys]

This is too much. This forum has turned blue pill. Good luck OP sifting through this madness. Feel free to message me.

 

[Dash Riprock]

Gotcha.

Do you think that I would be able to improve her interest level by texting her like on a daily basis? Asking because I never do it for some reason, such as: 1) busy, 2) game. And until today, I had never got a flake like that for not texting a girl on a daily basis.

In today's dating world, keeping the prospect warm is important. Sending her one text per day, about anything really, would have saved this date for you. Being the strong silent type over text when she doesn't even know you will bomb every time if the girl is even half attractive. Next time, keep the idle chit chat going until date day. Send her a link to a cool band, tell her something funny that happened to you, whatever. Women thrive on communication.

Good luck.

 

[The Duke]

Always stay true to who you are. Some will respond others won't. It's a good way to sort out the ones who get you and the ones who don't.

 

[espanish]

many replies here engage in confirmation bias. they think there was something wrong with what you did because she flaked. if the girl had not flaked, everybody here would be saying "good job bro, by ignoring her you didn't appear needy"
a guy texting a girl every day is either gay or needs to get a life.
sounds like she got cold feet and this was just an excuse for her to get out of the date.

 

[espanish]

In today's dating world, keeping the prospect warm is important. Sending her one text per day, about anything really, would have saved this date for you. Being the strong silent type over text when she doesn't even know you will bomb every time if the girl is even half attractive. Next time, keep the idle chit chat going until date day. Send her a link to a cool band, tell her something funny that happened to you, whatever. Women thrive on communication.

Good luck.

sorry but no. why would you send someone a link to a band that you enjoy when you don't know anything about her? this is not your gf, this is some random girl.

 

[member160292]

In today's dating world, keeping the prospect warm is important. Sending her one text per day, about anything really, would have saved this date for you. Being the strong silent type over text when she doesn't even know you will bomb every time if the girl is even half attractive. Next time, keep the idle chit chat going until date day. Send her a link to a cool band, tell her something funny that happened to you, whatever. Women thrive on communication.

Good luck.

Women. Thrive. On. Communication.

 

[CornbreadFed]

many replies here engage in confirmation bias. they think there was something wrong with what you did because she flaked. if the girl had not flaked, everybody here would be saying "good job bro, by ignoring her you didn't appear needy"
a guy texting a girl every day is either gay or needs to get a life.
sounds like she got cold feet and this was just an excuse for her to get out of the date.

But she flaked and it didn’t happen. Having a conversation with a human being is not needy, it’s called being a fvcking normal human being.

 

[espanish]

But she flaked and it didn’t happen. Having a conversation with a human being is not needy, it’s called being a fvcking normal human being.

I never said it's needy. where does it say it's needy?
had a friend who met this girl online. the first date just so happened to be the girl's birthday. my friend went and bought her a $120 gift on the first date for a girl that he doesn't know. that's how I feel about texting a girl you don't know. you are getting too excited and invested.

 

[Dr.Suave]

You made a mistake. The mistake was not talking to her after you setup the date

I agree he made a mistake. His mistake was single booking instead of triple booking.

 

[CornbreadFed]

I had a friend who met this girl online. the first date just so happened to be the girl's birthday. my friend went and bought her a $120 gift on the first date for a girl that he doesn't know. that's how I feel about texting a girl you don't know. you are getting too excited and invested.

so texting a girl is too much investment , but spending 1-3 hours of your free time/money on a stranger isn’t? Oh wait, y’all don’t go on dates, the 10s just come straight to your places. Let’s just invite a stranger in to our apartment whom I’ve only had a brief conversation with because texting is too much investment. Come on bro, you are better than this.

 

[EyeBRollin]

So you set up a date with a girl and completely ghosted her til the day of the date to confirm the date and you are confused on why she flaked

Had nothing to do with it.

 

[EyeBRollin]

You could have text her at least one of those 3-4 days before the date and it would have probably avoided the flake.

Wrong. You are assuming this girl actually had intention to go on this date. (Hint: she didn’t)

 

[CornbreadFed]

Wrong. You are assuming this girl actually had intention to go on this date. (Hint: she didn’t)

If a girl ghosted you til the day of the date, would you want to waste your valuable free time and resources on her?

 

[EyeBRollin]

If a girl ghosted you til the day of the date, would you want to waste your valuable free time and resources on her?

Meaning she never hit me up and just showed up?

Yes, I’ve had dozens of first dates in that exact sequence.

 

[SW15]

In today's dating world, keeping the prospect warm is important. Sending her one text per day, about anything really, would have saved this date for you. Being the strong silent type over text when she doesn't even know you will bomb every time if the girl is even half attractive. Next time, keep the idle chit chat going until date day. Send her a link to a cool band, tell her something funny that happened to you, whatever. Women thrive on communication.

I would argue that 'prospect warming' is more of a thing from tech-based date arranging methods than arranging dates from in-person approaches. If someone is arranging dates from in-person chats, I think they can go 3-4 days from the initial approach until the day of the date without a phone call or text.

As I said earlier, back in 1985, when a man set up a date from an in-person approach, he didn't call her on her landline telephone every day for the 4 days in between the approach and the first date. That communication effort would have been considered odd up until text messaging came around in the 2nd half of the 2000s.