Girl answers texts of ex-bf after we fvck

runner83

Master Don Juan
Joined
Feb 22, 2010
Messages
1,098
Reaction score
47
Location
Australia
st_99 said:
I guess the bottom line is his reaction was neither right or wrong.

The point is, what exactly is your goal here??

For her to be your GF, a FB,
a ONS? I'm thinking by your reaction you probably wanted to "date"
this girl to see where it goes because you kind of like her.

So, having said that, you just quickly witnessed some lame behavior which probably disqualifies her as a potential relationship type. And, your reaction doesn't matter because who gives a fvck what she thinks of you, the only thing that matters is that she displayed some ho ish behavior.

If you wanted to keep her as a FB a little while longer then you way over reacted.
Absolutely correct.

Response of the OP in walking out was either right or wrong depending on whether you wanted her for FB or STR / LTR.
 

Ease

Master Don Juan
Joined
Jul 23, 2009
Messages
1,325
Reaction score
51
There is a big difference between her answering texts during a date, and after sex.

During the date = You are the loser.

After she just got ****ed by you = He is the loser.

Getting annoyed like you did would have been fine if it was during the date, or at least disrespectful. But it was more of a compliment to you more than anything. You could have laughed at the loser ex-bf together.
 

zekko

Master Don Juan
Joined
Aug 6, 2009
Messages
16,038
Reaction score
8,874
He's not exclusive with the girl so why does he care who she talks to?
Is he upset because she still talks to her ex or because she texted on her phone while with him? I know some people are into the whole "turn the phone off" thing, but it WAS three in the morning.

I agree it might be a yellow flag if he's looking for a relationship, but even so they're not exclusive yet.
 

backbreaker

Master Don Juan
Joined
Apr 24, 2002
Messages
11,573
Reaction score
572
Location
monrovia, CA
zekko said:
He's not exclusive with the girl so why does he care who she talks to?
Is he upset because she still talks to her ex or because she texted on her phone while with him? I know some people are into the whole "turn the phone off" thing, but it WAS three in the morning.

I agree it might be a yellow flag if he's looking for a relationship, but even so they're not exclusive yet.
Because when you are with one person, rather you are ****ing or dating, you are with that person. Doesn't matter if you are exclusive or not. Not being exclusive, does not give you the right or justify being a ****.

When I go over a girls house, when I decide to spend time with a girl, rather it is a date, sex, just sleeping over, she has all my attention and I have all her attention. The second someone else enters the fray I'm gone. It has nothing to do with jealous, you can both know that you are not exclusive, but still have the common curiosity not to flunt your other relationships in front of the other person like she did with him.

She knew exactly; what she was doing. I can tell simply by reading that she is a jealous woman with probably some issues that would not make her an attractive LTR regardless of how hot she is. She knew that not answering the phone was the correct play, that's why she apologized. She answered the phone to get some emotion out of the OP, to stir **** up, to bring her other relationships to the fray, and we don't put up with that crap.

I've been in relationships here we both knew "what the deal was". we both knew that we were screwing other people and not once did a woman ever pull some **** like that, or she would have been kicked to the curve. I mean we talk about certain things at times, one girl in particular she wanted to date me, i wanted to date her, but neither of us would blink as far as who would drop the rest of our plates. She would talk to me often about how needy her ex BF was and how she didn't like that part of him and **** like that. But when he called and i was around the phone got cut off, even though I knew she was still ****ing him. And when she came over my house and even though she knew she wasn't the only one i was ****ing, the phone went off. That's just, grown people ****ing common courtesy.

One time in particular I went over her house on a saturday, dude was in true all star AFC white knight form this particular day and was blowing up her phone all morning. she can't just cut her phone off beucase she was expecting a call from her sister out of town. She did not answer the phone. After about 45 mintues of thep hone blowing up she looke dat me and said 'do you mind if i take this call' and i said go ahead.

that's, how a woman, handles that situtation. they don't run into the bathroom and lie about some ****. i didn't give a ****, hell she just blew me lol what am I worried for? but, you aren't going to just disrespect me by not acknowledging i'm there and talking to him in front of me.

Next, you have to establish the correct fame in any relationship. A woman that has no qualms about calling her ex after screwing you is the woman who sees nothing wrong, going out to eat with her guy friend 2 years in your relationship, but he's just a friend. Nip that in the buttox right now


Last, but not least, and this is advanced DJ 101 stuff right here, there is a very fine line, between not caring and showing her you like her, even if you don't lol. Women don't want a white knight, but at the same time they don't want a guy who is 100% aloof either. They want to know they are wanted, if that makes sense. By taking that stance, as long as the rest of your game is tight, it makes them feel wanted, yet not smothered.

I was lying in bed with her, actuality night lol, shows how effective that guy was, and she told me I like you, because you want me, but you don't need me.All women want to feel wanted, but none want to feel needed. that, is what the kids today call "game". Game is not just a frame of mind or neg hitting and stuff like that, game is being able to get a woman to do what you want when you want her to do it, yet while being able to do what you want at the same time. not long after that incident, kshe cut contact with him completely and was ready to settle down with me, and i went going strong for another 4 months or so.

OP could not possibly have handled the situation any better. You guys need to read that 10x
 

bukowski_merit

Master Don Juan
Joined
May 27, 2007
Messages
1,321
Reaction score
159
Location
Tri-State
backbreaker said:
When I go over a girls house, when I decide to spend time with a girl, rather it is a date, sex, just sleeping over, she has all my attention and I have all her attention.
This is all well and good; and honestly - you guys giving each other your full attention is perfectly romantic. But expecting a woman to "honor" some kind of code - is dumb.

Women know NOTHING of honor. A lot of your "angry at women" posts I see are based on your unreal expectations of honor. From your current woman, to her friends, to random women - - - you routinely expect honorable actions from women. And when they let you down - you lash out.

Expect that sh!t from your male friends (but don't count on it), DO NOT expect it from women. Expect the unexpected from them, and give it in return.


---

As far as this situation - - - The OP handled it how he wanted to handle it.

He neither deserves virtual props or lashes.

I personally would only find it disrespectful if she was doing it while i was trying to actively engage her attention (such as on a date, while making out, while "having" sex, etc).

After sex - i really wouldn't care unless she was a GF or wife or something. If it's just some girl im screwing - I'd be most angry at myself for not knocking her out sexually so that she couldn't answer her phone... =)

But the OP has expectations of this woman... Unreal as they are - he followed through with his actions. Can't fault him for having the balls to do that (95% of men wouldn't.)
---



I will say that NO MATTER WHAT - the woman will see it as a jealousy thing.

You can tell her it was disrespect.
You can tell her you wouldn't do it to her and expect the same in return.
You can tell her you don't have a jealousy bone in your body.

All her evolutionary detector will hear is: "I'm jealous and want all of your attention."

Since you're done with this woman though - I guess it doesn't matter.

You are done with her, right?
 

st_99

Master Don Juan
Joined
Apr 20, 2006
Messages
1,786
Reaction score
58
SharinganUser said:
He should've grabbed the phone from her, set it to vibrate and then shoved it in her vagina.

Post of the year.

:crackup:
 

Voice

Senior Don Juan
Joined
Jun 4, 2008
Messages
478
Reaction score
39
SharinganUser said:
The point is that he let a woman affect his frame of mind. As Diaforetikos said, shows a lot of insecurity. He didn't have to put up with it, but he also didn't have to walk out on the girl.

A similar thing happened to me last year. I was in bed with a chick I picked up at the bar, and we'd just finished fvcking. She turns on her phone and starts reading these txts from some guy from her city. Did I get upset and walk out or kick her out? No.

What I did was read the texts with her, we had laugh at how much of a pathetic afc loser this guy was(he asked her what she wanted from the "relationship" even though they weren't really in one), I called him a pansy, then we started fvcking again. Best 5 night stand ever.
Best post in this thread.

I took this advice last night because the same exact thing happened to me. It was the girl's ex. She was even texting him when we were in bed together. I peeked at her phone and the text said "So this means you and I aren't going to cuddle tonight?". I read it out loud and busted out laughing. I asked her if it turned her on. We continued to read the future texts together and made fun of him together. I even said relax and give the poor guy a chance.

This way it showed I was secure, made the situation funny and proceeded to show how lame her ex really was. She put the phone down laughing and we proceeded to fvck.

Why leave when you can turn the situation in your favor?
 

juan95

Don Juan
Joined
Dec 16, 2010
Messages
20
Reaction score
1
He could have been more chill about the situation, but if he is so inclined to walk out on her, he has every right to.
There really is no absolute truth in this situation. He did what would have best hold together his frame in accordance with his personality.
 

European-DJ

Master Don Juan
Joined
Dec 13, 2010
Messages
704
Reaction score
165
Location
Europe
You definatly did the right thing.

I dunno, perhaps if the sex was good, i would go for the second round now that she offers it, and then just leave.
 

SamoJednom

Don Juan
Joined
Jan 12, 2007
Messages
124
Reaction score
0
Everyone has different standards when it comes to this stuff. This is his position on it.

Edit: It has nothing to do with his frame or "insecurity". I think backbreaker summarized it quite well and it's how the OP's personality/character is.
 

TheAnswer_

Don Juan
Joined
Jan 4, 2009
Messages
25
Reaction score
0
Truthseeker44 said:
CantTouchMyStyle.......Man I admire the fact you are able to so easily walk away froma chick and not even sweat teh *****/sex!!!!!.....Right now I am involved in a dysfunctional relationship with a woman I think is Histrionic (single mom) and a lot of push pull going on.....She is not healthy for me mentally or emotionally and yet i have decided to express my anger/frustration by banging her as hard and as often as she will let me......Anyway, more power to you......You have standards which a lot of us horny bastards dont :)
Man for real though never sell yourself for some *****.
 
Top