Ghosted after first date?

[user252009]

Whether you use "What does your schedule look like" or "Lets go to such and such place at this time".....it doesnt matter as much as you think.

Do you want to know what REALLY matters? Sexual interest level and attraction level. If her interest is super high, she will be open all week and she will certainly make herself free at the time you suggest.

If you have to treat how you ask a chick out like calculus, you're already overthinking things because your gut tells you she isnt as interested in you as you are in her.

Think about that.

Problem is that most women have low interest for most men

 

[Glassguy]

Problem is that most women have low interest for most men

Disagree.

Most women have high interest for a very low percentage of men. Lets say the top 15% of men. With OLD and other social connection based platforms, women can get free attention and it makes a 6 think she is a 9. So the 6 will only "date" a 9......In turn that 6 never gets a date because the top % of men commenting on their pics, in their DMs and hitting them up on OLD only want to pump and dump them.

This is mirage that women have in the dating world today.....their value is overly inflated because of the "free" attention they get online.

 

[SW15]

IMO OLD will NEVER replace not being a man who can talk to strangers and women in real terms. (Approach what attracts you)
OLD is a tool for some and a barrier for most.

Most women have high interest for a very low percentage of men. Lets say the top 15% of men. With OLD and other social connection based platforms, women can get free attention and it makes a 6 think she is a 9. So the 6 will only "date" a 9......In turn that 6 never gets a date because the top % of men commenting on their pics, in their DMs and hitting them up on OLD only want to pump and dump them.

This is mirage that women have in the dating world today.....their value is overly inflated because of the "free" attention they get online.

Agree that websites/swipe apps will serve as a barrier to most.

I have wondered how many "one date, no sex, no second date" interactions could be avoided if a man elects not to partake in the swipe game. My perception is that the majority of those "one date, no sex, no second date" interactions could be avoided with a 5-10 minute interaction in-person. That could be a grocery store interaction, a bar interaction, a private party one, etc.

The other thing that doesn't help the cause is that social media and swipe apps elevate women's expectations, as @Glassguy describes above. That's natural when you have 300 options on Bumble/Hinge/Instagram at a given time but maybe get approached in real life 5 times in a week in one's day to day routines.

In the dating world today, if you're meeting a woman through social media, swipe apps, or cold approach, it's better to expect the post-date first flake. I like @EyeBRollin's method of no contact after a first date for at least 5 days. That way, you can see which women text you first in those 5 days and have the highest interest.

 

[SW15]

This is so true. Its how people met for centuries. In person is were it is. Its the only real thing.

Technology does not assist. Meeting people when the first interaction is behind a screen is a terrible way to judge if a date is going to be worth a shiit. That's part of why so many men are ghosted after first dates.

 

[Modern Man Advice]

So I got a text out of the blue last week from a girl I had flirted with at this party 3 weeks ago.

After 2-3 exchanges I set a date and we went out last Wednesday.

Thought it went quite well, good laugh, good conversations, banter, etc... and then 30 mins when I got home I got a text from her thanking me for the great evening and hoping I enjoyed it too.

Honestly, nothing made it seem she would fall off the face of the world.

A couple days or so later (yesterday) I sent her a text asking when she was likely to be free next week... no answer.



I haven't sent anything else.

I guess I completely misundertood this.

Welcome to modern dating. Don't overthink this, this happens all the time. Even to the best of us.

That day was simply your turn. Hopefully, you didn't go to a fancy restaurant and paid for everything. If so, there is your answer.

Modern Man Advice

 

[GearsGod310]

Dude Don’t worry about why you got ghosted.
There could be tons of reasons.
Maybe you didn’t do it for her. Maybe she made up with her bf and just needed a night to go out and distract herself that night…

Last friday bangd a chick and haven’t talked to her since man. Bngd the sh1t outta her too. These girls got there out thing going on, Who knows why they go ghost..

what you need to figure out is why you’re worried about it. Thats the problem..

 

[Imarriedawinner71]

So I got a text out of the blue last week from a girl I had flirted with at this party 3 weeks ago.

After 2-3 exchanges I set a date and we went out last Wednesday.

Thought it went quite well, good laugh, good conversations, banter, etc... and then 30 mins when I got home I got a text from her thanking me for the great evening and hoping I enjoyed it too.

Honestly, nothing made it seem she would fall off the face of the world.

A couple days or so later (yesterday) I sent her a text asking when she was likely to be free next week... no answer.



I haven't sent anything else.

I guess I completely misundertood this.

Why don’t you have some patience ,you sound very desperate probably why she dropped off..women can sense neediness.

 

[derby1]

Maybe she made up with her bf and just needed a night to go out and distract herself that night…

This goes on much much more than everyone gives credit for....

not one of them is "single" ....Not one

 

[AttackFormation]

not one of them is "single" ....Not one

I think about this when i see a woman who is past her earliest twenties, but is still on OLD. How could it be possible that she's still single "by chance" at 24 years old (let alone the ages after that)? My intuition tells me it's rather because she has a chronic behavior/psychological pattern as the reason why. I dont want to feel this way as it feels very pessimistic and paranoid, but as of now i cant help but feel skeptical about taking them seriously at that point.

 

[user252009]

Disagree.

Most women have high interest for a very low percentage of men. Lets say the top 15% of men. With OLD and other social connection based platforms, women can get free attention and it makes a 6 think she is a 9. So the 6 will only "date" a 9......In turn that 6 never gets a date because the top % of men commenting on their pics, in their DMs and hitting them up on OLD only want to pump and dump them.

This is mirage that women have in the dating world today.....their value is overly inflated because of the "free" attention they get online.

True, you worded it better

 

[derby1]

I think about this when i see a woman who is past her earliest twenties, but is still on OLD. How could it be possible that she's still single "by chance" at 24 years old (let alone the ages after that)? My intuition tells me it's rather because she has a chronic behavior/psychological pattern as the reason why. I dont want to feel this way as it feels very pessimistic and paranoid, but as of now i cant help but feel skeptical about taking them seriously at that point.

I cant tell you the times Ive had women pursue me, then ghost me as if Im the needy one!

they would tag themselves in their original relationship a week later, he was there all along.

one even said " dont worry I wont scare you off" ......then she had the audacity to vanish lmao