Okay. Now understand what i am about to say is not a rule of law, nor am I telling anyone this is how they should go about their business. I am just making this post so that you can better understand the context in which i mean I don't have a problem with my woman doing something like this.
This is generally how my wife and I operate and it works both ways.
Alot of guys here tka a 10 commandments type stance wheni t comes to rules and bounderies. Meaning, these are my commandments, if you break any of these you have to go. I'm not saying that's even wrong, that's just not how i operate.
This is what we do. I look at our relationship like a ever lasting game of Tug-O-War. I start off at a certain place and this is my line where if i get pulled past this line the relationship is over.
the longer we go, the more good **** she does, the more drama she does not cause, the more of my idea wife/GF she is, the further back I go from the line. sex is good, no drama this month, doesn't bust my balls when I'm locked in a room all day working and not spending time with her, randomly bought me a new pair of shoes she thought i would like (and she was right), she even spent a few hours a few weeks ago taking out every peace of live rock in my 300 gallon fish tank in the living room and scrubbing the algae off of it beucase i didn't have time to do it. didn't' even have to ask her to she just knew i didn't have time. i don't know what i have been doign wrong but the last 2m onths i ahve had algie growing out hte ass in my tank.. that's off the subject, anyway, my point to use a RPG game analogy she earned some ExP points lol.
so now with that in context... she had a few months like this i have taking 5-6 steps back from the line.. if she comes to me and says something like hey some guy thinks i have a great body and thinks i am model material and wants to take pictures of me naked.. do i LIKE it? honestly, not really.. I'm not going to say I'm pissed but I mean, you get what i mean. But she has earned some steps to do things that other women would not get away with, so instead of 5-6 steps back now i'm 2-3 steps back, but i'm still back. if this is how she wants to spend her steps by all means go ahead.
now obviously, using this an logy, there is a line that once you get back to that line we need to figure some **** out. lol she can't be a habitual line stepper; she can't make a habit of doing **** like this. but if i am 5-6 steps back and she wants to do something that might raise an eyebrow, to me she's earned my benefit of the doubt.
she's got some friends in del mar and her and a few of her GF's want to go down there for the weekend next week to visit.. she's earned that without me questioning her whatsoever.
and as stated it works both ways. I do **** sometimes, like talk to the girl that bought me here,, we keep in touch, that most women would not like, but i've earned that in her eyes. Im' a (I think lol) good husband. i respect her, i treat her as my equal, i don't spoil her but the few times she wants something i don't have a problem making her happy, i don't ***** at her everyday for not being as cleanly as i am, i show her attention without showering it to her, it ake her out and still make her feel like i love her and i do. so when i say hey, kat is in town for a day or two we are going to go out for lunch, all i get in return is have fun, bring me back something to eat lol. does she LIKE the fact that i stillt alk to her often? not really lol. but she's not threatened by her and i've earned the right to do **** that i want to do.
this works for me. I have an Alaskan Malamute that i have had since i was 21. he runs this house lol. goes wherever he wants when he wants. we have a doggie door interance in the back door to the patio so he goes out side and just sits there half the day, just sitting in the yard looking at people. he's free to do whatever he wnts to do. i don't keep him on a chain and i don't keep him locked up in the house.
and you know what, it's beucase i don't keep him locked up and i don't keep him in the house, that i am not worried in the east bit about him running off. lol why? why would he go anywhere? he's got it made. versus people who keep their dogs locked up all the time in the house and somehow they get outside and they act like an escaped slave running for freedom lol.
the freeer someone is the happier they are gonna be. the happier they re going to be the better chance ou have of having a good long lasting relationship. the second a person has to start giving up true wishes, just to be in a relationship, that relationship is on a timer from that second on.
that's how i see it. if you dont agree that's cool. but that's my philosophy and it works for me