Getting pissed at a girl for LJBFing me

[VastanVer2.0]

I've ****ed this girl a few times. Both times she was drunk, the first time was the night we met. We've hung out since then, kissed, etc. We had sex again 2-3 weeks after that, she was drunk/high again. Other than that she's been acting like she didn't like me (she'd sometimes talk about other guys, she'd tell me to go pick up a girl, etc).

Two weeks ago she comes over to chill. We're watching a movie and she starts texting me (why I'm not sure since I was sitting beside her). Sends me messages like "I really like you. But I'm shy and can't say it. I'm not used to nice guys but I really like it", and "Would you ever date me?". My response to the first one was to kiss her (we make out). To the second message I said maybe. She got cold after that, asking what's wrong with her. Anyway, that night ended ****ty with her going back to her place after the club.

Last week she again comes over to my place. She's acting kind of weird. I'd try to kiss her and get little response (she wouldn't reject it but wouldn't really kiss me back). She's cuddle with me, let me rub her leg, and she'd be rubbing me. Try to escalate and she tells me to stop. Eventually she calls some guy she met recently to pick her up. Before he got there we were playing around, I pin her down on my bed, start kissing her chest, she starts moaning but quickly tells me to stop. The guy gets there at that point so she leaves.

Since then we've talked over fb a few times (she lost her phone a couple of weeks ago). Basically she said she wants to be friends. I agreed to it at the time. But today I realized that's not what I want, so sent her a message saying that I didn't want to be just friends with her and it's my bad that I wasn't straight with her the first time (delete her from fb for good measure). She sends me back a message asking why I'm acting this way (and tries to add me back to fb). We send a bunch of messages back and forth, with the gist of it being that she just wants to be friends and if I don't like it then too bad. Then she asks me to be friends again. I said no, she says I'm ****ed.

I'm so pissed at this girl. I'm not even sure what the cause of this is either. I know I like her but this is ridiculous. I know I'm in the right for not wanting to be her friend too. Still I want to make sure I'm right here.

 

[Marvin Gaye]

Two weeks ago she comes over to chill. We're watching a movie and she starts texting me (why I'm not sure since I was sitting beside her). Sends me messages like "I really like you. But I'm shy and can't say it. I'm not used to nice guys but I really like it", and "Would you ever date me?". My response to the first one was to kiss her (we make out). To the second message I said maybe. She got cold after that, asking what's wrong with her. Anyway, that night ended ****ty with her going back to her place after the club..

WHAT lmao. I would have laughed sqaure in her face. But she called you a nice guy so maybe she expected you to do something 'romantic' like kissing her after she does some dumbass stuff. Also I'm assuming by high you mean smoking dank nuggs with you, and not popping pills or anything right? Either way she doesn't seem like a great quality girl, who gives a fvck if she LBJF'd you? Cmon Vastan you care about this girl way too much.

She called you a nice guy?! Disrespect. Hope all goes well with this one, I'm not saying drop her completely but she doesn't seem like the respectful type, try concerning yourself with other girls.

 

[VastanVer2.0]

WHAT lmao. I would have laughed sqaure in her face. But she called you a nice guy so maybe she expected you to do something 'romantic' like kissing her after she does some dumbass stuff. Also I'm assuming by high you mean smoking dank nuggs with you, and not popping pills or anything right? Either way she doesn't seem like a great quality girl, who gives a fvck if she LBJF'd you? Cmon Vastan you care about this girl way too much.

She called you a nice guy?! Disrespect. Hope all goes well with this one, I'm not saying drop her completely but she doesn't seem like the respectful type, try concerning yourself with other girls.

Yeah thought it was ridiculous too. I don't find her calling me a nice guy to be the most disrespectful thing, her calling some guy to come pick her up was (she probably ****ed him too).

 

[VastanVer2.0]

Well I decided to maybe be friends with her. However it will be on my conditions, and it won't be til I meet a new girl that interested in me. Like they say, the best way to get over someone is to get under someone else.

 

[scribblec]

Well I decided to maybe be friends with her. However it will be on my conditions, and it won't be til I meet a new girl that interested in me. Like they say, the best way to get over someone is to get under someone else.

man did u not even bother to read the above posts??

 

[VastanVer2.0]

man did u not even bother to read the above posts??

You mean the one post? The one I already commented on.

 

[runner83]

When a girl LJBF's you she is saying (but not in those words) that she is not attracted to you as a man.

Do not put up with this disrespect, but do not call her out on it either.

Your actions after this were all wrong and highlighted to her your neediness and lack of options, therefore pushing her away even more.

Better response would have been indifference and moving on with your life. She would have wondered why you took it easily, are you seeing other chicks etc etc and maybe come crawling back.

Learn for next time and move on

 

[Mike32ct]

I've ****ed this girl a few times. Both times she was drunk, the first time was the night we met. We've hung out since then, kissed, etc. We had sex again 2-3 weeks after that, she was drunk/high again. Other than that she's been acting like she didn't like me (she'd sometimes talk about other guys, she'd tell me to go pick up a girl, etc).

Two weeks ago she comes over to chill. We're watching a movie and she starts texting me (why I'm not sure since I was sitting beside her). Sends me messages like "I really like you. But I'm shy and can't say it. I'm not used to nice guysbut I really like it" , and "Would you ever date me?". My response to the first one was to kiss her (we make out). To the second message I said maybe. She got cold after that, asking what's wrong with her. Anyway, that night ended ****ty with her going back to her place after the club.

Last week she again comes over to my place. She's acting kind of weird. I'd try to kiss her and get little response (she wouldn't reject it but wouldn't really kiss me back). She's cuddle with me, let me rub her leg, and she'd be rubbing me. Try to escalate and she tells me to stop. Eventually she calls some guy she met recently to pick her up. Before he got there we were playing around, I pin her down on my bed, start kissing her chest, she starts moaning but quickly tells me to stop. The guy gets there at that point so she leaves.

Since then we've talked over fb a few times (she lost her phone a couple of weeks ago). Basically she said she wants to be friends. I agreed to it at the time. But today I realized that's not what I want, so sent her a message saying that I didn't want to be just friends with her and it's my bad that I wasn't straight with her the first time (delete her from fb for good measure). She sends me back a message asking why I'm acting this way (and tries to add me back to fb). We send a bunch of messages back and forth, with the gist of it being that she just wants to be friends and if I don't like it then too bad. Then she asks me to be friends again. I said no, she says I'm ****ed.

I'm so pissed at this girl. I'm not even sure what the cause of this is either. I know I like her but this is ridiculous. I know I'm in the right for not wanting to be her friend too. Still I want to make sure I'm right here.

I bolded the red flag piece.

"I'm not used to nice guys, but I like it." = "I'm used to f*cking jerks. Once in a while, I find nice guys slightly appealing because they are a breath of fresh air. But I will quickly miss the abuse and dump them because they aren't as exciting as the bad boy."

Sadly, you were on borrowed time to begin with because she saw you as a nice guy, which is not the type of guy she typically goes for.

I think you were right to not agree to be friends with her. At BEST, she might be ok social proof when you go out clubbing. But that assumes that you meet girls there on your own (outside of her circle). She's not going to lift a finger to help you get girls. In fact, she may inadvertantly sabotage your efforts in her social circle by dropping to her girlfriends that "You two dated briefly, but it didn't work out. But you're a really nice guy." Will her gfs want to jump your bones after hearing that? No.

The good news is you did f*ck her. Take the success and the confidence associated with it and use it to get another girl.

 

[VastanVer2.0]

I bolded the red flag piece.

"I'm not used to nice guys, but I like it." = "I'm used to f*cking jerks. Once in a while, I find nice guys slightly appealing because they are a breath of fresh air. But I will quickly miss the abuse and dump them because they aren't as exciting as the bad boy."

Sadly, you were on borrowed time to begin with because she saw you as a nice guy, which is not the type of guy she typically goes for.

I think you were right to not agree to be friends with her. At BEST, she might be ok social proof when you go out clubbing. But that assumes that you meet girls there on your own (outside of her circle). She's not going to lift a finger to help you get girls. In fact, she may inadvertantly sabotage your efforts in her social circle by dropping to her girlfriends that "You two dated briefly, but it didn't work out. But you're a really nice guy." Will her gfs want to jump your bones after hearing that? No.

The good news is you did f*ck her. Take the success and the confidence associated with it and use it to get another girl.

Well could take a while to find another girl. I don't often get girls. It could take weeks or months to find a girl that likes me. But whatever, I'm decent looking so eventually it'll happen.

Only thing is I accepted her friend request. Should I just remove her from it without saying anything?

 

[Mike32ct]

Well could take a while to find another girl. I don't often get girls. It could take weeks or months to find a girl that likes me. But whatever, I'm decent looking so eventually it'll happen.

I have quite a bit of "nice guy" in me too, so I sometimes have lengthy dry spells with no girls. However, believe me, if a decent looking girl f*cked you on the first night, you got decent looks at a minimum. Women are toughest on looks when it comes to ONS'. But, friend or no friend, the well is dried up with this one. You'll find some new p*ss. Hang in there bro.

Only thing is I accepted her friend request. Should I just remove her from it without saying anything?

Let me put it this way. We've established that she only wants to be friends. Are you ok JUST being her friend? In other words, with no hidden agenda. If you only wanted something physical/romantic with her, then remove her a*s.

I have two female friends that I genuinely LIKE as people. I have ZERO desire to hook up with either of them. Likewise, they don't help me get girls. I don't seek such help from them either. I'm just friends with them because I like to shoot the sh*t with them from time to time. If you are ok with that kind of arrangement, fine. Otherwise remove her so she's not a drain on your confidence.

 

[runner83]

Well could take a while to find another girl. I don't often get girls. It could take weeks or months to find a girl that likes me. But whatever, I'm decent looking so eventually it'll happen.

Only thing is I accepted her friend request. Should I just remove her from it without saying anything?

No, keep her on there and use it to your advantage.

DO NOT get into the trap of msg'ing with her online. Avoid it at all costs!

Get some pics of yourself with a hot girl or two (at a club). post the pics and if she or anyone asks who it is, be evasive.

Use competition anxiety to your advantage.

Women want a man who is wanted by other women. Even if this isn't you at this point in time, always cultivate this image.

 

[VastanVer2.0]

I have quite a bit of "nice guy" in me too, so I sometimes have lengthy dry spells with no girls. However, believe me, if a decent looking girl f*cked you on the first night, you got decent looks at a minimum. Women are toughest on looks when it comes to ONS'. But, friend or no friend, the well is dried up with this one. You'll find some new p*ss. Hang in there bro.

I don't necessarily have dry spells because I'm a nice guy, more because I suck with women and I don't have the patience to get good at this. I easily get discouraged and keep taking breaks. I do meet girls but I usually **** up with them before evening meeting up with them again. So occasionally I meet a girl that's willing to put up with my **** ups (probably because I'm good looking). Put it this way, before this girl in question the last 2 girls I ****ed were at the end of Dec. One of those I started ****ing at the start of Dec and the other was a 1 time thing. And before Dec it had been almost 3 years since I had sex.

Anyway, so far it's 1 for deleting her and 1 against. I'm still on the fence so hoping other people will give their opinion.

 

[Tiguere]

When a girl LJBF's you she is saying (but not in those words) that she is not attracted to you as a man.

Do not put up with this disrespect, but do not call her out on it either.

Your actions after this were all wrong and highlighted to her your neediness and lack of options, therefore pushing her away even more.

Better response would have been indifference and moving on with your life. She would have wondered why you took it easily, are you seeing other chicks etc etc and maybe come crawling back.

Learn for next time and move on

umm attraction is not a choice. so you calling a girl LJBfriending a guy isnt disrespect. calling disrespect is an ego problem. if a girl who i like LJBF me ill wish her luck and keep on trucking. no need to call it disrespect/diss/insult.

 

[runner83]

umm attraction is not a choice. so you calling a girl LJBfriending a guy isnt disrespect. calling disrespect is an ego problem. if a girl who i like LJBF me ill wish her luck and keep on trucking. no need to call it disrespect/diss/insult.

Agreed brah, attraction is not a choice. And I did say not to call her out on it, indifference is much better.

What I meant was:

- Her not being attracted to you is not disrespect, she can't help how she feels

- But what IS disrespect is the girl asking to LJBF's and trying to keep you around for her own ego boosting purposes while deluding herself that she is actually doing it for your sake.

Don't fall for it.