Game development // approach log

[FinallyAlpha]

21/52

I reached a new peak weight this week and a PT friend at the gym asked was I on steroids. I was pretty happy with that. I'm using an app to count calories to make sure I'm hitting a surplus each day.

I'm also kind of beginning to notice some cuties at the gym giving me smiles here and there. For example, one day this week, I had three fleeting interactions with girls at the gym. One asked me was I done on a machine. And two others I shared the leg curl machine with. One of the girls on the leg curl (a solid 8), didn't know how to use it and I helped her adjust it for a set. The other girl from the the leg curl was... I mean... she made me wince when I saw her. The most important factor here is that I was on a two day no fap run, so I was keenly noticing the girls in the gym. The one who made me wince was... I mean... fvck... just my type in terms of body type. Literally the ideal woman I would want to be locked in a room with. But, anyway, she just glanced up at me with a little 'thanks' when I finished my set and she jumped on.

I was fvcking floating on air when I left the gym; it was truly remarkable. It was like a drug was teeming through my body. I was almost running down the street. When I arrived at the café to pick up my morning coffee, I was very uncharacteristically chatting and laughing with the barista girls.

Whatever happened during that leg workout had altered something.

So there is the compounding effect of my hard work (diet, sleep, training), where I am bigger, stronger, have a more attractive body, and therefore I feel more embodied and confident. Plus, perhaps, being sexually active with an attractive woman (rather than having been relying on masturbation for sexual relief). Combine that with then being in the gym, grinding out a juicy leg workout (i.e I'm there to work, not fvck around). And then the little bit of interaction with young, attractive women. (I wanted to say 'validation' but I can't claim that my interactions with them were strong indications of interest or anything like that.)

All-in-all, an interesting and encouraging set of experiences.

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This week will be the first in a while (maybe 6 or 7 weeks) where I don't do 5 workouts. I have had to settle with 4 this week as I hurt my shoulder doing heavy shrugs. It feels better after some rest and I'll attempt a chest session tomorrow. If it's not up to it though, I will lift very light all next week if I have to. I won't risk a stupid injury out of impatience. It's a long road ahead.

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I have been with the girl from my last post twice since. The sex is good and so is the vibe.

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I've been enjoying other forum posts, especially the one on porn use along with others. I think frequently perusing the forums here has been generally good for me, as it reminds me of some of the potential pitfalls in a man's life and how to try and live better.

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I have gone on a couple of fap binges over the past 7 days. Life certainly feels a lot more fun and interesting when I don't fap. But depending on where my physical and mental energy is at, sometimes it's all too easy to knock one - or 4 - out.

Ideally honestly I would like to have a fap bet in place where I had to pay a financial penalty to someone every time I did it. But (1) people find that too intimate / embarrassing / gross and (2) it would be based on a code of honor, of course, as the person would have to trust me to tell them each time.

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Feeling pretty flat right now as I've had a dirty dose of the sh1ts since yesterday afternoon. I have been slamming rehydration solution but my body doesn't seem to have flushed out whatever is bothering it. I also can't exactly pinpoint what it was. I think it may have been a dodgy tub of yogurt :/

Anyway... here's to being the best version of ourselves next week. Good luck all.

 

[FinallyAlpha]

22/52

No fap this week. I made a bet with a friend that will last for two months that I can only fap max once per week (the once per week is like a psychological safety net). And I haven't done it. I haven't had a point this week where I've been very tempted to cave in and fap.

I also made a couple of productivity bets and that has led to this week being my most productive week in work in a while. I needed that, as I do find it is easy to slip and become complacent and for time to just coast by.

Five more workouts in the books. I recovered from my stomach issues and my weight seems solid (although I am actively trying to gain another 10kg at least). I want to be big. Staying consistent with the calories is the main thing.

With no fap, I am noticing women a lot. I see several women every day who I find sexually attractive and that gives me a rush. But I'm not acting on that right now (be it through fapping, going out chasing or setting dates with plates or OLD) and that's great. I'm enjoying some time on the grind and building myself up.

I must admit, when I do see so many attractive women around, or when I see couples with a normal guy (or even sometimes sloppy guy) and a sexy girl, or--and this is the toughest one--when I see guys running game, approaching and picking up chicks, I do get a sense of dread. Like I'm missing out or I'm wasting my time or 'that should be me'. And that can sometimes lead to some dark thoughts.

But that's fine. It's not my time right now. My time will come. There are a couple of other priorities that need to be dealt with first. And I'm working hard to deal with them. For example, I'm just not as financially stable as I would ideally like to be. So I have to sacrifice, stay consistent and work hard to earn that and get there. When I'm more established, I'll be in a better position to incorporate more balance into my life and doing more of what I enjoy. But that costs money. And that's just reality.

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I was around the girl I have most recently been seeing earlier this week, and with no fap, I thought I would be tactile and flirty with her. But I was quite controlled, which was a state that I enjoyed. I enjoy spending time with her, and she still seems interested, so I will set up a day off with her next week.

But in the meantime, as horny as I do often feel, I'm not craving anything right now and I am quite focused.

 

[SW15]

I did skim through a lot of posts and it's good you are journaling on your progress and the way that you feel.

Wedding game
I'm attending a friend's wedding soon.

Any specific tips on wedding game?

Weddings are mostly shiit places now in my experience to meet women in my experience. In considering weddings 2010-present, the case is that people get married much later in life now. It is true that people are staying unmarried later into life. At 2010 and later weddings, the typical 27-33 year old wedding attendee is coming to the wedding with their significant other. A decline in marriage rates does not equate into a decline in couplehood.

My closest friend got married in 2017 and there were 100+ attendees. How many unattached women attended that wedding? 0. The marrying couple were 28 and 29 at the time of the wedding, meaning their social circle of 27-33 year olds were all in various stages of committed couplehood. There would be 0 single women looking for a man. Few unattached men showed up because the unattached men knew that there would be 0 unattached women showing up. Some other weddings in my social circle were similar to that in terms of unattached women.

If social circles lead to relationships, people are introduced well before a wedding reception.

The only time that a wedding reception could lead to a blossoming romance is if a couple gets married early in life and most of their social circle is still too young to have attachments. That type of wedding is getting less common.

According to 2016 data points on newlyweds then, 19% of weddings involved guests having sex as a result of interacting at the wedding receptions.

https://www.theknot.com/content/wedding-guest-hookups

 

[FinallyAlpha]

Weddings

https://www.theknot.com/content/wedding-guest-hookups

Yes, valid points on wedding game. Although I had a lot of fun at those two weddings during the summer, I was excited to game at them and that ended up being a damp squib. I emphasized the game aspect too much in my mind.

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23/52

Hello men. Another solid week. My efforts to be the best version of myself met my acceptable standards. And that's all I can ask for, each week. When we fall short, we own up to it. And when we meet our standards, we can acknowledge that, identify areas for improvement, and march on. That's a man's life, isn't it. There's no destination. There are milestones. But we grind and that's it. It's beautiful in a way.

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I haven't masturbated in two weeks. With thanks to the bet discussed in my last post. There are definitely moments when I'm frustrated and tired. And I'm still a hound for pusspuss. But this is a resolution now that I channel that energy in a certain direction.

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I spent a sweet day off hanging out with the girl I'm seeing. I fvcked her so good that she was writhing in pain after. (We both climaxed at the same time during the sex.) I was a bit taken aback and asked was she ok. She said she was great, that she can't complain, and that her insides were in pain. Thank the 'no fap', I guess.

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There's a PT at my gym who has a very alpha approach to his work. He has a rotation of exclusively young, hot girls that he trains. It's quite something to behold. His GF is a 9+ on a conventional scale. And then he's just constantly surrounded by hotties. Seems like a cool guy. Kudos to him. Makes me think of the manosphere concept of social proof.

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I pvssied out of a grocery store approach during the week. It was primed there, ready to go. And I choked.

Before leaving my home for the store, I made sure to freshen up in order to look good. And in the store, there she was, an ideal target, an attractive woman who I would have liked to have gotten to know.

I circled around the aisles to try to engineer a spontaneous meeting, and I got one. And she gave me a nice, big dose of eye contact. All I could do was crack a smile (feel self conscious about that), brush off the shelf causing an item to drop, and continue walking by her. Just choked the spot.

This is fundamentally linked to where I see myself in my life right now. I grind like a motherfvcker, I always feel like I can be doing more, I'm obsessed with the gym and optimizing my life around that, I don't drink (I think it's been a month now). I also have some apartment shame. I like my apartment and it's in the center of a great city. But it's not baller. And I want to live in a nice place. I've fvcked plenty of girls here, but there's some idea I have where I want to move to a place where I can bring girls back to and chill (my current place isn't awesome for that). The apartment thing is probably some irrational BS; but the point is that I actively want to move to a nice place in the coming months. That is the next important progress marker for me in my journey.

The other important thing is money. I don't have a lot of it. I'm fine with where I'm at in my career right now, it's going well and I have good prospects. But I want to have options for places that I can go on dates with women. For more extravagant things I can do.

Again though, as I write this, it sounds like BS excuses. I guess there will always be excuses sloshing around in our heads trying to protect us from rejection. Interesting thought.

I'm so obsessively on my grind right now that gaming and approaching isn't super interesting to me. But I also want to fvck hot women. So there's that. Again, I need to be honest with myself about the excuses I'm making not to approach.

 

[FinallyAlpha]

24/52

It’s steady as she goes in my life this week, so I want to share a couple of cautionary tales about shameful simping I committed last year before resolving to adopt a more red pilled way of life.

Brace yourselves.

The Beta-Hunting MILF
When I moved to my current city last year, it was immediately post-pandemic, post-lockdowns and I was a thirsty, thirsty boy. I was actively dating and fvcking anything that moved. I was active on OLD and had some IRL success too.

I OLD matched a seemingly attractive, career-driven woman. Now, in my defence, she may not have had her age on her profile, IDK. But let’s assume she did. She was 38. (I’m younger than that.) one or two of her photos were her competing at some bikini pageant. She was blonde and had a good body.

I was taking a day off and jonesing for some (what I now understand to be) SIMPINGGG. I messaged her and said I wanted to go to a day club (swimming pool, party vibes, day drinking and food.) and invited her along. I met her at the place and was pleased with her appearance. It matched exactly her photos. She was hot. Blonde. Clearly in shape. Possibly the nicest fake tatties I have seen (or tasted, as we’ll come on to).

We spent hours eating well and gradually getting drunk at this place. In and out of the pool. Was a very, very good date. Conversation was good; talk about how she’s a single mom etc. Eventually we start making out. There are lots of people around also spending the day there, also drinking and hanging out.

As the sun goes down, we’re in the pool, kissing, rubbing against each other. And boom, she puts her hand in my trunks and starts playing with my c0ck. I’m like: oh… kay…

Now, this is a fairly small pool. There are plenty of others in it. And there are lights in the water, so there’s nothing you can’t see. And she’s just tugging my d1ck, having a good time. She then assertively instructs me to start playing with her puss.

Anyway, we fool around. I propose fvcking in the toilets. She says no way, as if she’s that much of a h0e…

We leave the place. All on my dime.

(If you ask me now, I don’t regret that date. It was a great time and a cool memory. I suppose the largest simping infraction for me was how big of a spend it was for me at the time. And to drop it on a first OLD date was nothing short of retarded behaviour.)

That was the point the fvckery began on her side. She’s obviously horny as we say goodnight and says she will go home, relieve the nanny and put her kid to bed, she then wants me to come over so we can fool around in her pool. I’m fully game, of course. I go home and await her text for me to head to her place. She texts flaking. Fine.

I can’t remember who was initiating follow ups but we ended up seeing each other maybe 4 or 5 times in the ensuing 10 days (SIMP). Second date, I bought her breakfast and we hung at her pool. Third date, I brought her to an awesome lunch spot, on my dime of course (SIMP). After one of these dates, in her pool, I stuck my peen in her mouth and went down on her. Still no penetratióne. I was becoming a little impatient at this point. She brought me into her home and—Sweet Suffering Baby Jesus—the place was fvcked. Her kid daughter had the run of the place. Evidently, no-one was cleaning. There were toys and random sh1t strewn everywhere. There was this agitated child at home all the time while her mother went out every day cavorting around town.

By, say, the fourth meeting, the penny finally dropped in my then-SIMP head that I was being played. She initiated a date at one of the most exclusive places in town. I turned up and just sulked like a b1tch and told her I wasn’t going to continue doing this. We split the bill.

Soon after, she messaged inviting me over to stay the night at her place. To finally fvck. She flaked very—and I mean very—last minute. I was p1ssed and told her I didn’t want to see her any more.

The morals of this story are, I hope self evident. I got played by a single mother who was actively hunting for a beta simp to take over fathering duties of her troubled child. She explicitly alluded to as much on our dates. A short while after I nexted her, I saw her on a lunch date. She was just playing the field. I'm sure some other dude got to pipe it; but she was quite something. And there I was, down a nice chunk of change and frustrated by the experience.

I didn’t need the red pill for me to immediately deduce some important lessons from this experience. But subsequently discovering this community has helped to crystalize them in my consciousness.

Next week, if there’s not much going on, I’ll relay another harrowing tale of simping from the same period.

 

[FinallyAlpha]

25/52

Hello, men.

I have precisely nothing to update on this week. Intensity and consistency at work is what is taking most, if not all, of my focus and energy. And I am enjoying that. The feedback that I am receiving for my efforts (in the form of small successes here and there) is encouraging and it is about allowing those successes to compound through... more consistency.

I wish you all a strong week and if anything interesting or exciting happens with me, I will make sure to include in my next post.

 

[FinallyAlpha]

26/52

Exact same story this week. Blissfully uneventful. Work is savagely consistent. I'm giving it my all at the moment and, again, the compounding nature of the daily efforts is starting to produce some little glimmers. Just trying to best myself each day.

I spent one day off with the girl I'm seeing. I take one day each week where I fully power down and focus on nothing. I ate out three times in one day and spent the remainder fvcking in my bed. A day like that is about as much 'celebration' or extravagance as I could ask for and gives me ample fuel to get back at it when it's time to work again.

More consistency next week. Building. That's it for now. Building and focusing on the aggregation of marginal gains.

 

[FinallyAlpha]

27/52

Same idea this week. It was a remarkably positive week at work.

I am determined to continue this type of sprint - with the current structure that my week's have - until the end of the year. When I arrive to that point and I have remained consistent, I will reward myself with a week off to spend with family and friends.

I have strong momentum at work at the moment and I am trying to seize it and capitalize on it. This is the foundation upon which my entire life is built. Without it, there is no concept of Game, or personal growth, or being one's best self or fulfilling lifelong ambitions. So it will be the same approach this week, and every week until the end of the year, at least, when I will take stock.

 

[FinallyAlpha]

28/52

If it hasn't already, this is going to quickly become repetitive and boring. Refreshingly so, for me. I'm somewhat conflicted between leaving this thread be for the time being and honoring the commitment to myself to post every week for one year. Even if I feel that I don't have a lot to say.

This is because the emphasis in my life has shifted strongly away from trying to fvck a lot of women to trying to be excellent; in my work, and in the gym. For me excellence is simply consistency. Because I already possess a healthy dose of self-reflection and introspection. Therefore, as long as I retain good mentors, constantly improving is not a huge struggle. The challenge is consistent application day in, day out, week in, week out. That hasn't been a struggle for me of late and I am enjoying it immensely. Therefore this thread (given its title and its intention) becomes somewhat boring.

However, I think that self-growth and self-mastery are intrinsic to good Game. And also, perhaps, the thread has simply evolved to encompass more my journey of professional and physical growth.

Romantically I've been seeing one girl (same girl since post 20/52) fairly casually. And it's been good. I'm certainly not in a rush for exclusivity or anything like that. And we're enjoying each other's company when we're together.

Otherwise, I wish you all a strong and fulfilling week ahead.

 

[FinallyAlpha]

29/52

Last week was a big week of work. Attritional, is how I would describe my last week. It was just fvcking hard. Was kept up all night one night having to remove a door frame with my bare hands because it had termites. Messed up my sleep and my rhythm, and therefore my ability to recover and perform. Then my neighbor is doing remodeling work, drilling against my wall. Literally drilling. With a drill... a power tool. What else is wrong? Ummm... my internet service sucks coke. And a key service provider that helps me make money (which I orient so much of how I do my work around) completely changed how they provide their service, which therefore means I had to, on the fly, completely change my approach to my work and how I can make money.

Cool. Just real life sh1t. Is what it is. It just makes me think how so much of what we want to be within our control is actually completely out of our control and those among us who win are those who are willing to face head winds... head on... and grind on and make it fvcking work, no matter what. It's way too easy to be salty and resentful in these moments.

Also makes me think how good it feels when things are going well. Last month went well; no crazy sh1t happened like the above. And it felt like everything was within my control. And it was like a fvcking drug; like ecstasy. Just being able to focus on the good sh1t and not being distracted by bullsh1t.

Anyway, this is probably a post for grind.com (?) and not sosuave, but hey, here we are.

Pvssy is so fvcking secondary and boring compared to this. Compared to fighting for your life every day to try and survive and make it work. But I still like and need pvssy. What a conundrum.

 

[FinallyAlpha]

30/52

Still out here grinding. Obsessed with work. There's really not a whole lot else going on. I have a cool thing going with one girl who hangs with me on my day off. I have a 2-3 friends who I see in the gym or for dinner every now and then. I have a couple of mentors who are helping to keep me on the right track. And I will travel to see my family during the festive season. I'm also trying to focus on calories and lifting; I have remained consistent with attending the gym, but I fell off with calories and lost a couple of lbs.

 

[FinallyAlpha]

31/51

Nothing to say. Just fire fighting constantly and trying to swerve burnout. Hope you're all doing well.

 

[FinallyAlpha]

Update...

• Late-2022 was hard; just in survival mode, working
• Was dating 1 girl during that time. Great experience.
• Moved country beginning 2023. Ended it with girl.
• Had to grind hard at work for first 2 months in new country. Life was very unbalanced.
• But now I'm in a great place. Have weekends and nights for me. Finances are secure. Ready to fvcking go!

Currently on a 2.5 month dry spell! No play. Nada.

So I've made my way back to the church of SS.

I will post approaches as individual threads in the forum so as to get more input on honing my game.

I'll use this thread for riffs on anything else game related that I find interesting.

 

[FinallyAlpha]

I fvcked an Uber driver last night.

She drove me home Thursday night, we exchanged numbers and she came over last night. I put something on Netflix and we fvcked.

It was kind of boring as she was older and unattractive. But the nut was definitely cathartic given the drought.

 

[FinallyAlpha]

Life update...

TL;DR: I've embraced semen retention and started praying daily. My lease is up in August and I want to move because I don't like my current city and apartment. My motivation to date or involve myself with women at all until that time is extremely low.

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As mentioned, I moved to a new country in late-January 2023.

I spent two months focusing on work and weight training. I last drank alcohol 139 days ago.

As documented on the forum, I had an urge to date in April. I got one fvck, two dates, and maybe four or five failed dates / flakes.

I am grateful to everyone who wrote back to those threads. I do feel it gave me some good material for improvement.

I am not enjoying the place that I'm living in. It's a studio on the outskirts of a pretty nice city. The city is beautiful and touristy, but I'm just not feeling it. The scene here is based around booze, and is otherwise quite traditional. I'm into more wavy, esoteric activities, and I know places I can go where I am happier.

I'm starting to realise that I'm somewhat reclusive by nature. I often don't derive a lot of joy from the presence of others. Conversely, I never feel lonely when I'm alone. But I do sometimes get a sense that my life is... zestless.

I stumbled upon videos about semen retention one or two weeks ago, and I found the general idea interesting. I was masturbating habitually, and I found that my energy was generally low, and I wasn't very engaged or driven in my daily activities. Semen retention makes sense to me as a philosophy. Rather than 'no fap' which suggests resisting an enticing vice, SR is aspirational in that you are proactively choosing to do something that gives you more energy, makes you more attractive, and prioritises you being the best version of yourself.

I am also interested in a spiritual component to an overall life philosophy. So I've been getting on my knees and praying to God, resolving to be humble, grateful, and patient in my daily activities. That is a useful and powerful message, for me personally.

I have been on a bulk since February and I have gone from ~99kg / 218lbs to 113kg / 249lbs true (post-piss, morning) body weight. My weight training has been good; high intensity and very consistent. I'm a lot stronger, and slowly but surely getting bigger. I'm aiming to get to 120kg / 264lbs and then entering an equally focused cut. I'll check in on that around mid-June. I'm around 6'6'' / 2m in height, for context.

My mind is currently very focused on the next 2.5 months to get my money right and smash my work goals so that I have attractive living options when autumn rolls around.

I have not given up on Game. On the contrary, I am more excited about it now than ever before.

 

[FinallyAlpha]

Sup

280 days since drinking alcohol.

I moved city, to a place that suits me better. I have solid friends here with similar interests and values; the scene for women is excellent; and I leased a great apartment in a great location. I'm able to pursue the type of life I want. Last year, I was in survival mode at work and in my finances. Now I have strong job security and earning potential.

Anyway, I won't bore you further. Let's dive into some game / sex / seduction stuff.

Between February - September (7 months), I had sex 3 times, with 3 different women. Two unattractive and one pretty wild / hot. I documented those experiences previously on the forum. So, overall a very dry patch. It was a period of settling into a new job, working hard, and avoiding distractions. It was hard, but worth it.

Since relocating in September, I have been with 3 women. I fvcked both of the reception girls (one morning shift; one night shift) at the apartment building that I was temporarily staying in when I arrived. The first one (23 y.o.), I was genuinely turned on by. The second one (32-33 y.o.) I wanted more as a side mission to complete the game.

The third woman is my ex. We've fvcked 3 times since I got back. She was / is pretty thirsty for me, and I'm not attracted to her anymore.

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I have a 40 approaches bet for October with a friend.

One night last week, we both went out to do 10 each. It was a fun experience. Most were whatever exchanges, and some were great. One girl was hot and was out walking with her mom. She was very receptive to me. Unfortunately she was leaving town the next day. But we texted for a while, and maybe she'll come back one day.

Another girl (21 y.o.) gave me strong choosing signals as she was walking by. I subsequently went on a date with her. But her personality and energy was innocent and immature, not my thing. So I called it after a couple of hours (I haven't followed up with her, and nor has she with me). As I was walking away from that date, I stopped a girl (23 y.o. iirc) with a fire body in the street. I brought her to a bar / club, and I escalated hard. I was spitting flames at the end of it. But she didn't come home with me / take me home.

Weirdly, I didn't follow up with her either. When the dust settled, I just figured I wasn't that into her. I bumped into her on the street today and it was cordial.

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1/40 October approaches today. (I haven't fapped for probably over a week, so I'm quite locked in on the need to approach. I don't have or use OLD.)

During leg day at the gym, I noticed a girl training in the studio while I was warming up and squatting.

At the end of my workout (max testosterone flow), I saw her still over on a mat. I wanted to do core but needed accountability. I approached; she was putting her mat away. I asked "do you know any good core workouts." "no." "I need to do a core routine but my friend isn't here to force me to do it. So I need you to not let me quit and call me a pvssy if I do." "ok" And she sat there and acted as my PR for this core workout. The whole exchange was fun and she was clearly engaged. She took my number and messaged me there and then.

My first ever serious gym approach.

I messaged her 30 minutes later when I was at home saying I wanted to see her tonight. She wrote back that she can't.

I'm trying to operate quite 'mode one'. (While in the gym, I said I could give her a massage as payment for her help, I complemented her eyes, I said I wanted her to come to my place.) But, when using that strategy, how do we manage 'coming off as thirsty / desperate'?

 

[Ricky]

Great job on the no alcohol. I am on day 2… sober October

With regards to your approach. i like direct mode to a degree but i also like to keep women guessing by sending mixed signals… basically using the same tricks women do on us to them