FR from last night: Need advice and opinions

Zero123

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I had a really long post and it got lost somehow after I post it (I'm kinda pissed...) so I'll keep this one as a short summary.

Me and my friend went sarging last night at a bunch of bars and clubs, heres what we experienced:

First bar we went to, got there early and the male:female ratio was like 90/10. There were pratically no single women in there other than a random group of fatties. We left.

Next bar, the ratio was more like 60/40, pretty good compared to the last bar. We walk in all pimped out and fitted up seeing if we can get some girls checking us out as we strolled in. Didn't work we were pratically invisble. We noticed a big group of (what appeared to be) single women we we casually walk up to a empty spot between them but made sure we ignored them completely and flagged down the bartender. The group of girls got up and left as soon as we sat down. I don't know what the fvck was up with that. Anyway there was still a group of 2 girls to our right so we grabbed a drink, made sure they were there by themselves and approached them. We introduce ourselves and they turned into bytch mode. Kinda trying to ignore us and not look at us, then her friend said something along the lines of "we are lesbian, leave us alone" (which was not true, they were looking at guys and hitting on the bartender earlier). We tried to neg them in a funny way to stay in the conversation but they weren't having it and basically told us to get the fvck away from them. Then some random captian save-a-ho guy out of no where grab me and told me the ladies arent interested and to go away. I almost knocked him out right there but I wasn't trying to start shyt and end up in jail. The only way not to look like a ***** in that situation was to push him off of me so we just bailed on that set completely.

That was just one particular example but we basically crashed and burned all night with girls acting like stuck up bytches not wanting to even let us say hello and introduce ourselves. I didn't really see anybody else apporaching these girls like me and my friend did so I don't know what the deal was. We are very new to sarging and we are trying to get in the game but obviously we don't know what the fvck we are doing if we can't get past introducing ourselves. I know women have bytch shields that need to be brought down but shyt do we need to get into fights trying to bring that shyt down (like in the captian save-a-ho example)? How do you bring down bytch shields when women aren't even giving you the time of day?

BTW, both me and my friend are average to maybe a little above average looking. We both dress really nice and wear expensive clothes. We are both also in excellent shape.
 

kingy

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screen women like that out. go in with something cheeky funny and if she doesnt respond then plow for a little bit if still nothing hits then i personally wouldnt bother.

in your case you demonstrated low value unfortunately, as youve both walked in and introduced yourselves and been direct and then she said leave us alone you have little room to calibrate as youve already telegraphed interest. if your indirect then you can punish bad behaviour and build social value in front of her.

direct you are just screening girls straight off the bat, and then move on if they arent.

in your case "call them on their ****ty behaviour" for instance.

"where i came from people were raised with a few manours" this will raise your value showing that you are a man and dont take ****, if she is still we are talking leave us alone then just leave :)
 

Zero123

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Captain said:
You probably need to do a better job of catching their attention initially, and making them interested in having you around from the start. What kind of things were you opening with?
Well how do we catch thier attention initially if we get shut out right away? Or do you mean catch their attention before the approach? Sometimes we opened just by saying hi and introducing ourselves and sometimes we'd open by asking them a random question about us, themselves, or the bar. Kinda situation on whatever was happening at the time.
 

Zero123

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kingy said:
screen women like that out. go in with something cheeky funny and if she doesnt respond then plow for a little bit if still nothing hits then i personally wouldnt bother.
That's pretty much what I did and almost got into a fight over it.

kingy said:
in your case you demonstrated low value unfortunately, as youve both walked in and introduced yourselves and been direct and then she said leave us alone you have little room to calibrate as youve already telegraphed interest. if your indirect then you can punish bad behaviour and build social value in front of her.

direct you are just screening girls straight off the bat, and then move on if they arent.
How did I demostrate low value by just opening the set by introducing or asking them a question? It sounds like we had low value from the start? In that case, how do we avoid that? We were fitted up pretty well and like I said we are average looking. I'm not sure what you mean by telegraphing interest. Just by talking to them no matter what we say they know that we are interesting otherwise we wouldnt be talking to them.

kingy said:
in your case "call them on their ****ty behaviour" for instance.

"where i came from people were raised with a few manours" this will raise your value showing that you are a man and dont take ****, if she is still we are talking leave us alone then just leave :)
Again, this almost got me into a fight. Should I just say fvck it and knock someone out next time a captian trys to step up to me?

Does anybody have any other advice to give. I'm going out in about 2 hours again and I don't really have any more tools to take with me...
 

Unbridled_Phoenix

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A DJ is, by nature, a good salesman. And a good salesman knows there will be days he will be rejected and treated like crap all day long, regardless of how good he is. What makes him good is that his confidence is bolstered by the experience of rejection, not weakened. He thinks to himself,

"When I was getting started, days like this used to kill me. Now, it doesn't faze me at all; look at how strong I have become."

Such is the way of the DJ.

As for more specific advice to your situation, another manifestation of neediness is the NEED to pickup women. You get rid of the outcome dependence, never in your mind are thoughts of "But I am this, that, and the other; how come the women are not into me? How come she left with the broke-@ss guy in jeans and a t-shirt?"

Because he was fun and he didn't NEED her.

So accept that you will have off nights and you will continue to sarge, realize you are going out to entertain YOURSELF and not in some rigid mission to assimilate chicks, and keep your ego out of the equation, it's more of an anchor than a propellor.
 

Zero123

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Unbridled_Phoenix said:
A DJ is, by nature, a good salesman. And a good salesman knows there will be days he will be rejected and treated like crap all day long, regardless of how good he is. What makes him good is that his confidence is bolstered by the experience of rejection, not weakened. He thinks to himself,

"When I was getting started, days like this used to kill me. Now, it doesn't faze me at all; look at how strong I have become."

Such is the way of the DJ.
Thats fine. While I admit I'm not 100% unaffected by this, I don't really think this is a problem for me since I will still approach other women after being rejected.

Unbridled_Phoenix said:
As for more specific advice to your situation, another manifestation of neediness is the NEED to pickup women. You get rid of the outcome dependence, never in your mind are thoughts of "But I am this, that, and the other; how come the women are not into me? How come she left with the broke-@ss guy in jeans and a t-shirt?"

Because he was fun and he didn't NEED her.
I didn't need to pick up women, I wanted to pick up women. Whats wrong with that?

Unbridled_Phoenix said:
So accept that you will have off nights and you will continue to sarge, realize you are going out to entertain YOURSELF and not in some rigid mission to assimilate chicks, and keep your ego out of the equation, it's more of an anchor than a propellor.
I understand it may have just been an off night, but I was looking more at specifically what I could of changed to maybe be more successful.
 

drtk

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Mike32ct said:
Yeah the "We're Lesbians" line is bs. I got that one once.
I got it once as well. They even pretended to kiss when I went away just to make me believe it lol.

It's BS, brush it off and move on.
 

Joe Stud

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dont forget its a numbers game.... keep pitching that spaghetti against the wall, some is dedtined to stick!
 

scrouds

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I've gotten that lesbian line too, although I was at a place where it was totally possible.
 
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