Ex wife ****ed someone else while divorced

[way2smart]

I divorced my wife about 1.5 years ago because of her depression and suicidal behavior.
I was the one who initiated the divorce, she didn't want it and she pleaded and begged me not to divorce and stay with her. I did it anyway.

1.5 years later (i mean now) , I got in touch with her again. Turns out she was already f**cking some one else. After I got in touch with her, she immediately dumped the other guy. She says that she always loved me and only wanted to be with me.

Everything is great between us now, but I am having a hard time moving past the fact that she f*cked some one else. Technically she didn't cheat, because I was the one who dumped her and divorced her.

Anyway, this is a very complicated situation. One thing I am afraid of is that the other guy may come back in the picture. Should I move on and dump her again (by dumping I will f*ck up her life again)? or give her a chance?

The reason why I divorced her was the depression which became unbearable. From what I can see, she is not depressed now. She never cheated on me before, she only started f*cking some one else after we divorced. She met him about 5 months after divorce finalized. Should I give her a chance? or should I dump her?

 

[Meektrop]

I divorced my wife about 1.5 years ago because of her depression and suicidal behavior.
I was the one who initiated the divorce, she didn't want it and she pleaded and begged me not to divorce and stay with her. I did it anyway.

1.5 years later (i mean now) , I got in touch with her again. Turns out she was already f**cking some one else. After I got in touch with her, she immediately dumped the other guy. She says that she always loved me and only wanted to be with me.

Everything is great between us now, but I am having a hard time moving past the fact that she f*cked some one else. Technically she didn't cheat, because I was the one who dumped her and divorced her.

Anyway, this is a very complicated situation. One thing I am afraid of is that the other guy may come back in the picture. Should I move on and dump her again (by dumping I will f*ck up her life again)? or give her a chance?

The reason why I divorced her was the depression which became unbearable. From what I can see, she is not depressed now. She never cheated on me before, she only started f*cking some one else after we divorced. She met him about 5 months after divorce finalized. Should I give her a chance? or should I dump her?

Wow, well you know you broke your marital vows so she is not at fault. But this situation is very complicated and honestly I can't give you advice on what to do you already know the complications of either decision.

Best thing to do is do some soul searching do whatever you need to do to clear your head and think long and hard on this one brother. No one can give you and answer but yourself.

 

[RichardTheFrog]

What do expect someone to do in 1.5 years?

 

[Desdinova]

Everything is great between us now, but I am having a hard time moving past the fact that she f*cked some one else.

You cut yourself clean from this woman, and then you fvcking went back to her??? You must enjoy living in hell...

Eventually, i had her hospitalized twice in a psychiatric hospital, because she tried 2 more suicide attempts.
She is with her parents now and apparently she wants to get back together.

She is still paranoid though, she thinks that I put her in a psychiatric unit intentionally(whatever that means).

I am really tired of all this, but then again it feels morally wrong to divorce a person when she gets mentally ill. But I guess I am looking for reassurance to divorce at this point.

She has episodes in one day where she goes from completely happy to completely said and depressed within several hours. She gets mad at me for no reason. For instance when I was leaving for library to study, she got pissed. When I pulled out my phone to check email, she starts thinking that I am cheating. She also gets pissed when I have breakfast on the couch instead of at the table, because she thinks that I am doing that intentionally to piss her off. Other times she is completely happy and fine.

Her last suicide attempt happened because I went outside for 30 minutes after dark, apparently I am not supposed to go out, because she is afraid of being alone after dark.

I'm trying to figure out why in hell you'd want to go back to this. Things are calm right now, but I guarantee you're going to end up experiencing all this 5hit again. I think all the garbage you previously went through with her is much, much worse than her fvcking some other dude.

 

[Reykhel]

I divorced my wife about 1.5 years ago because of her depression and suicidal behavior.

Yes, this is the good part.
Now, the story really should continue like this...."After I divorced her, I reflected long and hard about what possessed me to marry such a
worthless, depressive, suicidal drag. I found there were a lot of holes in my own masculinity and worth as a man and I vowed never to repeat such a mistake again making it my mission to work on my myself as a man for my own benefit and transcend my shortcomings. I also reflected on the futility of marriage and laughed my marriage off as whimsical and a fancy illusional idea which shall not be getting repeated. The risk to men is not worth the perceived so called reward. I sure am happy to be free."

I was the one who initiated the divorce, she didn't want it and she pleaded and begged me not to divorce and stay with her. I did it anyway.

You took out the garbage. This should be of no consequence to any man. If something or someone is garbage in your life, act accordingly. Garbage is no loss. Good man.

1.5 years later (i mean now) , I got in touch with her again.

Slap yourself. Seriously, why would you do that? Reflect on that a while. Sit down in a comfortable chair, switch off your phone, pour yourself a nice glass of Ardbeg, let all of the weight fall out of your body and reflect on the why. The answer to that question is the key to what you need to overcome as a man.

Turns out she was already f**cking some one else. After I got in touch with her, she immediately dumped the other guy. She says that she always loved me and only wanted to be with me.

Check your expectations. Is it a realistic expectation that she would be fvcking somebody else after 1.5 years. (hint: yes, it is) Anyway, your mistake is getting back in touch. You are now trawling through your old garbage. It's never going to be a pleasant experience.

Everything is great between us now, but I am having a hard time moving past the fact that she f*cked some one else. Technically she didn't cheat, because I was the one who dumped her and divorced her.

Sorry, but you have the mentality of a woman right here. You're thinking like a bytch. (again, I must repeat that you shouldn't even be in this situation, you should have left the garbage where it was. Now you are crying like a little girl because some passers by have rummaged through your old garbage. You are like an insanely jealous old woman carrying the garbage back into the house and thinking "your garbage is soiled as someone else has rummaged through it"

What fvcking difference does it make.

Anyway, this is a very complicated situation.

No it is not. It is quite simple. As a man, you have very weak boundaries and a low sense of worth.

Why not move on like you initially wanted. Why not say "I want more".

One thing I am afraid of is that the other guy may come back in the picture

This is the mentality you need: "if my bytch wants to fvck someone else. She's free to do it. I won't be there when she comes back (if it's exclusive) and I'll simply find another bytch"
Your sense of your own value is very low.
You live in scarcity.

Why not ask for more from life.

Should I move on and dump her again (by dumping I will f*ck up her life again)? or give her a chance?

Yes. You made a mistake by calling her after a year and half.
Will you fvck up her life again? You are responsible for your life and your happiness. It sounds like you have some nice guy codependent issues going on here.

 

[dude99]

I divorced my wife about 1.5 years ago because of her depression and suicidal behavior.
I was the one who initiated the divorce, she didn't want it and she pleaded and begged me not to divorce and stay with her. I did it anyway.

1.5 years later (i mean now) , I got in touch with her again. Turns out she was already f**cking some one else. After I got in touch with her, she immediately dumped the other guy. She says that she always loved me and only wanted to be with me.

Everything is great between us now, but I am having a hard time moving past the fact that she f*cked some one else. Technically she didn't cheat, because I was the one who dumped her and divorced her.

Anyway, this is a very complicated situation. One thing I am afraid of is that the other guy may come back in the picture. Should I move on and dump her again (by dumping I will f*ck up her life again)? or give her a chance?

The reason why I divorced her was the depression which became unbearable. From what I can see, she is not depressed now. She never cheated on me before, she only started f*cking some one else after we divorced. She met him about 5 months after divorce finalized. Should I give her a chance? or should I dump her?

Did all the problems in the marriage magically go away?

Did her depression all magically go away and she is 100% cured.

Do you HAVE ANY HESITATION OR FEELING IN YOUR GUT TELLING YOU NO!!

do you honestly believe this time will be different?

 

[way2smart]

You cut yourself clean from this woman, and then you fvcking went back to her??? You must enjoy living in hell...
I'm trying to figure out why in hell you'd want to go back to this. Things are calm right now, but I guarantee you're going to end up experiencing all this 5hit again. I think all the garbage you previously went through with her is much, much worse than her fvcking some other dude.

Thanks for replying Desdinova. Love your posts.

I thought exactly what you said, but its possible that it was my fault that she got depressed. You may ask why? Well i was acting like alpha male and I was not giving a sh*t about her. I never said I loved her and always acted like I don't care. Don't you think that alone can lead some women to depression? The reason I am saying this is that I myself got depressed way back when I was dating a girl who didn't give a sh*t about me, that was before I became red pill. Is it possible she got depressed because of me being indifferent or too alpha?

 

[beforeimgone]

I divorced my wife about 1.5 years ago because of her depression and suicidal behavior.
I was the one who initiated the divorce, she didn't want it and she pleaded and begged me not to divorce and stay with her. I did it anyway.

1.5 years later (i mean now) , I got in touch with her again. Turns out she was already f**cking some one else. After I got in touch with her, she immediately dumped the other guy. She says that she always loved me and only wanted to be with me.

Everything is great between us now, but I am having a hard time moving past the fact that she f*cked some one else. Technically she didn't cheat, because I was the one who dumped her and divorced her.

Anyway, this is a very complicated situation. One thing I am afraid of is that the other guy may come back in the picture. Should I move on and dump her again (by dumping I will f*ck up her life again)? or give her a chance?

The reason why I divorced her was the depression which became unbearable. From what I can see, she is not depressed now. She never cheated on me before, she only started f*cking some one else after we divorced. She met him about 5 months after divorce finalized. Should I give her a chance? or should I dump her?

Her depression isn't your problem. Her suicidal tendencies aren't your problem.

She has been getting her pvssy pounced since you left. Why do you care?

You're in a unique situation in regards to her other men. Get some money from her while you continue to fvck her. She is worth nothing. Considering anything more than that would make you weak in her eyes

 

[Roober]

Been divorced 1.5 years and your worried about who she is screwing? Sounds like you are the one that is stuck...

 

[machoMax]

This is very hard to answer, only person who can find this answer is: YOU!

 

[sosousage]

Why not be with her (if you want to) and spin plates also? This way your thoughts about the other guy can go away

 

[marmel75]

I divorced my wife about 1.5 years ago because of her depression and suicidal behavior.
I was the one who initiated the divorce, she didn't want it and she pleaded and begged me not to divorce and stay with her. I did it anyway.

1.5 years later (i mean now) , I got in touch with her again. Turns out she was already f**cking some one else. After I got in touch with her, she immediately dumped the other guy. She says that she always loved me and only wanted to be with me.

Everything is great between us now, but I am having a hard time moving past the fact that she f*cked some one else. Technically she didn't cheat, because I was the one who dumped her and divorced her.

Anyway, this is a very complicated situation. One thing I am afraid of is that the other guy may come back in the picture. Should I move on and dump her again (by dumping I will f*ck up her life again)? or give her a chance?

The reason why I divorced her was the depression which became unbearable. From what I can see, she is not depressed now. She never cheated on me before, she only started f*cking some one else after we divorced. She met him about 5 months after divorce finalized. Should I give her a chance? or should I dump her?

What the hell do you expect her to do become a nun??

This post is ridiculous.

 

[Chev.Chelios]

Hey man, gone through the same chit you have. I fully understand its very FVCKING difficult to shed off this chodiness when your stuck in it.

Jealousy is a big one..
Insecurity
Low self esteem
No lifes purpose..

It all comes down to deep soul work needing to be done, read the imitation of christ, pretty gangster stuff.

 

[FairShake]

You sound like you were kind of a d!ck. And I don't sense much change.

Leave her alone...for her sake.

 

[Billtx49]

Is it possible she got depressed because of me being indifferent or too alpha?

The cause of her depression back then is irrelevant and as you say the reason for the divorce. That part is over and done now, and don't try to become a sick womans psychologist after the fact.

What should be a primary concern to you now is what she did about it. Did she fvck a man or six to feel better about herself, did she get professional help and resolve it, or is she only hiding it with Lexapro now. The answer to that question will help you.

Bottom line, If she got professional help, she should be able to communicate to you the reason for her earlier troubles now.

 

[El Payaso]

You divorced her (even though your vows specifically said "in health and in sickness..."). Okay. All good. Let her be but no, you went back to her again and now you're complaining that she slept with someone else after you divorced her. Get over yourself.

 

[Serenity]

Some people have a principle of not going back if they break up/divorce their partner. I like that principle, because going back as you've discovered complicates things a lot.

Sadly you're beyond that point, you made the decision to go back. If you stay you would have broken the vows, it could be just a matter of time before it breaks anyways. If you leave again and stay away, I actually see that as less complicated.

Sounds odd her depression went away shortly after you went out of her life. Have you considered that you could be the cause? She could have been in denial about you doing things she doesn't really like, it's not uncommon.

 

[Reykhel]

1.5 years later (i mean now) , I got in touch with her again. Turns out she was already f**cking some one else

Bear this in mind...when you contacted her she was fvcking her current man in that moment of time. She easily cast him off to get back
with you, her husband who dumped her, because he was just her current fvck buddy......

He meant nothing. He was just filling a need. A sexual and emotional need that she had since you upped and walked out...
1.5 years ago...........
18 full months ago.........18 months of sexual needs....
.....make no mistake about it.......
....he was not the only one she fvcked in those 18 long months. She was a woman with needs. Gaping holes. Gaping sexual and emotional
holes that needed to be filled.......
In eighteen months, you can imagine those holes were filled over and over again....multiple times, by multiple men.....
how many would you say in 18 months? All that pain, all that emotion....all that horniness.....
I'd say she had at least 10 ****s inside her in all that time. Sucking all that ****. Does she swallow? That's a lot of
swallowed ***..........does she like anal? I bet she does now. So many women that are hurt find the cure in hard anal. It's a
salvation.....

....Does it make you feel bad? What does it matter. You don't own her. And you decided to let her go. You don't own anyone.

You live with it. Or you move on.

You cannot sit on two chairs at the same time.

 

[Dingo]

See you in a few months all heartbroken, confused and all together ****ed....

 

[way2smart]

See you in a few months all heartbroken, confused and all together ****ed....

Yep, here I am after a few months. I am not heartbroken but I had to dump her again, because all those issues came back. She went back to being BPD after about a month.

Lesson learned. Never get back with your ex. Never ever.