Ex GF broke up with me because she "wasn't ready for a relationship yet"?

[Dodgypirate]

I'm certain you DJs have heard this many times over. but have you heard it this way before?

Dated a girl for just over a month, things were going great, we went on many dates and we ****ed many times. After the first ****ing session, soon after I had gone downstairs to bed (we live in dorms) I get a text saying "You were ****ing amazing". Right all good so far. A week later she sends me a text saying "I don't usually say this to anyone but I really, really like you" .... great! :woo:

3 weeks in and guess what she wants me to meet her parents??!?! shiiite I thought this is going hellishly fast but nonetheless I accepted it.

We had a good time and according to my ex my parents "really liked me" too.

So things were moving pretty fast admittedly, but SHE is the one who initiated the speed - not me.

Anyway after 4 weeks things started to go cold ... we were still having sex and all but it's more to do with the verbal side of the relationship.

Apparently she "loves" to "banter" ... I don't mind it but her's was out of control. She would call me retard and other names not only in private for no particular reason but out in public too!! ... I told her that I didn't like it, but she would keep doing so eventually my lid blew off one night when I was drunk - we had an argument.

Anyway 3 weeks ago, almost to the day, she initiated "break up" after texting me she wanted to "talk". I knew what was coming. I walked to her room with my head held high and braced for the news.

Don't think there's any need to tell you what happened besides her "excuse" of not being able to be in a relationship yet. WHAT THE ACTUAL PHUCK?

Day 2 of BU I went straight into NC - I told her during her stupid rant that I didn't want to be friends with her (win! :woo: ) ... she asked why I said "Friends don't phuck and I've got feelings for you, more than just friends".

Anyway, whatever. 1 week after NC I was talking to a mate about us going out with some others. I see my ex come down the stairs in the corner of my eye. She notices me, opens the door and says "Hey! How's it been" ... I didn't even have enough time to answer her, why? My friend, in a stupid move, jumped through the kitchen door, out of sight and my ex SAW him !! :cuss:

Every time I see her now she looks pissed angry at me :/

I know this is going to sound stupid to youz but I still like her and :nervous: .... want her back.

What can I do to increase my chances?

Thanks for the read

UPDATE: Forgot to mention a tilting part ... When she did break up with me I asked her to "think more about it" ... not necessarily in a begging way at all, more as in I was seriously confused at the time to why she would break up with me if she had said/done all those things only weeks ago. This was just when she broke up with me, ust to make things clear, after that I went directly into NC.

 

[Mr_Stinky]

Day 2 of BU I went straight into NC - I told her during her stupid rant that I didn't want to be friends with her (win! :woo: ) ... she asked why I said "Friends don't phuck and I've got feelings for you, more than just friends".

There is no need to give them a reason. Not only do you leave with your self-respect -- you also give them no closure. When there is no closure, there is a better chance of getting her back

 

[Dodgypirate]

There is no need to give them a reason. Not only do you leave with your self-respect -- you also give them no closure. When there is no closure, there is a better chance of getting her back

So you believe there is a chance then?

What is my plan of action?

 

[Bible_Belt]

You're obviously both young. Relationships at college age rarely survive the first fight, because that would take too much maturity. She obviously has a lot of growing up to do. The way that you asked her to stop her behavior was very mature and reasonable, but it didn't work, because she is neither.

Just for the sake of understanding what's going on, when she calls you retard in front of people, she's basically wanting you to amog her. She wants you to display the alpha behavior of retaliating, but in a fun way. I know hindsight is 20/20 and it's always easy to think of a snappy comeback later, but if you had said right back to her "isn't it a crime to have sex with retards? Someone's gonna report you," you would have passed the test, made the gina tingle, and everything would have continued to go well.

If it seems like she hates you, it means she will still at least have sex with you. But get ready to see her with Rebound Boyfriend. I would guess that is coming soon.

 

[Dodgypirate]

You're obviously both young. Relationships at college age rarely survive the first fight, because that would take too much maturity. She obviously has a lot of growing up to do. The way that you asked her to stop her behavior was very mature and reasonable, but it didn't work, because she is neither.

Just for the sake of understanding what's going on, when she calls you retard in front of people, she's basically wanting you to amog her. She wants you to display the alpha behavior of retaliating, but in a fun way. I know hindsight is 20/20 and it's always easy to think of a snappy comeback later, but if you had said right back to her "isn't it a crime to have sex with retards? Someone's gonna report you," you would have passed the test, made the gina tingle, and everything would have continued to go well.

If it seems like she hates you, it means she will still at least have sex with you. But get ready to see her with Rebound Boyfriend. I would guess that is coming soon.

Nah Nah Nah NAH ... she wouldn't have wanted me to say that ... it would've turned out the same way. She would have called it "highly indecent" and would have dumped me on the spot hahaha.

She hates me? You sure about that one? .... She saw my mate jump into the kitchen ... as soon as she did she just turned around and walked off without saying a word. That's the last time I had any interaction with her.

You reckon I can still have sex with her? How? .... Maybe I can use that to get back with her?

 

[Dodgypirate]

You're obviously both young. Relationships at college age rarely survive the first fight, because that would take too much maturity. She obviously has a lot of growing up to do. The way that you asked her to stop her behavior was very mature and reasonable, but it didn't work, because she is neither.

Just for the sake of understanding what's going on, when she calls you retard in front of people, she's basically wanting you to amog her. She wants you to display the alpha behavior of retaliating, but in a fun way. I know hindsight is 20/20 and it's always easy to think of a snappy comeback later, but if you had said right back to her "isn't it a crime to have sex with retards? Someone's gonna report you," you would have passed the test, made the gina tingle, and everything would have continued to go well.

If it seems like she hates you, it means she will still at least have sex with you. But get ready to see her with Rebound Boyfriend. I would guess that is coming soon.

Forgot to mention that she has called me a "retard" and other nasty words quite a few times before and have told to stop it - which she didn't.

I was talking to her "best" friend (think they had a fight lol) and she thought that my ex broke it off with me because she thought it was going too fast ... but LOL! 1) my ex made it official 2) I met her parents because my ex wanted me to!

WTF hahaha .... I'm of course dating other girls at the moment ... potential date on Friday only waiting for the answer (it's only saying delivered at the moment, but she's 200% interested). I boned a girl on Friday last.

 

[usernamedox11]

Would've said "if I wasn't a retard, I wouldn't be with you" and laughed at her.

 

[goodganji44]

Keep on banging other women. When she sees or hears about this, she'll be "ready for another relationship" again. From there you'll have the ultimate power and gift of telling the btch no and moving on with your great life. Good luck sir.

 

[Dodgypirate]

Would've said "if I wasn't a retard, I wouldn't be with you" and laughed at her.

That's even worse haha.

Anyway back to my point, I want to be with her/get back with her.

No Contact has been for 3 weeks now and she hasn't contacted me.

What has happened before:

1rst week of no Contact ... Ex sees me, comes to say hello, notices my friend run into the kitchen, she walks off without saying a word.

2nd week, I'm out partying with another friend, 2 of ex's friends come up, one of them sits next to me and asks if I'm "over" her yet ... I say yes and she asks "really?".

On the same night I caught my ex looking at me a few times (at least 3) ... My friend also pointed out that whenever he looked at her, she would be looking at me (5 times at least).

Weird :/ :crazy: :crazy:

 

[Dodgypirate]

Keep on banging other women. When she sees or hears about this, she'll be "ready for another relationship" again. From there you'll have the ultimate power and gift of telling the btch no and moving on with your great life. Good luck sir.

Already banged a btch, made her *** and everything
2/3s of the way to date another girl, she'll text me tomorrow.

How can I make her hear or see me with/****ing other women?! Just want to rub it in her btch face ....

I'm ready for a relationship, she isn't ... so she better come back and beg for me ... I'll have a laugh

 

[goodganji44]

Already banged a btch, made her *** and everything
2/3s of the way to date another girl, she'll text me tomorrow.

How can I make her hear or see me with/****ing other women?! Just want to rub it in her btch face ....

I'm ready for a relationship, she isn't ... so she better come back and beg for me ... I'll have a laugh

You could use Facebook if you really wanted to. But in your situation I wouldn't even bother. Because you're too caught up in the idea of getting her back. It will just come off as try-hard.

What you should do is genuinely forget about this chick and keep plugging forward and plowing other chicks. Chicks have this sixth sense to smell the pzzy on you. Your ex-GF will be able to tell that you've been getting it in just by your demeanor alone. Your inner game is what will help you win in the end.

Just keep these two things in mind in regards to your ex-GF.

1. Women hate to be ignored
2. Women hate to be replaced.


Going ghost is the best weapon you have in your arsenal. Use these two facts to your advantage and best of luck to you.

 

[Dodgypirate]

You could use Facebook if you really wanted to. But in your situation I wouldn't even bother. Because you're too caught up in the idea of getting her back. It will just come off as try-hard.

What you should do is genuinely forget about this chick and keep plugging forward and plowing other chicks. Chicks have this sixth sense to smell the pzzy on you. Your ex-GF will be able to tell that you've been getting it in just by your demeanor alone. Your inner game is what will help you win in the end.

Just keep these two things in mind in regards to your ex-GF.

1. Women hate to be ignored
2. Women hate to be replaced.


Going ghost is the best weapon you have in your arsenal. Use these two facts to your advantage and best of luck to you.

1. Check
2. Check

Going ghost? Check ... I've done all three of them.

But a few questions remain that I'm waiting to be answered:

Why 1) make me meet her parents 2) make things official 3) say things like " I never really say this to anyone but I really, really like you"????

AND why did her friend come up to me and ask if I was "over her" and when I replied yes why did she say "oh really?"

AND Why was she staring at me so much? I caught her 3 times and my friend 5 times at least.

 

[Dodgypirate]

Anyone? Would be much appreciated.

Meanwhile I'll go **** an 8 :rock:

 

[goodganji44]

1. Check
2. Check

Going ghost? Check ... I've done all three of them.

But a few questions remain that I'm waiting to be answered:

Why 1) make me meet her parents 2) make things official 3) say things like " I never really say this to anyone but I really, really like you"????

AND why did her friend come up to me and ask if I was "over her" and when I replied yes why did she say "oh really?"

AND Why was she staring at me so much? I caught her 3 times and my friend 5 times at least.

1,2, and 3 are just women living in the moment. The way she felt about you at that point in time can completely change within the drop of a dime. Sometimes it's even out of your control. A woman's words means jack crap. You were making her FEEL good about herself so she was just simply acting on the feel good vibes you were giving her AT THAT MOMENT. 10 minutes from now, that could be something completely different.

The reason why your friend came inquiring about her to you is because it's highly likely your ex sent her on a mission to get information because your effort of No Contact is working. You might as well picture her friend eyeing you down with a pen and paper in her hand, because everything you say WILL go back to her. I can promise you that 100%. You're probably re-building attraction by simply not paying them less mind and acting indifferent. Good job.

Sounds like to me all you have to do is separate the emotions (I like this chick and I want her back) from the logic (She broke up with me, she doesn't want me, time to explore options). The best logical option is to keep doing your own thing and not give two fcks about her. Why? Because that's what MEN do.

I'll say it once again and I can't preach this enough.

1. Women hate to be ignored
2. Women HATE HATE HAAAAATE to be replaced.

 

[Kuano13]

This is sad bro.

You have to be in control of your relationship. Unless you would like to be no more than **** buddies, I advise you to TAKE IT UPON YOURSELF to make sure things move a little slower. If she talks to you in that manner that early on in the "relationship"(more like fling to me), it may be best to leave her since she has no respect or fear of you leaving her. From what i read, she sounds like she has some issues. What smart "Woman"(I feel like many college age adults do not realize we are real adults) would have a guy meet her parents that soon? Her parents are probably thinking "that's the 12th one this year".

I say ditch her for her best friend, then ditch the best friend afterwards for a real gf.

 

[Dodgypirate]

Right so according to you guys there's no way back in this "relationship".

I don't think she's had any guys since breaking up with her ex 4 months ago.

My friends didn't understand why she would break up with me because "she wasn't ready for a relationship" they said it was a joke of an excuse.

Again I just want to tell you that I do want to try things again with her but take it much slower than we did

I've taken the liberty to write down what I'm doing:

1) No contact phase: Haven't spoken to her for 3 weeks now, it's help me a lot. Apparently the rule of thumb before attempting to contact her is 30 days but I think I'll add an extra week to that.
2) So, after 5 weeks of NC (2 weeks from now) I'll send her a non-threatening text i.e: "Hey, what's that fancy restaurant you kept talking about, the one on the way to your house?" ...
3) If she answers, GREAT! this gives me a clean shot to small talk (leaving an hour between responses and making sure it isn't too long and I end the conversation). If she doesn't, I'll keep up the NC and contact her later.
4) After small talk sessions, at least 3, I'll invite her out for a *casual* meet up and woo her (again).
5) After a couple of those I'll bring her out on a date, and kiss.

Sounds good?

 

[Bible_Belt]

My list would be

1) get her drunk
2) fvck her
3) the next morning tell her that she was right, the two of you just aren't ready for a relationship

and then repeat process as desired.

 

[Dodgypirate]

My list would be

1) get her drunk
2) fvck her
3) the next morning tell her that she was right, the two of you just aren't ready for a relationship

and then repeat process as desired.

Not going to work ... to be able to get her drunk I would have to buy her drinks ... to be able to buy her drinks I need to be on speaking terms with her ... which I'm not, not surprisingly since I'm on *No Contact* with her.

Last time she got drunk she got mad at me for being in her vicinity ... not because I wanted to, just because her mates are mates with me :/

 

[papawapa]

Better idea than texting her about the restaurant and hoping to transition to small talk would be to do it like this...


'Hey I have one question for you...whats the name of that fancy restaurant on the way to your house?'

"Its blah blah blah."

'Thanks, ive got a date, thanks for the recommendation. I jope she likes the food as much as you.'

 

[TitanSS]

You messed up when you told her to "think about it" and when you told her "you had feelings for her as more than just friends". Just walk out of the room without appearing butthurt about it.

She asked you to meet her parents... which seems good, right? Well it is good... as long as you say no. Girls are constantly testing you to see how available you are to them. Use your own scarcity to your advantage. As someone said above.. girls will try to get you to act like an afc.. and then when you obey them they resent you.

Chances are things got cold when she started talking to another dude and when things with the other dude were getting serious she dumped you. Girls plan **** out ahead of time. They don't dump you and then go looking for a new boy toy. The new boy toy is in place beforehand.

You can't do anything to increase your chances and you shouldn't want anyone who doesn't want you. You have to be less interested in her than she is in you and you have got to have other options so when the fickle *****s decide they're going to go cold you can just go even colder and start ****ing someone else.

Chances are if when she went cold on you you had went no contact and started seeing someone else she probably wouldn't have dumped you... but the best part is... even if she did who cares? You're ****ing someone else anyway.

Anyone that tells you to do anything other than spin plates and go ghost on her has been listening to too many country songs.

Keep one foot out the door.