Every Woman Left On The Market Is Fvcked Up

[l_e_g_e_n_d]

Okay but Legend let me remind you of something you and Guru said.

This is what Guru said in another thread:
This is what you said earlier on in this thread:
You then went on to state:

So YOU and Guru have both said the same thing, that in a nutshell, I'm a worthless piece of shyt. So in being told I'm a worthless piece of shyt, seeing as though I'm the only CONSTANT here and I should take personal responsiblity to "fix my flaws", I go out and try to work on not being a worthless piece of shyt.

Then when I do the work on that, it comes back that I'm still a worthless piece of shyt for (insert this new reason here).

Interesting, that Guru critiqued you months ago, yet his critique had remained with you and you mentioned it many times thereafter. If someone critiqued me (especially in an internet forum), it would sit with me for a few seconds, I would get a good chuckle, and unconsciously forget about it.

Why do others' opinions of you matter so much?

It's not that Tenacity hates himself, it's that EVERYBODY ELSE HATES TENACITY and that makes me uncomfortable because I honestly DO NOT KNOW what the fvck I'm doing to everybody and what the fvck I've been doing to everybody for 33 years.

I don't know you well enough, but in my observations of you, this is what you tend to do in this order:

• Engage with a new person in an interesting and meaningful way;
• Befriend and develop rapport;
• Maintain rapport; and
• Out of seemly nowhere, turn against the person or the person's helpful advice to you.

Is this not what you have done with other members and plates, that is, build a rapport, and then out-of-seemly-nowhere, commence a rage diatribe against them (e.g. guru1000, Poon King; TO; your six "quality" plates)?

Does this pattern seem familiar? Remember, in a previous thread, I mentioned that you self-sabotage. By your own admission and others', did you not state you have/had BPD tendencies? Perhaps a deep, honest introspection is warranted here.

 

[l_e_g_e_n_d]

BPD Signs & Symptoms

• Frantic efforts to avoid real or imagined abandonment (Affirmative)
  
• A pattern of intense and unstable relationships with family, friends, and loved ones, often swinging from extreme closeness and love (idealization) to extreme dislike or anger (devaluation) (Affirmative)
  
• Distorted and unstable self-image or sense of self (Affirmative)
  
• Impulsive and often dangerous behaviors (Affirmative)
  
• Recurring suicidal behaviors or threats or self-harming behavior (Affirmative)
  
• Intense and highly changeable moods, with each episode lasting from a few hours to a few days(Affirmative)
• Chronic feelings of emptiness (Affirmative)
  
• Inappropriate, intense anger or problems controlling anger (Affirmative)
  
• Having stress-related paranoid thoughts (Affirmative)
  
• Having severe dissociative symptoms, such as feeling cut off from oneself or losing touch with reality (Affirmative)

I think we have a winner!

 

[mrgoodstuff]

Interesting, that Guru critiqued you months ago, yet his critique had remained with you and you mentioned it many times thereafter. If someone critiqued me (especially in an internet forum), it would sit with me for a few seconds, I would get a good chuckle, and unconsciously forget about it.

Why do others' opinions of you matter so much?


I don't know you well enough, but in my observations of you, this is what you tend to do in this order:

• Engage with a new person in an interesting and meaningful way;
• Befriend and develop rapport;
• Maintain rapport; and
• Out of seemly nowhere, turn against the person or the person's helpful advice to you.

Is this not what you have done with other members and plates, that is, build a rapport, and then out-of-seemly-nowhere, commence a rage diatribe against them (e.g. guru1000, Poon King; TO; your six "quality" plates)?

Does this pattern seem familiar? Remember, in a previous thread, I mentioned that you self-sabotage. By your own admission and others', did you not state you have/had BPD tendencies? Perhaps a deep, honest introspection is warranted here.

He maybe living in a driven "rage", and this smashing of 200 broads over the last 4-5 years was indicative of that. He maybe fighting his true nature, and having that anger, and projecting how he feels about himself onto the rest of us. Who knows. But the statement that "everyone" hates tenacity is a bit extreme and he shouldn't feel that. If he looks at the words again he should realize it's not completely rational.

 

[Tenacity]

BPD Signs & Symptoms

• Frantic efforts to avoid real or imagined abandonment (Affirmative)
  
• A pattern of intense and unstable relationships with family, friends, and loved ones, often swinging from extreme closeness and love (idealization) to extreme dislike or anger (devaluation) (Affirmative)
  
• Distorted and unstable self-image or sense of self (Affirmative)
  
• Impulsive and often dangerous behaviors (Affirmative)
  
• Recurring suicidal behaviors or threats or self-harming behavior (Affirmative)
  
• Intense and highly changeable moods, with each episode lasting from a few hours to a few days(Affirmative)
• Chronic feelings of emptiness (Affirmative)
  
• Inappropriate, intense anger or problems controlling anger (Affirmative)
  
• Having stress-related paranoid thoughts (Affirmative)
  
• Having severe dissociative symptoms, such as feeling cut off from oneself or losing touch with reality (Affirmative)

I think we have a winner!

Hmmm.....okay maybe I'm BPD, shyt I don't know lol.

What do I do about it? Yes, like I said looking back over the 100 or so NON PAID women I had since 2010, I can say 1 for sure would have been good, but I could probably add 2 or 3 more to the list maybeeee. I would say if I would not have randomly just went off on up to 3 women over that period of time, they could have went "somewhere special", now I don't know how FAR, but they could have went "somewhere special".

- Also with Guru I did "make up" with him.

- I tried to "make up" with Poon King but the guy continued with the beta fa.ggot shyt so maybe he's just as BPD as me

 

[l_e_g_e_n_d]

What do I do about it? Yes, like I said looking back over the 100 or so NON PAID women I had since 2010, I can say 1 for sure would have been good, but I could probably add 2 or 3 more to the list maybeeee. I would say if I would not have randomly just went off on up to 3 women over that period of time, they could have went "somewhere special", now I don't know how FAR, but they could have went "somewhere special".

The market is at fault for the 97%, but who's at fault for the 3%?

In other threads, I recommended ways to get that 3% number a bit higher with a better selection which will be open to you with a few minor changes. But these external changes won't stop you from needlessly snapping at them when your "episodes" begin.

You know the definition of "insanity." What are you going to do differently this time?

 

[Atom Smasher]

Tenacity, I think you are caring too much what people think of you. That's looking for validation outside yourself, thus you are trying to suck value out of people when you should be giving it. Generally speaking, people aren't nice, so you can't expect them to root for you.

Also, it looks like you are carrying this low self esteem around with you into every situation. The loser wins out because he's comfortable with himself. He's too dumb to realize what a loser he is, he just happily goes along with it. Smart people are often too aware of their own flaws.

You have a lot going for you. You don't want to present yourself as an arrogant overload like some of these alpha promoters. Just know that you're good enough and present yourself in a friendly, positive manner.

Tenacity, the primary indicator of your problem is that you were compelled to ignore zekko's post.

He hit the nail squarely on the head and his is the one post that you didn't acknowledge.

You have been a slave to other people's opinions about you. That dynamic has been your jailer all your life.

When you were younger you were misunderstood by many and you accepted that their opinion was correct and superceded any notion to the contrary. Take it from me, a man who grew up exactly the same way.

You are in turmoil now because the authentic YOU is trying to break out of prison. Your ego is viciously fighting against that because it fears disintegration and annihilation.

The good news is that this is all an indicator of hope, and that you are becoming ready to challenge that no longer valid self-concept which is fighting you so ferociously. This is the beginning of the end for that former life and the ego will naturally fight for its own survival. Translation: You are experiencing internal resistance from the inner mechanism that was formed before you even had language skills (IOW as a baby). That is why you can't perceive nor quantify that inner mechanism. It was formed from impression, not from thought. Therefore grasping it has been like grasping the air.

You need to read zekko's post sgain, along with the other posts that said that you care about others opinions too much, and take a huge step back.

Stop trying to figure out what is wrong, and instead build something NEW. Sit down with a pad of paper and write down why the old way will no longer be tolerated and then write down a description of the man you intend to build on your own terms.

Along the way, allow yourself to make mistakes and allow yourself time to grow and develop the new Tenacity.

You have been living by impressions that a baby formulated, just as I lived most of my life. The baby had no way to think; it could only conceive of impressions in order to formulate whom he was.

Get that pad of paper and get to work. Don't accept the impressions of an infant who was only trying to survive.

Why did you choose the screen name, "Tenacity"? I know why... You know why too. Whom do you want to be? What will you refuse to accept anymore?

 

[playa99]

@Tenacity you have a plethora of great advice in this thread, in particular, post #163 by @Atom Smasher is epic advice.

You are clearly suffering and seem to gain some clarity one day and lose it the next. I've been there myself and it's a horrible place to be.

The truth is that you ARE enough, you cannot please everyone and be what everyone wants you to be. It comes across as though you are running around trying to please everyone and that's never gonna work. It is my belief that this is why you keep on running into trouble wherever you go.

When I say you ARE enough, I do not mean for one second stay static and don't improve, I mean accept yourself in the present moment.

It sounds like your coming to the conclusion you want to be a DJ, not a PUA, red-pill MGTOW or anything else. Align your goals and actions solely to this end. Do not try and tackle your whole life problem at once, take one day at a time. You've spent a lot of time debunking the 'quality woman' myth, and whilst the vast majority of women are trash, it is pointless expending energy proving it.

You cannot be happy in a relationship until you are happy being single. Work on your inner control, you may get temporary satisfaction when you cuss a woman out, but is it really worth it?

Speaking from personal experience I lost a lot of people who I classed as close friends on my route to becoming a DJ, I would also hazard a guess that a lot of posters here are the same. The people I went to school with and had acted like a complete AFC around no longer wanted anything to do with me. I didn't fit the nice 'Playa99' sized box that I had previously come in anymore and they couldn't accept the positive changes that I'd made in my life.

Since my second awakening as DJ, I have lost a lot of people again, not through conflict, but because my life trajectory is completely different from theirs.

Travelling would do you a world of good if you haven't done so already, shoot me a PM if you're interested in travelling around Europe, I've been to most major cities and would be more than happy to give you some pointers.

 

[zekko]

Hmmm.....okay maybe I'm BPD, shyt I don't know lol.

I really hope for your sake you are not, because from what I have seen treatment for BPDs has a very, very low success rate.

What you have in common with BPDs though, is that they are very persistent in hanging on to their self destructive thought tendencies. You have to find a way to break the habit of negative thoughts, because they are not serving you in any good way.

I had to break my habit of negative thinking when I was younger, because I realized that no matter what the situation, negative thinking was not going to help, positive thinking is always better. I knew the negative thinking was not working, so it had to change. I was very vigilant of my thoughts during this time, and every time I caught myself thinking negatively, I stopped myself and reframed it.

 

[TheMonkeyKing]

" If there's something that can be done, do it. If nothing can be done, accept it. "

 

[Atom Smasher]

I suspect that while women can virtually never recover, men can because of their facility to self-observe and introspectively develop new thought habits.

It's a hard road, but do-able for men who are determined.

Tenacity, you should chew on zekko's many good posts in this thread. He knows what he's talking about.

It's possible (and desireable) for a man to decide to observe himself without judging and condemnation, and choose a different frame as his awareness grows.

Self-observation without condemnation had been a huge part of my growth process.

 

[Tenacity]

I suspect that while women can virtually never recover, men can because of their facility to self-observe and introspectively develop new thought habits.

It's a hard road, but do-able for men who are determined.

Tenacity, you should chew on zekko's many good posts in this thread. He knows what he's talking about.

It's possible (and desireable) for a man to decide to observe himself without judging and condemnation, and choose a different frame as his awareness grows.

Self-observation without condemnation had been a huge part of my growth process.

Yes, zekko is my bro and I've been taking it all in.

I do know I have internal issues related to anger, rage, bitterness, and that general negativity he's talking about and I need to get it under control. What really HELPED back in the day was being apart of a church ministry where they talked about being overly positive/having faith, etc.

It's just that I felt like being overly positive back in the day didn't prepare me for various life events (including how women work as well as how business/career markets work) and it led to me experiencing a lot of pain, hardship, and loss.

So when I began becoming more CRITICAL, it developed into CRITICAL THINKING. And it's been that critical thinking that's allowed me to progress.

But being a good critical thinker can easily turn into being a negative thinker. Critical thinking is all about identifying the positives AND negatives, then coming up with a balanced approach/analysis. But at times, I tend to identify the negatives, don't put enough focus on the positives, and my approach/analysis becomes unbalanced. That's when the RAGE episodes take place.

 

[Atom Smasher]

It's all about thought habits, my man. The good news is that you can change them slowly but surely. You already have an excellent start because you are aware of what your problems are and you're talking about them.

You're not unlike me in my youth. The best thing I ever did for myself was to decide to observe my thought habits and start to refute them with a logically better frame. If you feel the rage, you might say, "OK, what must I be thinking in order to trigger this rage? Is that thinking logical and does it serve me? Is there another optional way for me to look at this, and even leverage it to my advantage?"

Faith can also be subject to extremes, as you well know. I'm a bible-believing man, and I find that reading my bible changes my outlook and character without even trying or thinking about it. It's funny how you can be reading your bible, then go out driving and get cut off by someone, and because of what you've just been exposed to (scripture), you automatically observe yourself calmly letting it go with zero effort. It wears off, though, so I know I have to re-up every day.

 

[TheProspect]

Faith can also be subject to extremes, as you well know. I'm a bible-believing man, and I find that reading my bible changes my outlook and character without even trying or thinking about it. It's funny how you can be reading your bible, then go out driving and get cut off by someone, and because of what you've just been exposed to (scripture), you automatically observe yourself calmly letting it go with zero effort. It wears off, though, so I know I have to re-up every day.

I agree. However, I don't think this is exclusive to scripture.

There are certain books I can just flip open and read a few random pages and it alters my state (like the bible does for you). The effect diminishes gradually but, like you said, it can be re-upped by reading occasionally.

The bible, self-growth, and meditative books can be applicable in almost any situation, so their effects are noticed more often compared to reading a few pages of a real estate theory book (or any other book) and not being in any situation to apply it in the near future.

 

[kronreiff]

It's not about fvcked up women entirely. It's about the EXTREMELY LOW quality of women that are out there. Schwagg would be a better word!

 

[ChristopherColumbus]

RE church, faith, reading etc, I think what is a common element here is some ritual of sorts. Sadly, that ritual has been increasingly lost in the more modern churches, where they can become rather noisy, and based on hype not hope.