Dont feel like dating anymore

[Robert28]

Advice from the old lady:

Attitude is everything. I’ve seen average to below average men pull tail and have swagger and I’ve seen really insecure very handsome men so paralyzed by fear of rejection that they won’t even say “Hi” to a girl they find cute.

Bad attitudes hover over a person like a dark cloud of negativity. Nobody wants to be around that…not other dudes and certainly not attractive women.

There is a reason 48 Laws of Power states to avoid the unhappy and the unlucky. Negativity and bad juju rubs off. I have no desire to hang around that…zero. Life is tough enough without creating further obstacles through a curmudgeon attitude.

So people with bad attitudes emit a vibe that says “Run Away!” and comes off creepy.

And that is on the individual with the crappy attitude, 100%.

I mean really. How is whining about women’s bad/entitled/bratty/whatever adjective you like insert here working out for you?

Right. It isn’t. You might as well go cuss Mount Everest for being Mount Everest or the weather for being the weather. You cannot exert any control over those things. In a similar way you cannot exert any real control over another human being, certainly not a sweeping generalization of human beings such as “All Women”.

It’s a case of the old dog who lays on a nail on the porch whining about the nail but too lazy to get up and move to resolve the discomfort the nail causes.

Some men certainly show up here shellshocked wondering WTF just happened in some specific life circumstance. But the perrinial complainers are just that. Complainers.

At some point it’s time to take a good hard look in the mirror and say “Gee. What can *I* do differently? How can I evolve/change/grow? How can I modify my attitude or expectations?” AND

What can I really have dominion over?

Answer: Yourself. Your attitude. Your beliefs.

Think about that.

Aren’t we told that if something isn’t making you happy or adding value to your life to get rid of whatever it is? That’s what I’ve been doing and I’m happy.

 

[BackInTheGame78]

What do you think I’m doing by choosing not to play the game???

Sitting on the sideline watching life pass you by, hiding from it.

 

[corrector]

Sitting on the sideline watching life pass you by, thinking you can hide from it all.

That is easy to say for you if you are bringing a volume of women back at home. If you miss out on that, then YOU would be letting your life pass you by. To others, there is no real life to watch pass by because there is no opportunity cost. The black pill is to provide comfort by saying there is zero opportunity cost other than frustration, disappointment and pain and it's just negative so you are better off doing something else that is either fun or not depressing. You have "the blackpill's" permission to enjoy your life. But if there is an opportunity cost, then woe is you.

 

[BackInTheGame78]

That is easy to say for you if you are bringing a volume of women back at home. If you miss out on that, then YOU would be letting your life pass you by. To others, there is no real life to watch pass by because there is no opportunity cost. The black pill is to provide comfort by saying there is zero opportunity cost other than frustration, disappointment and pain and it's just negative so you are better off doing something else that is either fun or not depressing. You have "the blackpill's" permission to enjoy your life. But if there is an opportunity cost, then woe is you.

It's taking the easy way out by pretending you don't care.

 

[corrector]

It's taking the easy way out by pretending you don't care.

You get the impression with some (not speaking about you specifically) members that if they lost their looks, or weren't able to get women or turned incel they'd be devastated and commit suicide because their life would be unbearable. That's not how I define value with my life.

 

[Barrister]

You get the impression with some (not speaking about you specifically) members that if they lost their looks, or weren't able to get women or turned incel they'd be devastated and commit suicide because their life would be unbearable. That's not how I define value with my life.

The reverse is true as well though. Some posters on here try to say “I don’t care at all about women. I’m focused on MY life and what I want and things are so much better/simpler without having to worry about women.” It’s great to be focused on yourself. You should do that whether pursuing women or otherwise. But to act like anyone who gets in the sack with a female had to work so hard to do it and at the expense of themselves is just false. I also think this is generally some defense mechanism to say this for people who are not having a lot of success with women.

Building up a good rotation can take some time - but it’s like anything in life. You put time into what you are interested in.

 

[rjc149]

I didn’t blackpill myself. Women black pilled me

Self-help gurus would have a fvcking field day with this.

You choose to be black pill. That is why you are. It's not because you have been black pilled by something lying in an external locus of control. You are not a victim of women. Don't be so pathetic. It's not what women have done to you. It's what you have allowed them to do to you, how you choose to feel about it, and how you've chosen to proceed.

Instead of using your experiences with women to improve yourself and increase your wisdom on dating, you've chosen to be angry and petulant about it. Like that kid screaming "I QUIT!" when he's losing a Connect 4 game. Instead of the kid who learns from that game, and is eager to use his new experience on the next game, because he enjoys Connect 4, win or lose.

you won’t find me online dating, you won’t find what going out the bars or the club, I’m flying under the radar basically.

This is all well and fine. It's okay to take a break, a tactical withdrawal sometimes. But you also post a lot of pathetic incel bullsh!t. Your anger and misogyny isn't subtle.

 

[corrector]

But to act like anyone who gets in the sack with a female had to work so hard to do it and at the expense of themselves is just false.

There was a claim made like that? That's not even part of black-pill logic. There are people who have it very difficult with women, people who have it super-easy, and the in-betweens to have to put some work and expense into it but the pay-off at the end is a net benefit. If you are not in the category that has it super-easy then it is going to be hard.

Based on the OP, @Robert28 posts, assuming they are either very obese or sub-5 in looks after gym-maxxing and looks-maxxing, then they are not going to have an easy time in the dating market. That category of people will have it very hard and at the expense of themselves and their self-esteem.

 

[2Rocky]

I have been in monk mode for almost 1 year now. During this time I completed my studies and got my dream job. But now after staying away from dating for so long, I am much happier and content with staying single that i dont feel like dating anymore. Is that normal? Or am i going crazy?

Build your friend circle. Forget about dating women. Create meaningful platonic relationships with people who elevate you.

I'm guessing you are starved for a common goal and interest since you have been building your career. Time to become more well rounded.

 

[Robert28]

Self-help gurus would have a fvcking field day with this.

You choose to be black pill. That is why you are. It's not because you have been black pilled by something lying in an external locus of control. You are not a victim of women. Don't be so pathetic. It's not what women have done to you. It's what you have allowed them to do to you, how you choose to feel about it, and how you've chosen to proceed.

Instead of using your experiences with women to improve yourself and increase your wisdom on dating, you've chosen to be angry and petulant about it. Like that kid screaming "I QUIT!" when he's losing a Connect 4 game. Instead of the kid who learns from that game, and is eager to use his new experience on the next game, because he enjoys Connect 4, win or lose.


This is all well and fine. It's okay to take a break, a tactical withdrawal sometimes. But you also post a lot of pathetic incel bullsh!t. Your anger and misogyny isn't subtle.

You and I are never going to see eye to eye. You’re from NJ/NYC I’m from the south. We would not even go after the same types of women. I might be misogynistic to you but now I know why you think I am. You’re surrounded by feminist and everything you do gets labeled misogynistic by them.

 

[Robert28]

Sitting on the sideline watching life pass you by, hiding from it.

Just because I’m not pursuing or dating women you think life is passing me by??? That shows the importance you place on women and succeeding with them, which is fine because I used to be that way too.

 

[Jake_Gyllenhaal69]

You and I are never going to see eye to eye. You’re from NJ/NYC I’m from the south. We would not even go after the same types of women. I might be misogynistic to you but now I know why you think I am. You’re surrounded by feminist and everything you do gets labeled misogynistic by them.

you must live in some small village without running water and electricity because there’s plenty of feminists in the south lol

 

[deadmasterx]

Low T?

The higher it is the less you feel like dealing with women at all.

 

[BackInTheGame78]

Just because I’m not pursuing or dating women you think life is passing me by??? That shows the importance you place on women and succeeding with them, which is fine because I used to be that way too.

It's about balance. You cannot be balanced when you shut off a vital part of humanness. Anyone who claims sex isn't a basic human need is kidding themselves

 

[2Rocky]

It's about balance. You cannot be balanced when you shut off a vital part of humanness. Anyone who claims sex isn't a basic human need is kidding themselves

 

[AttackFormation]

Your perspective is certainly needed and welcomed for balance.

Looking out through the window a week or so ago, i saw a couple who appeared to genuinely care for each other. It was too far away for me to see their faces properly, but the man looked like just a normal skinny young guy.

They were in the process of saying goodbye as he was on his bike, but they dragged it out for minutes as the woman kept touching him with what looked to me like genuine fondness, while they slowly moved forward. She repeatedly took his hand, embraced and kissed him. She appeared happy to be with him... and when he rode off on his bike, she stayed and watched him, waving goodbye repeatedly. I couldnt see what she looked like except her long brown hair, as her back was turned to me. All i could see was the affection or maybe even love that they seemed to share...

I thought that me observing them was like being in a solemn movie scene.

 

[Robert28]

you must live in some small village without running water and electricity because there’s plenty of feminists in the south lol

Oh we have our share trust me lol

 

[Robert28]

It's about balance. You cannot be balanced when you shut off a vital part of humanness. Anyone who claims sex isn't a basic human need is kidding themselves

That I agree with! But when one part (pursuing sex) overtakes other aspects of your life that’s where the balance gets thrown off. The whole point of this thread is it’s not easy to get sex for most guys, it is for some but not most.

 

[corrector]

It's about balance. You cannot be balanced when you shut off a vital part of humanness. Anyone who claims sex isn't a basic human need is kidding themselves

That sounds like a great slogan to put on an escort-ad.

 

[Barrister]

There was a claim made like that? That's not even part of black-pill logic. There are people who have it very difficult with women, people who have it super-easy, and the in-betweens to have to put some work and expense into it but the pay-off at the end is a net benefit. If you are not in the category that has it super-easy then it is going to be hard.

Based on the OP, @Robert28 posts, assuming they are either very obese or sub-5 in looks after gym-maxxing and looks-maxxing, then they are not going to have an easy time in the dating market. That category of people will have it very hard and at the expense of themselves and their self-esteem.

Actually, yes. Scroll back a few pages. I am exaggerating a bit - but the claim was made that it was “very difficult” for most men to get sex. And, again, yes looks are important. Doesn’t mean a guy who is average or below average can’t pull women though.