Doc Love Is Crazy and if You Follow His Advice, You Are Too!

Blue Phoenix

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Guys, I came across this blog bashing Doc Love:

I am very familiar with Doc Love through his work on the website AskMen.Com, and for several years I've posted my criticism of his theories and belief systems about women and how men can be successful with them. Basically he attempts to label and categorize women's emotional response so that men can use logic and exhibit the "appriopriate" behaviors to gain control of the relationship and the woman. In my mind, the things Doc Love proposes men do to "get" a woman are ridiculous games, full of pretense, and unworthy of a true man with solid confidence seeking a woman of similar character.
Article:
http://www.askheartbeat.com/index.php?option=com_content&task=view&id=274&Itemid=36

Listen to the woman talking:
http://www.blogtalkradio.com/askhea...y-and-if-You-Follow-His-Teachings-You-Are-Too

Guys what do you think??
 

reset

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That's a chick. Of course she's going to not like Doc Love.

Advice is good until you can trust your own advice. Some things he says I agree with, some I don't, mainly, a girl with high interest never playing games. But his stuff on challenge, is spot on in my opinion.
 

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I've heard the show. I actually started reading his articles on askmen and decided to buy the System, which I haven't finished yet.

I like how he uses humor, and how he tells men to do what we say here, keep it light, have fun, be a challenge, and wait to see all the red flags before you make any sort of commitment.

This chick's article is just proof it works.

But again, the part I disagree with is that women with high interest will never play games. We know that girls don't know why they do what they do, it just happens. They challenge the guy, too. They set tests because they want to see if your masculinity is for real. Doesn't mean they aren't interested. But overall I like his style.

Edit--I skimmed this article, and what is funny is she seems to ONLY talk about how long a guy waits to call. That's so minor. I believe he says, don't call soon, because he wants you to adopt that prize mentality. It's not that you don't call, it's that you emulate the natural who just naturally has a lot going on in his life. Maybe he'll call maybe he won't. But he's not sitting by the phone with a stop-watch wondering when the right time is.

You're testing HER for interest. She may just really enjoy giving out phone numbers. Does she remember you a week later? 5 days later or whatever it is? It's about you qualifying HER, not worrying that she'll get mad if you don't call. Flip it around.
 

Phyzzle

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Written by Deborrah Cooper
Isn't that all you need to know?

His posts on the front page here are getting pretty sporadic, but you still see them sometimes.
 

young_gun

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I like Doc Love's posts. He puts good content in them, but he seriously has an uncle or a cousin who says EVERYTHING. And it's always a different "Cousin Bob Love" or whatever. The cheese factor is definitely there, but there is good content in the articles he writes.
 

Corona

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Doc love works if you're trying to pick up desperate women in their 30s.

Hot, young women -- Not so much.
 

DJDamage

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If you are an AFC and you have no game, Doc Love is somewhat of an awakening. He gives you a kick in the ass in terms of reality check, of what a man suppose to do in order to be a challenge to women (as opposed to a wuss) while encouraging you to not waste your time on low interest women.

However he is only scratching the surface and requires you to buy his program so you can be depended on it.
 

LovelyLady

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Doc Love's basic premises:
  • men need to have qualities of masculine confidence, control and challenge.
  • women need to have feminine qualities of integrity, be giving and flexible.
  • a good relationship has respect, affection, romance, humor
.

He does put focus on the man staying aware and awake in his relating to women, but how he chooses to interpret women themselves shows a lack of understanding the inner workings of women.

Reading his stuff is like talking to a man who has an intellectual understanding of what a relationship is supposed to look like - but also a man who is inexperienced at actually having ever been truly intimately, actively involved in a genuine loving relationship.

He offers advice on how to "next" a woman - but he offers little insight on to how to successfully connect and build a relationship with one.

I also find his descriptions of how men and women relate a bit juvenile. He holds as his baseline/standard the emotionally immature individual and makes over-simplified generalizations about complex human interactions and "types" of people.

He advocates the constant "taking of the temperature" of a woman's interest level - which allows little room for spontaneity and comfort in just being with a man and enjoying him. The men who date using his system as their primary guide are pretty easy to spot - they are over-sensitive to every nuance you make and always need reassurance about the smallest things - and get panicy if you do not give them your attention at all times. God forbid in the middle of talking with them you have to tend to your child - or an unexpected business call on call-waiting! You must not be interested in him! NEXT!

There is such a fearbased focus on avoiding rejection - that the potential for genuine connecting is sabatoged with a constant focus on the amount of attention a woman gives a man. The system equates attention with love rather than genuine intimacy and relating.

Some of the things he advocates to develop self-discipline in his readers actually reak of insecurity and a lack of the men to act on their own judgement. His writing has the basic energy of: "Trust my (and my Uncle's, and "Sal the Fish's" and the other personas I have created) judgement - but don't trust your own or you will be dumped!"

He puts great emphasis on a woman's early interest level - without a discussion about how a healthy woman is not actually going to drop everything for a man she has early interest in. Healthy women watch and wait and get to know a man before they offer a great deal of flexibilty to him and his needs. A healthy woman does not give her love indiscriminately - any more than a healthy man does. There is almost an absence of his understanding that there is a process of mutual "qualifying" that needs to take place for a healthy relationship to be built.

I will still give this to my son when he is older as a tool for discussion - but it will be read with real discrimination. It will be read with the understanding that this is not written by a man with a deep understanding of the inner life of women or the truly complex nature of romantic human interaction and intimacy, but rather by a man who has not yet moved beyond the basic flashcard understanding of the language of love.

****
That's my book review :D
 
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C-quenced

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He does put focus on the man staying aware and awake in his relating to women, but how he chooses to interpret women themselves shows a lack of understanding the inner workings of women.

What makes you so understanding of the inner workings of women, besides the fact that you're a woman yourself? As far as I know women don't even understand themselves especially when it comes to matters of the opposite sex. I know you won't agree with me but it's a fact.

Reading his stuff is like talking to a man who has an intellectual understanding of what a relationship is supposed to look like - but also a man who is inexperienced at actually having ever been truly intimately, actively involved in a genuine loving relationship.

He offers advice on how to "next" a woman - but he offers little insight on to how to successfully connect and build a relationship with one.

I also find his descriptions of how men and women relate a bit juvenile. He holds as his baseline/standard the emotionally immature individual and makes over-simplified generalizations about complex human interactions and "types" of people.

He advocates the constant "taking of the temperature" of a woman's interest level - which allows little room for spontaneity and comfort in just being with a man and enjoying him. The men who date using his system as their primary guide are pretty easy to spot - they are over-sensitive to every nuance you make and always need reassurance about the smallest things - and get panicy if you do not give them your attention at all times. God forbid in the middle of talking with them you have to tend to your child - or an unexpected business call on call-waiting! You must not be interested in him! NEXT!


While I may not agree with all of his concepts I must admit that Doc Love knows his stuff and is on target about 90% percent of the time. When I follow his advice things almost always goes well for me. What other explanation is there for that? I think you've been reading too far into something you don't understand therefore you developed some fantasy radar for "spotting" the men who use his system. Just because a man shows a similiar attitude to his principles doesn't mean that he must be reading up on Doc Love. Also Qualities such as over-sensitivity, insecurity etc. are actually contrary to his teachings. I just find it rather ironic that you highly disagree with him yet those men who have mastered his principles or are naturals at this game are the same men who you would respond positively to.

There is such a fearbased focus on avoiding rejection - that the potential for genuine connecting is sabatoged with a constant focus on the amount of attention a woman gives a man. The system equates attention with love rather than genuine intimacy and relating.

Some of the things he advocates to develop self-discipline in his readers actually reak of insecurity and a lack of the men to act on their own judgement. His writing has the basic energy of: "Trust my (and my Uncle's, and "Sal the Fish's" and the other personas I have created) judgement - but don't trust your own or you will be dumped!"

He puts great emphasis on a woman's early interest level - without a discussion about how a healthy woman is not actually going to drop everything for a man she has early interest in. Healthy women watch and wait and get to know a man before they offer a great deal of flexibilty to him and his needs. A healthy woman does not give her love indiscriminately - any more than a healthy man does. There is almost an absence of his understanding that there is a process of mutual "qualifying" that needs to take place for a healthy relationship to be built.

I will still give this to my son when he is older as a tool for discussion - but it will be read with real discrimination. It will be read with the understanding that this is not written by a man with a deep understanding of the inner life of women or the truly complex nature of romantic human interaction and intimacy, but rather by a man who has not yet moved beyond the basic flashcard understanding of the language of love.


Everything you say is entirely subjective. If you "feel" that men should act accordingly to their own judgement then why don't you let your son do the same well? I say give him the book and let him make his own decisions based on his (not your own) experience.

****
That's my book review


Thumbs down on this one.
 

LovelyLady

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C-quenced said:
...women don't even understand themselves especially when it comes to matters of the opposite sex.
Do you really believe this?
 

reset

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i do.
 

Latinoman

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C-quenced said:
As far as I know women don't even understand themselves especially when it comes to matters of the opposite sex. I know you won't agree with me but it's a fact.
Women know a LOT more than you give them credit. They know sex is the key to get men. They know attention (not necessary sex) could be enough to get men. They know that dressing a certain way...a smile...etc. might be enough to get men.

Underestimating women is not a smart thing to do.
 

Interceptor

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What makes you so understanding of the inner workings of women, besides the fact that you're a woman yourself?
Good question.
Lovely Lady is a woman whom has spent a great deal of time understanding herself and relationships,and the male/female dynamics. Far more than the average SoSuaver. She is indeed very well informed and quite capable of offering excellent insight into subjects like these. She has made deep observations derived from personal experience, and gained insight from others expereinces as well.
She is very understanding of the subject matter.
I highly respect her insight.



As far as I know women don't even understand themselves especially when it comes to matters of the opposite sex. I know you won't agree with me but it's a fact.
Women know what they want as much as men do.

Which means that just like women, some men dont know who they are or what they want.
You're making a vast generalizaton about women, when it also applies to men as well.
Some men knowo what they want, some women do too.

This is a non point. Sorry.


While I may not agree with all of his concepts I must admit that Doc Love knows his stuff and is on target about 90% percent of the time. When I follow his advice things almost always goes well for me. What other explanation is there for that?


My take is that it does work , but only because there are certain concepts that will work anyway. Regardless if it came from Doc Love's System or not.
I am sure that Lovely Lady is quite aware of the things that DO work to gain her interest and attraction in a romantic relationship.

Ultimately ALL of this comes down to Calibration.
How well one calibrates the 'tactics' comes down to your level of savvy and social adjustment, and of course, your ability to read the romantic interactions with a woman.
Saying a crass joke at the wrong time, or being unavailable at the wrong time, or calling too little are all examples of poor calibration to the woman's frequency, the way SHE relates to men, and wants to be related to.
You can follow a 'tactic' and have poor timing or not know how to use it in moderation and you've blown the opportunity.





I think you've been reading too far into something you don't understand therefore you developed some fantasy radar for "spotting" the men who use his system.
I believe Lovely Lady is doing nothing of the kind.
She is quite adept at 'understanding' the male/female sexual and romantic dynamic. Plus, she has the added insight of seeing it from a woman's point of view.
She simply has a knack for reading the material and finding areas of weakness when it comes down to dealing with healthy, high self esteem , full grown and mature women.
That she can 'spot' men using 'tactics' on her speaks on her ability to tune into men and assess their motives and level of skill and confidence.
In other words, she's no fool, and not easily duped. No matter how many 'tactics' you use or try to justify.



Just because a man shows a similiar attitude to his principles doesn't mean that he must be reading up on Doc Love.
OK, but no one has a monopoly on the truth. Principles are independent of owning. No one can own these principles.
What ultimately matters is the intent behind them ,and the character quality of the man.


Also Qualities such as over-sensitivity, insecurity etc. are actually contrary to his teachings.
They are. However, you're not seeing that much of the advice is geared for men whom do not have authentic self esteem and self confidence, who deal with high self esteem,healthy and mature women.
Doc Love's System is a good starting point for men who are not used to being assertive and making and following their own rules. It gives them a place to refer to because of their lack of experience with women.
Some of it applies really well, most of the time, some of it doesnt.
The dating world is never linear or logical to an extreme sense.
So there cant be an over dependence on any rigid system or method.




I just find it rather ironic that you highly disagree with him yet those men who have mastered his principles or are naturals at this game are the same men who you would respond positively to.
I believe she is actually disagreeing from the perspective of what SHE values as being a fulfilling, deep, meaningful and intimate relationship.
So, yes, perhaps she does have higher standards than the women Doc Love may be geared to.
And considering that Lovely Lady has a sharp ability to detect insincerity and insecurity, she wouldn't respond positively to a 'tactic' performed inauthentically by an insecure and insincere man.
In essence, she may respond to a tactic, but if it is performed AS a 'tactic', and not an expression of a Man's true personality, there's probably not going to be a serious lasting effect on her.
I am sure that she's not disagreeing with the basic principles found in male/female romantic interactions.
women do feel better in the courtship ritual when done in proper sequence at the end of the day. So I dont think she has a problem with being 'courted' properly. And yes, that may mean not having to be 'perfect'.
For sometimes when something is too perfect, it may also be mistrusted.





Everything you say is entirely subjective.

This also applies to you.
You certainly do not represent EVERY Man's personal experience/opinion in life.

If you "feel" that men should act accordingly to their own judgement then why don't you let your son do the same well?

I believe because her son is still too young to make the most informed decisions on the subject.

I say give him the book and let him make his own decisions based on his (not your own) experience.
And you're entitled to your opinion. But it's her son, not yours. And the young man has little 'experience' to draw from.



To sum up, my belief is that Doc Love's Sytem has value.
It does address many issues and questions men have with regards to dating women.
It is not deep or as comprehensive. And it is somewhat oversimplified.

BUT... it IS helpful to men.

It IS something that helps men get pointed into the right direction.
One can only hope that as the man matures and gains insight and experience, he begins to recognize his value and principles and gives consideraton to experience something more meaningful if he so chooses, because he now CAN.
The deep meaningful relationship with strong healthy bonding and intimacy is Earned.

So as his skill grows, so may his sophisitication and desire for more information and new fulfilling experiences.
Ultimately the idea is to empower Men to have CHOICE with women.
And to buld the better life.
It is important to try to not be bound to a rigid system, and pay attention to the principles behind them.
 

Latinoman

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If LovelyLady was blond and with a hot body (or relatively hot body)...I would probably date her and waive the fact that I tend to be attracted to younger women.
 

Latinoman

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Of course...the fact I don't date women from the Internet would made the above statement an impossibility goes without saying.
 
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