Did I really give of this vibe or typical women's BS

[Comatozed]

Went on a date with some tinder girl last Friday. I thought it went well, kino'd which she reciprocated, had her back to mine but just kiss closed, tried to escalate a bit, nothing overly assertive just the standard.

Text her tuesday, short exchange that I ended, i thought great she responded probably get a second date... I asked her out last night after another 10 -15 min text convo.

She says 'I'm sure you can find someone more suited on tinder'...'I'm not a slut'.

Now, did I really (a previous AFC, still kinda nice guy at heart) somehow manage to be too forward and make her think I was looking for a slut, or is this a typical woman way of saying 'I don't want to see you again and I will tell you this by accusing you of only looking for a slut and I am not one'

I know to judge women by actions not words, and the action she has taken to my date proposal is not to accept. But, for future reference, what do you think? Women BS or I actually gave off that impression.

Oh and how did I play the exchange from here

bla bla
ME: Pick one, thursday or saturday (pick saturday).
HB7: Need to know what I'm picking
Me: When we next go out
HE7:Hmmm
ME:...
HB7: (After 6mins) I think you could definitly find someone better suited on tinder
HB7: I'm not a slut.
ME: What makes you think I'm looking for a slut. Anyway, sup to you. Take it or leave it. (wasn't sure if **** test?)
HB7: You kinda gave me that impression (dafuq?)
ME: Nah, I like to take things slow
HB7: Ok well I will let you know about Saturday
ME: Ok. The sooner the better. Cya later.

The whole 'I will let you know' is obv a bad sign - should I have just said 'nah leave it then' - i didn't want to burn any bridges in the case she was being genuine thinking I was just after a ****.

The girl had said before I met her the first time she wasn't going to sleep with me and has made reference to me having 'other tinder girls' - but tbh she hardly seems the innocent type. I think she probably WAS looking to be someones slut on date 1 but I missed my chance. Basically I think it's the exact opposite of what she is saying but who knows.

Honestly man these girls are starting to do my head in. I can see why you guys stack dates and no ****s given. Just ignore my message after date 1 if you have no intention of taking it any further you dumb broad, why would you reply, what did she think was happening.

EDIT: It's def bull****. There's no way she wouldn't not see me again just cos she thought that. Nothing I did could possibly have given her that impression, if i was looking for a slut would I have text her again after I didnt get any date 1? NO. Sigh. Chick logic.

 

[Shift]

Just let it play out, she might have a valid reason for being unsure on the day, ( i.e. she might not know her work/school schedule for that day yet), or it could be BS. Don't contact her unless she contacts you first, and if you don't hear from her by Saturday, NEXT HER. Don't get too hung up on it and talk to other girls in the meantime.

 

[Comatozed]

Already nexted her in my mind mate (Y), not expecting her to actually 'let me know'.

Half tempted to say nah I made other plans in the unlikely event she does message saying she wants to go out to tbh. I already feel she's trying to take the frame. Not happening.

 

[LMFAO]

So she said that I'm not a slut line out of no where after you asked her out, and she said the same thing before the first date?

It's a reputational preservation used by more experience girls a lot of the time, who did fvck many guys in the past. I would use the same sh!t on her and tell her you're not a slut either. Or she could just be traumatised by guys who pumped and dumped her, fvck knows. Either way there's something wrong with her.

You didn't do anything wrong she just sounds mentally unstable. Doubt you'll hear from her again.

 

[Comatozed]

Yea she said it just before date 1 via text. 'Ok see you at 8pm. I'm not going to sleep with you unfortunately...'

to which i replied 'wow slow down i don't even kiss til date 5'

then she said 'i'm not going to sleep with you' whilst drunk on my bed. I really don't know if she was trying to convince herself or what haha, she also said we weren't going back to mine but she followed me back anyway so..

She did give off a kind of mentally unstable vibe, but I couldn't tell if she was just a bit ditsy, she's not a retard but not the brightest either.

I just refuse to believe she thinks i'm a player and she's the innocent one, not a chance. I'm sure at one point I even said I'm tired of casual sex.

I'm mainly annoyed confused because usually they just go ghost, they don't flip it like i'm some slayer and they're the innocent one, making me question if I was too forward. Cos my issue is more likely not being forward enough.

The more I think of it the more I think she's a slut, but fml if I get slut to my bed and don't **** her.

you can't logic these chicks but I felt like saying 'ok you're not a slut, if I was looking for a slut why would I offer you a second date after no sex?'

 

[Jair213]

Lol i wouldnt even take her seriously to watever shes saying..

shes playing dumb and she knows this all to well..

the more tension and uncomfortable she seems to be the easier is gonna be to fvck her
she sounds stupid af though chicks like this could be annoying af

 

[Donaldinho]

I wouldn't bank on her replying. Make other plans and if she does text you, tell her "too late, already made plans".
If she doesn't text you, but you text her that out of the blue, it'll seem needy.
And if you do go out with her again, try to pound it and if she pulls the "I'm no slut" crap again, drop her.
She's a slut btw, if she has to say it, multiple times no less.

 

[Comatozed]

Your reply should've been:

"What happens on Tinder, stays on Tinder."

We don't need to 'explain' ourselves to women.

She lost all respect for you when you supplicated and tried to explain yourself to her.

Step up to the plate and hit the ball back next time.

At which point would you have said that? After 'I'm not a slut'?.. IDK where it would fit.

I was aware of not explaining or supplicating. I think I avoided that well enough with 'take it or leave it' my mindset was 'im not getting into this silly **** about who or who isn't a slut, either come out with me on saturday or don't'. At no point was I willing or trying to explain myself. I maybe veered towards getting HER to explain why she said I gave that impression, but no explanations on my part.

the ' i like to take things slow' line wasn't serious or expected to be taken as an explanation, much like when I said I don't kiss till date 5 previously, just throwing her 'im not a slut' **** back at her. Agree and amplify and all that.

If i could replay it i'd go for a 'lol whatever, let me know about saturday' after 'that's the impression you gave' rather than 'nah I like to take things slow' - but that was a joke, i'd **** her tonight if she was down.

 

[sylvester the cat]

The 'action' she took was responding to your text. Never mind what she said.

 

[Epimanes]

It was a shyt test... You failed.

Next.

 

[nismo-4]

Your princess is in another castle. Sorry.

 

[Jaylan]

Granted I haven't been on many Tinder meets (only met a few girls), I've had all my meets end with sex somewhere down the line. Some started right away with sex, others took a little while.

With every girl though, I always built a considerable amount of rapport and tension through text first. And then on the dates I just acted like a normal dude, and flirted a little, but nothing to over the top. Tbh, I treated the chicks as a friend I could be myself around, but made sure I flirted some so it was obvious I was into them.

Honestly, I find that the first kiss is what helps the girl determine is she will sleep with you. Its like that cherry on top to all the previously built tension.

Anyways, the way I would have replied to your chick's slut comment, is to sincerely ask "what would have given you that impression? I wouldn't ask you out again if I thought of you as a slut. So if you're up for it, let me know how Saturday works for you"

I feel that works a lot better than the "take it or leave it" which can come off as pushy and butthurt.

 

[Comatozed]

Yea using text the tone is impossible to get across, I wasn't butt hurt at all it was meant to be like 'look girl, idgaf either come or don't, you're one of like 5 girls I could ask out for Saturday'

Interesting take Sylvester, i didn't think of it like that. So her responding means she's at least somewhat interested, possibly seeking attention though.

PLOT TWIST: She's just messaged me this minute actually with 'I checked my schedule, I think I'm free tmr night '

How to respond? Not thrilled at 'think' - she's controlling the frame here and I can either next her or see her and aim to escalate really fast and next if she doesn't like it. Don't really wna pull her up on it though cos that looks needy. I will just say 'Ok great see you at 8pm'?

I was gonna take this girl bowling to get her drunk on vodka we would sneak in but nah that's too much effort now. Though that method is still cheaper than bar hopping.

We all still thinking she's 100% slut, any tests I can do?, i think she is but slight chance she's actually not.

 

[:-)]

We all still thinking she's 100% slut, any tests I can do?, i think she is but slight chance she's actually not.

Go to stick your d1ck in her. If she offers no resistance, she's a slut.

 

[LMFAO]

"Cool, tmrw at <x> location at <y> pm, see you then "

Take her out close to your place or hers and escalate to sex.

 

[Comatozed]

Tbf ****ing on the second date doesn't make her a slut by societies standards anyway.

What do I say when she inevitably says 'im not a slut im not sleeping with you' again? On my bed at this point. Just ignore and proceed or pull back and say ok w/e you should leave I need to be up early?

 

[LMFAO]

What do I say when she inevitably says 'im not a slut im not sleeping with you' again? On my bed at this point. Just ignore and proceed or pull back and say ok w/e you should leave I need to be up early?

You may need to cut through the s*** with her.

If sex doesn't happen with her for whatever reason and you're on the bed then pull back and tell her this:
"We have awesome conversations, and you're great… you're really pretty and smart and cool to talk to and maybe if we don’t have the kind of chemistry with each other where we can’t keep our hands off of each other, then maybe we really should be just friends…and that’s OK."

She will probably respond that it's not that she doesn't like you but that she's had bad experience before, again tell her you understand and you like her as well but you can just be friends if no such chemistry and you can introduce her to your guy friends. She will then probably change the subject and you'll be banging her within 5 minutes.

Women hate nothing more than being told by a guy they're interested in that they should just be friends (or not even friends) and it will strip her off all validation which she'll be looking to get back.

 

[Comatozed]

Good post.

I've had some success with the ljbf approach in the past.

I once said 'Unfortunately I don't think you have the self-esteem issues needed to sleep with me for the amount of effort i'm prepared to put in, you can be my pretty friend I use to make the less pretty girls jealous'

Threw her off guard somewhat, she was flattered I thought she was pretty and wondering if I genuinely did just want to be friends.

 

[skinnyguy]

Translation: "I'm actually a slut, just not attracted to you anymore".

 

[Comatozed]

How do I make my game tighter? More push/pull, ****y funny stuff? IDK, date went well.

I will try again Saturday, I still think she's gonna flake tbh, she seems the type.The fact she took a whole day to say she 'thinks' she is free is so flakey.