Did I freak my secretary out?

[TheGambino]

More likely she said "my boss is harassing me" and they told her to make an excuse to avoid being alone with you whilst she looks for another job and/or a lawyer.

Agreed. The part that people (some) don't see is that it was the OP HIMSELF who bought the leash,put it on himself,handed the chick the handle,then got down on all fours awaiting commands.

This chick hasn't done one thing wrong here........NOT ONE.

And I challenge anyone here to find any wrongdoing in all this mess on HER part.

Why are you worried about whether you "freaked her out" - unless you're worried about being sued or fired, which requires a different set of advice.

Otherwise: Who cares? You are operating outside your own frame. You can either carry on and forget it, or isolate her and make a move. Just keep in mind she may be worried about her livelihood, it is a mitigating factor and you are putting yourself in a dangerous spot because of the work dynamic. Everyone here warned you.

If you truly don't care about that then like I said, isolate, kiss. Whether her IL is obvious or not, you'll get your answer.

EDIT. I am speaking from experience here. Though I have a steady plate and am always meeting new women, there are at least a couple I know who I think are attracted to me, but it's not obvious. Yet I acknowledge I can't know unless I finally isolate and make a move. I can evaluate signs and post threads til the cows come home, but only a move will get me rejected or in their pants. There's nothing wrong with having a harmless flirt-buddy, it can be a fun distraction, but without escalation that's all she is.

You really think? That would suck! Yet again we always work together alone on thursdays and my colleague is going to take off next week so she is going to be alone with me anyway. If she’s really freaked out she’s going to quit but she said she’s coming to work this Saturday if she feels good Friday. Its possible but I don’t think so because she always asked me what I’m up to the next day in the evenings. So interested in my personal life. I think that she loves her ex .. and he’s back and that’s it

 

[bat soup]

You really think? That would suck! Yet again we always work together alone on thursdays and my colleague is going to take off next week so she is going to be alone with me anyway. If she’s really freaked out she’s going to quit but she said she’s coming to work this Saturday if she feels better Friday. Its possible but I don’t think so because she always asked me what I’m up to the next day in the evenings. So interested in my personal life. I think that she loves her ex .. and he’s back and that’s it

Talk is cheap, especially from women. Where's the action?

Excuses are a classic sign of disinterest, no matter how plausible.

 

[TheGambino]

Talk is cheap, especially from women. Where's the action?

Excuses are a classic sign of disinterest, no matter how plausible.

Bro you need to understand the next things very clearly before making conclusions.

- She calls me a real man
- She found out I was fvcking a plate when my colleague asked about her and she heared it. She reacted; when? Months ago right? Only two weeks ago, looking at me a bit mad.
- We flirted heavily everyday and the chemistry is awesome. She becomes feminine around me and I don’t lose frame. Heavy masculine.
- she laughs at every joke shows strong iois. I know she is/was attracted but her ex came back and now she is like okay this situation changed!
- I make her feel, funny, mad, angry, happy, corny. She says that also. I push pull and play her.
- she told me she can be herself around me and giggled and lolled like she never had some times around me.

I had the chance to fvck her as her rebound, I just know it but since he’s back in her life it’s different. She still is interested if I see women. She asks.

Yet again her ex is back and then the signals became mixed.

That is what it is.

 

[Glassguy]

Agreed. The part that people (some) don't see is that it was the OP HIMSELF who bought the leash,put it on himself,handed the chick the handle,then got down on all fours awaiting commands.

This chick hasn't done one thing wrong here........NOT ONE.

And I challenge anyone here to find any wrongdoing in all this mess on HER part.

Absolutely.

Men cant be strung along, misinterpreted or confused if they just follow a simple process:

1.) Invite the chick to join for a drink and make it clear what the drink intentions are.....its not to be friends/coworkers, etc
2.) Chick meets for a drink
3.) If there is a vibe, escalate.
4.) Smash said chick

Wash, rinse and repeat.

If at ANY time the chick hits the brakes and this process doesnt go smoothly, you eject. If you dont, that is when the man is CHASING. Man offers invitation, woman accepts OR counter offers with a specific time she is free. Anything else, its deuces.

OP never even got to step one. Yet for weeks he has been trapped inside his own mind wondering about this chick.

Most issues with mixed signals are from the following:
-Man doesnt make a move (See #1)
-Man doesnt accept a woman's covert rejection

This chick OP is referring to has made it clear that she has a bf, how much she loves the challenge the bf presents to her, has never made sexual physical contact with OP and all of a sudden its the chick's fault? Now she is a bytch?

OP failed to lead it to a date. He did so because he had already set himself up for failure by hiring a chick to do a job when he clearly only hired her to try to get in her pants. I have not heard OP say that she is a poor employee......so she is holding up her end of the bargain there as well. Why in tf would you be so immature as to hire someone just because you want to sleep with them? That shows a weak frame and LACK OF OPTIONS.
OP I dont care what you say. Your weekly "changing myself" threads and the constant threads about these chicks you get totally hung up on and confused by means you have a scarcity mindset.

And I dont believe for one second that you slept with 200 chicks. Spare me. I see a weak framed little man who gets hung up on every girl that gives him a slight bit of validation (and even the ones that dont).

I often wonder what you really did with all that time where you disappeared to "work on yourself". It doesnt seem that you have learned much in your years and years here.

Again, just stating what is obvious to most posters on here. I think a lot of people are tired of handling certain ones with white gloves.

 

[bat soup]

Bro you need to understand the next things very clearly before making conclusions.

- She calls me a real man
- She found out I was fvcking a plate when my colleague asked about her and she heared it. She reacted; when? Months ago right? Only two weeks ago, looking at me a bit mad.
- We flirted heavily everyday and the chemistry is awesome. She becomes feminine around me and I don’t lose frame. Heavy masculine.
- she laughs at every joke shows strong iois. I know she is/was attracted but her ex came back and now she is like okay this situation changed!
- I make her feel, funny, mad, angry, happy, corny. She says that also. I push pull and play her.
- she told me she can be herself around me and giggled and lolled like she never had some times around me.

I had the chance to fvck her as her rebound, I just know it but since he’s back in her life it’s different. She still is interested if I see women. She asks.

Yet again her ex is back and then the signals became mixed.

That is what it is.

All of that counts as talk. What has she actually done for you? Has she even touched you?

 

[Glassguy]

She calls me a real man
- She found out I was fvcking a plate when my colleague asked about her and she heared it. She reacted; when? Months ago right? Only two weeks ago, looking at me a bit mad.
- We flirted heavily everyday and the chemistry is awesome. She becomes feminine around me and I don’t lose frame. Heavy masculine.
- she laughs at every joke shows strong iois. I know she is/was attracted but her ex came back and now she is like okay this situation changed!
- I make her feel, funny, mad, angry, happy, corny. She says that also. I push pull and play her.
- she told me she can be herself around me and giggled and lolled like she never had some times around me.

Yeah? How is the sex?

Thats what I thought.

No idea why this thread still exists.

 

[TheGambino]

All of that counts as talk. What has she actually done for you? Has she even touched you?

If she wasn’t my secretary.

“Hey drinks at my place tonight?”

Fvck it.

 

[bat soup]

If she wasn’t my secretary.

“Hey drinks at my place tonight?”

Fvck it.

You don't need to go from 0 to 100 in 3 seconds. You're her boss, so inviting her to your place would be inappropriate.

But what about inviting her out for a drink?

 

[TheGambino]

You don't need to go from 0 to 100 in 3 seconds. You're her boss, so inviting her to your place would be inappropriate.

But what about inviting her out for a drink?

She mentioned it herself. She said I want to go to the restaurant we went to 2 months ago. We went to my administrator and went for dinner. We had so much fun and she said that she wanted to go again with me. Its corona now.. it’s closed.

 

[TheGambino]

Absolutely.

Men cant be strung along, misinterpreted or confused if they just follow a simple process:

1.) Invite the chick to join for a drink and make it clear what the drink intentions are.....its not to be friends/coworkers, etc
2.) Chick meets for a drink
3.) If there is a vibe, escalate.
4.) Smash said chick

Wash, rinse and repeat.

If at ANY time the chick hits the brakes and this process doesnt go smoothly, you eject. If you dont, that is when the man is CHASING. Man offers invitation, woman accepts OR counter offers with a specific time she is free. Anything else, its deuces.

OP never even got to step one. Yet for weeks he has been trapped inside his own mind wondering about this chick.

Most issues with mixed signals are from the following:
-Man doesnt make a move (See #1)
-Man doesnt accept a woman's covert rejection

This chick OP is referring to has made it clear that she has a bf, how much she loves the challenge the bf presents to her, has never made sexual physical contact with OP and all of a sudden its the chick's fault? Now she is a bytch?

OP failed to lead it to a date. He did so because he had already set himself up for failure by hiring a chick to do a job when he clearly only hired her to try to get in her pants. I have not heard OP say that she is a poor employee......so she is holding up her end of the bargain there as well. Why in tf would you be so immature as to hire someone just because you want to sleep with them? That shows a weak frame and LACK OF OPTIONS.
OP I dont care what you say. Your weekly "changing myself" threads and the constant threads about these chicks you get totally hung up on and confused by means you have a scarcity mindset.

And I dont believe for one second that you slept with 200 chicks. Spare me. I see a weak framed little man who gets hung up on every girl that gives him a slight bit of validation (and even the ones that dont).

I often wonder what you really did with all that time where you disappeared to "work on yourself". It doesnt seem that you have learned much in your years and years here.

Again, just stating what is obvious to most posters on here. I think a lot of people are tired of handling certain ones with white gloves.

Classguy. I have to defend myself here. I only post about the women that don’t work out like I want too. I never post my success like you do. Yes, I also have dates, I also reject women I had a lay this Friday and I nexted her because she doesn’t attract me enough. I had another girl two weeks ago in my bed and moved on also. She’s clingy and texts me Everyday how I rocked her night with emoticons and all that, hearts and so on.

When I write a thread it’s about a failure classguy. I don’t write about the other women I fvck date or next that don’t interest me.

Im no weak man I went from 0 to a big business with a turnover of 1,5 million euros. All men respect me, my clients respect me. I am strength.

This girl just got me caught up because her feminine submissiveness I love. I’m not on your level of abundance but you cant tell me I’m weak.

 

[Glassguy]

Whatever you say Gambino.

 

[TheGambino]

Whatever you say Gambino.

I have to admit I’m nowhere near your level. But I’m working on it, I still catch weak spots for some women every 3 years, working on it. I think samspade is actually on point with his post. That’s what it is. Shes only 20 and her ex is her first real boyfriend long relation. She isn’t capable of playing games so harsh she just started..

 

[BackInTheGame78]

Bro you need to understand the next things very clearly before making conclusions.

- She calls me a real man
- She found out I was fvcking a plate when my colleague asked about her and she heared it. She reacted; when? Months ago right? Only two weeks ago, looking at me a bit mad.
- We flirted heavily everyday and the chemistry is awesome. She becomes feminine around me and I don’t lose frame. Heavy masculine.
- she laughs at every joke shows strong iois. I know she is/was attracted but her ex came back and now she is like okay this situation changed!
- I make her feel, funny, mad, angry, happy, corny. She says that also. I push pull and play her.
- she told me she can be herself around me and giggled and lolled like she never had some times around me.

I had the chance to fvck her as her rebound, I just know it but since he’s back in her life it’s different. She still is interested if I see women. She asks.

Yet again her ex is back and then the signals became mixed.

That is what it is.

All of these are meaningless unless she ends up with your d1ck in her mouth. You have been here way too long to be rationalizing this stuff in this way bro...

Actions trump words always!

 

[Alvafe]

If she wasn’t my secretary.

“Hey drinks at my place tonight?”

Fvck it.

finally something you said made sense, "if she wans't your secretary", she is then stop overthinking about her, or fire her and invite her for a date, I bet you didn't even said in low key you would invite her to a date if she don't work for you.

you are not doing anything, just masturbating over a girl you are not banging

 

[BackInTheGame78]

I have to admit I’m nowhere near your level. But I’m working on it, I still catch weak spots for some women every 3 years, working on it. I think samspade is actually on point with his post. That’s what it is. Shes only 20 and her ex is her first real boyfriend long relation. She isn’t capable of playing games so harsh she just started..

Women are always capable of playing games, it's their nature. It would be like saying a spider isn't capable of spinning a web. They don't need anyone to teach them how, they just know how instinctively.

It's like the story of the frog and the scorpion...

There is a scorpion on the bank of a big river and it needs to cross. He sees a frog and asks him if he will take him to the other side.

The frog says "No way! You will sting me and I will die!"

The scorpion says "Why would I do that? If I do that we will both die!"

The frog thinks about it for a few minutes and says "You are right...it doesn't make any sense. Why would you do something that will kill us both?" He then agrees to take him across the river on his back.

Halfway through the frog feels a sharp pain on his back. He says to the scorpion "You fool! Why would you do that? Now we both will surely die!"

The scorpion looks at him and shrugs and says "I could not help it! It is in my nature!"

And that is how you must view women and playing games...they can't help it, it is in their nature...

 

[TheGambino]

Women are always capable of playing games, it's their nature. It would be like saying a spider isn't capable of spinning a web. They don't need anyone to teach them how, they just know how instinctively.

I know, they do. But not on a pro level like a 28 year old hb9 on top of her game

 

[Atom Smasher]

I’ve never seen such an example of self-damaging target fixation. This is pure lust, pure ego satisfaction. With a 20 year old kid who barely knows her ass from her elbow in life.

Dude, you seriously need to take a cold shower and get back to reality. This is counterproductive on so many levels and is a serious threat to your business. I know, I know... you’ve got it all under control.

 

[bat soup]

She mentioned it herself. She said I want to go to the restaurant we went to 2 months ago. We went to my administrator and went for dinner. We had so much fun and she said that she wanted to go again with me. Its corona now.. it’s closed.

She probably wanted a free meal. That's what she got, whilst you got nothing.

Plus, restaurants are a terrible place to take a woman. She's extracting resources from you whilst you're safely on the other side of a big table where you can't touch her. Impossible for you to make a move and find out whether you're wasting your time.

 

[mrgoodstuff]

Women are always capable of playing games, it's their nature. It would be like saying a spider isn't capable of spinning a web. They don't need anyone to teach them how, they just know how instinctively.

It's like the story of the frog and the scorpion...

There is a scorpion on the bank of a big river and it needs to cross. He sees a frog and asks him if he will take him to the other side.

The frog says "No way! You will sting me and I will die!"

The scorpion says "Why would I do that? If I do that we will both die!"

The frog thinks about it for a few minutes and says "You are right...it doesn't make any sense. Why would you do something that will kill us both?" He then agrees to take him across the river on his back.

Halfway through the frog feels a sharp pain on his back. He says to the scorpion "You fool! Why would you do that? Now we both will surely die!"

The scorpion looks at him and shrugs and says "I could not help it! It is in my nature!"

And that is how you must view women and playing games...they can't help it, it is in their nature...

Don't give them the ride so they can't fvck you over.

 

[mrgoodstuff]

I think you should recognize this situation is about your ego getting out of control and attempting to screw you over. You do realize you cannot always give the ego what it wants? It'll ruin you.