Desdinova Goes To Bootcamp (journal)

[Desdinova]

Rushing Dude, it's funny that you bring that up. This morning I actually forced myself to be curious and got into a 10+ min convo with a HB7. She was in the city for a couple of weeks visiting her grandmother. She's a child psychologist, and we got to talking about the province she's from, how the housing is killer expensive, and how she loves coming back to visit "home". If she actually lived here, I would've grabbed her digits.

 

[rushing dude 123]

Glad to hear Des, creating conversations like this are more natural, helps your social skills (these skills have hit me jobs), gathers you information about things, makes the person more comfortable with you and to be honest sometimes approaches like this are much more meaninful (to both you and her). However sometimes some approaches are called for in a less subtle manner, but seeing its just talking to strangers for now, this is very good.

Well done on your approach as well seems like you got to know her quite well and learned about her life and her feelings. So you have now made the transition from a total stranger into someone who is comfortable around you. However you should of asked for digits anyway and swapped numbers, tell her to call you when she comes back down to revisit again, she could turn into a future plate or even a good friend that could help you meet more girls later. Just thought i would put that option in your head as well.

Well i would like to wish you good luck with the rest of the bootcamp, but i don't like to believe in luck. Make sure to get to the end and put 100% in, thats the only way you will get to the other side.

 

[Kailex]

Desdi: +1 on starting over and being my girlfriend's fantasy.

Always enjoy seeing a new entry.

 

[Desdinova]

However you should of asked for digits anyway and swapped numbers, tell her to call you when she comes back down to revisit again, she could turn into a future plate or even a good friend that could help you meet more girls later.

Ah, the number close. If there's one thing I learned last time I was single, it's usually better to get the digits than regret NOT getting the digits. Just to let you know, it wasn't just talk, I REALLY do believe and live by that. The last time I number closed was about three months ago on a 23 year old I conversed with at a junk shop. My mind was thinking "this is going too well, I HAVE to ask for the digits" and I did, even though I was a bit nervous.

Getting the number close gives a damn good feeling of accomplishment. This bootcamp is to brush the rust off, and it appears that keeping convos going is the part of my game that is lacking the most. I'm actually glad I'm repeating this week, and I'm glad I'm reading Dale Carnegie's book.

 

[Desdinova]

Went out today and forced myself to actually try being interested in people. I had much fewer 'failed' attempts this time around and got into a couple of small convos.

I chatted with a decent looking older woman who was shopping for pillows. She was incredibly disappointed with the selection of garbage at Walmart. I told her about the fluffy ones I picked up at Superstore, and then we spent time laughing about how 5hitty the quality of Walmart's goods were. Great convo, not a bad looking woman.

The second convo was with a woman shopping for an electric mixer. Not as fun as the pillow convo, but it was a convo nonetheless. She was reluctant to buy the $7 hand mixer for fear that it would blow up in her hand! I asked her what she was wanting to bake, she said oatmeal raisin squares, blah blah blah.

What I found strange is both these women thanked me, as if they were dying for a good conversation. I've never encountered that before.

Regardless, the convos were light, fun, and over 2 minutes long. I can't even remember how I started each convo since it was so natural to just walk up to them and say something. I still definitely need more practice, and I'll be heading out tomorrow evening. For anyone else having trouble with week 2, I'd recommend Dale Carnegie's book. It's been most helpful.

 

[T From CA]

Went out today and forced myself to actually try being interested in people. I had much fewer 'failed' attempts this time around and got into a couple of small convos.

I chatted with a decent looking older woman who was shopping for pillows. She was incredibly disappointed with the selection of garbage at Walmart. I told her about the fluffy ones I picked up at Superstore, and then we spent time laughing about how 5hitty the quality of Walmart's goods were. Great convo, not a bad looking woman.

The second convo was with a woman shopping for an electric mixer. Not as fun as the pillow convo, but it was a convo nonetheless. She was reluctant to buy the $7 hand mixer for fear that it would blow up in her hand! I asked her what she was wanting to bake, she said oatmeal raisin squares, blah blah blah.

What I found strange is both these women thanked me, as if they were dying for a good conversation. I've never encountered that before.

Regardless, the convos were light, fun, and over 2 minutes long. I can't even remember how I started each convo since it was so natural to just walk up to them and say something. I still definitely need more practice, and I'll be heading out tomorrow evening. For anyone else having trouble with week 2, I'd recommend Dale Carnegie's book. It's been most helpful.

You mentioned you weren't that good at keeping conversations going and I see you're improving little by little. I can open, but after the first few follow up responses, I fizzle out quickly. After I'm done with my 50 eye contacts and hellos, I'm going try the direct approach route over the course of two weekends and see where I am. I'm not a good conversationalist, but I figure the direct approach is more suited for where I am right now. As I get more comfortable I'll add more to my repertoire......

 

[Desdinova]

Week 2 Day 2

2 more convos.

I swear, I go out on the 5hittiest days. The stores are pretty deserted at the beginning of the week. But these are the days where I don't have a child in tow.

Anyway, got into a convo with a chick at the dollar store about some of the crappy toys, and how making toys scented is a really bad idea. She was easily a HB5. Definately not my type, but she apparently had a bf. Good. I don't want her.

Also got into a convo with a sales lady at a store with candles, body butter, and all that lovely 5hit. I'm not counting her sales pitch as part of the convo. I moved from the sales pitch to my bedroom renos, and we stood there chatting about that, bedding, and other stuff.

I had a few failed convos with others. Tried one with a woman pushing a 6 month old girl in a stroller. Tried to converse with her about the joys of an infant, but her bf walked around the corner and kinda fvcked that one up.

Tried to converse with a middle-aged woman who was shopping for a toolbox...

Is the toolbox for you, or someone else?
"It's for me."
What are you going to put in it?
"Tools."
Oh, what do you fix?
(ignored me)
Do you fix cars?
(walks away)

Miserable bytch, LOL

 

[T From CA]

2 more convos.

I swear, I go out on the 5hittiest days. The stores are pretty deserted at the beginning of the week. But these are the days where I don't have a child in tow.

Anyway, got into a convo with a chick at the dollar store about some of the crappy toys, and how making toys scented is a really bad idea. She was easily a HB5. Definately not my type, but she apparently had a bf. Good. I don't want her.

Also got into a convo with a sales lady at a store with candles, body butter, and all that lovely 5hit. I'm not counting her sales pitch as part of the convo. I moved from the sales pitch to my bedroom renos, and we stood there chatting about that, bedding, and other stuff.

I had a few failed convos with others. Tried one with a woman pushing a 6 month old girl in a stroller. Tried to converse with her about the joys of an infant, but her bf walked around the corner and kinda fvcked that one up.

Tried to converse with a middle-aged woman who was shopping for a toolbox...

Is the toolbox for you, or someone else?
"It's for me."
What are you going to put in it?
"Tools."
Oh, what do you fix?
(ignored me)
Do you fix cars?
(walks away)

Miserable bytch, LOL

Keep it up man! My first week's going to be easy since I have no problem looking people in the eyes and saying hello. It's the second week that's going to suck for me because I hate doing extended conversations with strangers. I plan on just starting out being direct and to the point mixed in with a little humor in between and going for the quick close. Should be a good learning experience :box:

 

[Desdinova]

Week 2 Day 3

Banged off 3 more convos this evening. I went to a different Walmart for a change of scenery.

The first was this short old dude who lost his shopping cart. He completely got into telling me about how he goes to Superstore to do nothing, and gives his shopping cart to a poor woman in distress with an armful of groceries. The only things he buys from there is Duck and Roasted Chicken. Chatted with him for at least 8 minutes. Well, he actually did more of the chatting, I just listened and kept him going.

The second was a woman shopping for wool. We got into a convo about crochet, LOL! Her husband has really rough hands that destroy anything he touches, including anything she crochets.

The third was a cashier at a store in the mall where I bought something. This chick was easily a HB2. She had absolutely NOTHING going for her. Tall, skinny, no breasts, a nose that points slightly east, teeth that looked like my first car accident, hideous glasses, and always spoke as if her mouth was overflowing in spit. I'll tell you, I'd fvck a fattie with a cute face rather than fvck a near-sighted gargoyle

The woman ahead of me was a crochety old bytch who did nothing but turn her nose up and complain about how she was packing her precious wall-hangings. So me and HB-Gargoyle chatted about bytchy customers, people who were snobs, and I joked with her about how I'd come back and complain if my item was broken, as she didn't give me a reciept.

So I'm up to 7 convos already this week. Not bad!

 

[amoka]

lol... teeth=1st car accident

 

[Desdinova]

Week 2 Day 7

It's really fvcking difficult to maintain a goddam conversation when you've got a hyper 3-year-old in tow. I'm trying to do my bootcamp and he's trying to rip the goddam price tags off the shelves. This week has been difficult to finish. I had a concert to attend, had to find a replacement for my friend so I wouldn't waste a ticket, I have a constant Friday appointment with a lesbian who's helping me with renovations on my bedroom. It's been a nutty week.

I got two more convos in today, one about gardening with a woman holding a garage sale, and one about home-made pizza with a woman at the grocery store. Both were around 2 minutes long. I have one more convo to initiate and hold, and I'll be doing that for my night out. I'm hoping it'll be easy enough to bang off.

Next week I'm on holidays which is a freakin' bonus. I'll have lots of time to work on my approaches, and I may make it a goal to chat up more than 10 women. I'm still having trouble maintaining the conversation, so I'm scrounging through my old archive of seduction literature, specifically my collection of DYD newsletters before David Deangelo made his fortune. I need to get back into the swing of my old personality. I hope I'm having trouble getting it back because of lack of use - I avoided initiating conversations with women during my married years because I knew that I would carry it too far, and I almost did a few times. I kinda wish that I would have kept up that natural talent I had. I'll never forget the engaged asian chick I got to slow-dance with me at the bar. Got her to buy me a drink after saying all of two sentences to her.

One thing I remembered is that I learn best by example. I'll be looking up some good openers regardless, but will likely create my own out of those examples. I don't like using other people's stuff unless I can modify it to my own liking. I used Deangelo's lines for a while until I naturally came up with my own variants. The ****y/funny stuff fits my personality very well since I'm naturally very witty. My clients for work love my personality.

Every other element of my game should be good. All I gotta do is repair that broken bridge and I'll become unstoppable yet again!

 

[Desdinova]

So I banged off my last convo at the bar last night. Chatted up some older woman about the entertainment and one of the regulars. The great thing about last night is that I had a lot of energy and I was in a fantastic mood. My personality was shining, and the people I was with were just loving the energetic, enthusiastic me. I think I'm getting my old vibe back! I haven't felt that fantastic in a LONG time.

The unfortunate thing is there were virtually no decent women to approach. The best thing was a friend of a friend who is basically a HB5. Very plain looking, a bit overweight, but I must say that I liked seeing a woman who is a natural blonde for a change. Too bad the rest of her wasn't interesting.

So here I am at Week 3. I've got lots of reading to do, and I've got plenty of time to be approaching women this week.

 

[Desdinova]

Week 3 Day 1

Just got back from an outing with 3 convos under my belt. First one was with A hb7 worked at a blanket store. It's amazing how utterly turned off I can get once a woman opens her mouth. Her voice tone just generally pissed me off, but I managed to hold a bit of a convo with her just about the weather and 5hit. I didn't have the desire to listen to her for more than a couple minutes.

The next two were chicks who worked at radio stations. There was a big promotion thing going on in the mall, and I struck up a convo with a HB8. Chatted with her a bit, but she wasn't all that interesting. The other radio station chick was a HB6 with potential to be a 7. She wasn't dressed horribly attractively, she had ugly glasses, but had big fvcking monster tits. Convo with her actually went quite well. We were talking about how she worked at her dream job until her goddam phone c0ckblocked me by ringing.

I had a few other brief convos with other women. I got c0ckblocked by another ringing phone in Walmart just as I was getting into the convo.

I got approached by a girl who worked in a shoe store while I was kneeling down to look at shoes. I always seem to get things rolling better when I'm approached:

Her: Can I help you find anything?
Me: I'm just kneeling down, that's all
Her: Really? Thats awesome!
Me: You really think so?
Her: Yeah, it's awe inspiring!
Me: Well, feel free to bow down and pray to me if you like
Her: (laughing)
Me: Well.... What are you waiting for???
Her: (laughing)
Me: (grabs a square-toed men's shoe) Oh wow, are these really men's shoes?
Her: (laughing) yes!
Me: Dear god! That hideous!
Her: I haven't seen a single guy buy a pair yet
Me: That's probably why they're only $19

Then she cut me off in order to go back to work. It was going so damn well!

Tried to initiate a convo with one woman who just didn't wanna fvcking talk. She pretty much ran away from me, LOL!

I went into a book store where I bought a book on palm reading. I figured there's nothing wrong with having something like that in my arsenal, and I don't need to carry extra 5hit around to actually do it on people. I went and paid for my book:

Her: Hello! How are you today
Me: I'm fantastic! How are you?
Her: I'm pretty good. You look like you're fantastic!
Me: Thank you, that's because I am

Too bad she was working the till and there was a lineup behind me. But it just goes to show that I was in a great mood, and it was really showing today.

 

[Desdinova]

Banged off two more convos today, both at home depot. One with an employee, one with a girl shopping for paint. One was married, the other engaged. The convo with the engaged chick went very well. She had a friend in tow who had the face of my last bowel movement, so I didn't even bother with her. Tried with a woman at the gadget store, but I got c0ckblocked by the salesAFC. I know I shouldn't let that discourage me, but I really didn't care enough to pursue.

Heading out tonight, so I'll see if I can get any more convos.

 

[Desdinova]

My c/f vibe is slowly returning. Way back in March I number closed this HB7 at a junk shop. I took her out on a coffee date and pretty much dropped her for a STR with a HB8. This girl was fvcking awful at returning txt messages. It would take her DAYS to respond. She works at a place I occasionally do work, so I have the pleasure of occasionally running into her.

Two weeks ago, she sent me a txt message out of the blue asking how I was doing. I responded and didn't hear anything back. My dad was asking about her (he was in tow when I number-closed her) and so I figured I'd wake up the dead and send her another txt message:

"Did I ever tell you that your response time to text messages is nothing short of dreadful? After you read this and smile, feel free to respond "

Within ONE MINUTE, I got a response:

"What up Des?"

Surprised the hell out of me, so I wrote "Holy 5hit that was fast!" LOL

She was out with a group of kids so I suggested that she bring them all by to pull weeds from my yard. When she responded in the negative, I called her a 'big meanie.'

Her: I'll leave you to pull the weeds, and you get to work on your tan!
Me: You saying I'm pasty and white? That tears it! I'm upgrading you from "Big Meanie" to "Villain from Disney Movie"
Her: You're awfully sensitive today! I'm downgrading you from potential knight to Disney Princess, haha
Me: You're just trying to get me to fulfill one of your fantasies, aren't you? I'll dress up as a princess for you ONLY if you fulfill one of my fantasies...
Her: Okay, you're just dying to tell me your fantasies, so PLEASE SHARE!

Of course, I didn't

And it just kept going from there. I teased her about being into mud wrestling and how dirty she was, etc etc. I have NEVER had that good of response from her in the last 4 months and she was eating up every single text message.

Anyway, I'm off to donate blood and then hit the mall for some more approaches.

 

[Desdinova]

Week 3 Day 3

The thing that sucks about going into stores to do the bootcamp is that I'm spending all this money on crap I keep finding. More on that in a bit...

2 more convos with women today, a few approaches. I really wasn't feeling up to approaching today. Maybe I was just a bit dragged out after giving blood. I was walking around with bandaids on me like I had escaped a bad experiment at the hospital.

Anyway, I seemed to be getting really odd looks from people today. I took that and used it as an opener. I approached a HB7.5 working at a phone shop in the middle of the mall and said "Could I ask you something? People seem to be giving me odd looks today, do you notice anything off about me?" and it just went from there. Another one of my favorite questions to ask is "So, would you call this your dream job?" I found out she's going to school to become a lawyer. Nice red-head chick with a decent body. Convo went fairly well. The plus about developing rapport with chicks who work in stores is that I can return there in a day or two and chat them up again. I'm going to try that with next week and get a number close.

Second chick pissed me off. I walked into some indian art shop and encountered this HB8.5 trying to select a wall hanging. She works just a few blocks from where I live and apparently also has her own business at home. We got on topic of decorating rooms, the neighborhood, etc. The convo went so well that I went in for the number close.

"I should get going, but it was nice chatting with you. Why don't you give me your number and we could chat some more?"

The bytch handed me a business card and told me to come down if I ever wanted a massage. Needless to say, her card is going in the trashcan.

In the same place, there was a dude selling 3-D art. I'd been on the lookout for stuff for my bedroom since it's being renovated. My eye grabbed two pictures he had, but there was no way I was going to buy both at $40 a pop, nor did I want to decorate my entire bedroom with this stuff. One 3-D pic is unique, more make it tacky.

Anyway, since I couldn't decide which one I wanted, I flagged down a few women and asked their opinions. One picture got a unanimous vote. I bought it, and happily went on my way (albeit $40 poorer).

Here's the pic that got the unanimous vote

So I'm sitting at 7 convos. 3 more to go!

 

[amoka]

Des, you always confuse me when you say "I banged...." in your report. I was expecting some laid report but it is nothing of that sort. Great work by the way. I'm equally rusty in the field so I getta pickup on my game.

 

[Desdinova]

Yeah, it's a figure of speech. Blame it on my Canadian heritage, LOL!

So I'm sitting here thinking of how I could have handled the business card rejection better. I probably should have handed it back to her and said something along the lines of "I was more interested in getting to know you as a person, not just getting to know your hands. Have a nice day."

 

[amoka]

Yeah, that probably would have been a proper way of handling this several years ago but these days many business personal have their cell phone number on their so called "business" card. The other day I was at Wal-Mart and saw this fine woman and a man (I assume was her husband) walking at one of the aisle. I noticed the dude was pushing the cart while the woman had her arms folded walking beside him. I also noticed the couple (mere assumption) diverted with the man heading to the produce section while the woman headed to the jewelry section. Amoka must now approach.

The conversation went well... found out she is into real estate business. I also noticed a ring on her wedding finger which was later on confirmed that she was indeed married. Now the time came to number close her... then she handed me a business card. I told her "no. I want your CELL phone number... in case of emergency." "what emergency?" she wanted to know. "Just in case I need a place to stay in a middle of the night."... we bluff more and more... then "Well, the number on the card is my Cell phone number, you can call it anytime." Amoka is not going to be fooled so he dialed the number up. Confirmed!!

The gist is to not alway assume a "business" purpose only when you get a "business card". So, call her up to see what's up.

 

[Desdinova]

Week 3 Day 4

If there's one thing this bootcamp is doing to me, it's making me sick of all the local Walmarts and shopping malls. I'm tired of going to them.

I'm also not happy with my prime hours to go out and do this stuff. It's generally Sunday, Monday eve and Tuesday eve. Prime time is Thursday & Friday eve, and Saturday. This week I've been on holidays and my prime time is between 10am and 2pm. Do you know how many attractive women are out at this time? NOT MANY.

I haven't had a good day with this stuff. I had a convo with some girl in a clothing store about men and pink shirts. I tried to make it fun, she tried to make it a sale. I fvcking hate chatting up sales chicks or any female who is working. It's a couple steps down from initiating a convo with someone on a cell phone.

I'm also still struggling with convo material. Initiating convos is still easy. But the discouragement due to my lousy hours of availability for this stuff makes it more difficult to actually WANT to initiate anything.

Any suggestions for overcoming these obstacles? Perhaps a list of interesting or unique approaches to try in the field may help.