I haven't read all the replies because I honestly can't be bothered. What is clear to me is that you really don't understand attraction. Why do you have the opinions you do? Are you successful with girls?
1) "Looks don't matter. It's the level of your game that counts"
WRONG, Looks do matter. They matter so much, that it's impossible for a male or female to feel romantic unless they have some form of physical attraction for the person. Don't believe me? How many times have you been lying in your bed at night, waxing romantically about some 350lb pound chick? Now understand, beauty is in the eye of the beholder, and different people like different types, but whatever their type is, they have to be attracted to you physically in order to feel romantic towards you. I've felt pity, love and caring towards women I wasn't attracted to, but I NEVER felt ROMANTIC OR "IN LOVE" WITH THEM.
Bullsh!t! You truly don't understand a female perspective. Now you are in the same boat as most guys but it's sad you are giving advice on this forum. You see you say that because YOU are only able to feel romantic towards someone if they are attractive. This is because you are a guy, we all feel this way. Girls are different. Attraction is different to them, its evolutionary. They go for guys that give them FEELINGS. Sure good looks can give them this feeling, but that can be lost as quickly as it is gained, but so can PERSONALOTY. Oh. My. God. Did he just say personality? No I'm not making some excuse not based in the real world hoping that 'inner beauty' is more important like a fat chick would. This is based IN REALITY.
Girls go for guys that give them the FEELING of attraction. When I say personality I don't mean their hopes and dreams, I mean what comes across in their actions. A guy who is outgoing, funny, extremely comfortable around women, sexual, cool, experienced and confident is going to be extremely attractive to a LOT of women. Even if he is traditionally ugly. This is because he will make her feel, and he will trigger her attraction switches. Would a caveman know what he looks like? Would he care how good he looked, would him being good looking be important to survival? No. On the other hand how attractive women are is a sign of how well they will produce offspring. We want the best kids, they want the best hunter/provider and offspring. But the chance of the next generation surviving is hardly dependant on looks. The problem is not many people realize this consciously.
Also beauty is extremely subjective despite the fact that people argue otherwise. I have enough proof for my own beliefs by the fact that obese people used to be extremely attractive. Hah! How many people wish that was true in modern society? Also if I ask my mates who the best looking girls are we will all agree on some but we will never unanimously agree. There will always be some that I think "are you crazy?" and my choices are sometimes met with the same reaction. This is partly because you can find an average girl and build her up in your head so she now seems extremely attractive. There's a huge difference between meeting something and thinking 'They are hot!' as opposed to meeting the same person and thinking 'they are ok I guess'.
Now this argument is irrelevant because WE CANT CHANGE OUR LOOKS. So whether it matters or not isn't worth knowing. Here is a little bit that I posted in the HS forum before albeit slightly edited:
Now people might say looks and height matter, who gives a fck!? I don't like saying that because it leads to limiting beliefs which are pointless and hinder us. If you start worrying if looks matter you begin to second guess yourself! Unless you think you are hot that is. Would you rather be confident or second guessing yourself? It's as simple as that. I would rather be confident. I think I'm good looking, and I'm arguing that looks don't matter!
Even if being short does matter, what is better, wallowing in pity or accepting it and having a blast? A girl will always go with what she FEELS. If your looks and height do that for you, great! If they don't just do it some other way, that's where this website comes in. If you can make her feel nothing else matters. Raise your social proof, make her laugh, make her cry, take her on an adventure... and she will be yours.
Seriously am I the only guy who sees short guys with hot taller girls and ugly guys with hot popular girls? Apparently. The thing is these guys always have something else going for them.
So just forget what you can't change. It will only hold you back needlessly. Work on changing everything you can to better yourself, although even now you are fine as you are. Acceptance. Just accept it and it wont bother you anymore.
/End quoting myself. This is necessary because a lot of people on here think they are ugly, even when they aren't, and this kind of crap messes with their head and makes them lose confidence. Nice one. I used to think I was ugly, and it screwed me over. Now I don't but what really got me out of it was realizing looks don't matter much at all.
After all that I will admit that looks do matter a little bit. The thing is that you can break it up into face, body and clothes. Anyone can improve 2 of these. So you could have a ‘ugly’ guy with a attractive body that is well dressed. What then? Is he attractive? Is he still ugly? Whatever it is we should strive to improve those areas. Looks are not even close to the deciding factor, but they do help you form a good first impression and therefore get you in the door quicker. You might also get some cheap pickups, or maybe it’s a little easier. Either way it is no reason to get down if you don’t consider yourself attractive. I’m just saying don’t take the looks don’t matter thing to the extreme.
Posting the rest of this and hoping i haven't ran out of my 10 post limit!
