Confused!

[mavericks48]

Im new here, I do have a long post to post at a later date but basicly I need to know this asap, your opinions please. Had a girl break up with me, did it via email, lots of emails, mostly by me, texts to her with no replys back. Yes I was weak, the sex was great, she admitted it, she always said their was a strong connection between us. But I put her on a pedistol, after the break up I chased her for close to 7 mths now. The last time I texted her which was two weeks ago, she said “leave me alone, I don’t need any reminders, im trying to move on with my life” so get rid of my phone number and email, lose them.

But for some reason after that text she continued to text me,”why did you text me?” where are you?” I want to let you know im very happy”. She has an 8 year old son, she just turned 25. She broke up with the father of her son and began seeing me, we were together a year. She broke up with me 7 mths ago, but wanted to stay friends, I refused that. I just have not been able to get over her! However, after her latest comments I texted her that “im gone as you wish, you will never hear from me or see me again”!

Goodby…..name

She has never been on my friends list on FB or MySpace. Although she wanted too. She now lives with her ex in the basement of her ex’es fathers house! No dressers! One bed! He makes no money!!! Really o speak of! How can she be happy?
She has went to private on fb, she says she only kept her pics showing, for me. My questions are, should I block her from FB, she can still see my profile pics. Im thinking if I keep them up, maybe she’ll realize what she lost. Also, she can get on myspace and see everything of me.I did delete the email account we used to chat on and her phone# and emails.

Also, how can I show her that im gone for good and not coming back without using words! How can I show her that she may have made a mistake.

 

[Radharc]

Also, how can I show her that im gone for good and not coming back without using words! How can I show her that she may have made a mistake.

The first part is easiest thing ever, just be gone and go absolutely no contact.

The second part is harder, you can´t show her that, maybe she´ll realize it herself, maybe not, either way you shouldn´t really worry about that too much.

From your post you definitelly seem confused, all that texting and FB mess is even hard to make any sense of while reading it. But from what I get you want to get back with her, and you want to play with her head to achieve that?

 

[Warrior74]

Grow a pair and cut off contact. Stop being so spineless and weak.

 

[wasted-nick]

I went through a tough breakup a while back and experienced many of these same questions - I think many guys do.

Thing is, you can only show her you're over her by being over her. Don't block her on FB unless YOU cannot stay away from checking her out. It's gonna' take time to heal-up from a bad one, be patient with yourself.

Do go complete NC for YOUR sake - not hers. Everything you are asking/saying shows you are still attached to her. Your only goal now should be to break that attachment. It WILL happen - you will get her out of your head, but you have to make an effort to do so.

Clearly, she has poor judgment to stay in a situation with someone who sounds like a douche... I think that's suspect. Do not listen to your heart in these times, only reason. Your heart needs time to catch up to what you probably already know.

Keep movin' and keep the focus on yourself. You've done enough thinking about her in 7 months I guarantee. You'll be fine...

 

[mavericks48]

Ok, I have more time now, by the way thanks to all for not chopping my head off verbally. I thought for sure thats what would happen. I've been with a ton of woman, born and raised at the beach, a great vacation spot. I've never had a problem at all, not bragging but im a pretty nice looking guy, lucky for me. I always considered myself to be a very confident man until now. I guess this is a wake up call! As I said, im normally the one to do the breaking up.The relationship became tumultuous, lots of ups and downs after a while. And, it was because of me. I became surprisingly insecure, because I knew she had this ex thing going on. And as you all know I hope, when a child is involved, the ex can be a total abuser and it's still hard to pull a woman away from that. The dude is a young guy, but so f***ing irresonsible. On several occasions he couldn't even provide health ins for their child! The interenet and phone service gets cut off a lot, includes her cell. But yet she tells me she's VERY HAPPY! Her words were in the last texting after I said "Your going to lose the man who loves you the most" included"you know how much he loves me, so drop it"! I guess to her, love has nothing to do with making an effort to provide for your wife and child I guess!? Ha! Well, I know now that she's too young and immature, I wish she wasn't, I gave her way too much credit because she had decided to go back to school(gov grants to pay for it). I offered to pay for it, she declined..thank you! She told me, "I need to take care of my family"! I have money, and am in the process of building a business. She knows I can provide for her and the boy now! She said money doesn't matter to her.

The ex makes no real money to speak of. Big guy tho,cares more about going to the gym, goes about 6 days a week. Spends his money on protien drinks, but yet the kid wouldn't have health ins! I go to the gym 5 days a week somtimes. I keep in shape, but if I had a kid and money troubles and lived in the basement of my dads home!!? I would sure as hell work out and lift wieghts at home, put that gym membership fee towards my kids ins and or looking to purchase a home for my family or at least an apt so my wife/girlfriend and child could have decent bedrms!

What I was saying about FB, she is an attention ***** for sure! She puts all her pics on fb, mostly bar scene stuff w her and her friends. He did recently take a second job, at the bar where her and her friends hang out!!! he's a door man! BIG MONEY THEIR! Ha! So, I would block her every time I would get pissed, only to get weak and unblock her. Thats what I meant by back and fourth FB stuff. She's never blked me, except for now shes on private w her profile picture showing of course. She knows I go on and look, im sure she knows. As I said, I told her that she would never see me or hear from me again. Shouldn't I live up to at least that promise!? , by blocking her on fb and deleting my myspace account. I only had myspace up for her. Or does blking her show more signs of weakness? I at least want to walk away from this showing her that im not as weak as i've shown to be.

 

[Chosen1]

Damn you could do a lot better. she has nothing you need to really read the book of pook. He contradicts himself some but you need to focus on becoming the best man you can be and don't worry about finding the right one. I would not talk to her unless you are into playing mind games. Just leave her alone. Don't block her from FB you are above her get a new girl and I'm gonna do the same.

 

[Slickster]

Aww man this is sad!

- Tumultuous relationship
- Immature woman
- 8 yr old kid but likes to hang out at the bar
- Attention wh0re
- Told you specifically to leave her alone and not to contact her
- Is currently living with another guy



Wake up man!!!

It's over. It's over. It's over!!!!

You're writing a bloody novel here about something that should be an afterthought in your life!

Maybe the sex was good but the relationship sucked. That's why it is OVER.

Stop worrying about her and her new guy. Stop thinking about them! They are happy. You are hanging on to the painful past. Hanging on to something "good" that was never really there.

You're 47 yrs old and worrying about blocking her out on facebook! This sounds like highschool drama.

Move on brother. Find someone better.

Peace.

 

[Iceberg]

Or does blking her show more signs of weakness? I at least want to walk away from this showing her that im not as weak as i've shown to be.

I can't read all that stuff, so I'm trying to boil it down to one point.

Her bf's a loser. She sucks at life. And you're worried about showing signs of weakness.

Who cares? This is someone you're never going to talk to again. So why bother worrying about what she thinks? Delete her from facebook and move on. Forget that she exists. Dont worry about whether she's happy with her new man or miserable. Because the main issue is: SHE's WITH ANOTHER MAN.

Worry more about improving yourself. Worry less about "signs of weakness" to your ex girlfriend who's already banging a new man. She's totally irrelevant to your life now. Gone. G-O-N-E. Out of your life.

 

[mavericks48]

Yep!!!!!! You'er right!!! And guess what? Im done with it, promise to myself and all you Don Juans out their! Im taking no more **** from any chicks!!! After all I don't have too, this is the only bump i've had in my road..i've been lucky I guess! However, I love this site and i'll stay on it and keep reading!!! Thanks to all of you!

 

[jophil28]

Yes I was weak, the sex was great, she admitted it, she always said their was a strong connection between us. But I put her on a pedistol, after the break up I chased her for close to 7 mths now. .

Same old story- Guy gets struck dumb by pvssy , overvalues the owner to the max, girl goes back to loser ex, guy chases shank because they "had a great connection" , she retreats further , he drowns in his own emotional drool....
He eventually arrives at MM and types long sad story. Gets advice here , ignores most of it (if not all), continues to chase shank who wants nothing to do with him.
Finally realizes that he was "used" for her ego inflation, validation. entertainment, sex, entertainment ,distraction and various meal deals .

He returns slowly and tentatively to the single life - older and hopefully wiser .

 

[SoldMySoul]

Sometimes we think because we are older that we can't get sucked in to crap. This is simply not true. It happens, but the smart thing to keep in mind is after it happens is STAY OUT OF THAT HOLE you saw and walked right into.

Even though I will be 40 next year, I still find myself doing things that I know better and it bites me. Learn from mistakes, but do not keep repeating them. After dealing with a few women after my divorce four years ago, I too, got sucked in. I was out of the game for about 9 years because of being married. Then entered back into the game in great shape, confident and what at the time seemed like I had a purpose.

You just have to let that gut feeling that is telling you to run, have more power than what your heart feels!!!! I helped break my own heart more than a few times. Initially it was a woman's fault, but after seeing the bigger picture I broke my own heart and that is worse than letting any women doing it. You allow it and it screws you up. Mind shall always rule over my heart from now on!

I have been more upset with myself in the past after the smoke cleared than I was with any woman. Those red flags mean everything and if you acknowledge them and do nothing about them, then you had it coming. I can say that after a few heart breaks I blamed on women. Now I view it in the proper prospective, It was my fault because I allowed it!

Never, ever let someone mistreat you. Their past behavior will be their future behavior ONLY IF you allow it by sticking around when your a$$ should have turboed off.

I am still growing and a work in progress, Maverick, DO THE SAME!

 

[mavericks48]

RE: Jophil28,
Yes! you'er partway right, but I have taken the advise on here! Im done, oh and im kicking myself in the a***s for being such a wuss! This was my first post and I have ignored none of the advise!!! The email accounts, history! The myspace account? History! The fb is now set to private and probably she'll be blocked tomorrow opr even tonight! But, yes, I have to admit ur post was funny as sh**t! But it's the trueth. I admit, I got hooked on the pvssy!!! I never did before as I said, but for some F***ing reason I did on this one! I just have to work on me now! But I have taken all of your advise and it's done and done with it!

 

[mavericks48]

RE:Soldmysoul,
thanks for that, good post, really. I've always had to me attractive woman, yes, a few 5 and 6's in their but mostly 8's, 9's and a few 10s! Never stayed for a variety of different reasons, but this one? Different! We talked about all kinds of stuff all the time, like we had been best friends. As I said, she was the one that said the connection we have/had /is/was great, she never had a connection like this before, bla, bla, bla,. Then all of a sudden the waters got rough, some of the arguments felt to me like she created them. Oh, well, I still am crazy about her, why, not sure! She is clearly lower class and not as smart as I thought. But its done, no matter what it's done and so am I! It won't happen again!

 

[vatoloco]

Yes! you'er partway right, but I have taken the advise on here!

Well good for you.

Unfortunately, here in the forums it's usually the situation that jophil28 describes: posters usually ignore the good advice given to them because they're too blinded by the pvssy to see what's good for them.

 

[mavericks48]

Ok guys, so last night im sitting at my desk reading the book of Pook. Really a great read, but somthing kept eating at me. You can ask 10 people, all 10 can give you advise and somtimes out of all 10, one just sticks more then all the rest. The one that stuck with me was Warrior's statement: Grow a pair...stop being so spineless and weak. So, childish or not, I blocked her from FB, means now if she wanted to just chk in to see my pics or if I put any new ones up, she can't. She probably can see them from one of her sisters computors when she visits them, but not from hers. So, she would have to visit them. Anyway, I had to do it, I thought wether she cares or not gets pissed off or not, who gives a F*****K!!! I outclass her and her friends obviously, so she doesn't deserve to be able to look at pics of me. The only way she could contact me is thru my business email, and I cannot chg that, too many clients and prospects have it. Ok, whatever. I know FB is childish, but I use it for business, so it works for me. I know I should be above all the fb stuff as far as blocking her but, I did tell her that she would not see me or hear from me again! So for once, I need to stick to what I said.

 

[Rollo Tomassi]

Time for some DJ Math.

Word Problem:

A girl just turns 25, and has an 8 y.o. son by a young thug. How old was she when she gave birth?

25 - 8 = 17! Excellent!

Bonus Question:

Considering it takes 9 months for a human fetus to gestate, and the girl "just turned 25", how old was she when said thug impregnated her?

17 - .75 = 16 +/- 3 months!

A+ sir! A+!

So the take home message for all of you playing at home is; even a woman as necessitous as one to become pregnant in high school will still find living with her abusive, self-absorbed, poverty stricken, thug ex-boyfriend's father's one bed basement preferable to being worshiped and loved by an adoring, well off, AFC beta provider.

 

[mavericks48]

Hey guys, need some advise again. Had a medical emergency this morning and I was going to call my grandmother to tell her about it. In my haste, for some crazy reason, I guess im so used to calling the ex, I called the ex'es number instead!!!! I realized I had dialed the wrong # because my grandmother does not have vm, as soon as I heard the vm I looked at my phone and saw that I dialed her# instead!!! and quickly hung up of course. What should I do? Should I email her which I know by heart and tell her it was a mistake? Or should I not care what she thinks and forget about it. I've been NC for about almost two weeks since she told me to loose #'s etc. I just don't want her top think that im an a****ss whole and called her or because of the holiday maybe I was in a drunken stuper. Let me know what you all think I should do. FYI, as I said, i've blocked her from everything and got rid of all her info. Thanks, recovering AFC!

 

[LeftyLoosey]

So the take home message for all of you playing at home is; even a woman as necessitous as one to become pregnant in high school will still find living with her abusive, self-absorbed, poverty stricken, thug ex-boyfriend's father's one bed basement preferable to being worshiped and loved by an adoring, well off, AFC beta provider.

Laughed out loud, applauded, all that good stuff.

 

[jophil28]

Hey guys, need some advise again. Had a medical emergency this morning and I was going to call my grandmother to tell her about it. In my haste, for some crazy reason, I guess im so used to calling the ex, I called the ex'es number instead!!!! I realized I had dialed the wrong # because my grandmother does not have vm, as soon as I heard the vm I looked at my phone and saw that I dialed her# instead!!! and quickly hung up of course. What should I do? Should I email her which I know by heart and tell her it was a mistake? Or should I not care what she thinks and forget about it. I've been NC for about almost two weeks since she told me to loose #'s etc. I just don't want her top think that im an a****ss whole and called her or because of the holiday maybe I was in a drunken stuper. Let me know what you all think I should do. FYI, as I said, i've blocked her from everything and got rid of all her info. Thanks, recovering AFC!

I find it strange that you physically dialed at least 8 digits manually without realizing whom you were dialing.

Anyways, that being said, my suggestion is to do nothing , absolutely nothing. If she contacts you, ignore her messgae and do not pick up.
Ride this out. It will likely fizzle out.

 

[mavericks48]

Oh, tell me about it..I swear I did it just like that! I couldn't beleive it myself! I smacked myself in the head about 20 times! I did it w/o even thinking! But I figured the same advise, ignor it! Just wanted to double check. Hey, realizing after all of this that I must have truned into an afc, to recover and re-learn, am I going about it correctly by starting w the book of Pook? Then the DJ bible and reading from there?