Coming off too strong?

dosquito

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Just got back form a very nice outing with HBPancakes, we went out for breakfast.

I actually like her a lot more than I thought. She's a total sweetheart and has very nice eyes (i'm a sucker for pretty eyes). Her flaking seemed to check out for the most part and I of course kept her wondering the whole time if I'm interested, while laying the groundwork with some very minor kino. Had a good time!
 

dosquito

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EMERGENCY UPDATE (and lesson on networking):

Was chatting with a girl friend on facebook. I barely even know this girl but I met her once and knew her through a friend kinda, so got some good rapport started.

we got to talking about dating and stuff since she plans to stay a virgin througout college and I take her side to build rapport, talked about how lots of guys here just want sex etc.
this eventually led to her asking me point blank if I ahd a girlfriend, to which I said no not really...but if you know any cute French girls...

This girl said actually I do! and links me to a


STUNNNING

8.5/10 brunette's facebook profile!

and the way she's talking I might actually get a warm introduction (much easier than cold approach! You already have something to takl about -- mutual friend -- as well as social proof!)

So there's a little lesson on networking for you.

If DJ's can pray for each other, then pray for me guys! This girl looks like a catch and a half.
 

dosquito

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HB 6.5 was over last night. Had a good time...Concerned she might be getting attached although she doesnt want admit it (makes coments about cleaning my room if i want and "anything for you, dosquito"). Suddenly everyone has lost interest in this journal
 

ARrocket

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dosquito said:
Just got back form a very nice outing with HBPancakes, we went out for breakfast.

I actually like her a lot more than I thought. She's a total sweetheart and has very nice eyes (i'm a sucker for pretty eyes). Her flaking seemed to check out for the most part and I of course kept her wondering the whole time if I'm interested, while laying the groundwork with some very minor kino. Had a good time!
How long til you see her pancakes? :D

Sending you a PM
 

Mr. Bond

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dosquito said:
EMERGENCY UPDATE (and lesson on networking):

Was chatting with a girl friend on facebook. I barely even know this girl but I met her once and knew her through a friend kinda, so got some good rapport started.

we got to talking about dating and stuff since she plans to stay a virgin througout college and I take her side to build rapport, talked about how lots of guys here just want sex etc.
this eventually led to her asking me point blank if I ahd a girlfriend, to which I said no not really...but if you know any cute French girls...

This girl said actually I do! and links me to a


STUNNNING

8.5/10 brunette's facebook profile!

and the way she's talking I might actually get a warm introduction (much easier than cold approach! You already have something to takl about -- mutual friend -- as well as social proof!)

So there's a little lesson on networking for you.

If DJ's can pray for each other, then pray for me guys! This girl looks like a catch and a half.
This is good news, but I read it and said NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!!!!

Fvck the HB X/10 scale. See what's going on here? You're excited as sh!t about this girl. I bet you wonder if you can get her. Stop thinking in terms of this scale! If you wonder if you can get her, you probably won't.

The girl is either a 0 (I wouldn't bang her) or a 1 (I would bang her). This way you don't put the "HB 8-10's" on a pedestal.

So this French girl is a HB 1. You'd bang her. Find out more about her. Is she good enough for you?
 

dosquito

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That's right, looks are just one thing! By no means will it hasten her screening process, if I can help it! I realize I shouldn't get excited but that's not fully within my power. But such concern is on my radar!
 

Packers2010

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it's good to see you doing so well man.

though, don't worry about your oneitis girl. i facebook messaged mine after she liked one of my posts ( don't have her on my friends list, so I knew she was doing it to get me attention) of course we end up fighting ( it's all we do) but before that i hadn't talk to her in Months man.

so don't worry about it... i think " once a oneitis girl, always a oneitis girl"

good to see your going after other girls also. you wanna chat pm me :)
 

dosquito

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I don't think of her much at all, but I am kind of upset at how things broke off because I don't like how it reflects on my character. Don't let that girl get you down, man! There are so many girls out there...
 

dosquito

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Ran into frenchie at a student club today and introduced myself briefly. I left to wash my hands and said I would like to talk with her when I come back, but she gave me a weird response and I couldn't tell if it meant she thought I was blowing her off or she didn't want me to come back. Anyway she is shorter than I thought from the picture and not as cute as I thought either. I feel no reason to go out of my way in further pursuit
 

dosquito

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I guess I'll going to keep updating this log in the meanwhile:

Last night: met HB 7.5 had a short but really good conversation, she lives in the same dorm as my girl friend, gonna try to set something up

saw hb6.5 out, said hi and eventually brought her back home. There are so many subtle details that I wish I could capture in this report, but let me just say it has been an eye opening experience for me to see what girls are like to guys that they deem as high value. hb6.5 pretty much acts grateful for any attention i give her and even has moved on to the point where she references the fact that I'm "available" and is okay with it (i was asking her about me getting a haircut and she said 'maybe get your haircut if the girl likes shorter hair' or something like that). all of this just from being BRUTALLY HONEST and an enjoyable person to be around, and also social proof has made things a lot easier for me. When a girl sees you as high value, she lets you dictate the terms of the relationship and is grateful for anything she can get, you call the shots. Pretty cool, huh? It's definitely been a paradigm shifter for me. It's almost like secret knowledge that the average frustrated chump can't even fathom
 

dosquito

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What's up players, havent been on this site ina while.

I've been focusing on my coursework.

No ladies in my life presently. Lots of frustration. When it rains, it pours! HB 6.5 moved on to other things because I wasnt going to move her up to the next level.

Received a facebook message last week from oneitis, whom I havent spoken with for almost a year other than a message I sent her several months ago which explained that I was not proud of my behavior and that I dont have any bad will against her. I think I get the gist of the message, but thought a fresh set of DJ eyes might help:

"Hey, I wanted to say how sorry I am about the way things turned out. I'm sorry it's taken so long for me to respond, my only excuse is that I felt very uncomfortable with how I acted back in August- i evidently wasn't able to explain how I felt about any of this clearly, because I have a lot of respect for you and I've regretted losing your friendship. I'm really sorry, and I think you're a truly remarkable person. Thanks for sending me an olive branch back in January. I hope you're doing okay?"


my interpretation: She is at least partly interested in seeing how easily I am willing to forgive and forget everything despite this half-assed "apology" letter. I think she genuinely misses our friendship (as do I, to be perfectly honest), because I have a very unique character. She's embarrassed about everything that happened and wants me to say "don't worry about it" so we can be friends.

The alternative would be that she's done with her boyfriend or thinking about it, and is testing her options for the Summer and beyond. That she really does have feelings for me but melted down in a very tight, uncomfortable situation and took the safe option of staying with her boyfriend because she was confused and didn't know what to do. But this seems quite improbable, and is basically just the typical beta mindset of holding out for hope that just isn't there.

I care about oneitis -- I'm not ashamed to admit this. She's a terrific person even if she has problems. If not for my attraction to her, I would be proud to call her my friend. However I feel that my hand is entirely exposed. If there's something oneitis wants to say, she needs to get it off her chest. What she sent me here is...nothing. I replied as follows, just a few minutes after reading the message:

"
I understand: life is confusing.
We both have plenty to be embarrassed for.
I did not send you an olive branch." (I didn't send her an olive branch, lol. Some other poor schmuck?)
 
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Purefilth

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The "olive branch" - is not literally an olive branch. Its a metaphor for the message you sent her (obviously in January) - which she took as a peace offering from you.


I would wonder why it took her so long to reply -


my best guess?

She is single now, and wants to reconnect with her "gay best friend".

Basically youre not out of the friendzone here, she's checking that her gravitational pull on you still has its full effect.

Be very wary. I wouldnt reply. But If I was desperate to fly back into her orbit with the slightest hope of tapping that azz - I would give her a half assed, non - committal response and see what HER next move is.

Is she willing to make a move - to put some effort into a meet?

If she is, then you make it difficult for her to meet you. Yuo become extremely busy. Then, you accept a date and you dazzle her with your newfound confidence and DonJuanism!! then you take her to bed and smash her back doors in!

Anything other than complete interest and svxual intercourse will earn her a one way ticket to NEXTville. :D
 

dosquito

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Lol, I would be a doofus enough to not understand the olive branch thing. Never heard that phrase before. Considering that, my message seems kind of hostile.

I guess at this point all I can really do is decide whether I would be comfortable being friends with her. But I just don't think that could work for me, unfortunately. Anyway, I hope she does well. I don't see any reason to be bitter over someone simply not sharing attraction

Otherwise I had pretty much the same thoughts as you PF. Like I said, my hand has been revealed. So either she's testing her pull or needs to make a serious statement otherwise -- or she just really wants to be friends, and in that case I will let her know that I need to keep a distance
 

dosquito

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Well then, it's been almost a week since I sent that message. I followed up today by clearing up the olive branch thing and going into more detail about how she is forgiven in the sense that I don't blame her for anything. I hold myself and bad circumstance accountable for ruining an otherwise good friendship. I left it at that. No suggestion or friendship or anything more. I am not looking for anything. I'm glad I got the chance, if nothing else, to say some things that at least leave us on a more humane parting note. I'm not really sure what outcome could come of this that's actually a good outcome. She could straight up tell me that she made a mistake, was scared, and wanted/wants to be with me...but I'm not even sure where that would leave us. I would have to think about it. Then for all other potential outcomes, well it's not like we can be friends, so that's just not going to happen. The moral of the story is love often sucks: that's why so many players keep themselves emotionally distanced by spinning plates.
 

dosquito

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going out to meet hb7 at her party tonight, being semi-introduced through a friend.
 

Steven Hennigan

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Hey bud, be yourself! works almost all the time. You and I am alike in some ways. drop the smooth talk and well... just talk! Good women like men that they can see themselves with long term and not one that seems to be the "perfect fit" for EVERYONE else. Be cool!
 

dosquito

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Thanks for the encouragement, Steve. HB7 seems like a real sweetheart -- and this is what both of my insiders (girl friends) told me. Got her number tonight.
 

dosquito

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You wanna talk about "being yourself"? Check out this ultra corny text I sent HB7 this morning, lol. I dont even give a **** these days. Either it will crash and burn or she will love it. But the main point is no one else would sent this text.

(last night, I gave her my # so she sent a text so i had her #)
"Hey, it's ________)"

(this morning)

"Good morning Ms ________ -- a pleasure to meet you last night. I could get lunch tomorrow, in honor of memorials, or Wednesday, in honor of your beauty. If that makes you uncomfortable, we can honor my beauty. After all, I'm the one who always gets his beauty rest [relevant to conversation last night].
-Name
(Disclaimer: Do not expect my jokes to ever improve or get less corny.)"
 

dosquito

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HB7 replies:

"It was nice to meet you as well. Except you must know right off the bat that beauty rest is much overrated. While I am busy on the day of memorial, i only ave class at 1:30 on wednesday and could do lunch."

What do ya'll think?

I think I can give HB7 a thumbs-up here. She has clearly taken my style (of properness) into consideration when replying, which shows a decent interest level. I'll confirm a date later tonight. I know there's a joke to be made about beauty rest somewhere here, lol.


Edit: texted HB7:

"Oh, youre just too young to understand. Old men like me value their sleep very highly, though we all have our exceptions...Let's go get lunch at ______ and eat outside if the weather is nice"
 
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dosquito

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Hey players, I got a message back from oneitis. She basically said she appreciated what I said. Finally she ends,
"I guess, going forward, I'd really like to know: how have you been for the past few months?"

I don't even know where to begin. I'm just confused. I don't like the direction that the conversation is headed. Should I tell her that I appreciate the gesture -- that I understand she wants to have our friendship back, but it's just not going to work out for me?
 
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